Chapter 12Jules
CHAPTER
TWELVE
JULES
Four days.
Four days of Gavin and me getting lost in one another and the new bond we share.
I collapse on the bed after another orgasm. The brain fog that always accompanies an omega’s heat is mostly gone, and has been for a few hours. Gavin falls beside me, wrapping his arm around my back and stroking my side.
He really is too handsome for his own good. Or mine.
We’re mated. In some ways that’s great for me, but what about him? Sure, I like him. He’s the first person I’ve ever liked, but his children are closer in age to me than I am to him. Will he be upset when the high of my pheromones and sex wears off?
He presses an open-mouth kiss to my shoulder and I hide my smile. Gavin makes me feel safe and cared for. Before him, I never really had that, but it’s so fucking selfish to want more. Now that I’m thinking clearly, I know I’ve done something awful to someone who has done nothing but show me kindness.
“I’m so sorry.” We’re mated because of me. Because of what I started four days ago in his car. He tried to protest and what did I do? I took my pants off and climbed into his lap. I took his cock in hand and put him inside of me.
“Not yet.” He tugs me over until I’m pressed against his chest and lays a kiss to my temple. Our combined scents linger in the air. I squeeze my eyes shut and after days of nearly non-stop sex, sleep comes quickly. When I wake I’m clean and dressed in a pair of pajamas that aren’t mine, but I’m alone. The spot Gavin has occupied for days is empty, but I smell food. My stomach roars and I stumble out of bed.
Gavin is in the kitchen, standing at the stove, his sweatpants hanging low on his hips as he flips pancakes. I wrap my arms around my middle and curl into myself. What do I say? What should I do? We’re mated. That’s not something that can be taken back.
“Hi,” I finally manage.
Gavin glances over his shoulder. “How are you feeling?”
I roll my shoulders as I clench at my shirt. “Like I went a few rounds with an alpha but okay.” I’m sore but not the bad kind. Gavin wasn’t rough, not even when he was lost to a rut.
“Here.” He pours a glass of juice and brings me pills. “They’ll help with any pain.”
“Thanks.” I take them and the juice but don’t know what else to say.
Gavin returns to the stove. “Are you hungry?”
“Starving.” Not like I had been a few weeks ago, and not like in the past when I was locked in the shed behind my parents’ house and told to pray for relief. This is just... hunger.
Between rounds, when the overwhelming need to be fucked had eased, Gavin had given me food and water and made me rest. He took good care of me and I... “Gavin.”
He shakes his head, his long hair cascading down his back. “How about you get comfy on the sofa or climb back in bed and I’ll bring you a plate when it’s ready.”
Is he avoiding talking about what we did? Is that a bad sign?
What am I even supposed to say? We hardly know one another and now...
I blink back tears. Gavin steps away from the stove again and wraps his arms around me, pulling me into his chest. His breath is warm on my temple as he presses a kiss to my hair. “Everything’s going to be okay, Juju.”
I sniff as my arms drop to my sides. “You regret it, don’t you?”
How can he not? We mated. I don’t know that I regret it though. Gavin is such a nice guy. Any omega would be lucky to have him. Me, included. If he regrets it though, I can leave. Just... disappear and he can forget about my entire existence.
“That’s neither here nor there.” His hands are warm on my back as he sways us from side to side in the kitchen. “It’s done. It’s not something we can undo so let’s enjoy breakfast before we sit down and figure out what’s next.”
He just wants to ignore it while we eat. Then what—we figure out what this means for us? But how do we even start to make sense of what we’ve done?
I’m so stupid. How do I get myself into these messes? Now I’ve dragged Gavin into one as well. He has a family, children to think about.
“Hey.” Gavin tips my head back and leans in, pressing a chaste kiss to my mouth. It’s innocent in comparison to everything else we’ve done but my face still flushes hot under his gaze. “Good morning.”
“Oh, um, good morning.” I bite my lower lip as Gavin pushes my hair behind my ear.
“Just let it sit as it is on its own for a bit, okay?” he whispers as he cups my jaw. “Get used to the weight of it, and we can talk about it—decide what it means for us and how to move forward. Us doesn’t have to be a bad thing.”
“Okay.” I don’t think us being mated has to be a bad thing either. I like Gavin enough to know that falling in love with him will be as easy as breathing. There’s a lot to love about him—how steady and dependable he is; how kind he is, to his children and to perfect strangers. If he’s okay with being claimed by me, I’m okay with being claimed by him.
“Go get comfy.” He tips his chin towards the living room. I settle on the sofa, and a few minutes later Gavin brings two plates out of the kitchen. My stomach clenches as my mouth waters. His food always looks, smells and tastes amazing so I don’t hesitate to accept my plate and dig in.
“The boys are staying with Baz for the next couple of days.” Gavin sits beside me with his plate. Our thighs press together. “I thought we could use some space.”
“Is Altair finished with his heat?” Is he still downstairs?
Gavin nods as he cuts into his fluffy pancake. “He’s on a three-day cycle; he wasn’t here when I got up this morning.”
He probably ran for the hills. It must’ve been unpleasant to come out of his heat and walk face first into mine.
I poke at the eggs on my plate. “I hope they’re not upset that they can’t be home right now. I don’t mean to push them out of their space.”
Gavin presses his shoulder against mine. “You’re not. This is your home too, now. And it doesn’t bother them to make space for you.”
“If you’re sure.” Even before all of this, his family has always been accepting of me. Not counting the time Callum was having a bad week. He said sorry for pushing me, and four days ago protected me from an unruly alpha. Altair gave me some of his old clothes. Baz and I haven’t interacted a lot but the few times we have he’s been nice to me.
“I’m sure.” Gavin eats and I do too.
When we’re finished, he sets our plates on the table and wraps his arm around my shoulder. I lean into his side and tuck my legs under myself. “I don’t want things to be awkward between us,” I tell him as I pick at the pajama pants I’m wearing. “You’ve been really kind to me, and you’re easy to talk to. I don’t want that to change.”
Gavin’s fingers are warm as he massages my neck. “We get to decide how this goes. I can’t say there won’t be some awkwardness as we adjust to things but awkward or not, I hope you keep talking to me when something is wrong, and that I can talk to you about my troubles.”
“Yeah. I want that.” It’s a good feeling, to know Gavin will still listen when I have something important to talk about, and is willing to talk to me about anything that’s bothering him. Maybe us talking about our fears and doubts means we could work through them together. Like a proper mated couple and not two people thrown together by the consequences of our actions.
Gavin presses his cheek against my hair. “For what it’s worth, I’m sorry I lost my head. I should’ve had more self-restraint; done a better job of protecting you. I can’t take back what’s been done, but I won’t fuck up quite so badly again.”
“No.” I shake my head and pull back so I can see him. “Don’t be sorry.” My cheeks burn and I shift against his side. “I kind of forced myself on you. I’m the one that’s sorry.”
He chuckles and tugs me back against his chest. “How about we split the blame and call it even? I forgive you. You forgive me. And we talk about what’s next.”
“Yeah. Okay.” It’s better if we start off on even footing. “But for what it’s worth, I don’t regret any of it. Or, maybe the timing and how it went down but not that it was with you.” I bow my head as heat creeps over my face and down my neck.
“I’m a lot older than you, Jules.” Gavin combs his fingers through my hair and settles me against his side again. “I’ve got three kids. That’s a lot of baggage to take on.”
If we’re comparing baggage and whose weighs more— “I have a stalker who’s been chasing me from place to place for the last eight months. Your kids are sweet compared to my baggage.”
Gavin smothers a laugh. “We’ll deal with your coyote problem when we have to.” His arms tighten around me and I clench my fingers in his shirt. “When Baz and Callum fuck around and call you Dad, we can revisit this conversation.”
I frown. “I know I’m older than Callum but Baz is the same age as me. Why would he do that?”
“To fuck around.” To tease me. The same way they all tease one another. Like family.
I rest my head on Gavin’s chest. “I won’t freak out. Your family feels like what a family should be. If that means being teased a little, I can handle it.”
“Your family now too, you know? This” —Gavin strokes the bite marking his possession of me— “can’t be undone. By all laws—natural and manmade—you’re one of us now. A Strange.”
I press my face into his palm and inhale deeply. My scent is mixed with his, the same as his is mixed with mine. Anyone who catches it will know we belong together, that it’s a good match because there’s a balance in it—a push and pull between our two scents that complement one another. He may be an alpha but his scent doesn’t overpower mine.
“I’m happy to be family,” I admit. The Strange family is nothing like the one I grew up in, where the alpha is to be obeyed and the omega to obey, and I like the difference.
“My omega, then?” Gavin asks, and I look up at him. He already bit me. I’m his whether I agree to it or not. But Gavin is a good person—he’s not going to take what isn’t offered, even if I already offered myself to him in the heat of the moment.
I nod. “Your omega. My alpha?”
I never thought I’d be happy to be claimed, or to claim an alpha as my own, but I am. Gavin’s bite doesn’t feel like ownership. It’s belonging, but not to him, simply with him and his children. A member of the Strange family.
Gavin smiles and brushes a soft kiss on my cheek. “I guess my mother was right. Pine Glen is the kind of place people plant roots, even when they don’t mean to.”
She knew something about Pine Glen the rest of us don’t because when I first arrived, I never planned on staying. If not for Gavin’s offer to feed me I would’ve moved on weeks ago, but because of his kindness, we’re mated, and I’m putting roots down in a place that feels like home in a way the place I grew up never did.
“I’m glad I stayed.” I climb into his lap and tuck myself under his chin.
Gavin wraps his arms around me and helps me settle. “Me too.”
I close my eyes and relax in his arms. I’ve never felt so at ease before. It’s a little scary, and I know at any minute something could happen to shatter my newfound peace and happiness, but right now I want to live in the moment.
With my alpha.