10. Chapter 10
Chapter 10
M iles held Jules close to him under the warm and soft comforter.
“What’s your life like in D.C.?”
Jules considered the question, her mind still fuzzy with relaxation. “It’s different than life here in Riverbend. Faster and more…” she searched for the right word, “intentional. Everyone is working towards an end game.”
“Do you like that?”
Again, Jules paused to think about the question. Her defenses were down, and she was more vulnerable than usual, but she still wanted to be thoughtful in her answer. She shouldn't reveal too much.
“I guess a part of me does. The part of me that enjoys healthy competition. It keeps me on my toes…”
“I feel a ‘but’ coming,” Miles said a few seconds after Jules’ answer trailed off.
“But, it can be lonely. Sometimes, I wonder if all the work is worth it. Don’t get me wrong, I love writing and creating, but lately I’ve felt detached from purpose. It’s hard to explain." She ducked her chin to her chest under his warm arm.
How could she put it into words when she didn’t understand it herself? She’d only started thinking about it in the last few weeks, although she could tell it had been lingering in the back of her mind for some time now. And being here, wrapped in his arms surrounded by his scent, the last thing she wanted to think about was D.C. It felt so far away, memories of it coming in broken and unclear.
“When do you go back?” he asked, stiffening.
“In a couple weeks. I suppose I could go back at any time now. Grandma Rosa seems to get along fine on her own. She doesn’t need me like I thought.”
“Hmm, maybe she doesn’t need you to take care of her physically, but I’m willing to bet she still needs you,” he said into her shoulder, kissing it and pulling her tighter.
“You’re probably right. But enough about me. What made you come back to Riverbend? Did it have anything to do with Mr. Fedema?” Jules stretched her neck to put a little space between them.
“Yes and no. It was a series of things that led me back.”
Miles continued, telling her about the hard years that followed high school graduation. About moving to Chicago with his cousin, Ricky, two days after receiving his diploma in the mail, although leaving out details from prom night.
Jules’ heart broke as she learned about him living in a rundown apartment on a questionable side of the city for a few years as his cousin became more and more entangled with an illegal drug operation. At first, it was just selling weed here and there, which Miles even took part in to make some extra cash to supplement his meager income as a pizza deliveryman, but it got out of control.
“It was a low point in my life. I never thought about the future. College seemed like a thing that was for other people, not me, a broken, hopeless young man with no prospects and a criminal record,” he lamented.
“Did you stop playing music?”
“Not right away. Eventually I sold my instruments for the cash. By then, it didn’t even matter. I was bouncing from job to job, just trying to get by. I’d lost myself, and Ricky was the only person who’d stuck around. I tried my best to keep him at arm’s length, because I knew what he was involved in. But it was hard, the Miles you used to know was gone,” he said, voice cracking with a pained look pinching his face.
“And then, a few years in, Ricky got busted in a massive sting operation. Turned out he was selling more than just weed. It was bad, and he’s still in jail. He will be for a long time. When it happened, I even felt guilty for not being with him. I thought maybe I could have done something to prevent it.”
He took a deep steadying breath. “But it ultimately served as a wake-up call. It was Roxy and Jax who convinced me to get out of the city. They knew some friends up in Michigan who had a place for rent and could get me a job as a late-night truck driver, so that’s what I did.”
Jules didn’t know what to say. Never in her wildest dreams did she think it could have been this bad for him. While she was heartbroken and in a dark place during that time, she was also living in a safe college dorm, going to classes and learning, not worrying about making rent or being caught up in something illegal. It seemed too unreal to fathom.
“Oh Miles, I’m so sorry you went through that,” was all she could say, pulling him closer.
“It feels like another life altogether now. And I’m grateful it happened when it did. It allowed me another shot at building something decent and stable."
Jules felt so much adoration for this man who could now look back on a time like that and see the good in it. It reminded her of the kind soul she fell in love with years ago.
“For a few years, I just worked and slept, saving up money. I didn’t know what for, until I started playing guitar again. After that, I knew I wanted to go back to school. But since I was older, I needed a written recommendation to apply, so I reached out to Jason on a whim, not expecting him to respond.”
“That’s how you got in?”
Miles laughed. “Not quite. Jason called me one day and put me through the wringer a bit. I guess I deserved it. But after that conversation, he agreed to write a recommendation and even call the department chair at the school I was applying to. I think he always hoped that I’d turn my life around.”
“That’s remarkable, Miles.”
“It wasn’t easy, but it got easier after that. Jason helped me through it, taking early morning phone calls to talk me through some of my assignments and give me encouragement when I needed it, which was often. He’s the reason I pursued a degree in music education after all. I owe so much to him.”
Now it all made sense. Jason must have asked him to take over once he retired and Miles couldn’t turn him down after all he’d done for him. That had to have been why he moved back to Riverbend. Jason saw the potential in Miles. No way he would have turned the reins over to someone he didn’t have full confidence in.
“I’m sure he’s just as grateful for you. I don’t think Mr. Fedema would have let just anyone lead his band. You must be quite the instructor, Mr. Greene,” she teased, playfully running her hand down his torso.
“I could show you if you’d like,” he growled, cupping her breast as he wrapped his leg around her. Jules certainly wanted to be taught.
***
Early the next morning, just as the sun rose over the treetops, Miles dropped Jules back at the house and she tiptoed inside, hoping not to wake her grandma before she could change and claim probable deniability that she’d stayed over at Miles’. Although she didn’t feel guilty about it, she also didn’t feel like discussing her sex life with her grandma, especially because it felt like so much more than just sex. As she climbed the stairs, a stupid grin plastered on her face, she reminded herself to take it slow. This was no time to get wrapped up in anything serious. Don’t catch feelings, she reminded herself.
She quickly changed out of her clothes from last night, throwing on an easy yellow sundress that made her feel like she should frolic in a field. It matched the way she felt inside. Making her way back down to the kitchen for coffee, she knew she was a fool for thinking she could get anything past Grandma Rosa, who sat there with a smug smile.
“Have fun?”
Not turning to face her, Jules grabbed a mug from the cabinet and filled it with warm coffee from the pot her grandma had brewed.
“It was a perfectly pleasant night."
“That’s not the swagger of a woman who just had a ‘pleasant’ night."
“Since when do you use words like ‘swagger’?” Jules asked, trying to change the subject.
“Oh honey, my generation invented swagger, don’t flatter yourself. Are you planning to see more of Miles while you’re here? Looks like it’s doing you some good.”
“Maybe, but it’s not serious. Don’t get too excited. We’re just having a bit of fun while I’m here. Nothing more than that,” Jules explained, more to herself than to Rosa. She’d have to work on reminding herself, and him, of that if they were to see each other again. It would be too easy to get hurt again.
***
The following week, Jules cooked non-stop, taking food to the retirement community with Grandma Rosa’s friend Val almost every night. She was working her way through the recipes she’d organized a few days earlier and gaining more confidence in her cooking skills each meal.
After a while, Jules suggested tweaks and additions to her grandma’s recipes. To her surprise, Rosa encouraged her edits. It gave Jules the opportunity to hone her skills, making unique pasta sauces and sensing when and how to use anchovies to deepen a dish’s flavor profile. It felt like her own personal culinary school right there in her grandma’s familiar and well-loved kitchen.
While the mornings and afternoons flew by cooking and sharing stories with her grandma, Jules tried to make the evenings last as long as possible.
After that first night with Miles, he’d fallen into the habit of texting her each afternoon to see if she was free for the evening. Jules liked how he seemed nervous each time, making him hard to resist, even though she knew they were playing with fire. She found herself spending every night at Miles’ after she’d made sure her grandma settled in for the evening.
The pattern went like this: Miles picked her up around eight. They’d go back to his house, he’d play some music and inevitably, they’d make their way to his bed, forcing Sir-Toots-A-Lot to scratch at the closed door. Not much talking happened while they were together, which suited Jules just fine. Surface-level was all she could handle, and Miles somehow knew that. The time never felt right to bring up their past and she accepted that, grateful to not revisit painful memories.
Every so often, her thoughts would wander to the future and where this was leading, but the relentless cooking during the day kept her focused.
Thankfully, her grandma didn’t bring up the topic, either. She just nodded to her as she said goodbye each night, which was encouragement in itself. Rosa wasn’t known to stay quiet if she thought you were making a mistake.
For the first time in her adult life, Jules didn’t have her next move plotted and planned. She was living in the moment, enjoying the short reprieve from what she considered her real life back in D.C.
“You’re…glowing. Is it all the sex you’re having?” Winnie even asked at one point.
“Wouldn’t you like to know?” She didn’t like to kiss and tell, but Winnie had a point. The sex was doing her some good.
They’d also been spending more time together, more in those two weeks than they had in the past five years combined. Almost every morning, Jules joined Winnie at the high school to help with play rehearsals. She couldn’t say the cast was good, but they certainly worked hard. But it didn’t matter. Jules enjoyed being around people who understood the compulsion to make art for the sake of it. It roused a part of her that had been suppressed for a long time.
About a week into her new routine, while stuffing artichokes with her grandma, her phone chimed with the tone reserved for her boss, Becca. Wiping her hands on the baby blue apron that her grandma had found for her in the back of the pantry, she tapped the screen.
Call me when you get this. Thx!
Jules groaned. She still owed Becca the signed papers for her new role, and she probably wanted to know what the holdup was. Too bad Jules didn’t know why she hadn’t signed them, either.
Excusing herself from the kitchen, she hurried to her room and closed the door behind her. She didn’t want to have this conversation in front of her grandma. Steeling her nerves for the awkwardness sure to follow, Jules hit the call button. There was no use delaying it. To her surprise and disappointment, Becca picked up on the first ring. A part of Jules hoped it would go to voicemail.
“Jules! Thank God you called back.” Becca sounded frazzled. Maybe this wasn’t about the papers after all.
“Hey, what’s going on? Everything alright?” she asked, taking a seat on the edge of her bed.
“Yes, yes, only Secretary Monahan needs to give testimony at a Senate hearing on Friday and wants you to work with him on his remarks and be there at the Capitol.”
“This Friday? As in two days from now?” Jules responded, doing some mental math.
“I know I promised not to bother you, but he specifically asked for you.” Becca lowered her voice. “Between you and me, he’s a bit rattled by the request to testify. It was very unexpected. If you catch a morning flight tomorrow, that will leave you plenty of time to work with him all day before Friday’s hearing. I wouldn’t ask if it wasn’t important.”
“Right, I know. I just—” Jules said, catching herself. She just what? Couldn’t come because she’d miss having sex with her high school sweetheart? Or because a few ladies at a retirement home were looking forward to her cooking? “Never mind. I’ll book the first flight out tomorrow.”
After their conversation, Jules sat in her room, paralyzed by the thought of packing, leaving her grandma, and losing a few days with her friends. Even though she knew Grandma Rosa would be fine on her own with Val checking up on her, Jules had zero motivation to step back into her real life right now.
Allowing herself to sit with the news, Jules took a few deep breaths to steady her thoughts and gather the energy this would require before grabbing her suitcase to fill it for a quick trip. She’d fly back Saturday on the earliest flight she could get.
That night, after explaining the situation to her grandma and a quick phone call to Winnie, Jules relaxed next to Miles on his couch as he strummed his guitar. He looked so at ease with it in his hands, she allowed herself to melt back into the comfortable cushions, taking in the sexy sight. He had grown an affection for tight-fitting V-neck t-shirts, and she could see why. They showed just the right amount of his chest without looking like an extra on The Jersey Shore . Her mouth went dry at the thought of running her hands underneath it later, just before taking it off.
“Am I boring you?” he asked, lifting his eyes to hers.
“Quite the opposite,” Jules said, meeting his gaze. “I don’t know how any of your students concentrate when they have you to look at.” He rolled his eyes and laughed, playing louder.
Although she enjoyed listening to him play, she found herself trapped in her thoughts. The topic of her trip to D.C. hadn’t come up yet, and she didn’t know why she’d put it off. Miles needed to know, or else he might feel blindsided again, which was the last thing Jules wanted.
During a lull in his strumming, Jules finally mustered the words she needed, “Miles, I got a call from my boss earlier. They need me to go back for a few days.” He stopped strumming the guitar, jerking his head up to look at her.