24. Avery
24
AVERY
“A nother drink, hon?” Paige eyes me critically.
I try to smile, but it feels too difficult. And I don’t have to pretend with my best friend.
“Make it a double.”
She pushes through the crowded bar and I wait in the corner, trying to blend into the crowd that’s gathered for Jake’s auction. Some tables have been cleared away to make room for a raised platform.
Mom and Dad sit in a booth chatting with Jackson, The Landing’s owner.
He’s an ex-Marine, and he towers over the booth, nodding quietly as they talk. His skin is dark ebony, and his black hair flecked with silver. He runs this place with his wife and their kids help out, although I heard his eldest son just enlisted.
I didn’t want Mom to come tonight because I thought it would be too painful for her to see Jake’s things being auctioned off. But she insisted.
Paige comes back with a rum and coke for me and a cola for her.
“Where’s Noah?” I ask.
I’ve hardly seen my friend without her baby attached to her since Noah was born.
“He’s with Mom.” She sighs. “I miss the little guy. But I wasn’t going to miss The Event of the Year .”
I cringe at the words, and she screws up her face. “I’m sorry, hon. That was insensitive.”
I take a sip of my drink and wince at the strength of the double shot. “It’s fine. I’m okay with the auction. It means Jake’s things will go to people who need them. I just hope we raise lots of money for the center.”
I scan the crowded bar. It seems half of Hope has turned out, and plenty of people have come down off the mountain too.
“Who are the hotties in the leather jackets?” Paige blatantly stares at a group of leather-clad bikers wearing Wild Riders MC jackets.
“They’re a veterans motorcycle club. Their headquarters are near Wild.” I mention the small town on the other side of the mountain.
Paige nods appreciatively. She scans the crowd, and her eyes narrow when she gets to the opposite corner.
I don’t need to follow her gaze to know she’s spotted Ed. I’ve been aware of exactly where he is ever since I arrived, and I’ve made a point not to look in his direction.
“Have you spoken to him yet?” Paige asks.
I shake my head. “There’s nothing to say.”
She raises an eyebrow at me. “You sure? You seem to be holding onto a lot of anger.”
She’s right. I’m annoyed at myself for falling for Ed when he told me from the start not to expect anything. I don’t have much experience with men, but I’m sure there was a connection between us. I’m annoyed at him for not wanting to stick around to explore it.
I handed him over to Maria at the clinic because I didn’t want to pretend I was okay with seeing him. I’m not.
I read the note he slipped under my consulting room door. But all it said was that I deserve better, which is a cop out. He’s too cowardly to stick around.
I guess I pegged him all wrong.
Someone brushes against my arm, and I turn around to find a guy I don’t recognize grinning at me. “Sorry, darling.’”
“It’s okay,” I say and turn back to Paige.
There’s a pressure on my waist, and I spin around to find the man still there. His arm darts back from around my waist.
“I’m Karl.” He offers a hand to shake.
My upbringing has me reaching my hand out on instinct. It would be rude not to. But I regret it as soon as our hands touch.
He squeezes my hand too tight, and I’m caught in his clammy paw. I try to pull away and he keeps hold of my hand, brushing the back of his palm against my breast.
My heart sinks. The last thing I want is some moron getting handsy with me. “Sorry, I’m not interested.”
I turn back to Paige and roll my eyes at her. Why on earth do men think just because you’re in a bar you want to be picked up? And tonight, of all nights, with the auction about to start.
At that moment, Joel steps up to the makeshift platform they’ve put in the middle of The Landing.
“That you all for coming,” he says into the microphone.
There’s a tap on my shoulder, and I turn around to find the sleazy man, Karl, still there. He leans toward me, and I catch a whiff of beer and hotdog on his breath.
“You didn’t tell me your name.”
“She said she’s not interested, fuck face,” Paige says, just as the room falls silent.
All eyes turn to our corner of the bar, and the only noise is feedback from the microphone Joel’s holding.
The man still doesn’t get the hint. He chuckles and lifts a hand to the sea of faces that are now watching us.
“It’s all right. My future girlfriend is just playing hard to get.”
The arrogance of some men is unbelievable. I cross my arms over my chest and turn towards the stage and Joel.
I’m not one to swear at strangers the way Paige does. Ignoring unwanted attention is my usual MO when a guy can’t take a hint.
I focus on Joel, willing him to continue and get this auction underway. I’ve dealt with plenty of men like Karl in my time, and they all go away, eventually. Eventually he’ll get the message that I’m ignoring him and his sleazy lines will turn to insults, no doubt about my weight.
But he’s a persistent sleaze ball. I feel his spindly fingers on my arm, and I brush him off and take a step sideways out of his reach.
There’s movement from the other side of the room as Ed pushes through the crowd. He leaps onto the stage and strides across it before jumping down the other side and landing straight in front of me.
I suck in my breath, because I haven’t been this close to Ed in days. His scent permeates my senses, and I’m transported back to his bed and the things we did there.
His gaze lingers on mine for only a moment. But it’s enough.
Memories flow between us of what we shared, of his bed, and everything that happened in it. His gaze is soft and full of regret. Then he turns to Karl and his expression hardens.
Ed’s fist connects with Karl’s face, sending him reeling backwards into the people behind him. A gasp goes up from the crowd, and a bar stool falls over as Karl goes down.
Karl screams and holds his bleeding nose, writhing on the ground in pain.
Ed flexes his fist and advances on Karl and I pull him back, scared for the man on the floor.
“What are you doing?”
He tears his eyes off Karl and turns back to me, flexing his fist. He’s breathing hard and his mouth tries to form words, but all that comes out is a grunt.
Paige claps her hands together. “Nice one, non-verbal boy.” She gives Ed an appreciative look that turns stern. “But you’re still the biggest asshole in the room.”
“You had no right to hit him,” I say.
The entire town is looking at us, and Mom’s mouth has dropped open.
Ed just looks at me in frustration, like there are things he wants to say. But unless it’s to tell me he’s staying, which it isn’t, then I don’t want to know.
Who the hell does he think he is, sending me that note and then punching out a guy as if he owns me?
“You have no claim on me, Ed,” I hiss, trying not to let the entire town hear our conversation. “You made that perfectly clear.”
He huffs out a breath and looks away. Someone helps Karl up, and he has the good sense to scurry off to wherever he came from.
Ed doesn’t deny I don’t belong to him. He isn’t reaching for his notepad to confess his feelings or tell me he changed his mind. He isn’t begging forgiveness and promising to stay.
Suddenly, all I see is the confused boy inside the man. The one who doesn’t believe he belongs anywhere. All the anger drains out of me.
Perhaps Ed is right. Perhaps he’ll never have the balls to stick around.
When I speak again, it’s much softer. “You want to keep believing you don’t belong here, Ed, that you’re an outsider. But take a look around. Everyone’s here because of you. Maybe one day you’ll stop running. But you were right in your note. I deserve someone who’s got the courage to fight for what they want.”
He looks stunned, and I clap my hands to my sides to stop from reaching for his face and drawing him toward me. I’m standing up for myself, and even though my heart is breaking, it feels right.
Mom stands up from her chair, and I give her a silent shake of my head.
I’ll be fine. My heart will break in silence, and maybe one day I’ll get over Ed and find a man who thinks I’m worth fighting for. But Ed isn’t it.
“Let’s get you home.” Paige puts her arm around my shoulders and guides me out the side door of The Landing. I don’t look back.
As we leave, I hear Joel make a joke about bar fights and good times, and the crowd laughs as he turns them back to what really matters. The auction.
“I’m proud of you for sticking up for yourself.” Paige squeezes my shoulder as she guides me to my car. “That asshole doesn’t deserve you.”
I don’t look back as I walk away from Ed and everything that might have been if only he would’ve given it a chance.