Ten
August 1994
Stunning.
That’s how I always describe the view as I arrive back in St Felix via train. As it winds its way around the pretty Cornish coastline, I, along with all the other passengers, get my first glimpse across the sea of the little harbour town I still call home.
And that view, after all this time, still makes my heart leap with joy, especially now I spend most of my time in Glasgow. It’s a warm summer’s day and St Felix looks picture-postcard perfect as the bright sun shines over the town, highlighting its quaint beauty against a vivid azure sky.
As I alight from the train with the other passengers on this Wednesday lunchtime, I too carry my luggage along the platform, then up some steep steps towards the town.
But unlike most of the other passengers, I won’t be staying in a rental cottage or a B I think they kept in touch. He’ll be at the wedding, won’t he?’
‘I have no idea.’ I shrug innocently. ‘Right, I’ll be off. See you later.’
‘Bye, love, have fun with Claire. Just like the old days, eh?’
‘Perhaps,’ I say to Mum. ‘Or perhaps not,’ I mutter under my breath as I leave the house.
How could we possibly have much in common any more? Claire is getting married, whereas I couldn’t think of anything worse to be doing right now.
As I walk down the hill into town, I think about what Mum said about me using cheating as an excuse to break up with my boyfriends. I haven’t exactly had a lot of relationships in my twenty years on this earth, and I definitely
haven’t had the experience I had six weeks ago with Paul before, but have I been cheated on that often?
I definitely ended relationships when I suspected a couple of my boyfriends of messing me around, but Paul was the first I actually caught doing it. But I certainly wasn’t imagining the others, and, even if I was, why would I do that?
I wonder if the others are all going to be here on Saturday. It would be good to see everyone again. Even though we tried to keep in touch, it became more and more difficult after we all went our separate ways and left St Felix.
I walk along the familiar cobbles of Harbour Street, pausing outside the florist. I glance at my watch. I still have plenty of time before I’m due to meet up with Claire, so I open the door and the familiar sound of the bell rings above my head.
There seems to be no one in the shop as I enter, but then a little head pops up from behind the counter.
‘Hello,’ I say to a little girl with long dark hair, who looks familiar.
‘Hi,’ she replies shyly.
‘Is Rose about today?’ I ask as another head pops up next to the girl; this time it’s a slightly older boy and I know immediately who the children are: Poppy and William, Rose’s grandchildren.
‘She’s on the phone out back,’ the boy says. ‘Can we help you?’
I smile. ‘That’s kind of you, but if it’s all right with you I’ll wait for Rose. I don’t know if you remember me, but I used to work here. I remember the two of you coming to visit your grandmother for your holidays.’
‘Yes, I remember you,’ Poppy says. ‘Your name is Frankie.’
‘That’s right, and you are Poppy and William.’
‘I’m Will now,’ the boy says with a serious expression.
‘Sorry, Will it is. You’ve both grown a lot since I last saw you. You could barely see over the counter the last time I was here.’
‘I’m nine now,’ Poppy says.
‘And I’m eleven,’ Will says proudly. ‘I’m going to secondary school in September.’
‘Oh, how exciting,’ I tell him. ‘I hope you enjoy it.’
‘Frankie!’ Rose calls as she comes into the shop. ‘How lovely to see you again!’
Rose hurries around to the front of the desk to give me a hug. ‘I didn’t know you were coming back; how long are you here for?’
‘Just a few days. I’m back for my friend Claire’s wedding.’
‘Ah, yes. I’m doing the flowers. Of course you’d know Claire; she’s about your age. Do you know Jonathan, her fiancé, too?’
‘Not really, only Claire. We were best friends at school.’
Rose nods. ‘That makes sense. Have you met Jonathan?’
‘Only briefly.’
‘And what did you think of him?’
I haven’t really formed any opinion of Jonathan. He seemed OK – a bit uptight maybe, not really my type at all – but Claire seemed to like him, and that was all that mattered.
‘He seems like a good chap.’
‘Good, then I’m sure he is.’
I’m slightly puzzled by Rose’s comment, but I’m not sure why.
‘I’m so pleased you’re doing their flowers,’ I tell her. ‘I know you’ll make a great job of them. I see you’ve got two new assistants helping you out in the shop.’
Rose looks proudly at her grandchildren. ‘Yes, they’re doing wonderfully. Almost as good as you were.’ She winks at me.
‘I bet they’ll be even better in time.’ I smile at Poppy and Will still looking up at me from behind the shop counter.
‘Have you time for a cuppa?’ Rose asks. ‘I was just about to put the kettle on. I’d love to hear all your news.’
I glance at my watch again. ‘Oh, I wish I had, but I’m supposed to be meeting Claire in a few minutes.’
Rose looks disappointed.
‘How about I try to pop in another time while I’m here?’ I suggest. ‘Then we can have a good catch-up and a gossip?’
‘I’d like that, Frankie. I’d like it a lot.’ Rose pauses and looks me up and down. ‘You’re looking well. University really suits you.’
‘It’s art college, but thank you.’
‘Yes, you’re definitely finding your own style; I can see that. I’m pleased for you.’
‘Thanks,’ I reply, knowing that Rose means this as a compliment. My mother has long given up commenting on what I wear when I return home. Discussions about appropriate clothing for a young lady fall on deaf ears these days, and she knows it. ‘Right, well, I’d better go. It was good to see you again, Rose, and you too, Poppy and Will.’ I smile at them. ‘Look after your Granny Rose, won’t you?’
‘I prefer Grandma,’ Rose says, smiling. ‘I’m not sure about looking after me, but they keep me young, that’s for sure!’
I leave the shop and head down to the harbour. I’m due to meet Claire at the tea rooms on the harbour front and, as I approach, I see her already sitting at one of the outside tables.
‘Frankie!’ She waves at me. ‘Over here!’
We greet each other with a hug.
‘Oh, it’s so good to see you again,’ Claire says, sitting back down at the table. ‘It feels like ages since I saw any of you guys.’
Claire is the only one of us mermaids who hasn’t left St Felix for work or university or college. Instead, after her A levels, Claire took a job at the primary school in St Felix as a teaching support assistant. There, she met her first and only boyfriend, Jonathan, who is a teacher and now her fiancé too, and that’s where she stayed.
‘I was here at Easter,’ I tell her. ‘It’s not been that long.’
‘I know, but I didn’t see you that much then. Besides, so much has happened since.’ She places her hand carefully on her stomach.
‘Oh my God, are you telling me you’re pregnant?’ I ask, staring at her.
‘Shush, it’s early days,’ Claire says proudly. ‘I barely knew at Easter, I only suspected. We’ve not even told our parents yet. We’re telling them after the wedding.’
I stare at Claire. How can she be this happy? She’s the same age as me, and yet she’s getting married and expecting her first child – in my eyes that’s the worst thing I could imagine happening to me right now. I have so much I want to do before settling down.
‘I . . . I’m pleased for you,’ I say, trying to sound happy. ‘That’s amazing news.’
Claire smiles. ‘I know you don’t understand why I’m so happy about this. I’m sure my situation would be a complete disaster for you and all the other mermaids. But I love Jonathan, I can’t wait to marry him on Saturday, and then in approximately six months have his baby.’
Claire looks so genuinely happy that I can’t feel anything other than delighted for her.
‘If you’re happy, then so am I,’ I tell her, smiling. ‘Would I want to be doing what you are right now? Absolutely not. But if this is what you want, and I can see it is by the look on your face, then I wish you and Jonathan the very best of luck.’
‘Thank you, Frankie. That means a lot. Really it does. Now, I want to hear all your news?’
A young boy waiting tables comes out and takes our order.
‘I don’t really have any news,’ I say, trying to think of something to tell her.
‘How’s Paul?’
‘Paul and I broke up.’
‘Oh, I’m sorry to hear that. Jonathan and I thought he was great.’
‘Yeah, well,’ I reply. ‘You know, it happens.’
‘Anyone new on the scene?’
I shake my head. ‘Nah, I think I’m done with men for a bit.’ I stare out at the harbour at the fishing boats bobbing about on the waves.
Claire waits before speaking again. ‘You know, Rob is coming to the wedding on Saturday?’
I look back at her across the table. ‘Is he?’ I try to sound unfazed by this news. ‘That’s nice.’
‘He’s not bringing anyone.’
‘What do you mean?’
‘Like a plus one.’
‘Neither am I. So?’
‘Nothing.’ Claire shrugs and looks at the waiter bringing our drinks to the table. ‘Thank you,’ she says as he puts them down in front of us.
‘Let me know if you want anything else, won’t you?’ he says, before he moves on to another table.
‘What did you mean before?’ I ask. ‘Come on, Claire. I know you, remember?’
Claire sighs. ‘Yes, you do. And I know you too, Frankie?’ She raises her eyebrows at me.
‘What?’
‘It’s just . . . it always seemed like such a shame that the two of you never got together, not properly, anyway.’
‘That was a long time ago now,’ I say with as much indifference as I can manage.
‘Only five years,’ Claire insists.
‘A lot can change in five years, Claire. Besides, we were just kids then. He was simply a schoolgirl crush.’
She shrugs. ‘Maybe. He’s at Cambridge now, isn’t he? Do you know what he’s studying by any chance?’
‘History and modern languages, I think?’
Claire smiles. ‘That’s very specific.’
‘What is?’
‘That you should know the exact degree he’s taking.’
‘ No
. . . ’ I insist. ‘I think my mum must have mentioned it, that’s all.’
She nods in the same knowing way Mum did earlier.
‘Claire, leave it,’ I tell her. ‘Just because you’re about to get married and have a baby, it doesn’t mean everyone has to be partnered up too. Don’t turn into one of those
people.’
‘What people?’
‘The ones who, once they’re married, spend all their time trying to get everyone around them hooked up with someone. I’m happy as I am right now. I’ve got an important year coming up at college with my final show; the last thing I need is to be worrying about relationships. It will be nice to see Rob on Saturday, that’s all, in the same way it will be great to see all the other mermaids. Who else is coming?’
‘Mandy should be arriving tomorrow from London; she’s not bringing anyone, either.’
‘How is Mandy? Is she still working in the city?’
‘Yes, I think she’s doing quite well at her company.’
‘I didn’t expect anything less. Mandy was never one to mess about when she had something she wanted to do.’
‘Er . . . ’ Claire thinks. ‘Eddie is arriving Friday; he is
bringing someone.’
‘Ooh, who?’
‘New boyfriend, apparently. He met him in a bar in Newcastle.’
‘He’s still working with the theatre company, then?’
‘I think so. He was pretty gutted when he didn’t get into drama school, though.’
‘Yeah, he was really down for a while. I was quite worried about him when we spoke on the phone. But he seems happy now. I think he gets to move around quite a lot when they’re touring and stuff. Sounds fun seeing lots of different places.’
‘Yeah.’ Claire doesn’t seem to share my enthusiasm. ‘If you like that sort of thing.’
‘What about Suzy?’
‘She’s going to try to get here – she has a gig on Friday night in Bath, but she’s going to drive down straight afterwards.’
‘I still can’t believe that Suzy, out of all of us, is the one who ended up on stage,’ I say, thinking about how Suzy changed after the night of the Enchantment Under the Sea dance. ‘She was the one who wouldn’t perform at that dance and made the costumes instead.’
‘I know, she really blossomed after that girl encouraged her up on the stage to sing. What was her name again?’
‘Marnie,’ I say, annoyed I have to think about her once more. She didn’t even come to our school in the end; we only ever saw her that evening. But in the course of one night, she not only ruined mine and Rob’s blossoming relationship, but she changed Suzy’s life for ever.
‘That’s it – Marnie. Yeah, she really had an impact on Suzy by getting her to sing that night. We never found out what she said to her, but thank goodness she did. Suzy was a changed person after that.’
‘She sure was.’
It was a complete surprise that evening, back in 1989, when Suzy suddenly appeared on the stage to sing, first with Marnie, and then afterwards on her own. We already knew Suzy’s voice was amazing, but to suddenly hear her perform in front of everyone that night was incredible, and that first performance at the Enchantment Under the Sea dance not only completely changed the direction her life took over the course of the next few years, but gave her so much belief in herself too. Whereas before Suzy only shared her views with us, afterwards she became much more confident in sharing them with others too.
I have no idea what Marnie said to her that night to get her up on the stage, or even how she knew about Suzy’s voice, but she did Suzy a huge favour, one that was still paying dividends now.
‘You know, she nearly got on Stars in Their Eyes
?’ Claire says.
‘Did she? I didn’t know that.’
‘Yeah, she auditioned to be Sade, I think, but they went with someone else in the end.’
‘Imagine one of us mermaids on television. That would have been amazing.’
‘You’d have thought it would have been Eddie if it was going to be anyone.’
‘Yes, Eddie was always the theatrical one.’
‘I still am, darling!’ A familiar voice behind me makes me turn around.
‘Eddie!’ I say as he approaches our table. ‘Claire said you were coming Friday.’
‘I was.’ Eddie gives first me, then Claire, a hug. ‘But Joe and I broke up, so I couldn’t wait to get away for a few days.’
‘Oh, Eddie, I’m sorry,’ I tell him.
Eddie shrugs. ‘ ’Tis what it is,’ he says matter-of-factly. ‘Now, tell me all your news, and what’s been going on? Then,’ he looks excitedly at Claire, ‘I want to hear all about the wedding – what you’re wearing, who’s coming, every little detail, darling!’
Eddie and I spend the next hour or so sitting with Claire listening to her talk with enthusiasm about her forthcoming wedding and catching up on all our news.
‘Then we shall be each other’s plus one,’ Eddie says, taking my hand when I tell him about Paul. ‘We definitely won’t let each other down!’
‘I’ve sat you all around the same table,’ Claire says. ‘So you can all have a good catch-up. I’ve called it the mermaid table. Well, in my head I have. It’s actually table three on the plan. I’m quite jealous of you all. I’ll miss out on all the fun sitting at the top table.’
‘Don’t be silly, it’s your wedding day – you’ll have the best time.’ I squeeze her hand. ‘I’m sure nothing exciting will happen and we’ll all just be chatting about old times.’
‘Exactly!’ Claire says. ‘I miss that. I want to be a part of it again.’
‘Couldn’t we all meet up before the wedding?’ Eddie asks. ‘When is everyone else coming?’
‘Mandy should be here Thursday evening,’ Claire says. ‘But Suzy isn’t coming until late Friday, possibly Saturday morning, because she has a gig Friday night.’
‘Ah, I see. And I guess you’ll be wanting an early night on Friday?’
Claire nods.
‘What about Rob?’ Eddie asks, giving me a quick sideways glance.
‘I think Friday,’ Claire says. ‘He wasn’t too sure.’
‘Do we still count him as one of the mermaids?’ Eddie looks at me again.
‘Why do you both keep looking at me when you mention Rob? He’s nothing to do with me any more.’
‘But he was, darling, for a while.’
‘Briefly. Very
briefly one summer, that’s all. If he hadn’t been a part of our Misfit Mermaids performance that night, no one would even be mentioning him now.’
Claire and Eddie exchange a glance.
‘Look, as I was saying to Claire earlier, we were at school then. A lot has changed in the last five years. We’ve all moved on. We only went on a few dates, and after that summer his parents sent him to private school. We hardly saw him.’
‘We did,’ Claire insists. ‘Sometimes at weekends, and in the holidays. He always made the effort to catch up with us, even if he was at another school.’
‘Didn’t do him much harm, did it?’ Eddie says. ‘Going to private school. He ended up at Cambridge University. I bet he’s right hoity-toity now.’
Claire shakes her head. ‘He’s not. I’ve bumped into him a couple of times when he’s been back visiting his parents. He’s still Rob.’
Claire hadn’t told me she’d seen him.
‘If Rob wants to be a mermaid still, then he can be,’ I say airily. ‘It makes no difference to me.’
‘Perhaps we should try to have a little get-together Friday night, then?’ Eddie suggests. ‘Nice and early so that Claire can get her beauty sleep. We’ll have to catch up with Suzy at the wedding. How exciting.’ He lifts his glass of juice in a toast. ‘The mermaids all back together again. Just like the old days!’