Chapter 9
The smell of delicious, unhealthy food while sitting at the restaurant drive-thru had been borderline tortuous, and as I took my food out of the bag, I fought not to become outright feral and tear into it.
My appetite was becoming rather insatiable lately, but it was a nice welcome after a lot of nausea in my first trimester. I also began noticing a slight uptick in my craving for animal blood and meat, particularly rare-cooked steak. Until I got pregnant, I preferred any and all meat cooked well-done. Not anymore. Well, except for hamburgers.
I bit into my Big Mac, savoring its flavor and smells. I chewed slowly, leaning back in my seat, sauce dripping down my hands. Thankfully, I remembered to put some napkins on my lap. Sonny got extra, plus some of those little individual wet wipes.
“Good?” Sonny asked, parking the SUV. He didn’t want anything at McDonald’s?. His loss. While he was giving me a look, I could see he wanted to laugh at my mess. I nodded, taking another bite.
“Mhmm,” I answered.
He set the soda he was sipping on into his cup holder. “How’s your food?” he asked Katrina, looking in the rearview mirror.
Katrina was sitting in the backseat of Sonny’s Escalade, eating the chicken nuggets that came with her Happy Meal?. He bought her chocolate milk to drink. It made her day. “Good! But they need to give kids more chicken nuggets. They’re cheap.” Sonny and I laughed, watching the people coming in and out of the establishment.
Taking a sip of my soda, I dug into the fries, nearly moaning in delight. I decided on a lemonade to drink. My son was a fan of my choice for lunch too, kicking me as I ate. He tended to kick and move more when I ate certain foods. Rare meat being another of his favorites.
“Lulu, can we go to the playground after we go shopping?”
“Maybe,” I said. “It all depends on when we’re done.” Truthfully, it depended on how I felt after we finished with the thrift store. If my back and/or feet hurt too badly, then I would have Sonny bring me home, and then, he could go take her to play.
“Okay,” she said, sad with my answer. It broke my heart when I had to tell her no, but that was my own guilt that I had to overcome. “Apple?”
I looked at the back seat to see Katrina offering me one of the fruits’ slices that came with her meal. Smiling, I said, “No, thank you.”
She put the apple slice in her mouth, talking with her mouth full, shrugging her shoulders. “Suit yourself.”
Laughing, I went back to attacking my burger.
* * *
“Do they have Barbies here?” Katrina asked me. “I want some new ones.”
I held her hand on our way to the entrance to Consign Hive thrift store. Sonny walked behind us, staying close. I honestly didn’t mind having a personal bodyguard every time I went out. Whoever it was on each trip would linger but would give me enough space so their presence wasn’t smothering.
“I’m not sure,” I told Katrina. “It depends on if anyone donated some.” I looked down at her and smiled. “But we’ll see.”
“Okay! I hope they do. Katie needs more friends. She does and Stephanie does and so does Jessica. Samantha has enough friends.”
It was cute to me that she named each of her dolls and gave them the personalities she did when playing with them.
The crowd was on the lighter side today here at Consign Hive. I preferred it that way; it made it easier to browse without others practically breathing down my neck.
I had always enjoyed thrifting. It was a nice way to relax. I wanted to visit our local shop today to hopefully find more pajamas and browse the men’s section for more baggy T-shirts and basketball shorts. Comfort was a necessity during this pregnancy. I would’ve borrowed Dominic’s shirts, but my belly was getting too big for them.
“Hello,” greeted the female employee, a friendly smile on her face. She was in the middle of putting away clothes.
“Hi!” Katrina replied.
“Is there anything in particular you’re looking for today?”
I shook my head. “Just browsing.”
“Barbies!” Katrina excitedly answered, garnering a chuckle from the employee.
“I think we have some, actually.” She pointed in the direction of where the toys were, looking at me. “Around that corner, you’ll find the toys. If you need anything, don’t hesitate to ask.”
“Thank you,” I said.
She carried on with her task.
“Can I go look at the toys, Lulu? Please?”
“Would you mind taking her over there?” I asked Sonny. “I want to go check out the men’s section and see what they have.”
Sonny’s expression screamed that he wasn’t keen on leaving me to browse any part of this store alone, but it wouldn’t be for long, and then I would be back in eyesight.
“I don’t think?—”
“Please, Sonny. How would Dominic know?”
An awkward silence hung in the air for a moment, and then, Sonny heaved a defeated breath.
“Alright but meet us over at the toys as soon as you’re done. Not a moment later.”
“I promise.”
He stared at me for an extra second before he reached for Katrina’s hand and took her to go search the children’s toys. I knew he meant well, but browsing men’s clothes in here by myself wasn’t dangerous. It wasn’t like he would get in trouble for it. I’d grab clothing I liked and headed straight for the toys. This place, small in square footage, had the vibe of a mom ‘n’ pop shop with locals as their employees and volunteers. Consign Hive was safe.
My favorite thing about this place was how well organized it was. Some bigger thrift stores I’d been to looked like a tornado ripped through them.
I nodded in greeting at an elderly woman as we crossed paths. Using a walker for support, she had to at least be in her 80s. She saw my belly and looked back up at me.
“So beautiful,” she said, her smile infectious.
“Thank you.”
I slowed my pace, checking out the shelves of books along my way, rubbing my belly. My son kicked at my touch. I couldn’t wait to meet him. I couldn’t believe how blessed I was. He had so much love waiting for him.
Aimlessly, I wandered the area where the men’s clothing section was, taking my time and enjoying the moment. The sense of peace. Seeing the section for blankets and bed sheets, I spotted baby blankets. Thumbing through the stack, I chose a basic yellow blanket, a blue one, and two zoo animal themed ones. There was baby bedding, but I wanted to order those brand new, and I was undecided on the theme for my son’s bedroom. I had been holding off on shopping for his bedroom until I made a choice.
Blankets on my arm, I came up on the men’s clothing section, finding the size range I needed. The bell attached above the door sounded as someone entered the store. I wondered how the employees dealt with that bell on busy days. That would drive me nuts.
I huffed, annoyed with the selection of shirts. But as quickly as my annoyance appeared, it disappeared when a new, nearby lingering scent made the hairs on the back of my neck stand on end. Turning my head, I spotted a tall man—around or at six feet—wearing a brown trench coat and a baseball cap. A man. His head was down, the cap hiding his eyes as he headed my way.
Thanks to when I was homeless, picking up on someone’s vibe had become fairly easy. Add in the training I’d received with the family and my encounters with Fabio and Vincent, and every alarm in my head was blaring. I didn’t like it. My heart began to beat faster. I gripped my phone tighter in my hand, cradling my belly in the other as I focused again on the men’s clothes, pretending to search the bottom rack with all the pants and shorts on it. Dominic’s advice suddenly came to mind.
Keep your head down, eyes up.
The stranger entered the men’s area, one hand in his coat pocket, his knuckles peeking out of its other sleeve. Like he was holding something. A gun? No, that would be too bulky. He was clearly in no hurry, lightly brushing against me as he passed by. I froze at the feel of something cold and sharp against my arm.
“Sorry,” he mumbled under his breath.
This section was crowded by the racks of clothes but not that crowded. He brushed against me on purpose. He had a weapon. A knife maybe? Not wanting to cause any kind of scene and scare Katrina, I remained calm and felt his presence draw further away until we were on opposite ends of the section.
No noise. No talking. Just silence.
I didn’t dare look behind me. I turned down the volume on my phone and then opened up my messages, sending a text to Sonny.
I need you NOW. Don’t scare Katrina. Man here w/ a weapon alert!!!
Staring at my belly, I regretted not waiting for Katrina to finish what she wanted before coming over here without Sonny. If it had come to it, I would’ve thrown hands with this guy to protect me and my son, even if it meant getting hurt. I wasn’t sure what agenda the stranger had. Was he a creeper? A socially awkward man? Some kind of criminal? I snuck a peek to my right, and there was Sonny, holding Katrina, his strides great and brisk on his way across the shop. He waved for me to come to him. Feigning frustration at the clothes, I sighed and flicked a random shirt on my way out of that section.
“Are you ready to go?” Sonny asked.
“Hell yes.”
He set Katrina down next to me and stepped closer, talking in my ear. “In there?” I nodded. He took a step back and reached inside the front of his suit jacket, handing me the keys to his Escalade before opening his wallet. “Lock the doors.” He passed me his credit card.
“Understood.” I patted the crown of Katrina’s head, smiling at her for reassurance. “Let’s go pay for our stuff. Sound good?”
“Okay, Lulu.” I took firm hold of her hand and walked us back toward the checkout desk. Sonny was already in the men’s clothing section before I could make my first step past him. “They had Barbies, Lulu!”
“How many did you get?” Seeing her collection in her arms, I’d say she raided the doll selection fairly well.
“A lot.”
Amused, I shook my head, reaching the checkout.
After the cashier thanked us for shopping there, I told her to have a good day and walked me and Katrina out of the shop. Even though the air was cold, it was a relief. I breathed in deep, exhaling as I pressed the button to unlock the SUV’s doors. I helped Katrina into the backseat and buckled her in, shutting her door. Sonny fell into view through the shop windows after I rounded the back of the Escalade.
Hand on the handle of the passenger door, I gave Sonny a thumb’s up. He nodded once.
We got in the SUV and buckled up. Sonny started the engine. After we backed out of the parking lot, I helped Katrina retrieve her leftovers from her Happy Meal?, and then, I leaned against my seat, my head against the headrest, taking another deep breath to collect myself. Katrina was safe. Sonny was safe, and so were me and my son. I put my hands on my belly, calming down further with each kick and movement.
Though I was thankful nothing happened with that stranger, everything could’ve gone in the opposite direction so fucking fast. From now on, I planned to take my purse with me wherever I went, bringing my .22 with me. Maybe a knife or pepper spray, too.
Who was he? Was he a local? Was it just coincidental timing, or was that planned? Was he going to hurt me? Would Dominic let me leave the fucking house again or keep me on a ball and chain for the rest of my life? Fuck.
I stared at the ceiling, tired. Tired physically and tired of being on guard. “Who was that, Sonny?”
“Still figuring that out.”
“Did he say anything?”
“Lulu? Can we still go to the playground? It’s not dark yet, and I want to sit on the swings! I want to try to jump farther. My stupid shoe messed me up last time—stupid laces. I want Velcro! Those won’t make me mess up.”
The playground. Damn it! I covered my face, groaning. I forgot. Fucking pregnancy fog! Fucking asshole who had to ruin this fucking day! Tears sprung to my eyes. I should’ve stuck with Sonny and Katrina. He was right on being hesitant to let me wander the shop alone, and I fucking hated it. Being in this life, dating a mafia don brought with it its own set of risks, and having his child cemented me in this life. I loved it most of the time and having that second chance away from poverty and insecurity, but this business also carried with it its own insecurity. What if that stranger hurt me? What if he tried to kill me? My son?
A shaky breath escaped me. When I broke down, bursting into tears, Sonny placed his hand on my shoulder, trying to comfort me.
“The playground will have to be another day,” Sonny informed Katrina. “We’ll talk about it when we get home.”
“Is that why Lulu’s crying?”
There was a pause like Sonny searched for the words.
“We feel bad, but we need to get home. There’s always another day.”
I cried harder at that, the guilt massive. Her afternoon was ruined, and it was my fault. If I had listened…
“Please don’t be sad, Lulu. Like Uncle Sonny said, we can go another day. We don’t have to go to the playground today, as long as I can spend time with you.”
Wiping my eyes, I looked at her, reaching behind me, holding out my hand for her to hold. Reaching forward, she grabbed it. Katrina was an amazing kid. She was right; we’d spend more time together once we got home. I smiled, thinking about us playing with her new dolls, maybe putting on one of her favorite movies and snuggling, munching on popcorn.
“I love you,” I told her.
“I love you, too, Lulu.”