Chapter 31
“Tell me again about the first time you spoke to the boy?” Iza’s words pull me from my lingering thoughts.
Ever since I left Karius in his study, my mind has been stuck on what he did and everything he said after.
A strange feeling keeps twisting inside of me, and I don’t know whether it’s normal.
I have spent the last year of my life killing vampires to keep my sister alive.
But the idea that someone would kill someone simply because they hurt me is leaving me with feelings I can’t explain.
I’ve always been the protector. I can take care of myself and everyone around me.
I’ve never been the one being protected, and deep down, I think I might like it. Maybe I even need it.
Vincent wasn’t a threat to our bond. What he did happened so long ago that I hadn’t even thought about it until I saw him again at the welcoming meal.
And how on earth did Karius know that he was the one who had burned me?
The questions swirl in my mind, and I’m ashamed to say that with them, Karius is firmly at the center of every thought.
“Adina.” I jump at the sound of my name. My eyes find Iza’s blue orbs on me, worry marring her beautiful features. “Are you ok? You seem distracted.”
Now that is an understatement. She has the shadow prince on her mind, my dear.
Stay out of my thoughts!
“Yes, I’m fine, sorry. What were you saying?”
I scoot forward on my chair, leaning against the makeshift desk in her room.
The others still don’t think that it’s safe to return to the library, given what happened, and I hate to admit that I agree.
If the impures can really hide in plain sight, then it makes it next to impossible to trust even a single human that we come into contact with.
Julian could be controlling any of them.
He could be using them to spy on us. Until we know how to handle him, we’ll have to start taking precautions.
Iza had the brilliant idea of Finn creating a similar mixture to the one he made for Willow, but one that can be ingested rather than the drops that Willow had to put in her eyes.
She’s had the kitchen staff slipping it into every meal the humans consume, but I’m afraid Finn can’t keep up with the demands of how much is needed.
“I need you to tell me word for word what the impure said to you the first time you saw him.”
I nod, but I can’t deny that the whole thing freaked me out, and I’ve spent every day since trying to forget about it.
I still sometimes have flashes of his voice as he trapped me in Karius’s brother’s old room.
There was something otherworldly about him, something that made me feel strange.
Yet, there was an odd part of me that also wanted to feel it again.
To unpick it and understand what it all means.
“I don’t remember it all. It was like he was speaking in riddles, mostly. He said something about me being exactly where I was supposed to be.”
She nods, scribbling notes on a small pad. I try to think back, but memories of Karius finding me that day keep intruding—how he pressed my hands to the wall above my head, his breath brushing my lips. Focus.
“He said something about tasting the essence of home.”
Her head snaps up at my words, and her eyes widen.
“What?” I ask.
She jumps from her chair and races over to where she has a stack of library books piled beside her bed.
“I need to find something,” she mumbles as she throws books down, getting deeper into the pile.
I watch in silence as she finally finds the one she is looking for, opening it and flicking through pages as she makes her way back toward me.
“Here. I’ve got it.”
“What?”
She hands me the book, pointing to where she was reading. I lay it down in front of me, my eyes scanning the short passage.
Many no longer believe in the gods, and the loss of such beliefs has allowed the demons that once walked amongst us to become mere myths, too.
People no longer fear the monsters of the past, but they are still among us.
They may not be able to create from the earth like the gods, but they can distort that which is already made, infecting things with their very essence.
I look up at Iza. “So, you think that these things are infecting people? I thought it was magic?”
She shakes her head, and I can see the excitement in her eyes.
“In a way, yes, but it’s more than that. Demons cannot create like the gods, so they imbue or infect what is already existing with their soul, or essence, as this book calls it.”
“Like a possession?” It’s a word I’ve heard the oldbloods use when talking about the vampires. They think that they are possessed by demons.
“Kind of yes, but more than that. You see, the gods created life, and demons are the opposite of that. A demon cannot create life for itself, so instead it steals it.”
“So, the impures are already dead?” I ask.
She nods. “Yes. I believe that once the full transition has been made, then the essence of the demon has fully taken over and the life that resided there before has gone.”
“That’s why the boy said that they were all one because they all derive from the same source. They are just broken pieces of the same thing that share the same life and the same mind. So, killing the demon that the gods imprisoned would kill them all.”
“Yes.”
“So, the impures are nothing more than puppets.” I breathe.
“Exactly.”
“Then Willow…” My words trail off, too afraid to say what I’m thinking out loud.
“She may not have made the full transition yet. I believe that this Julian you mentioned is awakening the impure when he needs to. And whatever Finn was giving you for Willow was stopping that transition from being able to fully take place. It kept her alive. Kept her human.”
“But he has her. What if it’s too late?”
She shakes her head. “He still wants something from you, Adina. There is every chance that she is still herself. We can still find her, and once Finn has found a way to fully stop the transition, she will be ok.”
A sliver of hope returns.
“I think we’re close to figuring this thing out.
If Finn can truly make this stuff, then we could prevent another war and save your sister.
Julian obviously began awakening the impures a year ago because he’s close to finding their master’s prison.
If he’s here, then we’re close too. We will beat him. ”
She looks up at me, her eyes hopeful. And I know that she truly means every word, I only hope that she’s right.
During training this morning, Piper invited me to dinner.
I was about to say no until I saw the look in her eyes, and I gave in.
And now I’m sitting at a dinner table across from Ajax and Ivana, who are speaking in their own silent way as we wait for Piper to bring out her famous stew that she has cooked.
Ivana tries to keep her face straight as Ajax tells another joke, and I’m honestly kind of glad to see him smiling.
Since his mother’s arrival at the palace, he hasn’t been his usual self, always seeming just a little on edge.
I can only imagine what it was like for him and Kaia growing up in a house with that woman.
“I haven’t actually thanked you for the other night.” The voice is quiet and comes from Iza, who is sitting beside me. I turn to face her, and her eyes shift nervously as she pushes her glasses up the bridge of her nose.
“For what?” I ask.
“With Hira. It was brave to stand up for me like that. Incredibly stupid but very brave.”
A smile touches my lips at her words.
“You don’t need to thank me, Iza. Nobody deserves to be spoken to in the way that you were. It was the right thing to do.”
A small smile tilts her lips upwards as she looks up at me through her thick rims. Her shoulders relax as I offer a smile back.
“I know that vampires have been awful to you, and so I just appreciate it.”
I go to answer her, but I honestly don’t know what to say.
She’s right—they have been awful to me, but never her, Piper, or Ajax.
Even Ivana, as serious as she is, has never been cruel.
It almost makes me question whether I have been right all these years.
Were all the vampires that I killed been Vincents, or did I kill a couple of Pipers too?
My stomach drops at the thought, and I shift in my seat.
“Are you ok?”
Worry mars her face as she looks up at me.
“Karius and I had a little disagreement, and we haven’t really spoken since.
” It’s the first thing I can think of other than the truth of my dark thoughts.
It’s not a lie, though. He hasn't spoken to me since I ran away from his study. He hasn’t been sleeping in his room either, which, for some reason, makes anger bubble inside my veins.
“I’m sure the two of you will be fine. I know you may not believe this, but he’s a good person, Adina.”
I roll my eyes, but they lack the edge that they would have had a few weeks ago.
“If you say so.”
She laughs at this, and I’m glad to see a smile back on her face.
“He is. When my powers didn’t manifest, a lot of vampires were very cruel to me.
They shunned me. Even my own father called me defective, but Karius never treated me any differently.
He took care of me and let me live in the castle.
I don’t know many other powerful vampires that would have done the same thing. ”
I take in her words, and I know that they are true.
For all the time I’ve spent trying to hate him, he has never truly been cruel to me, not even after I tried to kill him.
Our lives may be tied together, but he could have still treated me harshly and kept me locked away, but he never did.
And a small part of me whispers that it has nothing to do with the bond.
Her words stir something in me that I don’t want to consider.