29. Kane
Iawoke fifteen minutes ago to the sun shining through the window and a light sheen of sweat coating my skin. I figured it was mid-morning, but without a clock in my bedroom, I wasn’t sure.
I rolled onto my back and caught sight of Kate’s sleeping form to my left. It was then that I saw the difference: her hair black and shiny with life, her skin tone a bit warmer with an unmistakable resemblance to Elijah in her features.
Watching her made me realize all the worry sitting heavily on my chest over having not found her was gone. The panic I’ve lived with since losing her and my wolf wasn’t so desperate anymore. I could breathe easier.
Apprehension still lingered. Detachment from my wolf was still growing between us, and having not shifted in over a week was taking a toll on my body and my mental state. A shifter without his animal can’t survive, but I shoved that thought out of my head and climbed out of bed.
I showered, trimmed and cleaned up my beard, brushed my teeth, took a piss, and then pulled on a clean pair of jeans. I didn’t wake Kate. A part of me too afraid to face her just yet after what I did, while the other needed to ensure she got as much rest as she and her wolf needed.
Leaving the bedroom, I ease the door closed as quietly as possible and pad my bare feet down the hallway, hearing the voices that woke me up to begin with and itching to slam my fist into my beta’s mouth for defying my orders.
Motherfucker.
Stopping where the hallway turns into the living room with the kitchen to my left, I take in the sight of them all in. Trez is asleep, his massive body stretched out on the couch with an arm flung over his face, covering his eyes to block the light. Jagger is perched on a stool at the island, his back to his mate while facing Ashleigh. She’s sitting crisscrossed on the counter along the back wall next to where the kitchen sink is center of the window.
“Ahem,” I say, clearing my throat to gain Jag’s attention despite them knowing I’m here. With our hearing capabilities, it’s impossible not to have heard my movements. After a beat, his spine straightens, and then he lets out a prolonged breath before his neck rolls and his amused stare finds mine. “Are you for real?”
I cross my arms over my bare chest while pinning Jagger with a hard stare, my eyes flashing orange to drive my point.
“I thought we agreed not to tell anyone until Kate was ready?”
“I’m not anyone, stupid,” Ashleigh huffs as her eyes roll on their own accord. Her legs unfold, then she slips off the counter, her booted feet making a thud against the hardwood floor. “Besides, you tell me everything anyway.”
Her attitude over the past week is beyond grating on my nerves. She was pissed after she learned how I treated Kate and the threat I vowed. She had every right to be angry. Kate’s her friend too, but I let shit slide with her that I wouldn’t ordinarily despite her being one of my closest friends. I’m her alpha, and it stops now.
I took responsibility for what I did and made it known to the whole pack days ago when I told everyone that Kate and Trez were our missing wolves. Ashleigh had found out the night it went down, but my speech seemed to piss her off again, and every day that passes, she gets bolder with her childish name-calling.
The only person’s opinion of me I give a damn about is currently sleeping in my bed. To her, I have a lot to make up for. To my cousin, she can kiss my hairy, wolf ass, but she will still show me respect, especially when she’s in my house.
My glowing eyes snap to hers, but unlike when my gaze was locked with Jagger, I pour my alpha power into her whole being, forcing her to feel my strength and almost surprised at how recharged I am.
My stare paralyzes her in place. She can’t shift. She can’t speak, she can barely breathe air into her lungs.
Stepping between the refrigerator and the island, I slowly walk toward her, and with every step, I add just a little bit more power into my hold on her and her wolf. Ashleigh’s wolf has already rolled onto her back, submitting and showing me her belly. My cousin, on the other hand, is fighting it. I’d be surprised if she weren’t.
I stop when I’m four feet from her and re-cross my arms, knowing she’ll tire out before I do.
“Was wondering how long you were going to put up with that bullshit?” Jagger comments nonchalantly, then he picks up a can of soda before bringing it to his lips and tipping his head back to swallow the contents like this is an everyday occurrence.
It’s not.
It certainly isn’t something I take pleasure in, but it’s also something I can’t continue to let slide.
Ashleigh’s knees wobble, and then her eyes lose focus, fluttering rapidly. She grits her teeth, fighting the inevitable. After sucking in a breath through her mouth, her knees buckle and slam against the floor. Closing her eyes, she tilts her head and bears her neck in submission.
Jagger stands and leans forward, peering over the side.
“For the record,” he says, his head cocking to the side, “we don’t tell you everything.”
“Stand,” I command as I release my hold, making it her choice to do as I say or not, and hoping she chooses right because I hate this fucking part of being the alpha.
After waiting with bated breath, she jumps to her feet, her hands down by her sides.
“Are you done with your bullshit?” I ask. “Acting like you’re twelve again is beneath you.”
Her tongue clucks at my remark, and she folds her arms over her chest. “I’m allowed to be mad at you, Kane.”
“You are, cousin, and by all means, if you have something you still need to get off your chest, do it now and do it here. I’m done with your attitude in front of the pack.” I step back. Turning, I give her my backside while walking to the refrigerator, continuing our conversation. “It’s pissing me off, and it’s giving everyone mixed signals. We have to be a united front.”
Opening the fridge, I find it stocked with meats already thawed, and I know without asking it was Jagger who took the frozen venison and elk out of the freezer, knowing I’d want to feed Kate.
Thanks, I tell him through our mind link as I grab two vacuumed sealed packs of meat. He responds the same way, but Ashleigh’s raised voice drowns out his thoughts.
“Just because I think you’re a dick for rejecting your mate doesn’t mean I don’t have your back.”
I slam the refrigerator door closed so hard that the stainless steel machine jolts, slamming against the wall behind it. I whip around to face her, the bag of meat at my side, while my free hand lifts and points at her. “I did not reject my mate. Do not ever insinuate that I did.”
“But you kind of… actually did,” she argues, her snarky words biting as they hit every nerve ending in my body.
Using more energy than it should require, I force my claws to extend from my empty hand and use the one on my index finger to slice through the plastic wrapped around the meat. I turn my back on her, facing the stove, so I’m not tempted to force her into submission again.
“He didn’t know she was Anna. None of us did,” Jag interjects. “Until you find your mate, stay out of that discussion. You have no fucking idea what you’re even talking about.”
I sit the raw meat on the counter with it still inside the bag while I pull out a cast iron skillet and turn the biggest burner on the gas stove on to high to heat the pan.
“I know that when… if I find my mate, I’d never forgive him if he did anything remotely close to what Kane did.”
Pins and needles prick my skin as the sensation climbs my back until it feels like someone took a sharp blade and jabbed it into the base of my skull.
I turn on my heel, but when I’m about to open my mouth, the front door of the cabin swings open. Even annoyed with Ashleigh, I should have heard her approach, but then again, Annalise has always been a more silent predator than others in the pack.
The smell of freshly baked cookies hits me before her scent follows. My stomach growls, recognizing her delicious-smelling cookies.
“Who pissed off our alpha?” Her fingers clutch the white platter, giving away her nervousness that her steady voice doesn’t show. Being the wife of the pack’s former beta for so long, she’s perfected how to mask her feelings. It doesn’t work on me despite her trying to erect a wall between us.
Forcing my gaze back on Ashleigh, I say, “Mine and Kate’s business is between me and Kate. You’ve stated your opinion. I don’t want to hear it again. Go do a perimeter check, then make sure every member of our warrior group is fight-ready. Up everyone’s training. Also, see if any recruits want to join the team. They still need to be adults and willing.”
“Jagger and Trez already ran the perimeter this morning,” she says, her arms crossing. “My team is always fight-ready. Don’t insinuate that we aren’t. Besides, there has been no intel that The Marked Crest pack plans to invade our territory.”
“Now isn’t the time to question me. Do as you’re told and get the fuck out of my sight.” When she doesn’t move, I growl and bark, “Now,” at her.
Without a word, she turns and leaves, not even acknowledging Annalise or grabbing a cookie on her way out the door.
“Do you really think we’ll go to war with them again?” Annalise closes the door and then walks over, stopping next to her son and placing the tray on the island.
I turn back to the stove as Jagger snatches a cookie and shoves it into his mouth. Smoke filters up into the vent hood, telling me the pan is hot enough for the meat. Grabbing a set of tongs from the utensil canister, I pull the elk from the bag and place it in the skillet as I try to answer her question to the best of my ability.
“I’ve had much time to think since we discovered Kate and Trez were our stolen pups. Everhart wouldn’t have allowed them to get close to us, let alone visit yearly. He had a reason, but I haven’t the first clue as to what that reason is or why. We need to be prepared if they come looking for a war.”
I turn around to face them, my eyes landing on my beta.
“I didn’t tell her either.” His tongue clucks in annoyance. “But… she’s a mom. She’s psychic. She knew Kate was here yesterday.”
“I’m not psychic, son. You’re just complete shit at keeping secrets and telling lies.”
“Yesterday?” I question, knowing it would have been late or even early morning when we returned.
“You and Kate have been out for a day and a half. It’s almost noon.”
“What must a guy do to get some sleep around here?” Trez remarks as he pulls himself into a seated position behind Annalise and his mate. Standing, he runs a hand through his dirty blond hair.
It’s still bizaare getting used to him looking so much like our dad. Even spending nearly a week with him when we were searching for Kate wasn’t enough to not be taken aback every time I look at him.
It makes me wonder if it’s going to be strange getting used to seeing Kate with black hair and blue eyes. It’s such a contrast from how I once thought she looked like Richard Everhart with her matching blond hair and gray eyes.
“Maybe try sleeping in your own bed and not on my couch,” I say as I flip the meat to cook the other side.
“Hard to do when my bed is in Canada,” he says, and for a split second, I contemplate if he said what he said to get a rise out of Jagger because if so, it worked.
A deep growl rumbles from my beta’s throat so loud the stainless-steel tongs rattle against the cast iron skillet.
“Can you stop pissing me off?” Jagger’s head swings toward his mate, his jaw firm and his eyes heated.
“Can you both take it to another room in another house?” I follow. “If Kate wasn’t awake before, she is now.”
Sure, I wanted her to wake up, but I wanted the smell of the food I’m preparing for her to do the job for me, not Jagger’s over-possessive bullshit.
“Better yet,” I say to Jagger, “go make sure we’re stocked on all the essentials. We don’t need to only be ready for a fight, we need to make sure everyone has plenty of food and water. Take your mate with you.”
“Gladly.” He chirps up, a smirk seeming to form slowly on his lips before his whispered words in my head make me turn away from them annoyed. If he hates my bed so much, we’ll see how he likes it on the hay in the barn.
Leave,I growl out as I pull the meat from the pan.
“Let’s go, mate,” Jagger grits out, obviously hurt by Trez’s comment.
As I wrap the elk in aluminum foil to keep it warm, it hits me that Trez’s comment irritated me too. His bed will never again be in Marked Crest territory.
Make sure my little brother understands he’ll never see that bed again.
I was planning on it. Once I’m done with his ass, he’ll never want to leave my bed.
The latter wasn’t needed.
“I’m going to take one of these,” Jag says to Annalise as I twist back around and cross my arms over my chest.
“Did you forget how to count? That’s three,” she scolds.
“I’m a growing wolf.” He shrugs his shoulders.
“You’re twenty-eight,” she deadpans, arching an eyebrow while pursing her lips.
“My mate isn’t, and he needs all the extra energy he can get for what I have planned.” He lifts his arm and pops one full piece inside his mouth, a smirk firmly in place on his smug face.
“The only thing I’m going to do is find another bed.”
Looks like you’re bunking in the lodge tonight,I comment to my best friend, and with the look my brother throws my way, he knows I’m having a silent conversation with his mate.
“Plenty of beds for you to choose from in the lodge. Knock yourself out—after you help your beta,” I say. “That’s an order.”
Don’t bet on it. Jagger chuckles, likely figuring out the cause of the sour look on Trez’s face. My bed is his bed, and his ass will be in it even if I have to pin him down to keep him there.
Good luck with that.
Keep all the luck for yourself, Kane. You need it where my sister is concerned.
Get the fuck out already.
Jagger tosses one of the cookies in the air to his mate, then jerks his head to the door before stepping toward it. Trez snatches it mid-air, making it disappear into his mouth as he follows his mate out.
Once the door is closed, I train my eyes on Annalise. She hasn’t moved from the spot next to where Jagger had been seated. She isn’t sitting on the stool but rather standing behind it with her forearms resting on the stone counter.
“You’re quiet,” I state my observation.
I did want them gone, and if I’m honest, I want Jagger’s mom to leave too, just not before I do what needs to be done. A shifter’s alpha can alleviate most of their emotional pain, grief, and even depression. A mate, on the other hand, can pull some or all of it into them, giving their fated mate total relief.
“Jagger told me she almost ran.” She isn’t looking at me. Her head is bent, her eyes on the tray. “That if you hadn’t used up all your gifted power, she likely wouldn’t be here.”
“Annalise, come here.”
The base of my skull tingles as I pull on the power within. Every time I use it, the area behind my earlobe tickles and a dull ache forms at my temples. It’s not exactly a fun experience, which is why I only do it when it’s truly needed.
When she doesn’t move, I walk to her. When I’m close enough to touch her, I extend my arm and wrap my hand around her bare skin just above her elbow, then I pull her into a hug, wrapping my arms around her while she closes hers around my waist.
“Thank you for bringing her home, Kane.”
If I hadn’t fucked up, Kate would’ve already been here, but I don’t say that. This isn’t about my guilt, and at this point, I’m done owning up to my wrongdoing to anyone other than my mate.
“Look at me,” I coax, forcing my tone softer and void of my alpha power. I want her to comply with her own free will. It’s what comes next that requires the gift my alpha abilities give me.
Pulling back, my hands slip to her shoulders. Her head tips back and her blue eyes halt on my glowing gaze. I pour my energy into her, but this differs from how I used it on Kate.
“Kane, you don’t?—”
“Shh,” I whisper, sinking my claws into the muscle behind her shoulders. I can pull her emotions to me without drawing blood, but doing it this way is the quickest. “Let me take it from you.”
I’m not hurting her. She’s a beast, the same as me. We have a high tolerance for physical pain.
She doesn’t fight me, and almost immediately, years of feeling like a failure as a mother shoots through my veins like acid, burning my insides. Her worry over not knowing if her daughter was being mistreated or if she was scared. Despair, longing, and heartbreak of just missing her pup.
Each emotion feels and tastes different as it courses through me. The pain that Annalise was carrying around was far worse than any of my own. The amount of depression inside her makes me regret not doing this sooner. It raises questions I want answers to.
“Why hasn’t my father ever taken any of your pain away? Why hasn’t Eli?” I growl, angrier now that I see so much relief wash over her face, the stress lines gone, her eyes clearer, her anguish tamed.
Seeing Annalise once again looking the way I remember her from when I was a small child pisses me off more toward my dad than when he made the assumption he was going to become alpha again and that I was going to step down like the boy he apparently still sees me as.
Fuck that.
He doesn’t take care of my wolves like I do.
“They were different leaders than how you and my son run the pack.” She shakes her head lightly. “That doesn’t mean Dante wasn’t a good alpha, Kane, or that Elijah wasn’t the beta the pack needed then. You and Jagger are just better and right, and that has everything to do with the way the four of us raised you boys. You saw what worked and what didn’t and adjusted your ways. I know you didn’t know him, but you’re more like your grandfather than you are Dante. He used to do this too. He was compassionate but fierce, like you. When he thought someone was sad, he’d siphon those emotions from them. He was a great man and the best alpha. So are you. I hope you know that.”
She takes a deep breath, pulling air in through her mouth and exhaling the same way.
“It feels so good to breathe again. To feel like me again.”
“I’m sorry I can’t take it all, but trust me, I’m going to have a word with your mate.”
It’s probably a good thing I can’t shift because I’m not wholly sure I could hold back from ripping him apart. Annalise is like a second mother to me. She and Eli are fully bonded, so unlike Kate and me, he can feel every emotion that goes through her like it’s his own. The least he could have done was shoulder some of it even if he was feeling some of the same things she was, and I know he was.
I can’t imagine waking up and your child no longer being where you tucked them in to sleep the night before. Losing a mate I hadn’t fully developed feelings for was hard enough.
“That’s not needed, Kane, but I appreciate the thought.”
I’m about to tell her I don’t give a shit if she does or doesn’t want me to say something to Eli when we both freeze while looking at each other.
A low growl with lethal promise sends a chill down my spine.
My eyes flick over Annalise to find the most beautiful, solid black wolf I’ve ever seen staring back at me, her teeth bared and the front of her body crouched, ready for attack.
Fuck, she’s gorgeous.