Chapter 8 Sage
SAGE
TWENTY YEARS OLD—JULY
Summer Before Junior Year
Living with Aspen in the sorority house sophomore year was amazing.
At this point I can’t imagine us not living together.
I’m so glad her family is letting me stay with them again this summer, and that I was invited back for another year of interning with the same lab.
Getting to be a part of this plant genome project is a dream come true; it doesn’t even feel like work.
Aspen’s parents have her doing a lot of campaign-related volunteering and events this summer, so she isn’t working. I have my own guest room next to hers, but even when we’re in separate rooms, it seems too far away after the last two years of sharing much smaller spaces.
I’m used to getting up early for my internship, so even on the weekends, I’m usually awake before Aspen.
Today is no exception. Maybe I can go get some best friend cuddles in before she needs to get up for the day.
I quietly make my way next door, knocking softly before opening it when there’s no answer.
But when I make my way over to Aspen’s bed, it's empty. My gut twists like it always does when she stays out all night. It doesn’t happen often, but there were nights when I was with Ryan or when we got separated at a party, and she would text me that she would see me at home or in the morning.
I always hate it.
I hate not knowing where she is or who she’s with.
I know Aspen is independent; she’s an adult and she doesn’t need me at her side every hour of the day, but that doesn’t prevent me from worrying about her.
Even when she comes back, and I know she’s alright, it doesn’t stop the twisting in my gut.
I know it isn’t rational and Aspen deserves whatever privacy she wants, but I hate not knowing.
I’ve tried to open up to her about my own exploits, hoping that she would reciprocate, but whenever I mention something that Ryan and I have done, she quickly changes the subject.
I was a little surprised at first; between all the lingerie and the nipple piercings, I wasn’t expecting Aspen to be so shy about sex, but I shouldn’t have assumed.
Just because I would be happy to share every detail of my life with her doesn’t mean she owes me the same.
I decide to try to get some more sleep. It’s too early to call Ryan for company, so I might as well wait in Aspen’s bed for her to return.
Ryan seemed a little disappointed when I explained I was planning to spend the summer in Georgia.
He knows I always feel a little out of place with my parents and siblings.
He’d hoped we’d both stay on campus and be near each other, but after I explained the research I’d be doing, he was supportive.
Plus months away from Aspen to stay on campus doesn’t sound fun.
“Am I in the wrong room?” Aspen’s voice jolts me awake, so I must have drifted off. “I know I didn’t get much sleep, but I’m fairly certain this is my bed, Goldilocks,” she teases, joining me under the covers and tugging a strand of my blonde hair.
I snuggle in, wrapping an arm and leg around her as I rest my head on her shoulder. “So were you with Arthur?” I whisper, unable to help myself.
She laughs. “No, why would I be with Arthur?”
“I thought maybe you spent the night with him. I keep waiting for you two to get together,” I admit. “Even your parents think you two would make a great couple.”
“Yeah, that’s not happening.” She laughs again.
“So you two have really never hooked up?” I ask, unable to hide the disbelief in my tone. They’re both really attractive, and they spend so much time together. It seems inevitable that they would have at least experimented when they were younger.
“Never,” she assures me confidently.
I’ve gone to some of the events Aspen’s parents have insisted she attend.
She spends the whole time smiling for the cameras and for the people around her, and then afterward, her and Arthur complain about how much they hated everyone who was there.
I’ve never heard her mention an ex or even friends from high school. So who the hell is she hooking up with?
“Are you a virgin?” I blurt out as the thought crosses my mind. Is that why she’s always gotten so quiet and is so quick to change the subject when I talk about sex?
“What? No. A minute ago you thought I was sleeping with Arthur and now you think I’m a virgin?” she asks with a laugh.
“Well, you just never talk about…”
“I’m definitely not a virgin. We also don’t need to talk about it,” she rushes to say.
“Sorry, I wasn’t trying to pry,” I apologize, feeling guilty that I pushed when I know she’s been private in the past after staying out all night.
“Don’t apologize, sweetie,” she reassures me, hugging me tighter to her. “If there’s ever anyone important, you’ll be the first to know,” she promises with a kiss to the top of my head.
“Thank you,” I whisper. I have an awful thought that I hope she doesn’t find someone soon, because I don’t want to give up my time with her, but I try to ignore that jealous voice.
She’s my best friend, I want her to be happy.
She was supportive when Ryan and I got together.
I still spend plenty of time with her, I’m sure it would be the same if she were in a relationship.
“I’m going to try to get some sleep before my dad’s campaign event tonight. Do you want to stay here?” she asks with a yawn.
I smile, wiggling a bit to get comfortable. “There’s nowhere else I’d rather be.”