Chapter 14 Adrian #2
“Second, I have no idea when the ideal time to apply for adoption is, but I would agree that owning a home would probably make you a stronger candidate than someone crashing with their friend.” Okay, responsible supportive comments out of the way.
Question time. “But back up, Hudson. Did you say we would change? As in you and me? I thought I was just giving ideas today. If you do end up buying it, this would be your home to turn into whatever you want.”
Hudson flashes me his biggest, most charismatic smile, managing to plead with his eyes before he even opens his mouth.
“Come on, Charming, you know how much I love your design taste. The whole tour you were full of ideas for adding character and making everything more functional for kids. I know you’re really busy, but would you be able to help me turn this house into the dream home you were describing? Pretty please.”
Is he serious?
That’s kind of a lot of pressure. Not to mention how bittersweet it will be when I’ve been fantasizing about this exact scenario with the dream version of him that wants me romantically.
Although… working with his money instead of my much smaller budget would be really fun. And can I actually say no to him? “Well, I was just saying what I would do, but yeah, I can help you pick things that you would like.”
He walks over so he’s standing right in front of me again.
“I liked every suggestion you said, and you know I’m obsessed with the way your place looks.
If you make it anything like that, I know I’ll love it.
But thinking about having to make every one of those decisions is kind of overwhelming.
” Then he reaches out to hold my hand as he looks right into my eyes.
What the fuck is happening. “I know I’m asking a lot of you, and I’ll obviously help if you want me to, but I’d love to not have to make every little decision.
I trust you, Adrian.” He gives my hand a little squeeze, and I suddenly can’t remember how to breathe.
“You’re the best at this stuff, Charming.
Can you pretty please help me do it? I promise I’ll make it worth your time. ”
He’s batting his eyelashes and smirking as he holds my hand. God, does he have any idea how suggestive that sounded? Or how hot he is?
I take a step back, forcing him to drop his hold. “Oh my god. Stop making it sound like you’re offering me sexual favors,” I scold with a laugh. “My body doesn’t understand that the hot straight man isn’t interested in me when you say things like that.”
Okay, that might have been too honest. But he should know how he sounds right now. It isn’t fair. I’m expecting him to look embarrassed, or maybe concerned at what I’m implying, but just like before with apparently not caring what his realtor thinks, he doesn’t. If anything he looks… smug, maybe?
His smile only grows as he gives me a once-over. “Well, how are you so sure I’m not? I really want your help here.”
What the actual fuck? Being okay with someone assuming we’re together is one thing, but that comment was something else entirely. Hudson has jokingly flirted with me before, but that went much farther than anything he’s said in the past.
Obviously he’s still joking though. Maybe he has said things like that and it just feels like more because of where we are and everything we’ve been talking about.
He hasn’t suddenly decided after weeks of living together that now is the time for him to make an actual move.
We were literally just talking about rumors, and he didn’t say they could actually be true.
He didn’t deny it when I called him straight.
“Okay, okay. No need for the cheesy porn script,” I tease, playing along with his tone. “You already know I’ll help. You’re basically asking me to design my dream home without worrying about it being my money I’m spending. I can’t think of anything better.”
“I can think of a few things,” he says, and then he fucking winks. He’s looking at me the same way I look at chocolate, and he needs to drop this joke before I drop to my knees.
Gathering all my strength, I chuckle awkwardly, and I know my cheeks are heating but there’s nothing I can do about that. There’s only so much of his pretend flirting that I can take. I need to move on before I really embarrass myself.
“So, are you going to put in an offer?”
His smile returns to his normally cheerful one, far less suggestive than moments ago.
I miss that look. But I know it wasn’t real.
And if it isn’t real, I don’t want to see it from him.
Someday I’ll find someone who actually wants me.
Not someone who’s asking me to help them do something or to fix a problem they have.
I have to believe it’ll happen even though a huge part of me doubts anyone will ever see me that way.
But I really hope it does—that I’ll tour a fancy house with them, and we can really buy it together for our future family.
But I know that person isn’t Hudson.
And as much as I do think we’ve become friends, if I wasn’t offering him a media-free place to live, if I wasn’t going to help him design this house, I’m not sure I’d have him in my life at all.
So this casual cheerfulness is better. Real. Normal.
Normal is good.
“Yeah, I’ll go talk to Jason.”