CHAPTER TWO
“KEEP THIS SAFE for me,” the beautiful masked woman had said as she’d cut a lock of her hair from her head and folded it within the safety of a handkerchief. And then she’d kissed him after tucking the handkerchief into his pocket. “Until we find each other in the real world.”
Edward Beaumont sighed as he carefully opened the soft white fabric to reveal a lock of her brown hair, perfectly preserved within her offering, a declaration of…something more.
It was all he dared to call it. The feeling felt like love. Like the first blossoms on a beautiful spring morning. But he knew better. Because the Edward who had fought off her ghosts and kissed her senseless? That man was strong and fearless, and he only existed rather infrequently, much to his dismay.
The reality of his life was much more…dismal.
Unable to part with the small piece of his mystery woman, he tucked the handkerchief into his pocket and attempted to sit up after nearly an entire week of being bedridden.
His head spun. His heart beat too fast. Dizziness all too quickly tried to claim him. He took several moments to breathe deeply to dispel the dizziness shrouding his mind and the weakness plaguing his body. The world finally stilled. But it was little comfort when all he wanted was to scour the entire city of Edilann to find the woman whose name he didn’t even know.
The lock on the outside of his bedroom door jangled, keys clinking together on the opposite side, before the door opened, and his personal servant Cedric—or nanny as Edward liked to call him—barged inside with a bowl of hot broth resting on top of a silver platter. And beside the bowl…
Cedric’s thick brown brows furrowed as he shook up the vial filled with yellow, translucent liquid and handed it to him. Edward didn’t reach for it. He hated it. It did nothing to help the episodes.
“You must take your tonic,” Cedric insisted. “It’s for your own good.”
“As is locking me up in this infuriating tower?”
The other man heaved a sigh as he sat at the foot of the bed, still holding out the tonic with a patient hand. “You snuck out less than a fortnight ago, and you are still recovering from its ill-effects. Of course, your sister would lock you in until you fully recover.”
Edward smacked Cedric’s hand. The vial flew out of his fingers and smashed into the ground in a puddle of glass and yellowish liquid. But his nanny only shook his head and produced another from inside his coat pocket.
“ I am the lord of this house!” Edward bellowed, fighting through the dizziness in his head as he pushed himself to his feet. “I will not be caged in like some sort of… animal! ”
But then his body swayed as he fought against the dizziness. Cedric patiently helped him sit back on the bed and squeezed his shoulders.
“Of course you are, Your Lordship.” Cedric dipped his head in respect. “And your subjects need you to be well. Your sister is only trying to help.”
Unable to help himself, he snorted as he finally resigned himself to throwing back the tonic, grimacing at the bitter flavor. “She’s only trying to help herself. If she can keep me away from society, then I have no chance to marry. If I don’t marry, I won’t produce an heir. If I don’t produce an heir, her son will take my place after I die.”
Cedric frowned as he placed the bowl of broth at his bedside table. “You are able to go out plenty often enough.”
“To see my friends,” Edward pointed out dryly. “Who are all male .”
“What is this really about?”
A despondent sigh escaped him as his gaze traveled toward the window, the first rays of morning filtering through the warped glass. Even the glass caged him in, keeping him from the real world when he so desperately wanted to be a part of it.
“I met a woman. And I can’t stay in here, wasting away when I need to find her.” He quirked his mouth to the side as he returned his attention to Cedric. “I apologize for smacking you. I am frustrated with Clara. You are not to blame.”
“I know how much you dislike the tonic. But the physician said it should help.”
“Yet, it doesn’t.”
“It just needs time.”
“It’s been years, Cedric. If it hasn’t gotten better by now, it never will.”
The man didn’t refute him.
“Where is Clara this morning?” he asked, allowing Cedric to help get him dressed. He most often did the task himself, but some days it proved difficult.
“Calling on a few friends, Your Lordship.”
He nodded, hatching a plan in his head. Clara didn’t leave the estate often enough. Today was his only chance at escape. “I’d like to go on a walk.” When his servant started to protest, Edward quickly cut in. “Just a short walk. I think getting fresh air might do me good over being cooped up in this tower.”
Despite his dizziness and heavy chest, he climbed down the stairs of his tower with Cedric following only a few steps behind. When they exited the estate, he inhaled a deep breath of fresh air, taking in his surroundings.
Pine trees lined most of the property, giving it an isolated, woodsy feel. A dirt path led to a private lake where he liked to enjoy the quiet solitude of fishing—or rather, Cedric’s quiet companionship. Another dirt path led around the property large enough for a carriage to traverse for a leisurely drive.
Although the main city of Edilann was close, he felt snug in his little nook near the mountainside.
The transition of warm air to cold brushed along his face, signaling the turn of the next season. Autumn splashed a variety of colors from red to yellow to orange across the beautiful mountain canvas before him.
This place…
It brought him peace in an otherwise confusing world filled with loneliness and heartache. But perhaps he wouldn’t be so lonely if…if he could find her .
With Cedric at his side, they traversed a small dirt path leading to the stables, and a wave of relief washed over him when the scents of horse and hay greeted him as he entered. His horse, Walnut, snorted upon seeing him, prancing back and forth in her stall as he approached with an apple in his hand. In only two bites, the mare gobbled it up and stuck her face through a gap in the wood, sniffing him in search of more food.
“I’ll give you more later,” he promised as he stroked the gentle creature’s velvety nose.
He glanced over his shoulder to find Cedric tending to his own horse—a gift given to him as per the agreement of his work contract with the family. And thankfully, the horse occupied his attention long enough for Edmund to quietly ask the stable boy to saddle his horse, as he hadn’t the strength to do so on his own today.
But the moment Cedric glanced in his direction, he frowned, following him out of the stable as he led Walnut by the reins.
“Where are you going?” the other man asked, following close at his heels as Edward led the mare away from the barn.
“I have to go find her, Cedric.”
“You cannot leave the estate. Don’t you remember what happened when you journeyed to Avorstead?”
He frowned as he recalled the time months ago when he and his friends took the week-long trip to Avorstead in the kingdom of Leonia and back to locate another mutual friend named Barnaby. The man had lost his memories and had been staying with a family of sisters, at least until they’d retrieved him and brought him back home. Barnaby had ended up marrying one of those women and was now living happily in Edilann, his memories intact, with his wife, Ivette.
“I was with my friends. I was fine.”
“ Was, ” Cedric emphasized, now falling into step beside him. “You were bedridden for two weeks after the fact.”
He released a disgruntled huff and turned his shoulder toward the man. Unfortunately, Cedric wasn’t done speaking.
“And where do you suppose you’ll start looking? Hmm?” He ticked off on his fingers. “You don’t even know her name. Where she lives. Who her family is. The places she frequents.” The man sighed when Edward continued forward as if he hadn’t spoken at all. “At least take a carriage.”
“My sister would never allow it.”
Oh, he loved his sister. But after the death of their parents on a voyage across the sea years ago, she was far too protective for her own good.
Placing his foot into the stirrup, he swung his leg up and over the saddle. The quick movement caused his head to spin, and he focused on taking deep breaths until his surroundings stilled once more.
“Just… wait .” Cedric sighed again and gestured toward the stables. “I’ll escort you into town.”
Edward scoffed. “I’m not so fragile as that.”
In fact, the thought irked him that his sister forced someone to remain in his company at all times.
Without waiting for the other man to mount up, Edward turned his horse toward the dirt path leading over the ground of the estate and kicked the creature’s flanks.
The horse started into a trot, and then its gait smoothed into a gallop. Wind tore at his black hair, the strands flitting over his forehead and eyes. He brushed it out of his face before holding on tighter to the reins.
The crisp yellow and orange terrain flew past in a whir of motion. Fallen leaves crunched beneath the horse’s hooves. The scent of death and decay wafted past his nose, making drawing air difficult.
His head spun. His heart squeezed and jumped, flipped and flopped. He felt his pulse ricocheting within his veins, spurting faster and faster until it stole the breath from him entirely.
No! he internally shouted at himself. I am strong enough to do this simple task.
But even as he slowed his mount to a trot to try to regain some of his breath, his head felt light and dizzy. His heart squeezed painfully, stealing the remaining air from his lungs. He tried to dismount when black dots shrouded his vision. But his lightheadedness won. And rather than dismounting smoothly from a moving horse, he ungracefully lost control of his limbs, tipped precariously to the side, and landed with a painful heap on a bed of grass and dirt.
He gasped for air, but the breath struggled through his lungs, making the fight for consciousness difficult when his lungs spasmed and his heart raced.
“Edward!” Cedric’s voice floated far away. “Edward!”
He clawed at the grass, trying to get himself into a sitting position. He nearly gave up when a pair of strong arms lifted him enough to help him sit, and they kept him upright even as each shallow breath struggled in and out of his body.
“Stay with me,” Cedric ordered in a terse tone. “Slow breaths. There you go. That’s it.”
Although his breathing still came quickly, his heart calmed, and the shadows in his eyes slowly dissipated until finally, he gained enough control of his lungs to take unhurried breaths.
Edward exhaled a long sigh and slumped exhaustedly against his servant. “I’m sorry,” he murmured. It was all he had strength enough to say.
“Your sister will want to know—”
“Tell her and you’re fired.” The threat sounded weak at best, especially when no force lay behind it.
“You have no jurisdiction over whether I keep my job, Eddie. I have your best interests at heart.” The man patted his shoulder. “The doctor will want to see you again.”
“No.” He struggled to sit by himself when his body was plagued by weakness. “I need to find her.”
“And you shall. Just not like this.”
With an aching chest and bleary eyes, he gazed toward the path leading into the city. If he hadn’t found her by now…he feared it might somehow be too late.