25
EVEN AS HE knocked on the door of his mother’s house before he let himself in, Leifur wondered whether it was a good idea to bring Astrid with him.
Although she didn’t mind if Peta thought she was on the verge of gaining a daughter-in-law, he still had the feeling that he was more invested in their relationship than Astrid.
She said all the right things, and he had stopped trying to keep himself from falling in love with her because it was too late for that.
He still didn’t believe that she was going to stay here for him, whatever she said.
It was one thing for him to be heartbroken if she left, but he wasn’t sure he could cope with his mother knowing quite how hard he’d fallen for Astrid.
Peta would be heartbroken for him, and it would be difficult to hold himself together in the face of her sympathy.
As it was, he’d been right to be wary because his brother was there. As soon as he saw Isak, he knew it would not be good. If his brother was here on a Monday morning, it meant he’d lost his job.
‘Hey, Leifur,’ said Isak. ‘Who’s your friend?’ He got up from the table looking far too keen to meet Astrid.
‘This is Astrid,’ Leifur said.
‘Astrid! It’s lovely to see you again,’ said Peta, coming over and hugging her as if they’d known each other for years. ‘And you too, Leifur.’
‘Hey, Mamma.’ He hugged his mother. ‘Astrid, this is my brother, Isak.’
‘Great to meet you,’ Isak said, hugging her.
Leifur clenched his fists. Peta noticed and put a calming hand on his arm, shooting him a meaningful look at the same time. The split-second glance said to him, calm down, you don’t need to worry; you know what your brother’s like.
‘Coffee and cake for you both? I made a Skúffukaka ,’ she said.
‘Ooh, lovely, thank you,’ said Astrid.
He nodded to his mother. She knew he loved the rich chocolate cake.
‘Day off?’ Isak asked.
‘Yes, our first day off since we started,’ Astrid said brightly.
If only he’d known Isak would be here, he could have warned Astrid.
‘Day off for you as well, is it?’ Leifur asked his brother, unable to resist.
‘I’ve been laid off,’ Isak said as if it was nothing of concern.
‘Oh no,’ Astrid said. ‘That’s awful.’
‘Isak was wondering whether you have any jobs going on the boat,’ Peta asked.
‘No, I’m sorry.’ He wasn’t sorry at all.
The last thing he wanted was to involve his brother in his new start.
It was one thing when he was running the family business, because Isak was family and that had given him some protection, but the fact was he was a shirker who never took responsibility for anything, and he wasn’t about to subject his new business partner and the wider company to that.
He’d seen how hard everyone worked, and Isak would let him down.
‘There’s only me and Astrid on the boat. ’
‘You run that boat with just the two of you?’ Isak said .
‘Well, we have Eva to help, but that’s more for guest comfort,’ said Astrid.
‘I told Isak that it had only been the two of you on the trial run, and I thought you could probably do with another pair of hands,’ Peta said, looking innocently at Leifur.
‘It isn’t up to me,’ Leifur said. ‘Jonas does all the hiring.’
‘But you could put a word in for your brother,’ said Peta.
Leifur sighed. Hadn’t he already said they didn’t need anybody? ‘Okay, sure.’
Peta clapped her hands together. ‘Wonderful. Come on, sit down and let’s eat this cake.’
Being around Isak put Leifur in a bad mood, and his spirits didn’t rise even after he and Astrid had left Peta’s house and were walking back to his.
‘I enjoyed that,’ Astrid said. ‘Your brother seems like fun.’
That was it exactly. Isak was the fun one, and whenever he and Leifur were in the same room together, Isak won everyone over, leaving Leifur looking like the boring sensible brother.
Even Astrid thought Isak was fun. What else could she think without knowing what he was really like behind his happy-go-lucky exterior?
And it felt too late to explain to her. Anything he said now would sound as if he were being childish.
‘Hey, Leifur.’ She tucked her hand into his elbow since he had his hands in his pockets.
‘Sorry. Yeah, I suppose he is.’
‘You two don’t get along?’
‘Not really.’
‘So I’m guessing you’re not planning to put a word in for him with Jonas?’
‘No.’
‘Right.’
‘You think that’s bad?’ Because it suddenly seemed worse that Astrid might think badly of him than anything Isak could do.
‘No. I mean, I don’t know him, but he seemed perfectly nice, and keen to work with you.’
He sighed. ‘I think it was my mother more than Isak. I’m not sure he actually asked.’
‘You’re right,’ she said. ‘I hadn’t even noticed, but yes, it was your mother.’
That little chink of light, of realisation by Astrid that things hadn’t played out how she thought, gave Leifur the opportunity he needed.
‘That’s how it is with Isak. He charms people, especially our mother, into helping him get what he wants. He makes no effort, takes no responsibility and yet somehow manages to be everyone’s favourite person.’
‘You’re my favourite person.’
He looked down at her and smiled, although he still felt down in the dumps. ‘Thanks.’
‘And you don’t have to do anything about helping him out if you don’t want to. We genuinely don’t have a job for him on the boat, so even if you wanted to say that you had spoken to Jonas for him, you can be pretty certain the answer would be no.’
He took his hand out of his pocket and reached for Astrid’s hand. ‘I’m sorry. He brings out the worst in me.’
‘I have an idea. Let’s head back to town and go out. We can have an early night out and be back at mine in time for a decent night’s sleep.’
That sounded good. He needed to blow off some steam, and besides, he hadn’t taken Astrid out anywhere yet, and it was as good a time as any to start now.
‘Okay. Early dinner and a couple of drinks?’
‘Do you have anywhere in mind?’
‘I have the perfect place,’ he said.
Kaffivagninn was on the far side of the harbour and was supposedly the oldest restaurant in Reykjavik, housed in an unassuming wooden building with the name in lights across the roof and a large wooden terrace that overlooked the sea.
It had been renovated during the past few months and looked more modern and perhaps more inviting than it had done before, but it still held all the nostalgia that Leifur remembered, and he loved it.
He’d eaten there with his father and brother and their crew many times when they’d dropped off their catch in Reykjavik.
If it had been a good day, his father would treat them all to fish and chips before they headed home.
‘I always thought this place was just for fishermen,’ said Astrid.
‘It used to be years ago, but every time I come here there are more tourists than the time before. I guess that’s why they renovated it.’
They sat at a table for two next to the windows that overlooked the sea. They each ordered a beer and fish and chips.
‘ Skál ,’ she said. ‘To us.’
‘To us. Skál .’
‘Do you think your brother can find a job on another fishing boat?’
Leifur had been hoping that Isak could be left behind for the rest of the day, but he didn’t want to be short with Astrid and refuse to talk about it. Anyway, he got the feeling that she was on his side, which made him feel less defensive.
‘He could.’
‘What do you think happened?’
‘I expect he got too comfortable and thought he could get away without pulling his weight.’
‘That’s the voice of experience.’
‘I wish I was closer to him, honestly. I wish we had what you and Gudrun have, something more like a friendship but I realised a long time ago it wasn’t going to be like that between us. It was hard to come to terms with, and I’m not sure our mother will ever accept it, but that’s how it is.’
It hurt that Isak didn’t seem to place any value on the concept of being a family. He kept in touch with their mother, popped in every so often, usually when he wanted food or money, and Leifur was grateful for that for Peta’s sake.
‘Was it hard being his boss?’
‘It was impossible.’
‘Because he was angry that you had the company, and he didn’t?’
‘It was just as much his as it was mine. He could have been captain of Brimfaxi , but he didn’t want to be.
It wasn’t anything to do with me being the oldest. I was the one who carried everything on after our father died, and Isak dropped in and out when it suited him.
When he needed money. If it’d been anyone else, I would have fired them, but Mamma is very good at pleading his case, so I gave him a hundred second chances. ’
‘And I understand why you can’t do that anymore. Aside from it being heartbreaking to give someone chance after chance when all they do is take advantage of your good nature, you worked hard to make this happen with Jonas and you don’t want to jeopardise that.’
Leifur felt a lump in his throat and took a slug of his beer to clear it.
He coughed and looked out of the window, willing his eyes to dry up before he had to look at Astrid again.
No one had ever understood the relationship he had with Isak.
But Astrid did. She’d listened to his version of how things are with his brother rather than taking Isak on face value. And it meant everything to him.
He reached across the table for Astrid’s hand. How incredible was it that she had his back?
‘Thank you for being on my side. ’
She smiled, the warmth in her face making the lump in his throat threaten to return again.
‘It’s the best side, Leifur, and you don’t need to wonder whether I’m there. I always will be.’
He couldn’t let himself believe that she actually meant always. It was easy to say, but they weren’t there yet. Talking about Isak, something he’d never done with anyone before, helped him feel confident about sticking to his guns and not helping Isak get a job at Iceland Adventures.
‘I’m not going to help Isak get a job, but I could talk to some fishing friends who might have something. If I don’t help, it feels as if I’m letting my mother down.’
‘That’s a good idea. He needs a job, and it doesn’t have to be with you.’
Their fish and chips arrived, and Leifur realised how hungry he was. They hadn’t eaten anything except a couple of pieces of toast and the cake at his mother’s.
‘Oh god, this fish is incredible,’ said Astrid. ‘I want to savour it but also shove it in as fast as I can, I’m so hungry.’
Leifur laughed, feeling lighter and finally able to shake the day off. ‘I think we should go for ice cream after.’
‘Oh, can we go to Valdis, the pink place back along the harbour?’
‘Sure. I’ve had the odd rye bread ice cream from there. It’s good.’
‘Rye bread ice cream?’
‘Don’t knock it until you’ve tried it.’
‘I’ll have some of yours. I’m a salted caramel girl.’
After the ice cream, or half an ice cream, since Astrid liked the rye bread flavour so much she ate most of his, they wandered back into town in search of somewhere to have a beer before heading back to her apartment.
‘Hey! Astrid!’
Gudrun was on the other side of the street. She crossed over and gave Astrid a hug, smiling at Leifur over her sister’s shoulder.
‘I haven’t seen you for ages. How’re the tours going? Olafur said they’ve been full.’
‘It’s been brilliant so far,’ Astrid said, taking his hand. Gudrun clocked it straight away, and shot her sister a look he couldn’t quite understand the meaning of.
‘Great. So, will you both come for dinner tomorrow night? We’re never going to see you otherwise.’
Astrid looked at him, and he smiled, letting her know it was fine with him.
‘Okay, we’re on,’ said Gudrun. ‘See you tomorrow. Is seven too early?’
‘Eight is better,’ he said. ‘We won’t be back until seven, and we need to prep for the next day.’
‘To save us having to get up too early,’ Astrid explained.
‘Right…’ Gudrun gave them a wicked smile, and Astrid rolled her eyes and laughed.
‘See you tomorrow.’