Chapter 17 #3
So he'd gone off to meet with some other creches, and I'd finished dealing with some account settlements from our provisioners and suppliers before digging back into my perennial language lessons and taking a short detour to a gym around the corner I'd found that was fine, I guess.
At least I could use a private room and avoid the smiling, simpering trainers, even if the holo opponents I queued up never threw me to the ground with the same vigour as Tam did. Now, though –
I wandered back to our bedroom, nerves making my stomach roil a little.
It might be dangerous, I knew that, but I could be smart about it.
Elethenn and I had gone down to see Tam a couple of times and we'd been fine.
And getting more intel had to be good. I'd tried everything else.
Sometimes, you just had to shake a tree until…
something fell off. A pine cone? A piece of fruit?
I still wasn't sure how that all worked.
I chewed on my cheek, made up my mind, and shot a quick note to Elethenn asking if he wanted to join me at Tam's for fight night.
While I waited for his response, I took some time to flick through the options in the closet, settling an an older dancing outfit – although I pulled on one of Araxis's jackets to wear over top.
My trunk sat in one corner, small; everything I'd owned before joining Creche Thiel was inside.
And while I knew I was headed down with Elethenn and that it was pretty safe, I still clicked open the lid , reached in, and grabbed my swords.
I'd just hauled the sheath over my shoulders and padded into the hygiene room when a reply from Elethenn flashed up. You're travelling to Radiant Ward?
Tam says he has some useful information re: the people who jumped me, I wrote back. Also, I miss dancing.
Have you spoken with Araxis?
And, look, we were reconciled, mostly anyway.
We didn't have a contract. It was just the two of us, Araxis and Sashen, figuring it out – but contract or not, he wasn't my handler and he didn't need to know every single thing I did in order to give me permission.
In fact, he'd told me I could always assume I had his permission and support.
I leaned close to the mirror, adding a little glitter powder to my eyelids while I considered my response. I could lie. Elethenn wouldn't know. But –
Fuck, I was sick and tired of lying.
I'll write to him on the way, I said. Listen, I haven't been to my apartment in more than two weeks. My plants are probably dead! When in doubt, crack a joke. It usually worked for me anyway.
The reply was a long time coming. Or not: it might have just felt like that, like I was waiting on Elethenn to rat me out to my – my whoever. My sinnenthi. Sashen, you do not have any plants. Perhaps they were stolen, and I did not notice.
Quick!, I wrote back, Check Vivith's room! Then, I promise I'll write on the way, but I'm going to go no matter what and I'd rather you went with me. And Tam asked me specifically if you'd come along. So…
It took only a few short moments before there was a rapping at the door to our bedroom.
When I slid it open, I wasn't surprised to find Elethenn standing there, looking perilously close to being annoyed.
"Fight nights bring out a crowd," I started before he could open his mouth, "and a crowd means guards.
And while I personally think they're all bastards, it's not like someone's going to jump me when I am literally surrounded by brawny pit fighters and also ward guards.
And I'm armed. And we can take an inter-ward shuttle, if you'd be happier about that.
You're good at security stuff. That all seems reasonable, right? "
Elethenn's arms crossed hard against his chest as he stared at me, skeptical. "It would be reasonable if you were to stay here. I could go on my own."
"Araxis said it's best if we travel in pairs," I insisted. "Which is why I'm being good and asking you to come with me. He even told you that I can defend myself, remember?"
For a long moment, Elethenn stared at me – he might not have been able to see out of the white eye, but it still felt like he could use it to peer into my soul – before letting out a long, deep, and exhausted sigh.
"We will take a shuttle," he said. "And you'll write to Araxis now, and we'll confirm that he agrees with your course of action before we go. "
We weren't going to do that. "I'll book the shuttle," I said, smiling as I flashed up my interface and confirmed the booking with a few taps. "We might as well start walking to the transit station. Araxis will get back to us right away."
"Sashen –" he started.
"Don't fight me," I said. "I'm incredibly stubborn."
"Yes, I am aware," he continued. "I was merely going to ask –" I pushed past him into the hall as he trailed behind me. "I – I do not intend to be rude, but… Ah, yes, I see. It must be."
"What must be?"
"That is what you are wearing. I – Yes, I see. You – hm."
"Oh, do I look different?" I asked mildly.
And to be fair, these days I was either wearing gym gear, lounge clothes, or conservative abayan formal wear for meetings.
Sometimes I threw in a lumpy sweater to mix things up; more recently, I'd been living in the sweater Araxis had given me.
In this outfit – tight pants that pinched me right at the narrowest part of my waist; a sheer top that glinted and cut away to startling diamonds of flesh while little beads winked at regular intervals – I looked like Sashen Solar again, confident and in command.
Except maybe a bit more feral, like I'd gotten a taste for blood and I was hungry for more, although, admittedly, most of the blood I'd tasted was my own.
I'd always known this person was in there somewhere.
It's why I'd considered pit fighting back on Yellow Fin, before things went horribly wrong on me.
I turned and looked at Elethenn as he took in this particular outfit, and I could actually see him put himself back together, trying to regain some composure that I'd rattled.
Like tonight, for the first time, he could feel a sliver of my power.
Like tonight, maybe he could finally see what it was that everyone else saw in me.
I'd bet actual credits that he thought I looked hot.
I barely kept myself from preening. "I told you I could loan you something," I said, smug. "Just wait until the jacket comes off." And then I winked – which was probably lost on him – and pushed my way through the front door and into Verdant Ward beyond.
On the way, I opened up the pink message chain I shared with Araxis.
I'll be out for a bit tonight, I wrote. Elethenn is with me.
Headed to see Tam in Radiant Ward; big fight night there (with dancing!).
And then, using the drawing interface, I doodled a heart and an X for him.
The crossed lines are a kiss, just so you know, I added.
More symbols that don't make much sense.
Hope you've made it through your meetings without biting through your tongue!
That would be a waste of an absolutely perfect tongue.
I pointedly angled the projected interface toward Elethenn so that he could see I'd sent the message as promised, even if I flashed it away before he could read what I'd said.
He didn't look any happier, and I saw his hand brush the side of his hip every now and again, like he was checking something.
And of course he was: he was probably armed.
Well, good. Now I was really sure nothing bad would happen.
We crawled into the inter-ward shuttle, which hurtled into the cluttered space around Sozamia Station before queuing us up for docking in Radiant.
I watched my wristband interface restlessly, torn between hoping for a response and dreading one – would Araxis tell me to head home, that I was being stupid, or would he indulge me, trusting that I could take care of myself?
– but none was forthcoming. I eventually tapped the display off, trying not to feel too disappointed.
The guards at the checkpoint were a bit difficult, taking objectively too long to inspect our credentials.
Then again, any time spent around guards was too long.
When they finally cleared us and we headed into Radiant Ward, I sighed loudly and reached up high over my head to stretch out my shoulders.
Between our meetings, travelling the whole of Sozamia, language lessons, and the quick reports I was still compiling for Perseus and then sending from public dataports when I had a moment, I'd been sitting so much recently.
Even the sparring sessions Araxis and I had arranged, and the slivers of time I was taking to train on my own, weren't enough to compensate for my new meeting-heavy lifestyle.