Chapter 20
Chapter Twenty
Jackson
With a sense of resignation, I started opening bags of candy and plastic eggs. AJ picked up the bag of coins and peaked inside before scooping a handful out. Most of the crew joined us as we sat around the coffee table, shot the shit, and added to our ever-growing pile of plastic Easter eggs.
AJ had inched closer to me so someone else could share the couch, and it was all I could do to keep from touching him. I may have failed once or twice, putting my hand between us and resting it on the cushion, letting my pinky brush against his thigh. I felt like a teenager holding hands for the first time in a darkened movie theater.
AJ had been so patient with me, and we’d been together for almost two months at that point. I knew he hated sneaking around, and I was beginning to hate it too. It was time for us to come out of the closet. But first, we had to get through Family Fun Day with his family, and I had to get through Easter with mine.
I was back to stuffing eggs, my hands busy and not sneaking touches, when I sensed AJ looking around. He pulled out his phone, the move causing him to lean into me. He was so close I could smell his hair, and all I could think about was him complaining about my “fancy-ass” soaps, since he spent all his time at my place. I couldn’t stop the goofy smile on my face and hoped our colleagues thought it had something to do with throwing a super-fun charity event.
“Bathroom,” AJ mumbled, and he was gone, but he didn’t head for the locker rooms, instead heading down the other side of the building, where there were meeting rooms and a large fire hall.
I received a text shortly thereafter.
Coffee Trainer: Coast is clear. Rm 201.
AJ and I had behaved amazingly well over the past weeks. We might have been all over each other behind the closed doors of my condo, but to the rest of the world, we were back to being best friends, though we talked much more about LGBT+ charities and much less about our sexual escapades than we had done in the past.
So I assumed AJ merely wanted to talk to me in private. Though I couldn’t imagine about what.
Room 201 was one of a few small classrooms down a hallway a floor below our lounge and kitchen area. AJ and I had had a fateful conversation in that very room years before. As I walked down the hall, I could tell the classrooms were empty as each door had a narrow rectangular window in it. I kept walking down the empty hallway until I reached 201. I entered to find AJ in the corner along the wall.
“Aje?”
“Come here,” he growled.
“What’s going on?” I sauntered over, wondering what we needed to talk about in private and why AJ looked like he was in time-out.
“Why are you standing over here?” I said as I arrived in front of him, and we were face-to-face. He grasped my arms rather tightly before he swung us around, manhandling me until I was against the wall.
“No blinds on the fucking door,” he explained.
I responded with an oof as I hit the wall. His grip tightened, and he kissed me quickly, aggressively. We’d learned a lot about each other over the past weeks, and I knew that sometimes AJ was insatiable. He’d reined in that particular emotion so far when we were in public or at work. Well, except for that one night when we were out with the Family Fun Day committee, and he’d dragged me to the bathroom.
But the night before had been so fucking hot. We’d just been sitting there, watching a stupid reality show on TV, both of us zoned out, I thought, simply too lazy to get up and go to bed. Then without warning he’d slumped off the couch and onto his knees in front of me. Without saying a word, he’d brought his hands to my waist, and I lifted up so that he could drag my shorts down and off. Hands on my thighs, he took my flaccid member into his mouth until it was anything but flaccid. A rather loud, rather obnoxious commercial jingle that AJ and I had joked and complained about before came on, and I caught AJ’s eye. He didn’t stop what he was doing, but he smiled around my hard cock, laughter alight in his eyes. I rolled my eyes at the song, but then I caressed his cheek. It was this oddly intimate moment, both because of the filthy act we were engaged in, but also because of our connection, our friendship, our shared laugh over a silly pop-culture moment.
I was thinking about all of those things, not just his hot mouth on my cock, when the commercial came on at the station. Apparently, AJ had remembered too.
He ground into me, then pulled our lips apart like it took effort. “Should I hum the song?” I smirked.
“You should shut the fuck up unless you want to get caught,” he said as he lowered himself to his knees.
“Aje.”
“Shut. The fuck. Up.”
“We shouldn’t.” He unzipped me.
“Uh-huh,” he replied, staring at my dick.
“I …” I hissed as his mouth moved on me. I was half hard this time, thanks to all the shoving and kissing and the excitement of possibly being caught.
AJ had taken to blowing me like it was his life’s work, and I was not complaining. Without preamble, he worked me over, fast and hard. I started to grunt, and he pulled off with a shhh , breathing it onto my oversensitive cock. He was back on me then, taking me as deep as he could, a trick he had been practicing and working up to for the past few weeks. It was a really good trick.
I came down his throat, repeating the phrase don’t scream in my head. As the world reformed around me; I think I might have heard myself whispering it out loud once or twice.
AJ smiled up at me, hands on his thighs, hard-on visible even through our heavy-duty pants, looking mighty proud. I smiled down, then leaned my head back to catch my breath. I opened my eyes to AJ standing in front of me, lips moist and glistening. I kissed him, and there was a drop of cum still in his mouth. His tongue transferred the liquid into my mouth, and we both groaned as I swallowed around him.
It was my turn. I shoved AJ against the wall and unzipped him enough to pull his hard cock out from the material. “I wish I could shove this thing in me right now, but this will have to do.”
I was on my knees, putting all of my practice to work to get him off as quickly as he had me. I should have pulled off to remind him to be quiet because he failed that part fairly spectacularly.
I tucked him back in as we kissed and shared a taste of him. “Stay here,” he said into my lips before stealing one more kiss and heading to the door. He peeked out.
“You first.” He opened the door for me.
I risked one last kiss on my way out, grabbing his ass. “This is fucking mine tonight.”
“Uh-huh,” he articulated again as I slipped out the door and down the hall.
We found time that night for me to keep that promise even though we had to be up early on our day off the next day to set up the park for Family Fun Day.
We arrived together, and I was all set to explain to AJ’s brother and our friends that we had randomly met at the entrance, but no one batted an eye when we arrived at the check-in station together.
“There they are!” Jamie seemed very animated given the ungodly hour of the morning. I told him as much.
“It’s gonna be a great day!” he responded. Here are maps of the layout if you two want to start setting up the tables. Some of your crew already brought the grills over from the fire station. We’ll probably need an extra table over there but two at all the other locations.”
“When’d your brother get so bossy?” I muttered to AJ as we set up tables. As we got closer to the event, AJ joined Jamie at the command center, and a couple of teenagers from the center and I started setting up the food station around the grills.
We were unloading paper products when I looked up and was surprised to see Devon and Josh following behind an older couple. I recognized AJ's father and stepmother, and my heart started to race. I’d met them before, but this felt like a meet-the-parents experience, nonetheless.
As if thinking about his parents summonsed my own, I received a text.
Mom: Easter in Scarsdale.
Not a question but a statement. I ignored it, glad to have the excuse of the day's events to put off my response. I watched as AJ’s family approached the table where AJ and Jamie were clearly joking around. They talked for a minute, AJ taking a bag from Natalie and applying sunscreen to his face and arms. As if he sensed me watching him, he looked up and smiled. AJ’s stepmother looked my way too, then back at her stepson before offering me a smile and a nod.
A little while later, AJ’s father and stepmother were herded past me on the way to one of the stations. They stopped to say hi.
“Dr. Gordon, Dr. Marchetti-Gordon. It’s good to see you again. So nice of you to volunteer today.”
“Always so polite, this one,” AJ’s stepmom said more to her husband than to me. “And we’ve told you before, it’s Natalie and Cliff.”
I nodded and smiled. “Ma’am.” For some reason, calling her Natalie didn’t seem right.
AJ’s voice boomed behind me. “Hay, Nat! Dad! You’re over there.” Then he got closer. “Oh. Right. You guys remember Jackson, yeah?” AJ lifted a hand as if he was going to put his arm around me or pat my back but then thought better of it.
Was AJ anxious? It was adorable but also a little suspicious. That notion was confirmed when Dr. Marchetti-Gordon, Natalie, narrowed her eyes at her stepson.
“We were just saying hi. It’s been a while since you’ve made it to one of our July Fourth parties.”
I smiled while AJ did weird things with his hands, first putting them in his pockets, then holding them clasped together in front of him in a most unnatural fashion.
“You know, I think we worked it the past two years. Hopefully, we’ll have off this year. I really love visiting Hampstead. I think Mom wanted me to go there for my undergrad, but Dad insisted on Yale. I’ll take any excuse to see the view from that campus and your backyard. If we’re off on the Fourth, I’ll drag this guy up there.”
“Excellent. Oh, and AJ, don’t forget Josh’s graduation. I put the date on your calendar. Make sure you get the time off. I want the whole family there.” She was looking at me as if asking me to make sure AJ followed through. I would do anything to be on Natalie Marchetti-Gordon’s good side. She was the glue that held AJ’s family together, and the way things were going, it really felt like I was going to be a part of that family for a long time.
At least, I knew I wanted to be, and that’s what all of a sudden made my mother’s text so important.
I elbowed AJ.
“Graduation. Calendar. Got it!” he replied.
Natalie “Uh-huh’d” him skeptically and looked at me. I nodded my promise to make sure he didn’t forget, and holy shit, how had Natalie made me feel like AJ’s partner without saying a word?
Cliff Gordon finally contributed to the conversation. “Jackson.” He held out a hand, which I shook. “Son.” He took AJ’s next, then he followed his wife to one of the activity tables.
Without looking at AJ, I commented, “You can breathe now.”
“Oh my God, we just got called out by Nat!”
“Yeah, I gleaned that.” We both watched as AJ’s parents got farther away.
“How does she do that?” I just shrugged.
AJ took a deep breath, then went into gossip mode. “So get this.” He turned to me. “Jamie and Devon are dating!”
AJ had shared a little bit about his brother and Devon hooking up but had told me that had all ended when Devon left the city for his last semester of college, in January. “I thought that was over.”
“So did I.” He looked at me adoringly. “I guess sometimes things change.”
I wanted nothing more than to kiss him, but I settled for putting pressure on the small of his back, our eyes conveying everything we couldn’t say. I retracted my hand quickly when I saw Natalie looking our way, a move I realized too late was likely more obvious than if I’d simply kept my hand where it was. I smiled toward AJ’s stepmother, my resolve growing stronger.
“I think Jamie is going to come out to them this weekend, but the Devon thing is definitely still a secret. Josh has no idea,” AJ informed me.
I mimed locking my lips and throwing away the key and reveled in the look on AJ’s face as his focus went to my lips. A quick glance confirmed that Natalie still had her eyes on us.
“Come on, let’s get those grills lit.”
We had fun and joked around most of the day, a couple of the kids from the Burcus Center helping us out. Josh and Devon told the kids that they were both gay, and that seemed to relax them. Part of me hated not sharing my own sexuality with the group.
Soon we were all joking and teasing each other, even Jamie, who’d started out a bit high-strung. I could relate; spending time with AJ out in public was always stressful, and as far as I knew, Jamie and Devon hadn’t seen each other for almost as long as AJ and I had been sneaking around.
Our first lull came hours later, when the Burcus Center director gathered all the kids around and began explaining the rules for the Easter egg hunt. Vera, who had arrived with her aunt to participate in the event, was front and center, taking it all in, her father, aunt, and grandparents off to the side, looking on with pride. I caught AJ taking in the tableau as well, and I knew what I had to do.
I threw a “be right back” to Josh and Devon, who were organizing our dwindling supplies with the help of the teenagers, and worked my way over to the two vehicles that acted as our base of operations. The area was deserted since the focus was on the egg hunt. I tucked behind one of the vehicles and texted AJ.
Probie: Can you meet me by the gray SUV?
Feeling cute, I added an image of a car to the text. Then I waited. Once the sound of children laughing and screaming started, AJ found his way to me. I was leaning on our buddy’s vehicle, staring at the text from my mom.
“What’s wrong?”
“This is stupid,” I started but realized my mistake when AJ’s face turned from lightly concerned to deeply worried. I looked around to confirm we were alone and kissed him.
“Sorry. Let me try that again. I’m ready. To come out. To tell everyone if you want. There’s no reason for us to hide from your parents and …” I nodded to myself in encouragement. “No reason to hide from mine. Not really. I …”
The fucker was kissing me before I could continue, and I let him for a beautiful minute before I pulled back, head tapping the vehicle. I caressed his cheek. “I love you, Alexander Jeremy Gordon, and it’s time everyone knew that.”
“My God, Jax. I love you too.” He looked into my eyes like he was discovering them for the first time. “Okay! Yes. Yes, of course. Listen, I’ve been thinking about this. I mean, do you want to tell your parents first? That’s the big hurdle, right? But we’ve also got to tell the chief and LT.”
“What about your family?”
“Yeah, I think Jamie might want the floor tonight. Besides, I want to tell him first before I announce it to the whole family. Explain why I’ve hidden it from him even after he came out to me.”
“Oh, yeah. That makes sense.”
“Hey, you can come over tonight if you want. To Jamie’s, with my parents and Josh and Devon.” I wanted to, I really did, but what I really wanted, what I finally wanted, was to be there as AJ’s boyfriend.
I kissed AJ again, and we held each other’s waists tight. “Nah,” I said slowly. “This is Jamie’s night, and I don’t want to mess it up by being too obvious. I think your stepmother already suspects, which would just make me more nervous about slipping up. You come home to me later,” I whispered seductively in his ear, “and we’ll devise our own plan for coming out.”
Less seductively, I concluded. “I hadn’t really been thinking about work, but we will have to tell them too. Yuk.”
With laughter in his eyes, AJ kissed my temple. “Come on, let’s finish up with all this family fun so we can go home.” I loved the way he emphasized the word home.
It felt wrong, parting with AJ after the event. He held his niece as I said goodbye to the family. They invited me to brunch the next morning, but I was noncommittal. AJ’s dad, not helpfully, opined, “Brunch is probably too early for a young man with the entire city as his playground.”
I looked at AJ and he at me in amusement, his eyebrows raised high and hidden under his bangs. I turned to say goodbye to the family, catching Natalie’s eye. It was clear she had seen our exchange yet again.
“You’re welcome any time, Jackson, and we will see you up in Hampstead. Soon, I hope.”
“Yes, ma’am.” I walked away, feeling AJ’s eyes on me as I went.
I was restless at home, ready to share my plan with my boyfriend. He started texting me from Jamie’s house. He told me that Jamie came out to everyone, and that it had gone well. No surprise there. I asked AJ if he was sure he didn’t want to come out, too, and he said he would wait, not wanting to interfere with Jamie’s journey, assuring me that we would share our journey soon enough.
When he told me he’d been roped into playing a board game, I figured I had some time on my hands. It was the first time in a long time that AJ and I were spending any downtime apart. I was glad I wasn’t in the way for Jamie’s coming out, but I missed AJ.
I had been sitting in front of the TV, not really watching, while AJ and I chatted via text. But I was restless, so I shut off the TV and made my way to the bedroom. I looked at my bed. AJ and I had been tearing up the sheets for the past two months, finding new ways and learning favorite ways to get each other off. There wasn’t a room in my condo that we hadn’t fooled around in, but we’d been so focused on each other that we had yet to pull out the little toy I’d purchased what felt like a lifetime ago.
Well, I had some time to kill, I decided. My phone chimed. AJ had sent a picture of the game board.
Coffee Trainer: On a team with Josh. Might text you some trivia questions.
I took some time before sending a picture of my own. I had never moved the candles AJ had set out the night we’d first used the bathtub. I moved one to my nightstand then and lit it before stripping and climbing into bed with a towel underneath me. One of the things we had learned over the months was how messy lube was and how neither of us liked to sleep on wet, greasy sheets after we’d made love.
Made love, my mind repeated. Because, yeah, AJ may have offered me a fuck buddy at first, but I couldn’t imagine one thing that we had done that was anything other than making love. Not even standing in a corner of the fire hall could be called fucking, or hooking up, or fooling around. It was all making love with my partner, my boyfriend, my love.
I wanted him home so I could convey all of that to him, and so we could figure out how to tell the whole world, and I wasn’t above playing dirty.
I had chosen the smallest one at the time. A black teardrop with a flanged end and a few vibrating speeds. I worked myself open, something we had become proficient at, though we didn’t always treat it like a job.
I pictured AJ between my legs, those big hands possessively wrapped around my thighs, his eyes alight and heavy at the same time, smiling up at me before diving in. I swirled my finger, wishing it was his tongue.
Stopping for a moment, I awkwardly snapped a photo of my finger at my rim, sharing that with AJ.
Probie: Wish this was your tongue.
A few minutes later, I was lubing up my little toy and working it in. I played with the buttons, relaxing into it. I snapped and sent another photo.
Coffee Trainer: You better fucking wait for me. I’m gonna win this thing and get the hell out of here.
I propped my phone up and responded with another photo that showed a hint of the toy and my dick resting on the crevice of my thigh.
Coffee Trainer: Wait. For. Me.
“Okay,” I said out loud to myself. I can do that , I thought. I shut off the vibrator and cautiously got out of bed, wrapping myself in the towel and returning to the living room. I found a mindless action movie to watch, and AJ texted me a picture of himself standing outside Jamie’s brownstone.
Coffee Trainer: We won.
I'd given AJ a key weeks ago. I had one to his place as well, but we’d mainly stayed at mine. When I heard the key in the door, I muted both my phone and the TV, opened the towel, and spread my legs. I was stroking myself when he stalked toward me.
“Holy fuck, cari?o . I’ve been half hard all night. Look at you.” He gripped his crotch like he’d come that second if he didn’t hold it in.
“AJ? Baby?”
His eyes traveled from my hole up to my face, reluctantly.
He cleared his throat. “Yeah? Yes?”
I slid down a little more, spreading my legs. “I need you to turn it on for me.” It took him a beat, then he dragged the coffee table out of the way, falling between my legs on his knees. I thought about giving him instructions. Instead, I stayed there, splayed before him while he stared.
I flexed my hole, and the toy moved. AJ’s cool hands pressed my inner thighs, spreading me open. He kept one there as the other worked its way inward, fingertips brushing, the sensation driving me wild. I bucked up, a bead of pre-cum forming already, AJ’s fingers at the flange, circling it, brushing my hole.
“Found it.”
“Press and hold, baby. Three, two, one.” I nodded and he let go, the vibrations starting. From his kneeling position, AJ locked eyes with me, mapping my expressions as the toy began its work. He let me ride like that for a few minutes, my hips getting into the action, rocking, seeking. He gently pushed the toy, the flange keeping it safe, but it went a little deeper, and AJ found a rhythm that worked with the vibrations and my hips. We rocked, and AJ watched my face like how I was feeling was the most important thing in the world.
AJ stood and brushed a kiss to my lips. “Don’t stop, cari?o .” He was shedding clothes as he walked away from me, and he returned, fully hard, his dick leading the way, red and angry as he covered it with lube from the pump he carried in his other hand.
“Yes,” I hissed, ready, I thought, for AJ to pull out the toy.
Instead, he asked. “This thing have other speeds?” All I could do was nod. He pressed and pressed again, and the vibrator took on a pulsing pattern. He was hovering over me and stole another quick kiss before he ran his hand up the underside of my dick, up and down so slowly, like he was worshiping it or memorizing the feel of it to map out later. My balls were next, being kneaded and massaged, then lifted and squeezed.
His hands had warmed up since he’d stalked through the door a few minutes earlier, and he took the large warm one that was playing with my balls and spread it underneath, putting pressure on my taint. “I can feel it,” he marveled.
I was so close. “More,” I begged, and he gave the toy another gentle shove with his other hand. It was tickling that spot on the inside, and AJ was putting pressure on it from the outside. I rocked into the sensations, a grunting, incoherent mess.
Eventually my words formed. “Now! Now! You!” I swatted his hand away and reached for the toy myself, tossing it away while it still buzzed. I slid myself down on the couch, my ass hanging off, my legs spread wide.
AJ quickly greased up his cock again, then shoved some lube in me before swinging me around so that one leg hung off the couch. He propped up before me and slid me into position.
“You good?” he asked, and I simply nodded before he shoved into me in one motion. I cried out over his grunt.
“So good. Don’t wait.”
“Won’t last.”
“Me either.”
AJ’s strong legs worked us from his position as he held my one leg over his shoulder and thrusted over and over and over again, no finesse, no melodious breaks, no soft kisses. Just locked eyes and powerful thrusts and rocking hips as we each chased our own pleasure by giving pleasure to each other.
As he was sometimes wont to do, AJ began babbling as he got close. “All fucking night. I’ve been thinking about you all fucking night. All day. Wanted to touch you, to hold you. To play fucking board games with you. Never again, Jax. Never again. We don’t have to be alone ever again.”
His babbling had never been more poignant. I grasped my dick and began to work it, AJ making life-changing promises above me until he cried out my name and holy fuck on repeat. He pulled out in time for one last spurt to land on my busy hand. He continued to hold my leg up, breathing hard and watching until I erupted, arching back before flopping down on the couch. AJ draped his head on my messy torso, and I ran my hands through his too-long sweaty hair as we breathed in harmony. I knew he could feel my chest pounding.
“That was so fucking hot, cari?o .”
“It really was.” I tapped AJ’s shoulder. “Come on, babe. Let’s get cleaned up. I really want to talk to you.”
AJ scooped up the vibrator and shut it off, and I didn’t think I’d ever forget the look in his eyes as he did so.
We were showered up and wrapped up in each other in my bed when AJ agreed to come with me for Easter in Scarsdale.
“We work that morning, cari?o .” He reminded me.
“But we can drive to Scarsdale right after. Or …”
“Or?”
“how do you feel about helicopters?”
We decided AJ would tell Jamie after his family left the following day, and then we’d find a time to visit Hampstead after the Easter holiday.
“I’ll text Jamie and tell him we’re skipping brunch tomorrow. Let him have his rainbow flag day with Dad and Nat before we share our news. I’ll video chat with my mom after we tell your parents and my Dad and Nat.”
“Or I can fly you to London.”
“What?”
“We could go to London if you want. Tell her in person.”
“Jackson, man. You’re so worried your parents are going to think I’m a gold digger, yet I genuinely forgot that you have access to a helicopter and a private plane. I’m not worried about telling Mom. I’m more worried about letting LT know. If they make one of us switch shifts or change stations, I’ll go.”
I sat up. “No! AJ, you’ve been there longer! I can’t ask you …”
“You haven’t asked me a thing. We’ll deal with it when it comes.”
“No, AJ. You chose the station to be near your family. I was just assigned here. I should be the one to go.”
Our voices were animated, though I couldn’t call what we were doing arguing. We were debating loudly when I heard a knock at the door.
“What the fuck time is it? Who could that possibly be?” A glance at my phone showed it was not yet nine p.m. A few notifications had piled up while AJ and I had been busy talking … and other things, but I continued to ignore those.
I threw a bathrobe on, mentally ticking through the list of possible suspects who might be on the other side of my door, worried that something was wrong.
I most definitely did not expect to find my parents there when I opened it.
“Mom! Dad! What are you doing here?”
“It’s nice to see you, too, son,” My dad replied, walking right in. I supposed he felt he had the right to since he technically owned the place. Or the company did or something. I wasn’t really sure. He stopped in the foyer as my mom put a hand on my forearm.
“I know this is a surprise, honey.” My mom kissed my cheek, the door closing behind her. She started to walk forward, but I blocked her way, and we stood in the foyer. “But you didn’t reply to my texts, and we got home early. You’re always asking us to visit Brooklyn.”
I was proud that my mom had managed to say the word Brooklyn without it sounding like a curse.
“And yet you never do, Mom.” My heart pounded as she looked over my shoulder once again. I looked quickly behind me before focusing on my mother again. My father stood, staring at the coffee table, askew in the center of the living room.
“Well, we did want to talk with you. We came home early and need to talk to you about Emily and the future of the company.” I kept my body in front of hers. “The Wyecrests will be with us for Easter Sunday and …”
“Are you really just getting back to the States? Are you hungry? I can throw some clothes on, and we can go grab a bite.”
“We ate. We just want to talk to you. About Emily.”
I stood my ground in the foyer, my pulse thrumming through my body as if it was beating in time to AJ’s in the other room, a proverbial telltale heart. I thought I had another week to prepare before talking to my parents.. And I never imagined I would do it while AJ hid in my bedroom.
“I’ll be home for Easter. Can’t we talk about this then?” It was a challenge to keep desperation out of my voice.
“I just said the Wyecrests will be joining us!” My mom sounded exasperated. “And we all need to be on the same page,” she concluded as she pushed past me to join my father, who was standing in the archway to the living room, staring at my misplaced coffee table.
“Yeah, I think we do,” I mumbled as I brought up the rear and joined my parents in the living room, seeing what they saw: a pile of AJ’s clothes, a bottle of lube and a butt plug on the table, and a towel on the couch.
I swiped up the towel and the items from the coffee table and stood in front of my parents.
“Why don’t you two have a seat? I’m gonna throw some clothes on. We need to talk. There’s wine and beer in the fridge if you want.” I knew at least one of us was going to need a beer.
AJ was in a sweat suit, sitting on the bed, running his fingers through still-damp hair. Absentmindedly, I dropped everything in my hands to the floor, shedding my bathrobe as I spoke and adding it to the pile.
“You ready to do this?” I asked.
“What? I … No?” AJ stood up. “Jackson, you don’t have to … I can stay in here or try to slip into the guest room. It’s not like I didn’t used to sleep here before, occasionally. On your time, Jax. We don’t have to do this right now. You don’t have to do this now!”
“It’s too late for all that. They saw the lube and the … “ My hand pointed absently at the items I’d tossed to the floor. “And ... this is my time, baby. All that stuff you said before, when we were … making love, about not being alone, about being together.” I was rummaging through my drawers and happened to pull out a matching pair of FDNY sweatpants.
I slipped them on along with a plain white T-shirt, then stood in front of AJ.
“I could fly you to London tonight, but you don’t care. We could take Vee to Florida and spend a month as VIPs at the happiest place on Earth, but you’d never ask. We could both quit tomorrow and live on some island in the Caribbean, flying our families down to us as we basked in the sun”—I leaned in closer to whisper in his ear—“and fuck like bunnies.”
He laughed. “Make love like bunnies.”
“Make love like bunnies,” I agreed.
“But you don’t want any of that. You want me, Jackson Dorso of the FDNY. Reformed playboy, trust-fund baby, and your man. That’s all that matters. And the truth. The truth matters, Aje. And I’ve made us hide behind lies for months. We were going to tell them next week anyway. Come with me now?”
“I love you, Riley Jackson Dorso.”
“Love you too, Alexander Jeremy Gordon.”
“Let’s do this?” He feigned confidence.
“Let’s do this.” I pretended right back.