CHAPTER 20
JETTE
Jette’s head rattled against the window as she stirred from her nap.
Her eyes felt stiff and swollen and the residual pounding in the base of her skull had yet to quiet.
She hadn’t meant to fall asleep but the last several hours had left her struggling through an exhausting case of emotional whiplash.
She reached into the bag at her feet for a bottle of Advil and tossed a couple into her mouth before downing the rest of her water.
The quiet sound seemed to catch Finley’s attention who locked eyes on her with a devilishly knowing grin.
“Late night, last night?” she asked as she climbed out of the chair she was lounging in and slid onto the cushion that Jette was already occupying.
Jette was too tired to try and shift away.
And if she was being honest, it felt nice being pressed against someone when she was feeling this dreadful.
Finley put a comforting arm behind her neck and Jette silently rested her head on Finley’s shoulder.
“Can I please pester you for the details now?” she pressed.
Her voice was quiet but there was an undeniable tone of enthusiasm present.
“I don’t think I can—” Jette began.
“Was it the girls from the show?” Finley interrupted.
Jette shook her head and immediately winced at the sudden movement, but Finley didn’t seem to notice.
She continued on, “I mean, damn, girl. You’ve been on tour all of what, a month?
And you’ve already had a threesome on the road?
I’ve been touring on and off for years and I’ve never—”
“Oh my god, Fin, no,” Jette interjected with an exasperated chuckle. “No threesome,” she repeated firmly. The very idea made her want to reach for her phone and text—
Fuck.
“Then who was in your room this morning?” Finley asked softer this time. “You shooed me away very quickly, you know.”
“Yeah, yeah, yeah,” Jette grumbled and Finley let out a tiny giggle at the sound. “It was just,” she tried not to hesitate on the word, “Just a friend.”
Finley nodded quietly and rumpled Jette’s hair gently.
As an only child, Jette had never experienced a sibling kind of love until she met Emery.
But this tiny gesture felt like what she had always imagined it would be like to have a sister.
Minus fighting over clothes and whose turn it was to clean the bathroom.
“Hmm,” Finley hummed in response. “Was this an actual friend or a new tour friend?” God, Jette would’ve given almost anything to avoid this conversation but Finley was determined to get the details that—in her defense—Jette had inadvertently promised earlier.
“Actual friend,” she conceded. Though after this morning’s events, she couldn’t be sure if that was entirely accurate anymore. “She’s from home,” Jette offered. “We just happened to run into each other for the weekend.”
“Ah, so this was a ‘What happens in Vegas, stays in Vegas’ sort of thing,” Finley guessed. Jette felt like she’d been kicked in the ribs. A sharp barking laugh escaped her lips as she tried to hold herself together. Her throat still felt raw as her breath caught uncomfortably.
“I guess.” The words fell out of Jette’s mouth in shock. Finley stiffened against her side as she undoubtedly felt the sudden shift. Jette couldn’t bring herself to look Finley in the eyes even as she felt those gray eyes staring sympathetically in her direction.
“Oh fuck, I was totally kidding,” she murmured.
“That was a shit joke. I’m sorry, Jette.
” Finley wrapped her hand around Jette’s shoulder as they faintly swayed with the motion of the bus.
They sat in comfortable silence long enough for Jette’s eyes to flutter tiredly.
She had no way of knowing how long they sat like this before Finley spoke again.
“You obviously don’t have to say anything,” she began earnestly.
“But we’re all here if you ever need someone to talk to.
Me and the girls, we’ve been through fucking hell and back together.
And we protect our own, you know? You’re one of us, babe. We’ve always got your back.”
Jette only nodded once before a hot tear streaked down her nose and landed in her lap.
If Finley noticed, she had the decency to pretend like she hadn’t, giving Jette a shred of dignity to cling to.
For being a passionate and emotional person at times, Jette couldn’t stand to break down in front of others.
She could count on one hand the amount of times that she’d ever cried in front of someone.
And today, she had already cried in front of two and it wasn’t even 4pm yet.
“Love you, Fin,” she mustered quietly once her throat stopped feeling like it was swollen shut.
“Love you, J,” Finley answered without a second of hesitation.
She squeezed Jette’s shoulder in a small side hug and Jette felt her composure threatening to crumble again.
She needed some space to herself. She leaned into Fin’s neck affectionately before moving to stand, her legs wobbly underneath her.
“We’re thinking about going to dinner later on if you want to come? ” Finley asked.
“I’m exhausted and I have a raging headache that will not fucking quit so I think I’m just going to go to bed early.
But I’ll text if anything changes, okay?
” Jette gave a tired smile that felt foreign on her lips as she shot an appreciative look at Finley who was still curled up on the chair.
Her head pounded sluggishly as she made her way to her bunk at the back of the bus.
It only seemed to lessen once her head finally hit the pillow behind the heavy drawn privacy curtains.
Jette tossed and turned for what felt like hours until the bus finally came to a gentle stop.
She could hear the rest of the group quietly shuffling around and Jette let out a silent sigh of relief when Finley quickly covered for her and told the group that Jette was too tired to make it to dinner.
Her eyes and throat burned as she fought to hold back the tears that lined her lids.
She was all but counting down the seconds until she would finally be alone.
The door to the bus had barely latched before Jette let out a shaky breath that seemed to come from deep in her lungs.
She wiped away at her cheeks, brushing the powdery salt from her skin as she collected herself.
The silence of the empty space was equally calming and unnerving.
It had been days since she had a moment to herself and the sudden onslaught of quiet stillness made Jette hyper aware of the hollow feeling lingering in her chest. Despite the uncomfortable tightness in her throat, Jette was desperate to fill the silence.
She shuffled through the blankets at her sides until she found her phone.
The harsh blue light of the screen left her squinting in the dark until she could find Emery’s number.
She tucked the phone against her ear and rolled onto her side as it rang.
“Sweet baby J, what’s up beautiful?” Emery’s voice cut through the silence and Jette stifled a sob of relief at the familiar sound.
“Hey Em,” she rasped. Even to her, it sounded rough.
There was a hefty pause on the other end of the call before Emery sighed audibly. “What’s wrong, love?” He knew her better than anyone. It had only taken two words before he guessed something was wrong.
“I’m just…” her voice trailed off exhaustedly. “I miss you. I miss home.”
“I miss you like hell, too, babe. What’s going on? Is it the band? Did something happen?” Emery pressed gently but ardently.
“The band’s great. Everyone is great. I’m just tired and homesick and I’m probably PMSing,” Jette answered as her stomach twisted painfully.
Now that she was on the phone with Emery she couldn’t tell if it would be worth it to explain the past forty-eight hours or not.
The idea of having to steady her voice and recount all the sordid details made her chest ache.
“I’m just having a rough time and I needed my best friend,” she admitted.
“Well babe, you got him. Do you want to talk about it? Or do you want a distraction?”
Jette let out a surprised chuckle as she nodded to herself in the dark. “Distraction, please,” she answered through sniffles.
Emery’s laugh sounded distorted through the call but Jette had never needed to hear it more than at that moment. “Okay, distraction it is,” he announced. “Well I already told you about how I matched with my boss on Grindr, right?”
“What? No!” Jette yelped in shock.
“Oh girl, we have a lot of catching up to do…”