Chapter 29 #3
“I can’t really speak on therapy, because I refuse to pour my heart out to a stranger, but that doesn’t mean you shouldn’t.
The last thing you want to do is push away the people who genuinely love you and want to be in your life.
I’ve done it my whole life, and now I’m lonely and broken beyond repair.
It might be hypocritical of me to say, but I’m glad you are seeking help.
There is still a chance for you to get your happily ever after, and you should do everything you can to make sure you’re the best version of yourself.
Not only for you, but for your family too. ”
“Thank you. Who knows? Maybe we could do a couple of sessions together. Our relationship is important to me as well, and I want us both to have our happy endings. It’s not too late.”
Shaylyn gave me a half smile before getting up to pour herself another drink. When she came back into the living room, she changed the subject, and I gladly followed suit.
Shaylyn asked me to help her take her braids out, so we sat up the rest of the night, watching movies and cracking jokes while we tag-teamed her hair.
Shane sent us a message around 2 a.m. with a picture of his little girl.
She was the spitting image of Shaylyn, which made us giggle.
Shaylyn would always joke that his children would come out looking like her because they got on each other’s nerves so badly.
My phone vibrated, and I saw it was a message from East. He hadn’t been speaking to me much since our last fight, so I was shocked he even reached out. We were fighting over something petty, and honestly, being over here made me miss him and want to lay up under his mean ass.
Essex: You turned your location off. That shit is childish.
Me: You barely looked in my direction in the last three days. I didn’t think you would care.
Essex: My love for you doesn’t turn on and off just because I ain’t fuckin’ with you.
Essex: Where you at?
Me: I’m at Shaylyn’s house.
Essex: Oh, word? How long you plan on being over there?
Me: I think I’m gonna spend the night. My gut is telling me she needs me right now.
Essex: Alright. Don’t make a habit of spending the night away from home. This yo’ house as much as it’s mine.
Me: Okay.
I got ready to put my phone down when it vibrated again. Butterflies filled my stomach as I looked at the message.
Essex: I love you, Lola B. I might not always agree with the shit you do, but I’m not going anywhere. Get some rest.
His words comforted me, and I quickly told him I loved him too before putting my phone down.
“You must have made up with your man. I can hear your heart galloping from down here,” Shaylyn teased.
“Is it that obvious?” I blushed, dropping my head in embarrassment.
“Hell yes. You can’t even control the smile on your face.” She giggled, hitting me with a pillow.
“I’ve got it bad, Cousin. I’ve been sad all day, and that one text erased all of my anxiety,” I admitted.
“I think it’s sweet. I’m happy for you, Cousin. Happiness looks good on you. Just don’t fuck it up by being stubborn.”
“I’ll try. I can’t make any promises. He said he isn’t going anywhere, but I’ve got to get my shit together before I mess it up.”
“You’ve got this. All you have to do is let that man love you.
It might not be easy, but keep trying anyway.
I love you, Cousin. You’ve always been one of my favorite people, and I want you to have all the success in the world.
Promise me that you won’t let our trauma stunt your growth.
You have too much to offer the world, Boogie. ” Shaylyn placed her hand over mine.
“I love you, too, and I promise. I want you to do the same. Life may not have dealt us the best hand, but we can still come out of this on top.” An eerie feeling swept over me, but I pushed it to the back of my mind.
We finished Shaylyn’s hair around four in the morning, and I crawled into her bed while she went into the bathroom to wash her hair. She said she was going to take a bath first and then finish in the shower. I tried to stay awake, but after I heard the bath water running, I eventually dozed off.
In my dreams, I was falling from the sky and couldn’t stop. It caused me to jump out of my sleep.
My chest heaved up and down as I looked around the room.
It took a couple of seconds for me to realize where I was.
I panicked for a split second but settled down when it settled in that I was still at Shaylyn’s house.
I looked over on the other side of the bed, and she wasn’t there.
It struck me as odd, but I brushed it off, thinking she must have fallen asleep in the living room or something.
My hand slid across the sheet as I searched for my phone. Once I located it, I saw it was a little after eight. Even though I had only been asleep for a few hours, I didn’t feel groggy. In fact, there was an unsettling feeling in the pit of my stomach.
Swinging my legs over the side of the bed, I checked my messages. I smiled when I noticed Essex sent a message.
Essex: Hurry up and bring your ass home. A nigga can’t sleep for shit.
I thought about calling him because I knew he was probably working out, but I decided to wait until I went home. Noodle was with Aunt Pam and wouldn’t be home for another day. It would give us time to spend alone together. My bladder was full, so I got up to go to the bathroom.
The moment my feet touched the carpet, my body froze.
The carpet swished under my feet as water rose to my ankles.
When I looked at the bathroom door, my legs almost gave out on me.
The last memory that came to mind was Shaylyn turning on the bath water before I fell asleep.
It felt like the wind had been knocked out of me as I held my phone with shaky hands.
“Shay!” I yelled out.
Silence.
“No. No, this can’t be happening. She wouldn’t do this,” I whispered to myself as I pressed Shane’s contact. He answered on the second ring.
“What’s up, Cuzzo? You still at Shay’s house?”
“Shane,” I sniveled, barely able to speak. I stepped closer to the bathroom door, afraid of what was on the other side.
“What’s wrong?”
Silence loomed over us as I cried. My hand trembled as I twisted the handle. When I realized it was locked, I panicked.
“No, no, no. Please, no,” I pleaded, banging on the door even though I knew no one would answer.
“Boogie, what’s going on?” Shane barked into the phone. My forehead was pressed against the door while I sobbed and screamed uncontrollably.
“I’m on my way!” I heard him yell, but I couldn’t even form the words to respond. Instead, I slid down on the floor and broke down. Shane must have been close by because I heard him bust through the door. I cried even harder when I saw the distressed look on his face.
“What happened?”
His eyes shifted between me and the door. When he looked down and saw the water under his shoes, his shoulders dropped.
“S-She’s in there. I-I went to sleep last night, but I don’t think she—”
I couldn’t even bring myself to speak on the fact that Shaylyn more than likely never left the bathroom last night.