Chapter 19 - Seen #2
William’s lips parted, but he said nothing. Yes, he was worried, though he had no reason to be. It was barely a ten-minute walk, and the neighborhood was one of the safest in the city. If Adathan felt confident he could find his way back, then he should too.
But something felt . . . off.
Maybe Adathan needed space? He spent most of the week alone, so that’d be surprising. But he was never alone outside. Perhaps he just wanted to explore the neighborhood at his own pace. Despite his unease, William could understand that.
“All right,” he said. “Just ring the doorbell when you get home so I can buzz you in. I’ll stop by the hardware store tomorrow after work to get you a set of keys.”
“A set of keys?”
“Yeah.” William smiled, ignoring the discomfort in his chest. “That way, you’ll be able to get in and out whenever you like.”
Adathan didn’t look as thrilled—or grateful—as William had expected. He was still smiling, but his eyes were drained of emotion. Just like when William had knocked on Kyle’s door.
Which made no sense. William was probably imagining things.
“Thank you, William,” Adathan said. “You’re very kind.”
Okay. Something was definitely wrong.
Before William had time to ask, Adathan wrapped his arms around his shoulders and pressed a kiss to his lips.
William let out a soft sigh through his nose. Whatever it was, they could talk about it later—now was not a good time, anyway. He returned Adathan’s kiss, caressing the spot on his back he knew would make him melt.
He really was going to miss him.
Adathan’s smile was much more convincing as he pulled away. William was tempted to steal another kiss from him when a movement caught his eye. He glanced down, his heart sinking at the sight of Oliver peeking through his curtains.
Shit.
“You should go now,” William said, struggling to keep his features neutral. “Don’t wanna keep Oliver waiting.”
“You’re not coming in to say hi?”
“Nah. It’s you he invited, right? You go and have fun. I’ll see you later.” William gave him a quick wave and waited until Adathan had gone into Oliver’s apartment before turning on his heel.
His face fell.
How could he have been so careless?
William knew that eye far too well: Oliver was hurt.
But it hadn’t been his intention to hide things from him. Until yesterday, William had been determined not to pursue a romantic relationship with Adathan—flimsy as his resolve had been. It all happened so fast.
William rubbed a hand across his forehead. Had he moved too fast?
His phone buzzed in his pocket. He grabbed it and read the text he’d just received.
? Oliver: Adathan is cooking lunch.
William’s chest squeezed—he was about to get talked to. He slowed to a stop and stared at the bouncing dots as he waited for Oliver’s next message.
? Oliver: I can’t say I’m surprised. And I guess I’m also not surprised that you chose not to tell me, but that’s beside the point.
I know it’s not your fault. You told me how convincing he can be, and I believe you.
It’s clear he knows how to get into a man’s pants.
But please, William. Be careful. He has no one else in the world. He depends on you.
Anger rose in William’s chest, threatening to spill over. He made a beeline for the nearest bench and dropped onto it, his hand tightening around his phone. He took a few sharp breaths, staring blankly at the thrift store across the street as he tried to steady himself.
William couldn’t tell what frustrated him the most—the fact that Oliver thought so little of him, or that he thought so little of Adathan.
Both.
Both pissed him off.
He grabbed his phone with both hands and typed. Typed and typed. Read the entire thing. Deleted the angry parts. Typed again. Erased and typed. Reread it. Hit send.
? William: Adathan hasn’t tried to “get into my pants” once since I brought him home. But I get why you jumped to that conclusion. If I was you, I would have too. It’s my fault for what I told you on the phone at the hotel. But this has nothing to do with sex.
And it wasn’t my intention to keep it a secret from you. I’m not hiding anything from you. Until yesterday we hadn’t even kissed yet. It’s all very new. I WAS going to tell you. I just didn’t have time to.
Listen. I really like him. A lot. And I know it’s only been a week.
I KNOW, trust me. But I can’t remember having ever felt like this before.
Since he became a part of my life, it’s like a veil has been lifted and I can finally see colors again.
I find pleasure in the small things again.
I feel like I’m reconnecting with the person I used to be before I got into gambling.
And I don’t think it’s one sided. I think I can be good to him too.
I want to make him happy. Make him feel safe.
Help him find who he truly is, not what he was taught he should be.
At least, I want to try. Not that he wouldn’t manage on his own.
He’s not as fragile as we thought, you know.
In fact, he’s a lot stronger than I am, if you ask me.
I’m painfully aware he depends on me. But he’s not alone.
He has you too. And he’s friends with our neighbor.
She’s very nice and likes him a lot. But I’m not saying this to evade my responsibilities.
I know I’m not allowed to fuck this up. I KNOW.
And no matter what happens, I’ll be there for him.
Even if he falls in love with someone else.
I’ll always care for him and support him. No matter what.
William stared at his screen, chewing his bottom lip as he waited for Oliver’s reply, begging the universe he’d understand.
? Oliver: Have you told him all this?
Oliver’s reply wasn’t what he’d expected, but it was one he should have.
? William: No…
? Oliver: Tonight.
William sighed. He tilted his head back, staring at the perfect blue sky as his anger deflated.
Oliver’s attitude stung, but he was right.
Adathan wasn’t just a casual fling—being casual about it wasn’t an option.
William had to build a strong foundation to their relationship, and the sooner the better.
He glanced down as his phone buzzed again.
? Oliver: If you don’t, I’ll know.