Chapter 11
Chapter Eleven
Legs
I wipe my mouth with the back of my hand and rest my head against my knees.
Pregnant.
Two little lines were all it took to turn my world on its head. Even now, eight weeks later, I still can’t wrap my head around the news.
That doesn’t mean I haven’t been planning, though.
I knew exactly how this would play out, so I packed up all my stuff and got Lil to drop my things off at a motel nearby that I’d paid a week ahead for, so I could store my things there.
People are used to seeing her with bags for donations, so nobody questioned it.
I pick up my keys to my new apartment tomorrow. Everything I own will fit in the back of a cab, so after crashing at the motel tonight, I should be all moved in to my new apartment by tomorrow evening.
When Havoc got out of prison and became the new president, I thought things might settle down.
I hadn’t seen Midas with any other woman, mostly because his free time was largely spent with me.
When Amity’s best friend, Nevaeh, became Havoc’s old lady, I was as surprised as the next person.
They couldn’t be any more opposite if they tried, and yet somehow the dynamic worked between them.
Midas spent more time with me as a result and it was hard not to wonder if seeing G and Havoc settle down was making him reconsider his decision to have a relationship.
And maybe he truly was. But would it be with me?
The obstacles between us hadn’t changed, but perhaps Midas’ stance on them had.
I tried so hard not to get my hopes up, but it was impossible when Midas’ hands worshiped me like I was his favorite prayer.
That hope disintegrated the second I saw those two pink lines.
Right now, the only people who know are Lil and Nevaeh, but I’m just delaying the inevitable.
With the chaos surround the club lately, Probe and Dice getting hurt, Nevaeh getting kidnapped and then finding her sister after years in captivity, I’d manage to fade into the background.
But I’d run out of time. The puking is just one of the many signs that will give me away, and a baby isn’t something I can hide from forever.
I brush my teeth, then toss the toothbrush in the cardboard box on the end of my bed, the one holding the last of my things.
I pick up my bunny and hug it to my chest, breathing it in, pretending I can still smell my mom as I try to find comfort in the choice I made.
She said I’d reach a crossroads one day, and I never doubted her.
I had it tattooed behind my ear as a reminder.
I just never thought I’d end up facing the same kind of decision she did.
I pull out the letter and reread the lines that have haunted and comforted me over the years.
…one day, you’ll come to a crossroads, and you’ll need everything you’ve learned. Every trick I showed you and every ounce of courage you’ve got to help you choose the right path. I don’t know what you’ll face, but I know the easy way is usually the wrong one.
Be strong. Be brave. Take the hard path. Crawl uphill on your hands and knees if you have to, but keep going, because I promise you the air is better at the top than it is down here in the gutter.
I refold it and slip it back into my bunny, steeling my shoulders, bracing myself for what’s to come.
This won’t be easy—in fact, it’s going to be one of the hardest things I’ve done—but I can do it. I will do it because I’m already completely in love with my baby, and nobody is going to take that away from me.
I think back to last night, and how I spent it wrapped around Midas, pouring every ounce of love and grief into our goodbye.
I think he knew something was wrong, but he didn’t question it.
He gave me that one perfect moment that I hope I’ll be able to look back on one day with fondness instead of regret.
There’s a knock on the door before it opens, and there he is. He rarely comes here, but he always knows when there’s something wrong. There’s no way he didn’t feel the change before I left his bed early this morning.
“Hey, I was wondering where you were.” His eyes sweep over me, then they drop to the box. I place the bunny inside as he frowns. “What’s going on?”
I sit on the edge of the bed and motion for him to join me. He does, but there’s a tension in his movements, like he’s bracing himself for impact.
“I’m leaving, Midas.”
He looks from me to the box, his eyes going wide.
“Not yet, Legs. You don’t need to go yet.” There’s a pleading quality to his voice that makes my heart ache.
“I do. And you have to let me go.”
He shakes his head, his hand cupping the back of mine. “I’m not ready.”
I look into his eyes, not wanting to hurt him but refusing to pretend anymore. “But I am. It’s time for me to go. There’s nothing keeping me here anymore.”
“I’m right fucking here, Legs,” he chokes out.
“You might be here, but you’re a million miles away. God knows I tried to reach you. I’m not angry, Midas. I’m just... sad. And I’m so tired of being sad.”
“So let me help you find a place, somewhere close—”
I take both his hands and hold them in my lap. “So I can be your booty call? I deserve better than that.”
He looks at me, a frantic edge in his expression making me wary. I swear, for a second, I see an image of me chained to the bed in his eyes.
He’s making this so much harder than it needs to be, so I tell him the one thing that I know will break him. “I’m pregnant.”
The words echo in the room like a bell that can’t be unrung. He’s so still, I’m not sure he’s heard me for a minute before he jumps up and starts pacing.
“No. You’re wrong. Tests are wrong all the time.”
“It’s not wrong.”
“It is. Take another one, Legs.”
“I’m pregnant Midas. Every test I’ve taken says the same thing.”
“Take another fucking test!” he roars at me.
I suck in a painful breath and hold it for a second as he grips his hair.
“No. This can’t be happening.” He turns to me, a mix of sorrow and anger on his face. “How could you?” Before I can react, he pulls back his fist and punches the mirror, shattering it to pieces before storming off.
I hold back my tears and stand, ignoring the shards of broken glass as I pick up my box and walk to the door. I pause in the doorway and look back, saying a silent goodbye to this chapter of my life before heading down the far stairs and out the back.
I keep my head down as I walk toward the warehouse. I just have to keep putting one foot in front of the other. Soon, I’ll be out of here, and I can cry in peace.
Only... I’m never that lucky.
“Legs!” Midas’s voice slices through the air, but I don’t stop.
He catches up to me and grabs my arm, spinning me around. I barely manage to hold on to the box, stumbling back at the fury blazing in his eyes.
“You fucking bitch. I never thought you’d sink so low. Of all people, I expected better. Guess Kiki was right—you’re nothing but a patch chaser. At least she admits she’s a whore.”
I turn and keep walking, tears streaming down my face at his words. Rounding the side of the building, I curse when I see a group of people.
So much for sneaking out.
Amity sees me, takes one look at my face, and jogs over just as Midas comes around the corner and starts yelling again.
“Don’t come back, Legs. We’ve got fresh meat. Don’t need to bother with lying bitches like you.”
“Hey,” Nevaeh yells.
“Stay out of this, Nevaeh. This has nothing to do with you.”
“Legs is my friend, and you don’t get to speak to her that way.”
Amity steps in front of me like she’s trying to shield me, but Midas’s words still cut deep, each one a knife to the heart.
“Huh. Typical. I guess sluts like to stick together.”
The sound of skin hitting skin has me peeking out from behind Amity to find Midas on his ass with Havoc standing over him, his chest heaving like a raging bull. Midas rubs his jaw, staring at me with such hatred that it breaks what’s left of me.
“Please get me out of here,” I whisper, my body starting to shake uncontrollably.
Nevaeh walks over and takes the box from me as Amity wraps her arm around my shoulders, leading me away.
I pause when I realize Nevaeh has stormed back over to Midas, Havoc catching her before she can reach him.
“How fucking dare you! You know what? I’m sick to death of your sanctimonious bullshit.”
“She was sleeping around, and now she’s fucking pregnant—”
“And? She’s not your old lady, Midas. She’s not good enough for you, remember?
She was doing her job. Bunnies don’t get to stay unless they fuck the brothers.
You know this. And still, you did nothing but set expectations she couldn’t reach.
You set her up to fail. You’re pathetic.
One day, you’re going to wake up and realize what you did, and by then, it will be too late.
I hope regret keeps you warm at night, Midas. ”
She looks at G and swallows back tears of her own. “Can you and Amity take Legs home?”
“Absolutely. I need to get away from the smell of bullshit anyway,” he snarls down at Midas, taking the box from Nevaeh before walking over to me.
I stand frozen as he presses a kiss to my forehead. “Fuck him, Legs. You don’t need to listen to his bullshit. His issues are just that, his. You haven't done anything wrong; do you hear me? You’re absolutely doing the right thing, and I’m so fucking proud of you for not backing down.”
I nod rapidly, taking his words to heart, and let Amity lead me away.
I glance back at Nevaeh, showing her my gratitude while not hiding a fraction of my heartache, then I turn and follow Amity to the truck. I stand there numb as Amity opens the door and helps me inside. Reaching across me, she buckles me in before climbing in beside me.
She wraps her arm around me, tucking my head under her chin.
“Let go, Legs. I’ve got you.”
And I do. I shatter into a thousand pieces, knowing some I’ll never get back. When we pull away from the compound, I gaze out the window, half expecting to see them lying broken and bloody on the ground.
I swallow the urge to scream at how unfair it all is, but Midas isn’t the only one to blame here.
I knew he was a mistake before I ever slept with him.
But after one taste, I was hooked. The pain he caused offset the pleasure, twisting me up as I gave him countless chances to break me. And break me he did.
The worst part is, even knowing how it would all end, I’d make the same choices. He might have been my downfall, but he’ll always be my favorite mistake.
“Where do you want me to take you, Legs?” G asks softly from the driver’s seat.
I look up at him in the rearview mirror, blinking back tears––so fucking tired of crying over someone who doesn’t deserve it.
“Anywhere but here.”