Chapter Thirty-Five
Ben
Ben had taken every shortcut he could think of and broke every speed limit to get to the hospital. Gavin didn’t even complain, just clung to Ben for dear life.
Thankfully, Gavin knew exactly where to go once they arrived, so he led the way through the sterile-smelling ER, down the hall to the elevator, and up to the third floor for labor and delivery. “Nora said she’s in room 304.”
They probably should’ve stopped at the nurses’ station, but instead they tromped right past until they found Tina’s room.
Gavin went to her as if he’d forgotten Ben was there, but that was okay. God knew Tina needed him more.
He watched as Gavin settled into his birthing-partner mode, breathing with Tina, wiping her forehead with a cool cloth.
Nora went to Ben and said, “She’s in transition, moving faster than the doctor expected.”
Ben had a vague understanding of transition and what his mother meant. “Is that good or bad? Going fast, I mean.”
“It is what it is,” Nora said with a laugh. “It’s different every time, for every woman.”
Right. He knew that. Anna’s first took over a day and a half, but her second kid practically fell out before she was in the bed at the hospital.
As the nurse swept in to check on Tina, Nora said, “I’ll be in the waiting room. Too many cooks in the kitchen.”
Tina looked like she was about to protest, but a contraction hit her and she bunched up, grunting through it, before she could say anything.
Ben waited for it to pass, watched Gavin hold her hand, whisper to her, get her to breathe. When it was over, she dropped her had back on the pillow, panting. “This sucks,” she said, letting go of Gavin’s hand.
“Did you want me to call down and get you set up for an epidural?” the nurse—Sharon—asked as she made a few notes in Tina’s chart. “You’re getting close; this is your last chance.”
“No, I’m okay.” Tina didn’t look okay, but Ben figured that was to be expected.
He stepped closer to her, kissed the top of her head. “I’m gonna go keep Mom company in the waiting room.”
“No, you stay, please?” Tina already sounded exhausted. Gavin kept feeding her ice chips, and the nurse moved quietly, but quickly, around the room, pulling out drawers that had equipment hidden in them.
What the hell was Ben supposed to say? The idea of being in the room for the entire bloody mess of childbirth was on his top ten list of things he never wanted to do. He’d flown back home when Anna had delivered her kids, but he spent his time in the waiting room where he belonged.
As Ben tried to think of an excuse to get the hell outta Dodge, Tina looked at him with wide, terrified eyes. “Please?”
He took her hand when she reached for him, squeezed it, and said, “Yeah, of course.”
Another contraction hit her, and Tina grunted and tensed through it.
The nurse patted her leg tenderly. “The doctor will be in here in just a minute, hon.”
Tina nodded like she understood, but Ben couldn’t imagine how that was possible. He remembered the one class he took with her, only a few weeks ago. “You got your happy place in mind?” He wasn’t sure if he was trying to distract Tina or himself. She nodded in response and then let out a deep breath as the pain seemed to ease.
Another contraction hit, right on top of the last, and Tina let out an inhuman—maybe even unearthly—sound. She scrunched up into a ball, and the nurse said, “Don’t push yet.”
Thankfully, the doctor strode in at that moment, and they got Tina reclined slightly, feet up. The nurse didn’t say anything, but she moved around the bed, sitting Gavin down next to Tina, having him support Tina’s arm and shoulder. Ben mirrored him, but he kept his eyes on Tina’s face. He had zero interest in anything going on down below.
Dr. Adams slapped on some gloves while the nurse tied a surgical mask around his face, and then he took his position at the foot of the bed. “You’re doing great, Tina. The baby is crowning. On your next contraction, I want you to push as hard as you can, okay?”
As it turned out, her next contraction started before he even finished his sentence. Ben glanced at the doctor and didn’t like the look in his eyes. “Sharon, get me the internal monitor.”
Tina panted for breath as she fell back after her big push. “What are those?” she asked, panic in her voice as she watched the nurse roll a small machine over and pass two thin wires to the doctor.
“Nothing to worry about. I’m going to put these two little monitors on the baby’s head so we can watch the heart rate and oxygen, okay?”
Gavin sat silently, his back to the monitor. He swept Tina’s hair off her face and offered her a weak smile.
Tina let out another primal howl and pushed again. Ben watched the monitor. He didn’t really know what he was looking at, but when the constant little beeping line dipped down and faded to nothing, he thought he understood and a shot of fear hit him in the gut.
The doctor looked over his shoulder and said quietly to the nurse, “Get anesthesiology on the line—we may be doing an emergency C-section.”
Even Ben knew what that meant.
Tina seemed to hear too. “What? Why?” Her voice was strangled with emotion, terror.
“We’ve got a very big baby trying to get out of a very small girl. Everything is okay right now, but I need you to listen carefully.” Another contraction seemed to hit her, and the doctor said firmly, “Don’t push, Tina. I know it’s hard, but don’t push.”
Tina groaned and shifted on the bed, and every part of her body tensed. Ben said, “Hey, Tina, breathe with me, okay?” He inhaled deep and let it out slow. Tina tried to do it with him, nodding her head as tears streamed down her cheeks.
“Good job, Teeny,” Gavin whispered. He took the cool washcloth from the table next to him and wiped her face with it as she let out a small sob.
“Okay, Tina.” Dr. Adams was cool and collected, but Ben still didn’t like the worried expression on his face. “I need you to get up on your hands and knees, okay?” Ben shot him a look but didn’t argue. As Tina shifted around and tried her best to get up, the doctor went on, “We’re going to try a very old trick I learned from the best midwife on the planet, okay?”
It took some doing, having to pause in the middle for another contraction, but Tina managed to get up on her hands and knees like she had been told.
The doctor continued, in that soothing, calm voice. “Women aren’t supposed to give birth on their back. It makes it easier for us, but harder for them sometimes.” Ben looked away as the doctor did something behind Tina, speaking the whole time. “I need you to rock your hips, all right? Just rock them a little, and on the next contraction I need you to be very, very still.”
Gavin had turned his head, watching the doctor, and he went white as a sheet. Ben couldn’t help but glance down then. He looked just in time to see the nurse pass Dr. Adams a deadly looking scalpel.
Jesus. Ben felt like he’d stumbled into a horror movie.
Tina got unnaturally still, and Ben knew she was gritting her teeth through another contraction. Before it was over, she let out a scream and then yelled, “Brian, you son of a whore! I hope your dick gets caught in a blender!”
The doctor chuckled through his surgical mask. Under any other circumstances, Ben would’ve laughed too. He’d never heard Tina swear before, or even say an unkind word. She sounded possessed.
As Tina panted and did her breathing exercises, Ben leaned close to her and said, “Hey, when we’re all done here, I’ll call a couple friends and see if we can make that happen, okay?” He got a weak laugh from Tina for that.
“Make that offer again tomorrow.” Her words were strangled around another groan. Her whole body was shaking—exhaustion or adrenaline, Ben could only guess. Probably a little of both.
Mercifully, the doctor said, “Okay, Tina, this is our last shot here. Push.”
Gavin rubbed her back and whispered encouragement to Tina. Ben barely noticed. In his head he simply thought, Please God, let them get through this. Give us this one, okay? Please, God. The closest thing to a prayer in over twenty years, and Ben felt it deep in his bones. He closed his eyes tight, as if God would hear him better. Maybe he even held his breath too.
The doctor’s voice cut through Ben’s silent begging. “Okay, good girl. One more.”
Ben finally looked at Gavin. His eyes were red, tears streaming down his face. Ben nodded but didn’t say anything as Tina gave one last push and then collapsed on the bed.
“It’s a boy,” the doctor announced into the silence. Ben looked down. Blood and Christ only knew what soaked the bedding, and in the doctor’s arms was a tiny, slick bundle. The baby’s hands were balled up into fists, but he wasn’t making a sound. It felt like Ben’s heart stopped as he watched the nurse suction fluid out of the baby’s mouth and nose, wipe the muck from his face.
Hell was probably sitting in a delivery room waiting for a baby to cry. Seconds felt like years. And then, finally, there it was. A high-pitched, strangled cry, and Tina let out another sob, this time probably from relief.
She shifted on the bed. “Can I hold him?”
The nurse came around to help Tina move onto her back again. “Of course you can. You did good, Momma.”
Ben had imagined himself fleeing for the nearest exit, but now he thought it would take dynamite to get him to move. He watched the doctor pass the baby to Tina. The cord was still attached, two clamps hanging off it. “Who wants to cut the cord?”
Shockingly, Ben kind of wanted to. He thought Gavin probably did too, but Gavin said, “I think Teeny should do it.” He sniffled as more tears slipped down his nose before he leaned over and kissed his sister on the forehead.
The doctor passed her a small pair of scissors, and Tina took them with a shaky hand. “I guess I have to do everything around here.” She’d been through the wringer, looked like she’d been run over by a team of horses, but she still managed to joke. Who knew an eighteen-year-old little girl with big blue eyes and a soft heart would turn out to be one of the toughest people Ben would ever know?