Chapter 11
eleven
Lachlan
S he feels like home.
I should stop.
I need to stop.
But, fuck, I can’t.
She shifts her body, wrapping her leg around my hip, kissing me as much as I’m kissing her.
For years I’ve done my best not to remember how her body fit so perfectly with mine.
I pull her tighter, wanting to absorb her because for the first time in so long, I feel alive.
My lips leave hers and kiss down her neck, absorbing every sigh she lets out. Just one more second of this. Just one more and I’ll stop.
The lie isn’t even believable. Ainsley takes my face in her hands and pulls me back to her mouth. My hands roam over her perfect body, taking in each curve and dip. I kiss her deeper as my fingertips breach the hem of her shirt, wanting to take even more from her. She moves one hand to cover mine, pressing it upward. Just as I’m starting to move higher, I hear the sliding door open.
Like cold water over our heads, the moment freezes. We break apart immediately, and I roll her behind me, shifting to my side so Rose hopefully won’t see her.
“Daddy?”
“Hi, baby, what’s wrong?”
“I had a bad dream.”
I’m having one right now. “Go back to bed and I’ll come in.”
She rubs her eyes with the back of her hands. “Okay. I was scared.”
“I know, I’ll be right there.”
Rose goes back inside, and I breathe a sigh of relief, as does Ainsley.
Fuck. Ainsley. I was kissing her and ... Jesus Christ. Did I learn nothing from the last time?
She shifts into the corner of the bed swing and wraps her arms around her legs. I turn to her to say something, anything, because I was so fucking out of line, but Ainsley speaks first.
“Go check on her. I’ll clean this up.”
“Ainsley . . .”
“Don’t say a word, just go.”
She seems upset, and once again I fucked up. I never should’ve kissed her. I’ve spent years perfecting my ability to resist her, but this ... I couldn’t do it.
I stand, feeling like the biggest piece of shit. “We’re going to talk about this,” I tell her. “Tomorrow, we’re going to have a conversation.”
Ainsley clears her throat. “Rose needs you more than we need to discuss any of this.”
“Don’t run away again.”
I run my hands through my hair and head inside to hopefully do right by one of the women in my life.
“Daddy, where’s Ainsley?” Rose asks.
“Probably sleeping. I don’t know.”
I’ve done my absolute best not to think about Ainsley since last night. After I got Rose to sleep, I went out back to talk to her, but she was already gone. Instead of making another mistake by going into her room, I went to bed, ready to have it out today.
However, it’s almost ten in the morning, and she still hasn’t come out of her room.
Rose runs to the front of the house and yells back. “Her car is gone!”
I let out a long breath and look heavenward. She fucking left? Jesus. Again? Are we going to go back to another four years?
I walk over to her room, open the door, and breathe a sigh of relief. Her stuff is still here.
Hopefully that means she’s returning and didn’t just leave her stuff for me to mail back.
I turn to Rose. “I’m sure she went for coffee or something.”
I grab my phone and text her.
Hey, are you okay? You left and Rose is worried.
I am, too, but I leave that part off.
I wait for a reply, but she doesn’t answer.
Great.
Just before I can start to really freak out, the front door opens. “Good morning!” Ainsley’s voice is bright and animated. “I brought cake pops!”
“Cake pops!” Rose yells and rushes toward her. “I love cake pops.”
“Because they’re amazing,” Ainsley agrees and brings the box to the table.
Her eyes meet mine, and I wait for her to glare or tell me I’m a fucking prick. Instead, she smiles. “I brought our morning person some coffee too. Maybe that’ll make you nicer.”
“I’m always nice.”
Rose laughs. “You’re always mean in the morning, Daddy.”
“He really is,” Ainsley agrees.
“I am not.”
“You are,” Rose tosses back.
I grunt.
The girls share a look, and I now understand why some animals eat their young.
“Enough talking about my mood, which is perfectly fine. I have to get ready to head to the field.”
Rose groans. “Can I go to Becky’s and play?”
She truly hates going to the field. “If her mom says it’s okay.”
Rose turns to Ainsley. “Do you want to come to Becky’s too?”
Ainsley laughs softly. “Normally I would totally take you up on that, but I think I’m going with your dad today. I need to watch their practice.”
“Why?” Rose asks with her nose scrunched.
“Well, if I need to write about their sport, then I have to observe.”
Rose shrugs. “Daddy? Can I use the tablet to text Becky?”
“Yes.”
She runs off, leaving me alone with Ainsley. The two of us don’t say anything for a few seconds. Her eyes move to me, and then she looks away before letting out a sigh. “I think we should talk about last night.”
“Okay. You’re right.”
Ainsley takes the seat across from me, her eyes full of worry. “I think we should get married.”
I choke on my coffee. “What?”
“Married. We should get married. I mean, I’m ruined now. You owe me as a gentleman. I’m spoiled goods, and you have to marry me. We were caught, and my reputation is at stake.”
My head is spinning, and I’m not even sure what conversation we’re having. “Ainsley ...”
“I’m serious, Lachlan. I’m a lady, and you totally took advantage of me. That comes with consequences. We’ll marry quickly and it’ll all be fine.”
I stare at her, my jaw slack, and then I rub my temples. She’s got to be joking.
She starts again. “I told the Admiral and Caspian this morning that I’ve been compromised and there’s no other way to fix this other than marriage. They both agreed. Caspian will be here today to give his blessing, and the Admiral will be here tomorrow for the wedding.”
“Tomorrow? What?” I stand, pushing the chair out behind me.
Ainsley places both hands on the table, entwining her fingers. “It’s the only way. You kissed me. You almost touched a boob, that’s ... marriage, buddy.”
I wait for the punch line, or maybe I’m just waiting for her brother to come punch me because ...
A loud, long laugh falls from her lips. “You should see your face! Ha!”
I’m going to kill her. “What is wrong with you?”
“Me? You’re the one who looks like you might pass out. Relax, Lachlan. I’m well aware that last night was something you regret, or whatever you’ve convinced yourself of. I’m completely fine. We’re fine. You don’t need to be worried that I have some grand ideas about what last night was. I’m not doodling your name in my notebook or hoping for anything. It was just a kiss.”
“It was.”
She nods. “Yes, and don’t worry, my dad won’t be coming. He has no idea how many boys I’ve kissed or hooked up with.”
The idea of other men anywhere near her makes my jaw clench. “Right.”
“I mean, we’re not in the eighteen hundreds. It’s fine.”
“Sure.”
It’s completely not fine that other guys took advantage of her. None of that is fine. It’s not fine that I did it, either, but at least I love her. I would fucking lay down my life for her, even if we can never be together .
Ainsley leans back in her seat. “Now, let’s talk about practice today. Is it the last one before the big game?”
The fact that she just changed topics like that has my brain unable to keep up. However, this is Ainsley, and she’s always been this way. Although it’s probably a good thing we don’t talk about other men kissing her, because my ego can’t take it.
“Yes.”
“Okay. I’ll observe. I talked to Everett, and he said after practice we can grab coffee and talk, so I’ll take my car.”
The fuck she is going with Everett for coffee—alone. “I’ll drive us both.”
“Why?”
“It’s better for the environment.” I give the absolute worst excuse.
Ainsley’s brows furrow. “Umm, I drive a hybrid and you’re in a pickup. I’m pretty sure your car is the offender here.”
“Doesn’t matter. No need to double it.”
I really should slam my head against the wall to hopefully knock some sense into it. Seriously, I look like a babbling idiot.
She opens her mouth to say something and then stops. “Okay then. Maybe while we’re doing the interview, you can chime in with your one-word answers, and that’ll really add to the conversation.”
Instead of speaking, because I seem to be unable to say anything intelligent around her, I nod, get up, and head into my room, where at least I know she won’t be.