Chapter Twenty-six
‘Phew. That was intense. I wasn’t sure how’d I cope with those new moves at the end. After two kids, it’s all turning a bit dodgy down below.’ Jazz collapsed into giggles, setting Lara off. ‘Sorry, too much information.’
Lara swigged from her water flask in the local village hall after their Zumba class. ‘I must admit that I thought I was going to have to ask for oxygen at one point. It was all so fast.’
‘I thought I was going to pass out by the end.’
The upbeat music of her Zumba classes always cheered her up.
Lara had enrolled through the autumn months to give her something to brighten the dark nights and as a total contrast to her work at the castle.
Jazz, meanwhile, had carved out a precious night away from childcare duties that didn’t involve ‘stuffing my face with a sharing bag of crisps and a giant glass of wine’.
Who cared that the music for this final week of the ‘term’ was Christmas classics? At least Lara didn’t hear Mariah Carey blasting out at Ravendale.
She even felt a little more optimistic about the chalice, although she wasn’t going to tell the Penhaligons about it just yet. And the ticket sales were beyond everyone’s expectations, driven by word of mouth on social media as well as some cold but dry spells of weather.
En route to the ladies’ cloakroom to pick up their sports bags, Jazz asked, ‘Shall we go to the pub on the way back?’
‘Do you have time?’
‘I can spare half an hour and it is my night off. Luke is in charge. Anyway, I want to leave it long enough to give him an outside chance of getting the kids to bed. They were totally hyper after the school Christmas mini disco. In fact, they’ve been in a permanent state of over-excitement since the middle of November. ’
‘No wonder. How many times have they been to the Spectacular?’
‘Three so far, and Oscar says he wants to go every night once school finishes. I’ve tried to tell him that Mummy spends all day there anyway but he’s adamant.’
Lara could imagine Jazz’s two lively little ones, aged five and seven, badgering her day and night.
They were lovely kids, hyper and exhausting but also sweet-natured and funny.
Not for the first time, she imagined how her own child or children might be if she’d had some.
Would they be lively and sporty? Geeky and quiet?
Redheads like herself? Blond as Rob was …
her heart squeezed with the echo of loss and her jaw ached with the effort of maintaining a smiling face to hide her pain.
‘Wouldn’t be without ’em, though, and I know these days will fly by soon enough. Oscar is already asking some awkward questions about Santa and why he was living in the Ice House at the castle but we’ve fended them off so far.’
‘Oh, I hope you get a couple more years of magic yet.’
Jazz held up her crossed fingers. She wasn’t aware that Lara had been pregnant when she and Rob had split up. That was too personal a secret to share yet – if ever – and Lara certainly didn’t want to be a cloud of gloom, especially on an evening that was meant to be devoted to relaxation and fun.
The village hall had no showers, so the only option was to spritz themselves with body spray and put on jeans, clean T-shirts and hoodies.
It wasn’t ideal but they hadn’t exactly been running a marathon.
Most of the class members had headed straight home, but there were still a couple of regulars in the cloakroom, also changing.
Lara peered in the mirror to put on some lip gloss.
Jazz frowned at her from behind.
‘What’s up?’ Lara asked, lip gloss wand in hand.
‘Nothing. The opposite, in fact. You look glowing.’
‘Do I?’ Lara laughed and turned round. ‘It’s my sweaty post-Zumba look.’
‘No. It’s not only the Zumba. You have an inner glow. You have for the past few days now. Your eyes are shining and you look happy.’
‘Compared to my usual harassed frown, you mean?’
‘You rarely look harassed. Though I think you hide the stress well. You’re the Miss Cool, Calm and Collected of the Castle.’
More like Miss Panic, Lara thought, remembering the state she’d been in over the chalice. ‘But thanks. I do feel life’s on the up.’
‘Is there a specific reason?’
‘I—’ she was about to say no, but realised that Jazz deserved her honesty. Besides, Lara was bursting to share. ‘Come on, let’s freshen up and I’ll tell you at the pub.’
The Fellside Inn was nothing special but it was cosy and welcoming, and they passed it on Jazz’s way to Ravendale, where she would drop off Lara before heading to her own house in a village a few miles further on.
Because of the route, Jazz usually drove, which gave Lara a chance to relax over a drink.
She decided to try the pub’s ‘homemade’ mulled wine and took her glass and Jazz’s elderflower cordial back to the table.
The pub was quiet midweek but there was a fire crackling in the hearth and the beams were adorned with fairy lights.
Lara sipped her wine and felt her limbs relaxing very pleasantly.
‘So, what’s the secret behind the inner glow?’
‘I think you might have guessed, but before I tell you more, please promise me that you won’t let on to anyone. Flynn and I – we’re such an early days thing that I’ve no idea if it will last or what. I feel I’m tempting fate by even telling you that we’re – well, I don’t know what we are.’
‘Wow! You’re having hot sex with the hot biker guy?’
‘Jazz!’ Lara squeaked. ‘Please, please don’t say that in public. Or at all.’
‘Why not if it’s true?’ Jazz asked with a cheeky grin. She did lower her voice however. ‘I’m very happy for you. Both of you. He seems a nice, decent guy and he’s hot. And I have to apologise, as I feel like a total cow now for passing on that stupid gossip. I should have known better.’
‘It’s OK. I’d have done the same, if our roles had been reversed. I know you didn’t mean it maliciously and you’d no idea we were – interested in each other.’
‘That’s very generous of you. Oh, this is so exciting for you, Lara.’
Lara nodded, wanting to grin from ear to ear but still cautious.
‘I didn’t think it was fair to keep you in the dark.
We’re having to skirt around each other and pretend there’s nothing going on.
I don’t want to be the centre of attention and Flynn definitely doesn’t.
Also, I can’t shake off the worry that I’ve gone and done something I swore I’d never do. ’
‘Oh … what’s that, then?’
‘Date a work colleague. After Rob, I swore never to do it again, because the fallout is just so huge.’
‘Only if it goes wrong.’
Lara sighed. ‘Yes.’ She also could have added that she’d also been determined not to fall for any man who wasn’t willing to make her a priority in his life.
The fire glowed in Jazz’s brown eyes. ‘And he’d be the one who’d be out on his ear, not you. He isn’t the lord of the manor here. You’re top dog: he’d have to go.’
‘He said that too, but … I don’t want anyone to have to leave. Even by getting together, the risk is that both of us could get hurt and he’d probably end up quitting.’
‘Lara, stop projecting so far forward. I get that His Shitty Lordship made your life impossible, but this isn’t the same situation and my gut tells me that Flynn is one of the good guys. Who knows, he could even be the one?’
‘Hmm,’ Lara said, trying to shake off the sense of unease that niggled at her despite her friend’s wise words. ‘I’ll admit that would be very nice.’ Very nice indeed, she thought, as a memory of Flynn lounging in his bed wearing zero clothing came into her mind.
‘Let’s drink to it, shall we?’ Jazz said, smiling as she lifted her glass. ‘To “the one” and to a much happier Christmas than the last one. You deserve to let your hair down and celebrate more than anyone I know.’
The Spectacular was winding down when she arrived, so she was grateful for being able to cut in to the private staff car park and avoid the crowds queuing to leave.
She slipped across the courtyard to the gate that led through to the staff cottages area but stopped under the archway.
Flynn was helping a woman with a buggy down the step from his place.
In the light spilling from the doorway, it was unmistakably Molly the waitress and her baby.
Lara dipped back into the shadow of the gateway. Flynn was saying something to Molly but she couldn’t hear what. She wasn’t sure she wanted to hear, but one conversation was ringing in her head.
‘I’d forgotten I was meant to meet Harvey at a pub. I am sorry.’
So why wasn’t Flynn meeting Harvey at the pub? Lara had expected him to be out until much later. Why was he here with Molly?
She could accept that his plans to meet Harvey had changed, but what was Molly doing in his cottage? With her baby too?
It could hardly be anything suspicious with the baby in tow, but it was very odd. She was probably half his age and, as far as Lara knew, they were strangers.
He’d tell her as soon as he could, she thought. She could even knock on his door now and ask him, yet something held her back.
Why should she hassle him? It would seem needy, and she would never ever be needy again. Not after Rob. Not ever.
No, she would wait for Flynn to explain, as he surely would.
Telling herself there would be a perfectly reasonable explanation, she walked to her cottage and went inside, turning on the lights.
Who knew, Flynn might pop over at any minute with a ‘You won’t believe what happened tonight’ tale they could both laugh at.