Chapter 43
CHAPTER FORTY-THREE
cameron
“HEY, CAMERON?”
Natalie had been relatively quiet on our ride back to her house.
I could tell she was contemplative, but I knew her silence wasn’t bad.
She looked more relaxed and at ease than I’d seen her in a long time, and her voice sounded assured, like whatever she was about to say or ask me was something she felt confident about.
“Yeah, Sunshine?”
I drove through the alleyway in the back of her town house, where I normally parked if I was spending the night. Finding my usual spot, I stopped the car and turned to face her.
Natalie pulled her bottom lip through her teeth as she turned my way, too, looking me up and down, and I had a feeling she was about to fuck with my thin restraint.
Did she think it only affected her when I edged her? That I didn’t feel just as deprived?
“Can I make one request for tonight?” she asked, surprising me.
“You mean for when I take you inside and fuck you?”
There was still just enough light in the sky for me to see Natalie’s cheeks tinge pink.
“Yeah,” she said, faint but not shy. Not anymore. “For that.”
“Anything.”
I enjoyed taking a more dominant role in the bedroom, but mostly because I loved seeing the trust in Natalie’s gaze when she followed my directions.
I loved knowing I could provide her a sense of comfort, moments in time where she didn’t have to think, and her pleasure was the entire focus.
I loved giving that to her. And watching her take it, too.
Watching her take whatever I decided to do, however I decided to make her come, turned me the fuck on.
But I had no problem if she wanted to dictate more of what happened when we were together.
“I’m bringing it up now instead of in the moment because I want you to know that I mean it,” Natalie rushed on. “I understand why you insisted last time, considering my…emotional state and what I’d requested before, but this time—”
“Natalie,” I cut in because it wasn’t adding up in my brain what she was talking about.
“Sorry.” She sucked in. “I’d just—I’d like you to fuck me without a condom.
” She swallowed and added, “Using one was a safety measure for me. A security blanket. But I already feel so safe with you, Cameron. And I don’t feel like I need that anymore.
But it’s up to you, and if that’s something you’re okay with. ”
If I was okay with that?
Her words were squeezing my heart. And my dick, making it feel like it was going to explode. The chance to feel all of Natalie London with no barriers?
When I remained speechless, Natalie went on to add, “I’m still on birth control, of course, and—”
I shook my head and stepped out of the car.
I hadn’t meant to hesitate when she made her request; I’d just been stunned. And I didn’t want her to misunderstand. So I walked around to Natalie’s side of the car and opened her door when she still hadn’t. She looked up at me like an adorable deer in the headlights.
Jerking my head toward the back door, I directed, “Inside, Mama.”
“Oh.” Her mouth formed a perfect O as she blinked at me, and then she scrambled to her feet.
Walking with quick, impatient strides with Natalie on my heels, I went to the door, punching in the digits on the lock to let us inside.
My blood had been running hot all evening long, ever since I saw Natalie wearing that tight little outfit when I picked her up, but now? Now, I fucking needed her. Immediately.
The door swung open, and I reached for Natalie’s hand, pulling her inside the house.
She flew into me with a gasp, and I grabbed her hips to steady her while walking us back into the kitchen, the door shutting with a bang behind her.
An adorable, happy sound slipped out of Natalie, and my heart thumped wildly.
Fuck, did I love this woman. I loved her intelligence, her kindness, her passion.
And I loved being here, in this home with her.
I loved that she’d welcomed me into it, despite her past and the trauma she’d experienced the last time she let a man in.
She didn’t have to give me a chance, and it was a goddamn privilege that she had.
I knew what it meant that I was in her kitchen right now, and I wanted to stay.
With her. And Chloe. I wanted to stay so fucking bad and build a life here, in this house.
Marriage, babies, I wanted the whole damn thing with Natalie London.
And even though I couldn’t say all of this, not yet, not when I’d promised to follow her timeline, and it was still so soon, only our first official date…
I wanted a little bit of it tonight. And I suspected she did, too.
She’d been so vulnerable earlier, so reassuring that she wanted me to be here, even if she wasn’t quite ready to say words that were on the tip of both of our tongues.
And that was okay. Maybe tonight, we could just play make-believe. Maybe we could just lean into it, let her see how it tasted without risking anything yet.
“You don’t have to reassure me that you’re on birth control, Natalie,” I said lowly, continuing to walk her back until she bumped into one side of the kitchen island. “In fact, what if tonight we just…pretended?”
She blinked, confused. “Pretended?”
“That you’re not.”
“That I’m not?”
“On birth control.” I used my grip on her hips to pick her up and slide her onto the countertop.
She gasped in surprise, but her eyes glowed, tracking my words.
“And what if we pretended that I’m not just playing dad?
” I wedged myself between her legs and tried to control my grin when she automatically spread her thighs for me, letting me in.
“Hm, Natalie? Just for tonight, what if we pretended that that’s exactly what I am. ”
Natalie’s breath hitched, but it was hard to say if it had more to do with my proposition or the way I was trailing my fingers up and down her sides. Or maybe it was the press of my erection between her legs when I pulled her to the edge of the countertop.
Her chest heaved as I lowered my head, grazing my lips over hers in a ghost of a kiss.
“I think I’d like to play house with you, Mama,” I breathed and then held my breath, waiting for her to say something.
I didn’t have to wait long.
“Yes, please.” Natalie licked her lips, wetting them and teasing mine in the process. “As long as playing house involves you fucking me in our kitchen.”
Oh, she was going to get fucked, alright.
“On our countertops?”
“Mhm,” Natalie hummed, leaning on her palms and tipping her head back to allow me better access. I trailed my lips down her neck, licking at her pulse point, feeling the racing pace of it beneath my mouth.
“You’d like that, baby?”
“Yes,” she sighed, sounding so fucking contented by the idea of it all that a growl emitted from my chest, and within seconds, my hands were sliding beneath her skirt, finding the band of her underwear, hooking my fingers in it.
“Lift your hips for me, then, Sunshine.”
Natalie did, and I yanked her underwear down her legs before stuffing them in my pocket. We wouldn’t be needing those tonight.
Natalie watched me, her gaze seductive, confident. “Am I ever going to get those back?” She raised a brow, casting a glance at my pants. “That’s not the first pair of underwear you’ve slipped into your pocket, never to be seen again.”
She remembered that, did she?
Guilty.
My hands found her thighs again, palming them. And then I raised a brow back and dropped my voice. “What else am I supposed to wrap around my cock when I’m at home, thinking about you, and you’re not there?”
Natalie’s gaze gleamed, flaring at my insinuation. “Do you really do that?”
“Do you want me to send you a picture next time?” I asked, leaning in to whisper kisses over her mouth.
“Uh-huh.” Her warm breath hit my lips, sending a shiver through me, making me groan.
Fuck, I needed her.
Natalie tipped her chin in anticipation of my kiss at exactly the right moment, once again proving our connection.
My mouth slanted over hers hungrily, ready to devour.
Holy shit, I wanted to taste and touch and tease every inch of this woman, and Natalie was just as ready for that.
She moaned and pushed herself up, kissing me harder, wanting the same thing I did.
My name came out of her mouth, a little whine that was so fucking satisfying.
Hearing her desperation was like music to my ears, a reassurance that I wasn’t alone here in my want.
We both wanted the same things. Some of it was big and scary and momentous, but some of it was as simple as breathing. Some of it was just the need to feel her body against mine, to feel the perfect way we fit together again.
“Natalie.” Her name sounded harsh coming from my lips, but the desire was unrelenting, almost painful at this point, and I didn’t have it in me to tone anything down. I knew she’d understand. “Your top. Off. Now.”
“What?” Natalie faked a gasp when I started yanking at the ties in the back. “You don’t like it?”
“I like it too much,” I assured her, my voice low and taut.
“I like how it fits your body like a fucking glove because God, do I love your body. I like just about everything about it except how goddamn—” I grunted, ripping the laces far enough apart that there was enough give for her to slip it over her head. “Hard it is to get off.”
Natalie huffed a laugh. “Looks like you managed.”
“Almost.” I gripped the hem of the top. “Arms up.”
Natalie sat straighter and put her arms in the air, letting me slide the corset over her head. I threw it to the floor, where it would likely stay for the rest of the night.
The hottest and most infuriating piece of clothing I’d ever encountered.