Chapter 9 Ezrah
Chapter nine
Ezrah
Ididn't want to leave early, but Ethan forced me. I couldn't help but feel down because I promised Sebastian we'd grab a drink after our shifts.
What was going on with him?
What was going on with me is the better question.
Lying in bed, I replay all our past moments. Aziel and Sebastian were never the closest siblings, but sometimes we spent time together. Their mother made us take him along on a few dates. That was the only time we ever watched a movie with Sebastian.
I remember one time I asked him if it was okay to watch a movie with him while I waited for Aziel to finish his shower. He refused. I chuckle, remembering his shocked expression and adamant refusal.
'Movie time is my time,' he'd said.
To this day, I don't know why the guy was so obsessed with watching movies alone.
I try not to think about the first time he called me Daddy, but the memory sneaks in anyway. I was twenty-two and he was eighteen. We were sitting in the kitchen, about to eat breakfast.
Aziel kisses my forehead and laughs at the joke I said.
"You and your jokes," he says.
"They're good, admit it."
"No. They're terrible, that's why I laughed."
I turn to Aziel's baby brother and ask, "Are my jokes good or bad?"
Sebastian looks between me and his brother. "They're good."
"Ha! See?" I say to my boyfriend.
"Traitor," Aziel glares at his brother.
I've always wondered how the two of them can be so different. While Aziel is goofy and carefree, Sebastian is reserved and awkward at times. He doesn't speak a lot, but somehow he's always there in the corner. Today, him sitting with us for breakfast, is a surprise.
"Let's eat. The pancakes will go cold, and I know they're your favorite," Aziel says to me with a fond smile.
I love this guy so much.
"I'll leave you to it," Sebastian says as he starts to get up.
I frown.
"Sit down and eat," I say, my voice coming out as a command. It wasn't my attention, but Aziel told me his brother doesn't eat a lot these days.
Sebastian freezes for a second before blurting, "Whatever you say, Daddy."
My eyes widen in horror, and Aziel chokes on his pancake.
"The fuck did you call my boyfriend?" he explodes.
"Hey, calm down. He was joking." That was a bad joke, but nonetheless a joke.
Sebastian shrugs as he places a pancake on his plate. "Ezrah was commanding me like a Dad would, so it was fitting."
Aziel and I sigh in relief at the same time. A Dad, of course. Their father had never been in the picture. Well, he had been, but for a short period. I'd often thought about what Aziel told me, how much he missed their father. But I never thought about what that meant for Sebastian.
"It's okay," I tell him. "Eat your food and don't worry about it."
After that, he kept calling me Daddy jokingly. It drove Aziel crazy, but I didn't mind. Was it weird and uncomfortable to be called Daddy by a him? Fuck yes. But I understood. He just wanted the illusion of a father figure in his life. I didn't mind giving him that.
Besides, I rarely saw him back then. It wasn't an issue.
Even after he grew older, he kept at it. I still flinch remembering the day of Aziel's and my wedding, when Sebastian hugged me and called me Daddy in front of everyone. The guests froze. My cheeks burned as I laughed awkwardly. Aziel fumed. But Sebastian? He looked pleased with himself.
Remembering it now makes me laugh out loud. It had been an insane moment. But a good one, in its own twisted way.
It's already two a.m. and I need sleep. Tonight's walk down memory lane wasn't as painful as before. Maybe because I focused on Sebastian.
He's no longer the kid I used to know. He's an adult now, a man I barely recognize. It makes me a little sad. I thought we'd always be family.
I sigh, just as the doorbell rings.
Frowning, I pull on some trousers but don't bother with a shirt. Whoever it is, they must be at the wrong apartment. Nobody comes here in the middle of the night.
"Hello. You must have the wrong-"
"I don't," a soft voice says.
"Sebastian?"
I'm stunned. Is it really him?
"Yes. It's me. Can I come up?"
I open the building door without a word. While I wait for him to climb the stairs, my mind races. How the hell does he know where I live? And why is he here?
All of those questions disappear the second I see him.
He has a small smile on his lips, but it's forced. His eyes are tired, and his shoulders are hunched, drawn tight.
I open my apartment door wider. "Come in. Are you okay?"
He starts to say yes, but then shakes his head and presses his lips together. I pull him into me and hug him tightly. He wraps his hands around my middle and burrows his head in my chest.
"What's going on, little one?" I whisper, slipping back into the old nickname I had for him. Aziel always hated it, so I stopped using it.
Sebastian just shakes his head.
"Let's go inside," I suggest.
He shakes his head again, refusing to let me go. I'm starting to get more and more worried by the second.
If he won't move, then I will.
I hook my arms under him and lift him easily. He lets out a startled cry, then wraps his arms around my neck and clings harder.
I close the door behind us and carry him to the couch. I try to set him down, but he won't release me. He's stronger than I thought.
"Sebastian, you need to let me go," I murmur.
"No," he says.
At least he's speaking.
"Come on, little guy. I'll get you water, and you can tell me what's wrong."
"Nuh-uh."
I sigh, shutting my eyes for a moment. He's obviously shaken. Even earlier, when I saw him at the club, I knew something was wrong. Whatever it is, it's bad.
I make up my mind. Sitting on the couch, I shift him onto my lap. He shivers, so I grab the blanket draped nearby and wrap it around him.
"Better?"
He nods against my neck.
I stroke his hair gently. Offering what little comfort I can. The position is strange as hell, I know that. But this is Sebastian. Even if we didn't spend much time together when I was with Aziel, I always felt protective of him.
As much as Aziel was cold, I had a soft spot. Sebastian had a way of twitching his nose when he was nervous, like now. It makes him look so small and defenseless. It makes me want to shield him.
If sitting in my lap helps him tonight, then so be it. But I will find out what's bothering him. No matter what it takes.