Chapter 31
CHAPTER THIRTY-ONE
ATLAS
Calvin made it easy to forget about every worry burning through me last night—every time I started to, he’d wrap his arms around me even in his sleep and pull me close. It’s like he can read me even when I say nothing at all.
And even though he doesn’t think I’m a monster, even though I want to spend the rest of my life proving to him I’m not, once today is done… well, for today…
For today, I’m ready to be the fucking boogeyman. I’m ready to be every nightmare Keegan has ever had brought to life. He’s spent all these years hiding from me, throwing his men my way to act like a distraction… but I’m done with that.
It’s time to say boo, bitch.
I’m lucky that Calvin had us clean up the kitchen after my little display last night before we went to bed, because both of my kids are at the house bright and early the next morning. I’m still a little shocked that I actually lost my shit… I honestly can’t remember the last time that happened.
I can’t remember it ever happening, actually. Even after Julia’s death, I kept it together because I had two little boys looking at me all the time, two broken souls who needed someone stable to teach them how to keep functioning when their world was thrown off center.
But… for the first time, I felt like I could let it all go—that I could actually stop for a moment and feel.
Calvin keeps giving me gifts, and I’m not sure he even realizes it.
Wylder brought Mateo back with him—this time they’re both dressed in all black like they’re going on some secret operative mission. North is wearing his usual clothes… and Ranen is nowhere to be seen.
I’m not surprised about that one. North would probably rather cut himself open than let Ranen anywhere near what’s about to happen. My eyes flick to Calvin—as much as I thought I’d feel that way, there’s something comforting about knowing he’s going to be there.
There’s something centering to know he loves me enough that he’d follow me into hell to slay my demons, and he’d do it with his fingers linked in mine and a gun in his other hand.
That’s love in all the ways I could ever hope to define it.
“Does everyone know what they’re responsible for?
” I ask, and North and Wylder quietly murmur that they know—Wylder is going to the back to take out the guards, and North to the front to get rid of the guard dogs.
Mateo doesn’t say shit, but I’m starting to realize that’s kind of par for the course with him, and I trust that he’s going to take care of the security system.
I wonder if he’d be more open and warm if he wasn’t constantly throwing Wylder dirty looks.
After we go over the plan one more time, we get into my car and Wylder’s Jeep and head off.
We were going to park a few miles from the house, but Mateo found us a perfect dirt road on the property that would lead us within a few hundred feet of the back yard—he did it when I mentioned hiking, muttering something about “below his paygrade” and “not in these shoes.” Three keystrokes later, and he had a map pulled up with the road highlighted.
I really need to get his number for the off chance that I need something technical done. He’s kind of a wizard with it.
I don’t realize that I’m anxiously drumming my fingers against the steering wheel on the drive over until Calvin reaches across the dash and takes my hand in his. A level of calm settles over me again at the gentle squeeze he gives, the soft look of reassurance.
No matter what, this is going to be over soon. Most people depict firefights as these long, drawn-out things… but as we pull up to the location Mateo pointed out, I know the truth.
This is going to be over in less than fifteen minutes, and we’ll know one way or another who is coming out the other side.
As Calvin leans across the console and presses a gentle kiss to the corner of my mouth, I realize that I really, really need it to be us.
There’s no reason to talk now that we’re here. Honestly, the silence is almost comforting… I’m surrounded by professionals, and I realize that this is the first time since they were teenagers that I’ve seen Wylder and North working together.
Wylder moves like the world’s largest shadow, glancing into the car where Mateo is sitting with his laptop on the dash.
The pretty man gives a two finger salute, the first somewhat friendly gesture that I’ve seen between them.
I do notice that he keeps his eyes on Wylder as he silently moves toward the back of the house where the guards are patrolling in the distance.
North isn’t a shadow—he’s barely contained fury that walks with a purpose, though he’s just as quiet. He tosses me one glance and jerks his chin up in silent acknowledgement, then takes off at a run toward the front of the house to take care of the guard dogs.
That just leaves me and Calvin and the back door in front of us. Mateo lets out the quietest whistle, signaling that the security systems are offline and we’re good to go. After that, the only thing I can do is start walking.
As Calvin steps up beside me, I speak in a voice barely above a whisper.
“I need you to stay behind me.”
“Atlas—” I cut off his protest with a gentle touch of my hand to his.
“It’s not because I don’t trust you, and it’s not because I don’t think you can handle yourself. But I do know if he sees you first, Keegan will shoot you out of spite. I know if he gets a chance, he’ll take you out before he takes me out so I have to live with it.”
“I can still help, I can…” he trails off when I glance at him.
“If the fight goes south, if he gets the upper hand, I need you there to help me. I trust you to have my back. I’m not asking you to stay out of the room, Calvin… but I need to know that if something happens, you’ll put a bullet between that fucker’s eyes. I trust you to do that for me.”
His gaze goes a little misty, but he nods once… twice… and then quickly shakes his head. “Nothing’s going to go south.”
Fuck, I hope he’s right. I want to stop walking, to take a moment and press my mouth to his for one last kiss…
but we’re already at the door, and even though Wylder and North haven’t made much noise, I know I can’t keep putting this off.
As I wrap my fingers around the handle, Calvin pulls the gun I gave him and carefully cups it in his hands, taking the slightest step behind me as he does.
Fuck, he’s perfect.
I take one more deep breath and look at him—really look at him—at his warm eyes, so serious right now, and the way he has his body leaned toward me like he wants nothing more than to step in front of me to protect me.
If I really believed in things like fate, I’d think maybe somewhere out there, Julia sent me Calvin because she knew he was all the missing pieces of my soul.
I’d think she was watching now to see that even though I’d finally moved on, I was still thinking about her—that I still loved her.
That I’d still avenge her.
But fate is beyond my paygrade. I believe in bullets, and I’m going to put one between Keegan’s eyes.
I give Calvin one last nod and quietly open the door. I only push it a few inches, listening as I do. There’s the sound of movement, and in the distance I can hear the low, rumbling growl of a dog.
People are easy—animals are less predictable. As much as I want to think that North and Wylder can silently take care of their part of this and join me for the final showdown, I can’t bank on the fact that someone won’t yell. Or bark.
I step into the house instead and carefully trail my gun around as I clear the area. It’s a little reassuring that I can feel Calvin doing the same, moving in the opposite direction to me so the entire room is covered.
I glance at the man I love, and he jerks his head in the direction of a door on our left. It takes me a second to realize why—it’s still slightly swaying.
Movement.
Which means Keegan went that way.
I could kiss him, but instead I turn and head that way. We push through that room and into another one… and when we round another corner, he’s there.
Keegan… with a gun in his hand and his face pointed toward monitors that show his guards still carefully walking the perimeter of his house… directly in front of it.
Where no one is standing.
Like he realizes at the exact same moment I pull my gun up, he turns. I can see it in his eyes—the fear, the desperation… but beneath that, the same cruelty that caused him to kill Julia, the same viciousness that made him leave Wylder in that car with his dead mother.
The essence of a man who knows he’s dead, but he’s still going to try to fight it.
That fight has him firing a shot before he has time to take aim, and I’m forced to throw myself back, taking Calvin to the ground with me so neither of us gets hit by a stray bullet.
I was so worried before, so afraid that one of us wouldn’t make it out of here… but I can see it now. Keegan is cornered—North is at the front and Wylder is at the back. I’m here, and all that asshole has is a few computers and a gun in his hand.
When I roll and take aim, there’s the echo of a second gun firing. My shot misses as Keegan darts out of the line of my fire, but Calvin’s takes him in the side, and I hear him scream as he throws himself behind a table.
Later… later I’m going to fuck my man until he can’t walk for a week for how amazing he’s doing. For now, I clear my throat and call out.
“I’d say I’ll make it easier on you if you stop hiding like a fucking coward, but I don’t want to make myself a liar. Still…” I crawl around the edge of the room, ducking behind a sofa as Keegan rises up and fires another shot. “Don’t you want to go out with some pride?”
“Why would I think you can do anything to stop me now, Atlas? How many years has it been? You’re old.”