Chapter 28
chapter twenty-eight
camilo
I was fucking exhausted. I’d been working eighteen-hour days for the last two weeks between work and the freelance translations, and I was feeling close to the breaking point. Since Tom’s mom came for a visit, things had gotten even more hectic with the dedication ceremony.
I was constantly running on fumes and it was starting to cause a real strain between Tom and me.
A couple of days ago when I’d shown up late for a cookie baking date with Libe, Tom asked again if he could help.
When I declined, again, for the first time he actually insisted and said he couldn’t just watch me run myself into the ground, that it was affecting our relationship.
He was right, but I still couldn’t bring myself to agree.
But this week had me so wrung out, I was starting to consider it.
My mom had been off for six weeks now and had two more to go, and I felt very proud of myself and her for being able to give her this time, even with how rough it’d been.
Still, I worried about what would happen once she went back to work.
I even suggested moving back in with her for a while until she found something different, but she’d vetoed that instantly.
It was also hard talking to Tom about it, because all he wanted was to pull out his wallet, and I was tired of having the same argument.
The only thing keeping me together at the end of this long ass week was the fact that I finally had a weekend off.
I was on my way to Tom’s place and the plan was for me to stay until Sunday.
It’d been weeks since I’d had a weekend when I didn’t have extra work to do, and I was so looking forward to some alone time with Tom.
I also still felt guilty about barely spending any time with his mom when she was in town. He hadn’t brought it up, but I knew he’d been upset.
I was running up the stairs of the subway station close to his place when I got a call. I was surprised when I saw the screen. It was almost 6:30 p.m. on a Friday. A call from my mom’s property management office could not be about anything good.
I tried to keep most of the exasperation out of my voice when I answered. “Hello.”
“Hi, Camilo, this is Cindy. I tried to call your mom, but she’s not answering.” The friendly tone in her voice set all my alarms blaring.
“She’s at her Zumba class tonight. She probably shut off the phone,” I said feeling proud of myself for not cursing her out.
“Oh okay, well I’ll just leave the message with you then.” I’d been dealing with this woman for the last two months and had never heard her sound this perky. “I just wanted to let her know she’s all set. We received the payment for all of her arrears, and for the next six months of rent.”
I had to stop and stand to the side on the street, so I could ask her again what the hell she was talking about.
“I’m sorry. I’m not sure I follow. What do you mean she’s all set?
Did my mom come to pay or something?” There was a chance she could’ve borrowed from Odette, but I doubted she had fifteen grand in cash to lend my mom.
“Oh no, the payment came from the office of Thomas Hughes. His assistant called this morning and they wired it to our bank this afternoon. They were very prompt and easy to deal with.”
I had to be hearing wrong.
“Listen, Camilo, I’m sorry to cut you off, but we’re about to close the office, so I have to go. Have a great weekend.”
Funny how happy she sounded now that she’d gotten her money.
I stood there on the street stunned into silence. A few minutes passed before I started walking again, and getting pissed with every step I took to Tom’s house.
How fucking dare he?
I couldn’t believe Tom had done this shit again. After I’d specifically told him, a million fucking times, I didn’t need him to pay for my mom’s expenses, he went and did it anyway.
I got to his house within a few minutes and by the time he opened the door, I was in a righteous rage. I felt completely betrayed and disrespected.
I couldn’t even look at him. He was about to go in for a kiss, but I slunk away from him.
Then he tried to lean in again, but took a step back when he saw my face.
I wanted to scream at him right there on the street, but before I made a scene, I walked into the house.
I didn’t even bother to take off my backpack.
I was not staying in this house for long.
“What’s wrong?”
I scoffed at his question and stepped closer to where he was standing all loose limbed, like he didn’t know what he’d done.
“You’re really asking me that right now, Tom?”
I could tell he was trying to gauge just how mad he’d made me, but when he opened his mouth, I knew he had seriously fucking miscalculated.
“Is this about the rent?”
My head felt so hot I was worried I would give myself a stroke just from what I was having to do not to get in his face.
“The rent?” I asked making air quotes. “It’s not about ‘the rent,’ Tom.
It’s about you paying fifteen thousand dollars for my mother’s housing without my consent.
Behind my back.” I was keeping my voice barely below screaming, while he just stood there with his lips pursed. The calmer he looked, the hotter I got.
I was about to lean into my fury and ream Tom out, but my fucking phone rang again. This time it was my mother’s ringtone. I thought of just letting it go to voicemail, but my concern for her won out.
I took the call while I glared at Tom who looked like he was starting to realize just how badly he’d fucked up. The terrified look on his face did not mollify my anger in the slightest.
“Hey, Mama,” I said, not giving a fuck about how angry I sounded.
“Milito, did Cindy call you?” Excellent, now my mom was all up-to-date.
“Sí.” That word came out so laden with frustration, I was surprised I could choke it out. My mom was silent for a few beats as if she was trying to figure out what was going on with me. Finally she spoke into the phone.
“Papí, please don’t be angry at Tom. I know how much you value your independence, but he was just trying to help. You’ve been going nonstop for weeks and he could do this for you,” she said in a pleading voice. “You need to let people help you, son. It’s not always on you to fix everything.”
I sighed and avoided looking at Tom. If anything, my mother feeling she needed to intercede for his overbearing behavior only made me angrier.
“Okay, Ma. I’ll call you later okay?”
“Are you at Tom’s?”
“Mama, por favor.” I was hanging on to my patience by the thinnest of threads.
She finally ended the call with a worried, “Okay, Milito.”
Before I talked to Tom again, I took a moment to breathe and was still trying to get it together when he started talking.
“Camilo, I—”
So much for calming myself.
I held up my hand at him, shaking my head hard. “No. I do not want to hear it, Tom.”
I took off my backpack then, because I needed to move.
“I don’t know how, after all the conversations we’ve had, after the night of the concert, you would think I’d be fine with you doing this.
I don’t need reasons from you, I know the reason.
You did it because you knew once it was done, I wouldn’t be able to give it back. ”
His face turned paler with every word out of my mouth.
“No, Camilo. I did it because I wanted to help. Mi amor, I’m worried about you.
You’ve been running yourself ragged. I’ve barely seen you in the last few weeks and when you’re here, you’re just so tired.
” His shoulders sagged as he looked at me with a helpless expression on his face.
“And it’s just money, baby. That I have. I could make this easier for you.”
“Oh no. Do not make this about me, Tom. This is about you not getting attention.” I scoffed and threw my hands up as I glared at him. “I get it now.” I snarled at him. “That’s how you managed this perfect act so long. It’s easy to be Mr. Compromise as long as you keep getting what you want.”
“That’s not fair, Camilo.” His face was closed off now, which registered somewhere in my mind as a warning to chill out. But I couldn’t stop.
“You decided you wanted to see me and made those bullshit weekly meetings happen. When you were ready to take the whole thing to the bedroom, I went along with that, too. The moment you were ready for me to meet Libe, there I was.” I cocked my head at his confused expression.
“So now you’re not getting your QT and you do what?
You throw money at it.” I shook my head in disgust. “Compromise is not always getting your way, Tom, that’s called manipulation. ”
“No. We were in this together. Things went further with us because we both wanted it. Because we make each other happy. Because we love each other.”
I knew I was being unfair and hurtful but I didn’t care. He’d taken away my agency, and I didn’t know if I could walk this off.
Tom tried again, this time his voice pleading. “I just wanted to ease things for you. Try to take off some of the burden you’re carrying all on your own.”
I couldn’t believe Tom and his bullshit.
“What do you think I’m doing here, Tom?” I asked waving my hand around the room.
“Why do you think I came to spend the weekend with you? Because I am stressed, I am tired, and when I feel like this, relaxing and watching a movie with my boyfriend helps. I’m not here so you can be my fucking sugar daddy and pay my rent like your kept boy. ” I was crying now and I didn’t care.
“Camilo, don’t make it about that.”
I shook my head in disbelief.
“Making it about what, Tom? Money? You’re the one that made this about money.
I’ve never indicated to you in any way it was appropriate for you to pay for anything on my behalf.
I’m not Maxwell, who you can just ignore and then try to appease by getting him shit or letting him do whatever he wants with your money. ”
Tom looked desperate and scared, but I could not find it in me to relent. If I folded on this now, I would spend my life giving in to him.