Chapter 22
22
JULY 2023, PRESENT DAY
‘You’re quiet,’ Caleb said on the drive back to Spirit after lunch at Maria and Juan’s.
On the horizon, the sky was awash with dusky pink and fiery red. Caleb had been right about a long lazy lunch lasting into the evening.
‘I’m just thinking,’ Belle said as they sped along the tree-lined road back towards Santa Eulalia.
‘About what?’
Gem and Diego was what she was thinking about. She turned the depth of her friend’s deceit over and over in her head. Her shock at Diego’s confession had made her want to phone Gem and yell at her, but she certainly hadn’t been prepared to do that at Maria’s.
‘I was thinking how lovely it was to have a proper family meal like that,’ she said instead.
Caleb made an appreciative huff. ‘It’s one of the things I love the most too.’
‘I think that’s why friendship has been so important to me, because I’m not close to my parents and I have so few memories of joyful family times, which I’m guessing Maria and family have often.’ Belle turned her head to the open window and relished the breeze massaging her face. ‘I assume it’s similar with your friendship with Cara. I’m closer to my friend Hannah in London than I am to my own family and it’s the same with childhood friends like Laurie…’ She couldn’t bring herself to say Gem’s name, not without the fear of her true feelings tumbling out.
‘It’ll be good to have your friends coming out then and to take time off. You must miss them.’
‘Uh huh.’ One of them at least , she thought.
‘By the way,’ Caleb said, clearing his throat, ‘there was a cancellation so I swapped your friends from a standard room to a poolside suite, so there’ll be space for all three of you.’
‘Oh my goodness, you didn’t have to do that.’
‘It’s my pleasure.’ His expression was unreadable in the dusky light, his attention firmly fixed on the road.
By the time Caleb had dropped her back at Spirit, she’d calmed down. Chatting to him about something unrelated had helped; the last thing she now wanted to do was talk to Gem. She felt foolish for not seeing through the lie Gem had spun and for being so ridiculously hung up on a man who’d thought so little of her that he’d slept with one of her best friends when the opportunity arose. Because what was there to be mad about when actually, in hindsight, Gem had done her a favour? Any lingering rose-tinted longing for Diego had evaporated with the truth.
She kept her emotions in check, something she’d got good at doing since the accident. Decompartmentalising and convincing herself she was fine had been easier than actually dealing with feelings, although often that would backfire when underlying worries would slip out as a recurring nightmare. But as for the Diego situation, she’d have the opportunity to confront Gem when she came out to Ibiza the following weekend. There’d be no escaping her and her lies then.
The week flew by in a whirl of organisation and celebration with a private party at both Spirit and Serenity, and Belle was grateful to have work to focus on.
The first club night at Ushua?a for Spirit’s guests was scheduled for the week when Laurie and Gem would be staying, which focused her mind on her friends and cemented the thought that her dream about the ‘what could have been’ with Diego was well and truly over.
When Gem and Laurie arrived a week later, everything was fine. At least, it was on the surface. Belle was acutely aware of the underlying tension with Gem, and just how heartbroken Laurie was following a second failed IVF. The three of them hugged and Belle showed them to the poolside suite, yet she was chock-full of mixed feelings. The last time she’d seen Gem had been at their friend’s wedding in Norfolk. The last time they’d properly spoken, Gem had entrusted her with the news about her and Dan having split up, something Laurie still didn’t know about. Now Belle knew the truth about what had really happened in Ibiza ten years ago, it would only be a matter of time before it all came tumbling out.
‘Wow, this must have cost a fortune.’ Laurie gazed round open-mouthed at the spacious suite with touches of wood and stone alongside pops of burnt orange and zig-zag patterned cushions. ‘You seriously have to let us pay our share.’
Belle shook her head. ‘I got a staff discount, plus Caleb upgraded us to this room when there was a cancellation. And honestly, it’s my treat. It’s only one room, not three.’
Laurie ran her hand along the crisp white bedspread. ‘It’s certainly better than the San Antonio hotel we stayed in.’
‘We were twenty-one and skint,’ Belle reminded her.
‘I’m still bloody skint,’ Gem grumbled, ‘and being thirty-one doesn’t make a blind bit of difference apart from it being even more depressing.’ She turned to Belle. ‘But I’m grateful for your generosity. Sort of figured you wouldn’t have offered unless you wanted to and could afford it. So thanks.’
Although it was said with a begrudging tone, Belle let it slide. The minute they arrived was not the time to let rip with Gem about everything she’d been bottling up over the last week. There would be opportunity for a serious talk later.
Laurie opened the doors to the pool and stepped on to the sun-drenched deck. Belle followed her out to where the wooden steps disappeared into the azure water. The pool wasn’t private but it was only shared with four other luxury suites, each with their own swim-up terrace. Belle couldn’t think of anything better than waking in the morning, slipping into a bikini and diving straight into the pool.
Laurie turned back to Belle. ‘I can’t even begin to explain how much I need this.’
‘I think we all do, in our own way.’
Gem joined them on the wooden deck. ‘You’ve been out here for weeks.’
She already looked effortlessly cool with her hair swept up into a messy bun and sunglasses shading her eyes. Her lips were glossy, and a white maxi dress with pink flowers accentuated her tan. Belle wanted to hate her. She should hate her, but what good would that do when all she really wanted was to forget about everything?
They changed into swimsuits and bikinis, lathered on sunscreen and spent the rest of the afternoon switching between sunbathing and taking a dip in the pool. They chatted, read, listened to music and snoozed. Belle had a week off and it was a chance to be a tourist for a short time. She was determined to make the most of it.
Gem was doing laps of the long curved pool when Laurie put her book down, shuffled onto her side and leaned close to Belle who was lying on the beanbag lounger next to her.
‘Does Caleb like you by any chance?’ Laurie wedged her sunglasses in her dark hair and gave Belle a knowing look.
‘Where on earth did that come from?’
‘It’s just a thought.’ She shrugged. ‘There’s something in the way you talk about him.’
‘He’s a friend, but more importantly, my boss.’
‘I’m only saying it’s incredibly generous of him to give us a swim-up room. Maybe he thinks of you as more than just an employee.’
‘He only upgraded us because of the cancellation.’
Laurie raised an eyebrow. ‘Even so, he didn’t give it to anyone else now, did he…’
Belle bristled. This line of questioning from Laurie was unexpected, and frustrating because it had truth in it. Even the idea that Caleb might like her more than just a friend thrilled her. And maybe it was obvious that she liked him; the attraction she’d felt the other evening had been undeniable, but it was probably down to the setting and the euphoria of a successful wedding. What troubled her was that Laurie’s comments were something Gem would have said. Something Gem would have noticed, not Laurie. Belle wanted to brush away the implication that Caleb liked her in that way, because her attraction to him left her feeling vulnerable and worried about making a mistake again with someone she worked with.
‘He does think of me as more than just an employee because we’re a team. That’s why he’s so successful, because he treats people right and values them whether they clean the rooms or organise the events. But as I said before, he’s my boss.’
‘So? It’s not as if you’ve never been in a relationship with someone you work with.’
Belle shook her head. ‘Don’t even go there.’
‘What?’ She held up her hands. ‘I was only making an observation.’
‘Caleb is… lovely. The perfect boss, so no way do I want to risk anything there. But he’s also all kinds of complicated.’ And all kinds of wonderful too , she thought, her heart overriding her head because the more she got to know him, the more she was drawn to him. ‘He lost his wife to cancer a few years ago too. But the main thing is I don’t want to be with anyone. I shouldn’t be with anyone. I need time to figure me out for once and not jump headfirst into another relationship that could be doomed from the start.’
‘Are you trying to convince me or yourself you don’t like him in that way?’ Laurie said pointedly.
‘No one needs convincing of anything,’ Belle said matter-of-factly. ‘I’m just stating the truth.’
‘Or are you still dreaming of Diego?’
Belle sighed and swung her legs off the lounger so she could sit closer to Laurie. Gem was down the other end of the pool, floating on her back, gazing up at the cloud-free sky. ‘I’ve seen him. A couple of times.’
‘You’ve what!’ Laurie sat bolt upright on her lounger.
Belle shook her head. ‘Calm down, nothing happened. You’re reacting like I slept with him or something. We just talked.’
‘How did you track him down?’
‘Caleb knows him. He’s sort of a business partner, so as events manager I’ve had dealings with him.’
‘You certainly have had dealings with him.’ Laurie raised an eyebrow. She settled back on the lounger and looked intently at Belle. ‘So? How was it seeing him again?’
There was nothing more Belle could say about the connection with Caleb without Laurie being even more convinced about there being a potential romance, and the full truth… Well, she didn’t want to go there, not without confronting Gem first. Everything about being back on Ibiza was different, from where they were staying to how she’d changed, grown up and moved on. ‘There was no spark, no desire. Just memories that should remain firmly in the past.’
‘Oh Belle, I’m sorry.’
‘No, don’t be; it’s a good thing. I think I had an unhealthy obsession.’
The crease between Laurie’s eyebrows deepened. ‘I knew you liked him, but I didn’t realise you felt quite that strongly about him.’
‘Because I never shared my feelings. It seemed a ridiculous notion to have believed I’d fallen in love. No way was I going to admit that to you and Gem.’ After everything she’d found out, she was relieved she hadn’t.
‘You could have confided in me, Belle. I don’t think it’s ridiculous to know instantly that you love someone; it’s how I felt about Ade.’
‘Yeah, well, it seemed crazy at the time. Then, when we got back, I was straight into my new life moving to London, starting a new job and then… Well, you know what happened.’
Laurie took Belle’s hand and squeezed it. ‘It’s a big year for lots of reasons, isn’t it? The ten-year anniversary of the accident will be a difficult day to get through.’
‘It is, so let’s enjoy ourselves and celebrate life and being together.’ Belle pulled off her beach cover-up and dropped it on the sun lounger. ‘Fancy another swim?’
The water was cool to begin with but with the sunshine dancing on the surface it soon felt warm. She swam to the opposite side and rested on the underwater seat with Laurie, enjoying the sense of weightlessness. Behind her were palm trees and the edge of the outdoor terrace of Spirit’s bar. Beyond, the beach was hidden from view behind a white wall.
Gem swam over and bobbed up next to them. ‘What have you two been gossiping about?’
Belle flashed Laurie an imploring look not to say anything.
‘About Belle having seen Diego again.’ Laurie caught Belle’s strained face too late.
‘You have?’ Gem’s eyes widened a touch but if she was surprised or felt any guilt, she was hiding it well.
‘Only because Caleb works with him,’ Belle said coolly.
‘Yes, and we also talked about Caleb,’ Laurie swiftly cut in, ‘and how generous of him it was to put us in a swim-up room.’
Gem snorted. ‘You mean how much he fancies Belle.’
Belle opened her mouth to protest then closed it. There’d been little point in arguing with Laurie so there would be no point in arguing with Gem, plus she didn’t want an argument to turn into that argument. There was also an undercurrent of something in her tone… A harshness that she was probably noticing now because she knew exactly what Gem had got up to in Ibiza. Was Diego the reason she’d been reluctant to return? Because she feared dredging up the past and the truth being revealed?
Belle decided not to say anything. She just dipped her head beneath the water, slicked her hand through her wet hair and floated on her back so her line of sight shifted away from Gem because she didn’t understand the look she was giving her – one of jealousy? Annoyance?
The tepid water was going some way to tempering the heat building inside at Laurie’s certainty that Caleb liked her. The idea turned her insides to mush. She floated away from her friends and considered how she could even contemplate anything happening with Caleb when he was dealing with his own emotional torments.