39. Bennett
THIRTY-NINE
BENNETT
About halfway through the first week of my Marley-less existence, I started a list called “Things to Tell Marley”:
1. Yogurt has been sitting in your chair every night since you left.
2. Jason got out again. This time they found him just standing in the river. Karl roped him and got him back home quickly. They still don’t know how he’s getting out. I suggested that it was maybe time for a cow cam.
3. I keep expecting you to come through the door. I wish you would.
4. The puppies I picked up the day you left are doing well, and they’re chewing absolutely everything they can get their little teeth on.
5. Karl brought an orphaned calf over. Actually, maybe abandoned is the right word. His mom didn’t want him, which is really sad. I worry that he knows she didn’t want him. Who knows what cows know? I actually like having him around. Don’t tell Karl, though.
6. I wish you’d let me know you’re okay.
7. I should have told you the day you left that I asked Sophie to place an ad for help. I don’t know why I didn’t.
8. I ended up hiring two people because they both seemed perfect for the job. Teddy is very level-headed, a tad closed-off, but really good with the animals. Cass doesn’t shut up, and she keeps things lively around here. I think you’d like both of them.
9. Clarence is having some respiratory issues. I’m worried he’s not going to last until summer, but I’ll do what’s best for him when it comes down to it. The vet says he’s okay “for now.”
10. Last night I slept in your bed and then felt weird about it. I don’t understand how I miss you so damn much. I don’t understand how I miss you more than the people I knew my entire life.
11. I made spaghetti last night, but you not being here has ruined the sauce for me. I’m kind of mad about it, actually. I mean, you’ve tried it—imagine not liking it anymore.
12. The kitchen is coming along nicely.
I don’t think I’d realized how much time the dogs took up until I started making progress on the kitchen. Karl has been over helping now and then, and every morning I come down I’m hit by how much has changed.
“Do you want us to put the food here or in the dining room, Bennett?” Cass asks as she carries in the box Nancy brought .
“Not there,” Nancy calls out from the doorway just as Cass is about to put the box on the island. “Take it right into the dining room.” I look up and catch Nancy winking at me. I know she can’t know why I’m a bit sentimental about the island, but somehow she seems to know that I am. I’m both grateful and disturbed by this realization.
“Everything’s on the table already, thanks, Cass,” I say as she walks by me.
“This is looking great, Bennett,” Nancy murmurs quietly as she hugs me. “Karl’s pictures have not done the work justice. Then again I’m shocked I could tell what he was even taking a picture of the way he takes them.”
Karl comes in on Teddy’s heels in time to hear Nancy’s quip. “She says it like she’s got any kind of skill. Did you know until these fancy smartphones she never took a picture where at least one person wasn’t missing a head? Photo decapitation.”
“Maybe,” she says, releasing me and moving to take the bag Karl’s carrying as he takes his boots off, “that was an artistic choice.”
“Whatever you say, my love.” Karl smacks her butt as they walk towards the dining room.
Teddy is standing just inside the door, shaking his head. “You’ll get used to them,” I say, gesturing for him to follow after them. “At least that’s what Sophie keeps telling me.”
Nancy has prepared a late harvest meal for everyone, and it feels like a nice way to celebrate our first month together. When I look around the dining room table, I wonder when the last time this many people sat around it was. It would have been while both my grandparents were still alive. It’s louder than I’ve grown accustomed to, but the sounds are all joyful, and I wish that Marley were here to see it. But at the same time, for the very first time since we met, I don’t feel like she has to be here for me to exist happily in this moment.
I smile to myself before grabbing my glass and standing. “I just wanted to say a quick thank you to all of you. Cass and Teddy, you’ve surpassed all my expectations and have made me wonder why I didn’t do this hiring thing sooner. Karl and Nancy, I know a lot of what you do is because you made some blood pact with my nan, but I appreciate you sticking with it.”
“She said she’d haunt our bedroom if we weren’t there for you, and I just didn’t want to take the chance that she’d see and hear things that would haunt her back.” Karl raises his glass to mine.
Cass’s eyes are wide, and she’s staring at the turkey in the centre of the table. “You okay, Cass?” Teddy asks, leaning in.
She raises her eyes to Karl and Nancy. “Sophie said your place was haunted.” She looked back down. “That’s how she’d explain away noises at night—and once in the barn.”
My eyes slide to Nancy who is downing her entire glass of wine.
Karl, on the other hand, looks proud of himself. “Sophie likes to pretend she was the product of immaculate conception. And let me tell you, there was nothing immaculate about her conception.”
“Karl!” Nancy shrieks while the rest of us groan.
I make a mental note to add tonight’s dinner and Hore anecdotes to the list of things for Marley. I swear I can hear her laughing while the rest of us squirm.