Chapter 11
CHAPTER ELEVEN_
ANGEL
When I’m woken by the jingling of keys, I assume Jamie has gotten a call from Harley at stupid o’clock, and she’s either coming or going, but when I’m conscious enough to feel her still beside me, I’m on high alert.
I’m reaching for a weapon strapped under my bed when a figure appears in the doorway.
“Calm down,” Proxy says. “It’s just me.” There’s only one reason he’d be here in the middle of the night.
I sit up and whisper, “We got a job?”
“Spontaneous training mission, so no rush, but Trav knew you’d have your phone notifications off.”
He’s right about that. I wake so easily that I have to turn my phone off to sleep.
Trav understands if I don’t get a message late at night.
If it’s a real emergency, this is what happens.
They send someone to get me. Any of the others would’ve just banged on the door until they woke me.
Proxy has a key. Which I am now regretting giving to him.
“Make me some coffee while I get dressed.” I slowly climb out of bed, and Jamie barely stirs.
Unlike me, she sleeps heavily. Probably because she’s exhausted by the time she leaves work each night.
She throws her whole self into her work, and it’s not because she loves Harley Valentine unconditionally—although she does.
Jamie has ambition and drive, and I fucking love that about her.
I love a lot of things about her, and it’s hard to believe that it was less than a year ago I was in this very room, trying to find something to wear to go on a terrible date and whining about wanting to find “the one.” I didn’t actually believe she was out there.
Everyone else gave me a reason to walk away. Jamie … it’s as if the universe was listening and gave me everything I’ve ever wanted.
Reluctantly, I put on my gear, grab my boots, and head out to the kitchen, where Proxy’s already sitting at my dining table, sipping coffee. There’s a full cup in front of an empty seat.
“You’re the best.” If it wasn’t so scalding hot, I’d drink it down in one gulp.
“Liar. You’ve replaced me.”
I lift my cup. “With coffee? Honey, there was never a competition. It’s always been coffee.”
He places his hand on his chest. “Really feeling the love here, but no, I meant with …” He nods in my bedroom’s direction.
“You’re my best friend. She’s my girlfriend. I love you both in very different ways. Be thankful for you and your ace ass that’s the case.”
“My ass isn’t the only thing that’s ace. It’s my dick too.”
I shudder. “Don’t need to know.”
“Seriously, though,” Proxy says. “You went from zero to sixty with Jamie in two seconds. She’s more than your girlfriend.”
“What do you mean?”
“You’re living together. She should at least have partner status. Life partner? She’s lasted five months longer than any of your other … I wouldn’t even call them relationships.”
“What? We’re not living together. She just stays over a lot because she never found an apartment she liked.”
Proxy snorts. “A lot? She’s been here every single night since the Eleven tour ended. Even when you haven’t been here.”
I purse my lips. “Well, yeah, but only because I usually get someone to water my plants while I’m gone, and this way, two birds and all that.”
Proxy cocks an eyebrow at me and waits.
Now that I really think about it and try to pinpoint the last time she spent a night anywhere but my apartment … “Holy shit, we live together.”
Proxy nods. “You full-on lesbian’d her.”
I frown. “I did not.”
“Angel, baby, sweetie, honey. You became your worst nightmare, and you didn’t even know it was happening.”
“I’ve become a stereotype. Minus the U-Haul because she never moved her stuff in, but still.”
“Mmm.” Proxy sips more of his coffee. “I love your new coffee maker, by the way. Tell me, where did you get it again?”
This is a trap. “Okay, it’s hers, but she was right when she said it was better than mine, and it was only taking up space at Harley’s house in a box. It makes sense that she offered to …”
Proxy starts laughing so hard and loud that I’m sure it’ll wake Jamie up, but as I realize the coffee maker isn’t the only thing she’s brought into the house with that same excuse, it becomes apparent that she really has moved in.
She even has a drawer on her side of the bed and a section of my closet, but she doesn’t store a lot there.
Only the clothes she wears on a daily basis.
For events and things where she has to accompany Harley, like gowns and black-tie stuff, they’re all still at Harley’s house.
So, she has moved in, technically, but the question is, did she know what she was doing and manipulated the situation, or is she as big a dumbass as I am?
“C-can you tell Trav I’m sick?”
“Are you that afraid of being a stereotype that you’re making yourself physically ill over it?”
I want to roll my eyes. “No. But I need to talk to her about this, and I don’t see it being a short conversation.”
“Why does it have to be a conversation at all? You weren’t even aware you were living together. Why is it a problem if you are?”
When he puts it that way, it’s not. “I dunno. It’s like … she blindsided me.”
Proxy laughs again, but softer this time.
“If it’s any consolation, I don’t think she’s aware either.
Last time I was here, she said she had left something at her place.
I’m only pointing it out to you because even though you’re in a serious relationship, you still call her your girlfriend like you’re casually dating.
And hey, if that’s how you want to label it, I’m not going to tell you otherwise, but …
my Angel is in love, and it’s cute. Even if you’ve abandoned me. ”
“So dramatic.” Yet, I stand and wrap my arms around him from behind and lower my head to his shoulder. “I’m sorry I’ve been neglecting you.”
He pats my hand. “You don’t need to be. We’re cool.”
“Good. Now, if you’ll excuse me, I have to wake up my partner and yell at her for sneakily moving in.” I stand upright again.
Proxy sighs. “Why are you determined to screw this up with her? I wouldn’t have mentioned it if I knew you were going to react this way.”
“I’m not really going to yell at her. I promise.”
He looks relieved, but I grin.
“I’m much scarier when I don’t raise my voice at all.”
“Jesus H. Christ.” Proxy stands. “I’m getting out of here before I become an accomplice to a murder.”
“Love you, bye.”
He leaves, shaking his head all the way, but as soon as the door closes behind him, I drop the tough-girl act.
Am I actually mad that Jamie and I live together and I never noticed?
No. At least, not if she is as oblivious to it as I am.
But if she moved in on purpose and didn’t tell me, that’s something entirely different.
I approach my—I guess our bedroom—with hesitant footsteps.
Do I make a big deal out of this, or do I let it go?
I want to let it go, but it’s hard when I’ll be questioning it until I get an answer.
On the one hand, I love having her here, and I want her to officially move in, but what if I ask her and she turns around and says, “What are you talking about. We already live together”?
Come on, Angel, woman up and tell the girl how you feel.
Ugh. Feel. Emotions. All that stuff I pretend I don’t have when I don’t want to face them. The thing that usually gets me to talk about them is watching my dumbass teammates have issues with their relationships because of shit communication. I’m not going to do that.
As Jamie’s sleeping form comes into view, I almost don’t want to wake her, and that’s not my avoidance saying that. She looks relaxed, something rare for her in her line of work. Mine too, really.
We both have high-stress jobs, and it usually takes me a long time to come down from a mission, but coming home to her in the last six months has made it a hell of a lot easier to unwind.
I kneel on the floor by her side of the bed, admiring her makeup-free, smooth skin, her pale lips that are usually a signature bright red. Jamie’s beautiful inside and out. She’s perfect.
It’s in this moment, right here, that I am able to let everything go. It doesn’t matter if she moved in on purpose or if it just happened. The important thing is she’s here now.
I lean in to wake her with a soft kiss on her cheek.
She stirs, her eyes fluttering open before closing again. “Do you have to go?” she rumbles, her voice thick with sleep.
“I thought I did, but I don’t. I … I have something to ask you.”
Her eyes fly open at that, and her gaze flicks over where I’m on the floor … kneeling. “W-what are you doing?”
I join her in her panic. “Fuck, no. No, I’m not proposing.” I jump to my feet. “I was waking you up because Proxy was here, and he pointed something out to me, and I want you to know I’m okay with it.”
A cute little frown line appears in her brow. “Okay with what?”
“You. Living here.”
Her confusion doesn’t let up. “You want me to move in with you?”
“No. Well, yes, but I mean, you already live here.”
“What are you talking about?”
“Thank you! That was my reaction when he pointed it out, but Jamie, it’s true. You live here.”
“All of my stuff is still at Harley’s place.”
I smile and walk to the wardrobe, sliding open the door. “Is it?”
“They’re my work clothes, and it’s better if they’re hung up so they don’t get wrinkly.”
Hey, at least we’re as oblivious as each other.
Slowly, just as it did with me, it sinks in, and she shoots into a seated position. “Shit. I live here.”
That pulls a laugh from me. “Yeah. You do.”
“I didn’t mean to move in.”
Sitting on the side of the bed next to her, I cup her cheek. “I know. Well, I know now. I wasn’t sure if you just secretly moved all your stuff in here and hoped I wouldn’t notice. Spoiler alert: I didn’t even notice, and considering part of my job is attention to detail, you think I would have.”
“I can move out if you’re freaking out. I can—”
I lean in and kiss her again, this time, dipping my tongue inside her mouth. It’s slow and sensual, but it’s not about leading to sex. It’s about showing her how much I love her.
When I pull back, I whisper, “I want you to live here. Officially.”
“You … do?”
“I love you, and it might have happened accidentally, but you belong here. With me.”
“I love you too. And I want to be here. With you.”