Chapter 14
CHAPTER
FOURTEEN
Die?” Seymour snapped.
Sariel’s eyes narrowed. “I was under the impression that death represented a drastic transformation and not a physical death.”
“That’s in tarot. Right now we’re in Marsha land.
” Marsha tapped the card. “And this means that you could die. Maybe. Very strong possibility.” She gestured to the row of cards.
“To avoid this fate, you need to change your path as soon as you can. That will be the key to avoiding, well, you know.” She gagged and drew her finger across her throat.
Seymour grimaced.
Sariel leaned across the counter, a hint of his halo glimmering over his head. “Who are you? What are you?”
“Me?” Marsha batted her long lashes. “I’m Marsha F. Snart! Just a simple cashier at Anna Graham’s.” She grinned. “If you didn’t like my reading, maybe you should help your friend.”
Sariel glared for a long moment before stepping back and taking Seymour’s arm. “We are leaving now.”
“Fucking finally!” Seymour groaned in relief.
“Oh, just one last thing.” Marsha had a tiny burlap pouch in her hand, and she wiggled it.
“Eh?”
“Catch!” Marsha threw it to Seymour.
Seymour caught it reflexively and gave it a quick glance.
There was a tag tied around the top with the logo of the store and no other indication of what it was. With his luck, it was something that would explode.
He shoved it in his pocket. “Thanks. Bye bye now.”
“Have a nice day!” Marsha waved, still smiling from ear to ear.
Seymour let Sariel lead him outside, and he was grateful for the fresh air to soothe his aching head. It didn’t do much for his mood though, and he knew he sounded extra bitchy as he griped, “Well, that was fuckin’ fun. Not.”
Sariel embraced him suddenly, right there in the middle of the sidewalk. “Are you all right?”
Seymour tried to relax and hug Sariel back. “Yeah, just… hearin’ I’m gonna die wasn’t exactly my idea of fun. She was full of shit.” He swallowed hard. “Right?”
“I do not know,” Sariel whispered. “I do not think she was human, but she is not a being of the Celestial.”
“How do you figure?”
“Mr. Heiss has dominion over every Celestial being in the city. I am familiar with most of them, especially the more powerful ones, and she is not one of those.”
“And she’s, uh, powerful?”
“Yes.”
“Well, fuck her and her stupid readin’ right up the ass.” Seymour huffed. “I ain’t dyin’. I don’t care what Wolf King fucker or any of those cards say. I am in control of this shit coaster we’re ridin’, and we’re gonna be just fine and dandy.”
Sariel smiled. “Said like a true Aries.”
“Brave?”
“Stubborn.”
“That too.” Seymour gave Sariel one final squeeze before pulling away. He got back in the truck and quietly shut the door, trying to be extra sneaky when he saw Day was still curled up asleep.
Sariel, however, was not so sneaky and slammed his door shut as if there was a hurricane about to come through.
Day bolted up with a meow.
“Hey, lil’ girl.” Seymour cringed.
Day glared at them both. “Hi.”
Sariel grimaced and scratched her ears. “I am sorry. I did not mean to wake you so abruptly. I was not thinking.”
“It’s all right.” Day’s expression softened, and she rubbed her eyes. “Mmm, how was the magic shop?”
“Creepy.” Seymour cranked the truck. “We can tell you all ’bout it on the way to our next stupid destination. Maybe they’ll have unicorns that shit out bear traps or somethin’ equally fun.”
Sariel grabbed Seymour’s shoulder. “Unicorns are very dangerous. You should not joke about that.”
Day gasped. “No! You should never joke about unicorns.”
“Fuckin’ shit! Okay!” Seymour laughed nervously. “Mental note, do not fuck with unicorns.”
“Ever.”
“All right, all right. So, where are we headin’ next?”
“The Inferno,” Sariel replied, still looking a bit concerned. Maybe he was thinking about unicorns. “It is a monster club owned by Dagobert Baumann Von Liechtenberg. He is the vampire you met at the coffee shop.”
“Goody fuckin’ gumdrops.” Seymour forced a grin. “Can’t wait!”
“Do not worry.” Sariel squeezed Seymour’s leg gently. “I will protect you.”
“So will I!” Day slapped her paw down on Sariel’s thigh. “I’m not scared of a vampire. He’s not even hopping. Hmmph.”
Seymour’s smile was genuine now. “Oh yeah? Even if he sparkles?”
Day’s eyes narrowed to hateful slits. “Especially if he sparkles.”
“That’s my girl.”
Seymour followed the GPS and Sariel’s own directions to navigate to the club while updating Day with what she’d missed at the magic shop. To the surprise of no one, she promised to eat Marsha for upsetting Seymour should they ever see her again.
After a short burst of irritating traffic and inadvertently teaching Day some new curses, he turned into the driveway of an old building.
It was a brick car garage, but it didn’t look like it had seen customers in a few decades, given the overgrown state of the lot.
The bay doors were boarded up, but Sariel directed him to drive around.
He drove to the back as if he was going in for an oil change at any regular place not potentially full of monsters, and he came to a stop in front of the first bay door. It wasn’t boarded up, but he had no idea how they were supposed to get in with no staff present to open it.
“Okay.” Seymour tapped the steering wheel. “Now what?”
“We will be granted access,” Sariel assured him. “Soon.”
“How soon?” Day asked.
“Very soon.”
“How soon is very soon?” Seymour grinned. “Like, five minutes?”
Day wiggled. “Maybe ten?”
“How do we define soon exactly?”
Sariel frowned. “When it opens. That is soon.”
“And that will be…?”
As if on cue, the big bay door sprang to life and rolled up, revealing a giant chasm of nothing. Logically there should have been at least some light coming through from the doors at the front, but there was only darkness.
Very inviting.
Not terrifying at all.
Into the darkness Seymour drove, his heart crawling up the back of his throat. His headlights came on but didn’t help pierce the void. They should have hit the other doors by now, but the darkness kept going and going. It felt like he was about to drive them off the edge of a cliff at any second.
But then he saw the light.
Red lights up ahead, as a matter of fact, the glow of bright neons framing the outline of a large rectangular building with a big sign on top shaped like a ball of flames with writing within that said The Inferno.
Judging by the shape and angles, the club was inexplicably another version of the old garage though several times its original size. The bay doors were gone, the brick was all painted black, and the front resembled a theater with a bright marquis:
LOGAN DUBOIS RETURNS.
There was a line of people waiting to get inside, but naturally none of them were human. Big monsters, little monsters, some with fur, a few with horns, and one reptilian fellow who was so large Seymour couldn’t imagine them fitting inside.
Seymour slowly pulled up to the front, asking, “So, we park in the back or—”
“There is no need,” Sariel cut in. “The doors will—”
As soon as Seymour came to a stop, the truck doors opened by themselves. “Holy fuck balls!”
Sariel pouted. “I tried to warn you.”
“Warn faster next time! Yeesh!” Seymour stared. “So, do I… just leave the keys?”
“Yes.”
“Right. Got it.” Seymour hesitated, but then he unhooked the key from his father to tuck into his pocket. He reached for Day and then stepped out of the truck, flinching when the door closed itself.
“How strange!” Day curiously pawed the air, as if she could somehow touch whatever force was at work here.
“That’s a fuckin’ understatement,” Seymour mumbled.
“You will likely be the only human here.” Sariel curled his arm around Seymour, his hand resting on the small of his back. “Do not worry. I will keep you safe.”
“Thanks, Daddy.”
Sariel blushed, ducking his head as he led them to the door.
There was a large ox creature with brown-and-white butterfly wings standing guard, but they waved Sariel right inside ahead of the line. They gave Seymour a curious glance, but said nothing.
Day smacked her lips, staring at the ox creature as if he was a juicy snack.
Seymour hoped this place had food.
The doors opened on their own because of course they did, and the interior was dark. It was lit only by fancy gold chandeliers and more neons running along the tops of the walls. There was a stage with a sparkling piano, a handsome young brunet seated before it who was singing as he played.
It was a slow, jazzy version of Panic At The Disco’s “LA Devotee.”
Rather fitting since the singer kinda looked like that Urie guy.
The furniture was all black, the carpets too, and so was the textured wallpaper. The only spots of color were red: the neons, plush velvet tops of the barstools at the bar, the curtains up on the big stage, and the quilted ceiling.
Who the hell quilted a ceiling anyway?
Monsters, apparently.
Whatever.
It gave Seymour big Addams Family vibes, and as Sariel had said, Seymour found himself the only human in a sea of monsters. He clung to Sariel a bit tighter even as he reached up to give Day a reassuring stroke. “See, this isn’t so bad. Look. The monsters have their own goth club.”
“It is not a goth club,” Sariel whispered.
“Okay, but it looks like one,” Seymour whispered back.
Day giggled. “It really does.”
“See? Even she thinks so. It’s a goth club.”
“I believe goth piano bar would be more accurate,” a familiar voice teased.
Seymour didn’t mean to jump, but he startled Day and she dug her claws in as he whirled around to see who had spoken.
It was the goth vampire guy from the coffee place.
Day-go, Day-glow, Day-something.
“Hello, Dagobert,” Sariel greeted.
Oh.
Close enough.
“Hello, Sariel,” Dagobert drawled, grinning smugly. “Isn’t this a lovely surprise? Mr. Heiss let you off your leash.”
Sariel glared.
“Uh, hello.” Seymour offered his hand. “Seymour Madison. Sorry we didn’t quite get the pleasure before. Nice to meet ya’, Hot Topic.”