Chapter 25
Chapter Twenty-Five
Jenny
I’m rushing around the house, making sure everything is perfect. Jackson and Brody are coming to work on my shed this morning. I’m so excited to see them both again. I had such a good visit with Willow and my mother that I find I’m craving more and more interaction with all of them.
At first the attention drained my energy, but maybe some of that was shock. This is all so unexpected, but I have thanked Rachel every day for giving my son back to me. I’m still not sure why she broke our agreement. I may never know, but that’s okay. It seems to be working out for the best.
The only thing I’m feeling bad about is that some of the club isn’t so keen about my sudden rise from the dead. My mama assures me it will just take time. I don’t know if that is true. Lily and Raffe may never be able to look me in the eye ever again.
Honestly, I don’t know if I could face either of them if they did want to see me.
My fingers absentmindedly search for the necklace that once hung around my neck. You would think after all these years I wouldn’t miss it, but I do. I was thrilled to see Aspen wearing it. It healed a piece of my heart.
The timer goes off and I hurry to the stove, pulling out a fresh batch of chocolate chip cookies for my boys. I stand up abruptly at my inner dialogue. My boys?
I know I have no right to claim them as my own, but it sure does feel good knowing they are on their way up here to help me. There are so many projects I’ve needed help with. I’m sure I could have asked someone in town, but I really like to keep to myself. Or so I thought.
The sound of a truck pulling up outside catches my attention. It’s them!
I grab my skirt, pulling it from around my ankles as I rush outside. Jackson gets out of the truck with a big smile on his face. Gosh, I love him so much!
“I hope it’s okay we drove all the way in. It’s a long way from the road to haul all these shingles up.”
“Oh, that’s fine. Just fine,” I tell him, letting him pull me in for a tight hug.
It’s the best feeling in the world. I’ll never tire of it.
Brody rounds the vehicle, holding his arms open wide. Reluctantly, I let go of one to embrace the other. “Brody! I’m so glad you’re here.”
He sniffs the air as we hold each other. “I smell cookies.”
Jackson and I both laugh.
“He’s worse than a damn dog,” Jackson teases.
“You’re just jealous because my sniffer is better than yours.”
My son waves him off. “No cookies until we get all of this unloaded.”
Brody groans. “They’re better when they’re warm,” he whines.
Jackson slaps his gloves on his leg. “You got me there.” He looks at me. “Are they warm?”
“Fresh out of the oven.”
“Fine, but then we gotta get to work. I’m worried that damn roof is going to come down on Mom, and we can’t have that.”
Brody nods in agreement as Jackson puts his arm around my shoulder, guiding me back in the house. It feels so good, it brings tears to my eyes. He pulls me close and kisses the top of my head when he notices my emotion.
“No need to cry. We aren’t going anywhere,” he assures me.
I pat his chest once we’re inside. “You are too good to me.”
He and Brody both sit down, helping themselves to the treats I’ve left on the table.
I glance out the window to see Aspen run on her little legs around the bend toward the house. “You didn’t tell me Willow and Aspen were coming!” I say excitedly, hurrying toward the door to greet them.
“Mom, wait!” Jackson says behind me as I step outside.
He bumps into my backside when I abruptly halt in front of him. I’d take a moment for my heart to rejoice at hearing him call me Mom, but it has completely stopped beating. My eyes lock on a man who has just rounded the corner, chasing my granddaughter. My son’s hand lands heavily on my shoulder.
Raffe’s big palm engulfs Aspen’s tiny one as he catches up to her. “You have to wait for Papa,” he scolds gently.
“Take a deep breath,” Jackson urges quietly, his hand keeping me securely in place.
“He’s … he’s really here?” I ask, still unsure whether or not it was me who died and this is all a slice of Heaven I don’t deserve. A painful noise erupts from my chest when he lifts his head and our eyes connect.
“Breathe,” Jackson reminds me, rubbing his hands over my arms.
Raffe continues forward, his gaze holding mine.
My entire body begins to tremble as he climbs the stairs. As soon as he’s within arm’s reach, Aspen dives out of his arms and into mine. It surprises us both.
“Nana!” she squeals.
“Oh, baby, I’m so happy you’re here,” I tell her, closing my eyes. An overwhelming feeling of love explodes from my chest as I realize my entire world surrounds me. Life could not be any more perfect than it is right at this moment.
“Guess what Nana made for us,” Jackson says, gently tugging her from my arms.
Raffe is still staring at me when I open my eyes.
“Cookies!” she squeals, raising her arms in a cheer.
“Oh my gosh, you are such a good guesser. I hope Uncle Brody hasn’t eaten them all,” he tells her as they disappear inside.
“Hello, Jenny,” Raffe says when the door closes behind them.
It takes everything in me not to swoon at the sound of his voice. It’s so much deeper than it was when we last spoke.
The thought makes me tear up, and I swallow hard, struggling to keep my emotions in check. Words evaporate in the ether before I can fully grasp them, and no matter how hard I try I can’t look at him.
He runs his hand through his hair nervously and backs down a step like he’s leaving. “Um, I was just dropping Aspen off so she could spend some time with you while Jackson’s here. I should get going. It was nice seeing you again.”
I watch as he heads toward the gate. He fumbles with the latch, grumbling under his breath, “I knew this was a stupid idea.”
My heart hurts the farther away he gets. It’s as if he’s thrown a grappling hook in it, and it’s hit the end of the line. My body jerks forward as he continues down the path, and before I know it my bare feet are hurrying after him. “Raffe. Stop!”
He does, and I almost barrel right into his backside. My hands brace against his strong back to keep myself upright, and he flinches beneath my touch. I quickly step away from him.
Slowly, he turns around, and I force myself to meet his eyes. “I’m sorry. You just caught me off guard. I didn’t know you were coming, and …” I throw my hands in the air, not sure how to tell him how badly I want him to stay.
“And I’m still so damn good looking it stole your ability to speak?” he teases, and that grin I’ve dreamed of every night tugs at the corner of his mouth.
My shoulders fall at his joke, and I laugh lightly. His smile widens, and his blue eyes sparkle in the sun. “You’ve always had a way of making me forget my words.”
His cheeks turn red, and he looks away briefly before turning back to me. “It is good to see you again,” he says, and this time it doesn’t sound so empty.
“I’m glad you’re here.” I glance over my shoulder toward my sanctuary, and then back at him.
“It’s okay, I can …”
I interrupt him. “If we don’t get in there, you won’t get to try my cookies.” I lean closer to him, whispering, “Just between you and I, I think they’re even better than my mother’s.”
He barks out a laugh, and his shoulders fall too. “I can’t believe you said that out loud.” He pretends to look around us, like my mama might jump out of the bushes any minute.
I wave for him to follow me, and he quickly falls into step beside me. I smile because it feels so weirdly familiar. My heart skips a beat when I catch him smiling too.
When we get to the gate, he lets me unlatch it.
“It’s a little tricky,” I say, hoping to ease any embarrassment he feels from his earlier attempt at opening it.
His warm hand lands upon the small of my back as it swings open, urging me forward.
He touches me there again when we reach the door of my house.
Every cell in my body is jumping around like a damn fool. No part of me knows what it should be doing. All I know is that I want to lead him through more doors.
Jackson, Brody, and Aspen all look up and smile when they see us together. The three of them are shrugged back on the couch, rubbing their bellies.
“Did you save us any?” Raffe asks.
Brody points to the almost empty plate on the table. “Better get over there before I go in for round two.”
As soon as Raffe sits at the table, Jackson stands from the couch and dumps his daughter onto his dad’s lap. “Brody and I need to get to work. Her diaper bag is in the front of the truck, if you need it.” He gives her a kiss on the cheek. “You be good for Nana and Papa,” he tells her.
She nods, already shoving another cookie into her mouth.
“That’s the last one,” her dad tells her. She nods, crumbs falling from her lips.
“I’ll give her some real food. I promise,” I assure him.
I slide into the chair next to Raffe, watching him with our granddaughter. Jackson referred to us as Nana and Papa. Never in a million years did I see all of this coming. I wonder what Raffe thinks about it. Is he angry that it’s not Rachel sitting here with him and Aspen?
As if reading my mind, his eyes lift to mine. He holds up his cookie. “I hate to say it, but I think you’re right.”
It makes me laugh. “But you’re not going to admit that out loud, are you?”
He shakes his head. “That woman has snuck up on me more times than I care to think about.”
My smile fades, and I look away. “Thank you for including my parents in Jackson’s life.”
“When I got back to …” He pauses, struggling for the right word. “When I got back to life, they were all I had. My own parents were gone by then.”
An awkward silence settles between us, because what the hell am I supposed to say to that? “I’m glad they were there for you,” I finally say.
“They would have been there for you too.”
And there it is. Even though it sounds like a statement, it’s not. It’s a question. One I don’t know if I’m ready to answer.
Aspen squirms to get down. “Papa, nap,” she tells him, tugging at his hand.
He shrugs his shoulders. “Napping together is kind of our thing.” Raffe pats her little cheek. “No nap today, baby girl,” he says, remaining in his chair.
I smile at him. “It’s okay. Why don’t you both take a nap on my couch? There is a blanket and pillow on my bed you can grab.” I point to my room. “You don’t want her getting grumpy on you.”
“You’re probably right there, but …”
“We’ll have time,” I assure him softly.
Aspen hasn’t given up in her tug of war with his arm. The girl knows what she wants, and she wants a damn nap.
“I’m going to go outside and supervise.” I stand, moving toward the back door.
“Papa,” Aspen pleads, and when he looks at her, I take the opportunity to slip away.
The second I’m outside I bend over, bracing my hand on the side of the house. I inhale deeply, and then I hurry down the path on bare feet, disappearing into the forest.
I’ve got so much to tell my tree.