Chapter 26
CHAPTER TWENTY-SIX
L iving in the valley with Draper Mountain in our sights, meant the short drive only took fifteen minutes to the car lot at the top. Stepping out of the car, I inhaled the fresh air deep into my lungs and slipped Layla’s hand into mine.
Although the sun shone, a brisk wind created some fast-moving clouds. They cast shadows, which crept over the land below as they moved past the sun. As each one passed, bursts of brilliant sunshine made the color of the lush green meadows more vibrant each time it appeared. When the wind died down, and the clouds moved slowly, we had the spectacular view of crepuscular rays breaking through.
Our clearly defined plot of land was visible from the main vantage point. However our large Colonial-style house was obscured from view behind a dense woodland. Layla was very interested in the geography of her home below and pointed out some of the landmarks she recognized. After she pointed out Grace’s man-made island she fell quiet.
“Are we in the sky, Daddy?” she eventually asked.
“The sky? No, Baby, the sky is always above us,” I told her, as I tried to figure out how to explain it better.
“Oh,” she remarked sounding disappointed.
“We are on a planet… it’s like a huge ball. We live on the outside, bu t it spins all the time and there’s this thing called gravity, which you can’t see, but it keeps us from falling off. The sky is all around the ball, so it’s always above us.”
Layla looked at me like I was insane, and I could see she’d dismissed my descriptive attempt to get into the mind of a small child.
“And Heaven is in the sky, right?” she asked.
“Heaven is a place you can’t see, and it’s really far away. You don’t go there until it’s your time,” I blurted out because the thought of anything happening to her was unthinkable.
“My time?”
“What your dad means is no one knows exactly where Heaven is, Honey. That’s why it’s so special, but we think it’s an incredible place where no one feels pain or suffering, and it’s much higher than a rocket can reach.”
Layla nodded and appeared to accept this, and I glanced at Harper who shrugged and gave me a sad smile.
My daughter then began to play a game where only she knew the rules, skipping and jumping, running back and doing it again. Ten minutes after this she became attention seeking and bored.
Proceeding to use me as a form of entertainment in the absence of anything else, she demanded a piggyback ride then this advanced to sitting astride my shoulders. As we walked along like this, Harper sneakily slipped her hand into mine, and for some reason, the simple contact of them both together made me feel whole in those moments for the first time in a long time.
“Excuse me, would you mind taking a picture of us?” A short stocky couple wearing matching waterproof coats stood looking expectantly at us. The woman glanced at me as if she knew me, but I stared through her and I saw her dismiss me. Thank you, God. The last thing I wanted was anyone disrupting my beautiful private moment by talking about my band.
“Sure,” Harper agreed, taking the camera as I moved Layla and I out of the way. The couple struck a holiday snap pose, the man hugging the woman’s waist as Harper lined up the shot of them against the view of Pulaski County down in the background.
After three quick snaps, Harper checked the pictures with the couple and handed the camera back. The small woman turned and glanced up at me. “You look like someone famous… I can’t remember his name. Has anyone ever told you this?”
Squeezing Layla’s leg, I shook my head, “No, I can’t say they have,” I replied with an innocent smile.
“Well, anyway, you’re a very handsome man and you have a beautiful family.”
“Thank you,” Harper responded before anyone corrected her. “Hope you like the pictures; we need to be on our way,” she added, concluding the interaction. We turned and walked away before the woman said anything else.
“Did that woman think you were my mom, Harper?”
“I think so.”
“Everyone does. I guess it’s because we’re together all the time, huh?” Layla mused.
“Guess so,” Harper replied, not making a big deal of it.
“I wish you were,” Layla said, totally unfiltered.
Harper’s eyes flicked to mine, but she didn’t respond… and neither did I.
The conversation turned less heavy when Layla claimed she was starving. I lifted her off of my shoulders and stood her back down on the ground. Layla immediately attempted several cartwheels against a backdrop of Draper, entertaining us both, until she gave a theatrical bow and we clapped.
When Layla told us her tummy was grumbling again for the fourth time, we all piled in the car, and at her request, went to her favorite restaurant, ‘Tha Dawg House II’. It had been years since I’d visited a restaurant like it, but the food was plain, good, and wholesome. The surroundings were simple and spartan, but the atmosphere was perfect because it was empty apart from us.
“Excuse me, Mr. Harkin, my boys just love your music,” a woman gushed in a soft Southern tone. “May I ask you to sign these napkins for them? They’d be thrilled to know their momma met y’all,” the middle-aged hostess probed interrupting us at our booth. She blinked slowly as she held the napkins out .
I smiled courteously and took them from her. “Sure, what are their names?”
“Wyatt, Jordon, and Nate,” she replied, with a smile of affection at the mention of them.
“How old are they?” I asked, making conversation without looking at her as I got to work autographing the paper napkins. “Fifteen, thirteen, and twelve,” she replied.
“Oh, my. Weren’t you a busy lady?” I teased, and she glanced coyly, covered her mouth with her hand and laughed.
“Yeah, seems so,” she replied as she took back the napkins I held out and examined each of them in turn. “Thank you so much for taking the time. They’ll be thrilled when I give these to them.”
“My pleasure,” I replied, and turned my attention back to my girls. Layla looked puzzled.
“Why did you put your name on her napkins?” Layla asked.
“Because some people are strange,” I replied with a small laugh.
“Harper said you shouldn’t speak to strangers.”
“That’s right, Baby, as a child you don’t. You’ll learn all about this as you grow up. You see, because of my work, a lot of people listen to my music, and they know my name because they’ve seen me on TV. Lots more because of my concerts, right?” Layla nodded. “So, although I don’t know them, they all know who I am, and because they like my music, they want to own something I’ve touched or put my name to.”
“What? Why?” she asked incredulously with her little hands up in the air.
“I guess so they can prove they really did meet me at some time.”
Layla thought for a moment then sighed and shook her head. “You’re right, Daddy, some people are strange.”
Glancing over to Harper I saw her slowly smile, and figured on this occasion, I’d hit my pitch right in explaining away my fame as our food arrived at the table.
When Layla had filled her belly full of hot dogs and milkshakes, she yawned repeatedly.
“Are you tired, Baby?” I asked glancing in the rearview mirror five minutes after we’d gotten in the car.
“If I say no, can I stay up later? ”
“No,” both Harper and I agreed in unison. Harper chuckled and hid her reaction behind her hair.
“Well, can I have a TV in my room?”
“No,” we both agreed again, and Layla twisted her lips, her eyes narrowing in suspicion.
“Are you both having a ‘No’ day? Because if so, I can ask again tomorrow.”
Grinning, Harper and I made eye contact, but it was Harper who spoke.
“Layla, did I teach you no means no?”
“Yes,” she admitted slowly then her eyes flicked over to look at me. Glancing in the rearview mirror again she twirled her ponytail looking innocently at Harper, before looking more sheepishly at me.
“Sometimes if I ask Daddy, he says no, and if I ask him again as many times as I can, he says yes,” Layla disclosed to Harper.
“Oh, does he, now?” she replied, glancing toward me and narrowing her eyes.
“Only sometimes,” she added quickly, and it was so cute the way she realized she had ratted me out and tried to defend me again.
When Harper didn’t say anything else, Layla fell quiet and stared out of the window. I knew from her lack of questions she was done for the day. She’d been up since 6:00 a.m. and it was almost 8:15 p.m. by the time we arrived home. Killing the engine, I turned around to look at her and my sweet little girl was hanging from her booster seat like a discarded rag doll.
“Aw,” Harper and I said together in whispered voices. “Isn’t she the sweetest little girl?” I asked, sounding like the doting dad I was.
“She is. There is no malice in Layla whatsoever,” Harper agreed. Turning, she opened her car door before I could even think about helping her out of her seat.
“Harper,” I called after her. Turning, she looked with a questioning expression.
“You’re doing an incredible job with her,” I praised.
“It isn’t only me, everyone has a hand around here… and her dad’s upped his game considerably lately.” She winked.
Watching Harper as she walked around the hood gave me butterflies, because the more time I spent with her, the better I liked her. I felt as if I were seeing her through fresh eyes, or perhaps it was because the guilt that usually had accompanied my attraction to her wasn’t there anymore.
Catching my eye, she became a little self-conscious and ran her hand through her hair, licked her lips, and dipped her head so I couldn’t see her face in the low light. It was a rare lack of confidence from her, but my dick grew semi-hard in response.
“Leave her, I’ve got her,” I told Harper as I exited the car. Stepping back, she made way for me to gain access and I opened the door. Unbuckling Layla from the seat belt, I gently lifted her out and put her over my shoulder. Immediately, she clutched a clump of my hair.
My heart swelled, comforted by her touch and the feel of her little body draped against mine. “If you carry her up, I’ll change her and put her to bed,” Harper offered. I nodded and did as she asked.
Stretching lazily, I helped Layla out of her clothes, leaving her in an undershirt and panties, then I moved out of the way and allowed Harper to finish dressing Layla for bed. Tucking her bear between the sheets, I smoothed down her hair and placed her threadbare stuffed bunny under her chin.
Signaling to Harper to make for the door, we had almost reached it when we heard a small voice. “Night, Daddy, I love you. You too, Harper,” she mumbled.
Closing the door, we began to make our way downstairs.
“Thirsty?” Harper asked.
“Yeah.”
“Wine?”
“Yeah, grab a bottle and a couple of glasses; I’ll go check on the fire.
A few minutes later, Harper was curled up on the sofa next to the open fire with a large glass of red in her hand. “Thanks for today,” she said sounding grateful, “it was nice to spend time with you and Layla like that,” she added.
“Yeah, I’m trying harder to be spontaneous,” I agreed.
Harper chuckled, “The point about being spontaneous is you don’t have to try to do something, it just happens. ”
Laughing, I nodded. “Yeah, I suppose.”
“That was my world before… Grace,” I offered.
“Before you met her or after she passed?”
“Everything I did before I met Grace was spontaneous. I’m not the most organized person. Meeting Grace was spontaneous. She wasn’t in my plans for living life as an eternal bachelor,” I mused and shook my head. My voice sounded melancholic and Harper obviously noted this.
“How did you meet? I mean…”
“In a Walgreens,” I blurted out and chuckled. “Hardly the most romantic place, and I’d love to tell you some amazing anecdote about how I swept her off her feet, but it was the other way around.”
Biting her lip, I could see her absorbing my affectionate recollection about my late wife and I relaxed, relieved because she didn’t view Grace as competition.
“How so?”
“We’d been on the road for sixteen hours straight and my mouth felt as furry as a bear’s ass. I’d left my electric toothbrush at the hotel we stayed in the night before, and I guess I was being obnoxious, because I insisted the driver stop the bus so I could grab a new one.”
Glancing at me like it was the most boring story on earth, I saw Harper stifle a yawn and I chuckled. “Anyway, turned out Grace was buying a toothbrush as well, and we both went for the only one either of us would use.
“Flashing her one of my best Cole Harkin rock star smiles, I gave Grace a sob story about being on the road and it being the only brand of toothbrush I used, and Grace handed me my ass on a plate about gentlemen and manners, then suggested she arm wrestle me for it.”
We both cracked up laughing about Grace’s sass and it dawned on me it was the first time since Grace had died I had given anyone who never knew her alive an insight into the funny side of her personality.
“So, who won?”
“I did, but I offered to swap the toothbrush for a date and she accepted. Three weeks later she gave up her job and came on the road with us, and I married her a month after that.”
“Wow, so in like two months you were married?”
“Yep, and it was seven weeks too long to wait for me. I asked her to marry me every morning until she gave in.” My smile froze on my face because I’d totally forgotten who I was talking to. I gave her a small smile and shook my head. “I can’t apologize for how I loved her, Harper, she was my world,” I stated, unashamed.
“I asked the question, Cole. I’m glad you loved her so deeply. It’s good for Layla to know all of this. Who knows, maybe one day you’ll love someone else in the same way. I’m not a fool and I’m not going into this blind, but if I do this with you, I expect you to respect me.”
“You deserve the world, Sweetheart, and I know you make my heart lighter,” I said, putting my wine glass down and moving beside her on the couch. “I’m broken, we both know that, but I’d never compare you to what I had with Grace. You’re two different people and you’re the two most special women I’ve ever known in my life… after my mom, of course,” I added, and winked again.
“Wow, how did I get included in there?”
“Grace gave my baby life, and you’ve given me the child we shared today. She’s an amazing little handful so far, and both Layla and I owe that to your dedication and support. The last few years in this household couldn’t have been fun to live in.”
“That’s not the way I saw it. Maybe in the beginning… yeah. You were in such a dark place for a while, I wondered if you’d ever bond with Layla. Watching someone so heartbroken with the responsibility for a helpless newborn baby was overwhelming at times.”
Staring into her eyes, I expected to see an element of anger or some other judgment for my lack of interest in Layla as I tried to come to terms with something that shook me to my core, but all I saw was understanding.
“Thank you for all you have done for us. I’ve never really voiced it before because I don’t have the right words. For someone who used to write song lyrics all day long, I have nothing in me which would adequately describe how I feel about the person you are or what you have done for my daughter.”
For a moment Harper’s eyes ticked over my face and she shook her head. “No words are needed. When I saw you with Layla today, it reminded me of how far you’ve both come. You’re developing a beautiful friendship with Layla, and to see this, is all the reward I need. You don’t need to say the words.”
As if our gaze became too much for her, she glanced down at her lap, her hair falling over her face.
“So, this guy of yours?” I asked taking the conversation back to her.
“He’s not my guy,” she replied giving me eye contact again.
“But he’s still a sore point,” I stated.
“Perhaps, but I don’t love him anymore.”
“No?”
“No. For the first two years here I never went home. I mean who does that? Cheats on their girlfriend with her next-door neighbor?”
“Yeah, which was the main reason I figured we were a bad idea,” I disclosed. Seeing her eyes narrow, I expanded. “Not the cheating part, but you know, being attracted to you, but the thought of me fucking up the status quo here in the house made me determined not to act on it. You have no idea how difficult it’s been, and it’s the main reason now why I want to take this slowly.”
“Thank you, and I get it now why you didn’t sleep with me. You were acting maturely while I was acting on impulse.”
Cupping her chin, I leaned in and pressed my lips to hers then pulled back without allowing it to turn into more. “Exactly, but now that we’ve spoken and cleared the air, I think we both know where this is heading.”
If I could have captured Harper’s secret smile as soon as I’d shared this, I would have locked it in a box for when I got old. Delight flooded my veins, and a happy feeling settled inside my heart, as I looked forward to getting to know her better. After what happened with Grace, it was something I never thought I’d attempt again.