Theo
Kira looked up at me as we rode the subway. We hadn’t said a word since rehearsals ended, and I preferred it.
Back in that hallway, I’d said everything I could think to say, and it didn’t change a thing. Nothing did. So silence was exactly what I needed.
But, Kira broke it anyway. “Are you okay, Dad?”
No. No I wasn’t okay. But that was the last thing she needed to hear.
I wrapped my arm around her shoulder and brought her in for a hug. “You don’t have to worry about me. I’ll be fine.”
“But you’re not. You’re upset.”
I loosened my grip on the carriage rail, unclenched my jaw, shut my eyes, tipped my head back, and let out a long, deep breath.
“I’ll be fine,” I repeated, because I couldn’t think of anything else to say. Even those three words felt like a lie.
The truth was, I was devastated that Mia told me to let her go. Because I didn’t know how. And even if I did, I wouldn’t want to. That was where the lie came in.
I knew I couldn’t go from all this to fucking fine.
Maybe Kira knew it too. The rest of the way home, she didn’t say another word.