CHAPTER 24
NATHAN
“Thank God this year is almost over.”
Today has been a shitshow. I mean, it started off well. Waking up with Katie in my arms was pure pleasure. But then it was all downhill from there.
First, my mother dragged me out of bed to deal with a wedding ‘emergency’ that could have been dealt with by any of the people planning this wedding.
After I’d stupidly responded to her demanding messages, she’d sent me out on several ridiculous errands before declaring that I was to be in charge of sorting the floral arrangements at the chapel, a role I was underqualified and not the least bit inclined to take on.
I’d then spent many fruitless minutes arguing that I knew nothing about floral arrangements, that I didn’t want to be involved in this wedding at all and that I wanted to get back to Katie as quickly as possible, but when I’d seen the stubborn determination on her overly-Botoxed face, I’d known it would be easier to give in and do as she’d asked.
It seemed the path of least resistance; the faster way to get me back to the bungalow and the beautiful woman in there waiting for me.
“What did you do?” Rosie yells as she charges towards me, her face like thunder.
I stop in my tracks, quirking a brow at Theo, who’s a few steps behind her. “I’ve done many things this morning, little sis. You’ll have to be more specific.”
She punches my arm and I wince. Her fists are small but mighty.
“What was that for?” I rub my arm and sidestep her, not in the mood for her tantrums. I’ve been dealing with too many of them this morning. I’m all out of patience for my family.
“How could you do that to her?”
Rosie’s voice is thick with tears, and I glance back at her, shocked to see her chest heaving and her eyes glassy. She’s really upset.
“I don’t know what you’re talking about. Can we deal with whatever this is later? I need to see Katie.”
I’m jogging now towards the bungalow, sensing Rosie and Theo following closely behind me.
“Wait!” The urgency in my sister’s tone halts me in my tracks, and I turn to face her.
“What is it?”
Rosie nibbles on her lips. “Katie’s in there. And she’s really upset.”
My blood runs cold. “What happened? Was it Mother? Victoria? George?”
“It was you!” she yells. Her cheeks are flushed, and her small hands are clenched into fists at her side. “You did this.”
“Me?” I scramble to play catch-up. “What did I do?”
“You decided today was the day to become a two-time cheating rat.”
I scoff. “Whatever this is, I don’t have time for it. If Katie is upset, then I need to get in there and fix it.”
Rosie and Theo follow close behind me as I enter the bungalow, stopping short at the pile of luggage stacked by the door.
She’s packed? She’s leaving?
“Katie?” I charge towards where she’s seated outside, her eyes closed, shoulders drooping down. “What’s going on?”
My heart stumbles in my chest when she turns, her beautiful face pinched. “You’re back,” she whispers. “Finally.”
I glance between her and Rosie and Theo, who are loitering behind me. “Yes. I’m sorry it took so long.”
“That’s what you’re sorry for?” my sister screeches next to my ear. “How about being sorry for your shenanigans with Victoria this morning?”
Frustration rises in me, fraying my temper. “Rosie! Can you please butt out of this?”
Theo steps between us with his hands up. “You don’t speak to her like that.”
My anger drains out of me as I stare at Katie, who’s refusing to make eye contact with me. “I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to raise my voice. Please, can you give us a minute?”
Rosie’s worried gaze darts to Katie, who nods. “Fine, we’ll leave you alone.” She turns to leave. “Make sure you fix this,” she adds, then nudges Theo, and the two of them walking out of the bungalow together.
Fix what? What’s going on?
“Katie?” I inch closer to her, moving slowly in fear of frightening her away. “Can you tell me what’s going on?”
“I saw you with her,” she says after a long, long silence. “In the chapel.”
“You saw me in the chapel?”
“Yes, with Victoria.”
“You saw me in the chapel with Victoria?”
Katie’s pink lips firm into a straight line. “Are you going to repeat everything I’m saying?”
“I’m sorry. I’m trying to catch up.” My mind scrambles to remember what Katie could have witnessed. There were a few moments where Victoria got too close and batted her eyelashes like she used to, but I shut her down. “I was up in the chapel helping Victoria deal with the florist.”
“That’s not what I saw,” she argues.
I draw in a deep breath. “Why don’t you tell me what you saw, so I can tell you what it meant?”
“Fine.” She sits down, folding her hands under her thighs. I take a seat on the sun lounger next to her. “I went to look for you. You’d been gone for hours,” she starts.
I nod. It’s true. “My mother had one ‘emergency’ after the other for me to fix.” I roll my eyes, using air quotations for the word ‘emergency.’ “First, it was to wait at reception to collect the cigars my dad had ordered. Not what I’d class as an emergency, but whatever.
I was fine to do it. Then, when I got back, I had to chase up the DJ, a job apparently only I could do.
Then I was sent up to the chapel to liaise with the florist to sort out the floral arrangements. ”
“But why did you go along with it? You didn’t even want to be at the wedding. Why agree to help at all?”
I roll my shoulders to ease the tension setting in there.
“It didn’t seem like a big deal. I didn’t even notice how much time had passed.
And as you’d know by now, my mother is a hard person to say no to.
It was just easier to say yes, to do what she wanted and then get on with it.
If I’d known how it would turn out”—I wave my hand around her tear-soaked face—“I wouldn’t have gotten out of bed. I wouldn’t have left your side.”
She chews on her thumbnail, debating my words. “It wasn’t you leaving me and being gone so long that was the problem,” she says at last, her voice wobbly. “It was what I saw when I followed you up to the chapel.”
“What did you see?” I ask again.
Her spine straightens. “What I saw,” she says, “was you and your ex-girlfriend in a deep discussion. She was in your arms, and you didn’t push her away.”
Fat tears spill over onto her cheeks, and my heart shatters. Katie saw that? Panicked now, I shift closer, wiping her tears with a gentle finger.
“I’m sorry you saw that,” I whisper, longing to hold her and erase this entire wretched morning.
Her eyes fly open. “You should be sorry you did that.”
I pause and gather my thoughts. Katie had been up at the chapel and had seen that moment with Victoria and was thinking the worst. It’s bad, but given what happened next, I can fix it.
“Of course I’m sorry. None of that should have happened. I should have pushed Victoria away the minute she put her hands on me. But, Katie, at the time, I didn’t know what to do.”
“Why? Because you still have feelings for her?”
My stomach revolts at the notion. How could she question that for even a second? “No. I was surprised and didn’t know how to deal with her. We were together for so long, and I loved her once. I didn’t want to be cruel.”
“So, you were what? Humouring her?” she asks.
I stand up and pace, running my hand through my hair.
“Maybe?” I say, stopping to crouch down in front of her so I can stare into her eyes.
“In that moment, in the chapel, when she was saying those things, I felt nothing. Well, no, actually, I was sorry for my brother, the person she’s going to marry today. ”
“Nathan, she told you she was still in love with you.”
I nod, my mouth curled with disgust. “I know.”
“And she put her hands on you, and you didn’t push her away. She asked if you loved her, and you paused. You didn’t say no.”
Did I pause? I don’t remember. “I may have paused to gather my thoughts. But I did tell her I wasn’t in love with her,” I say, holding her eyes so she can see my sincerity. “You just left before that happened.”
She shakes her head, her lovely hair flying around her face and into her eyes. “But you hesitated. That means something. Especially…”
“Especially?” I probe when she breaks off, her voice trembling.
Her chest hollows out as she folds into herself. “Especially after you said you’d never be over it. Over her.”
Katie’s words bounce around in my head like she’d said them in Japanese. They made just as much sense to me as a foreign language.
“What are you talking about?”
She gets up to pace, wringing her hands as she stares off into the distance. “The night of the Stag Do? When you were drunk. You told me you’d never be over it. Victoria.”
I sink back onto the sun lounger, puzzling over her words. “Are you sure?”
“Yes! I’ve been going over it and over it in my head. And then I heard Victoria at the spa day talking about how you’re not over her and how much you want her back, and now this. What am I supposed to think, Nathan?”
My world tilts at the pain in her voice, my heart racing with my need to fix this. “I wish you’d said something earlier, Kitty Kat. I would have told you the truth. I’ve always been honest with you.”
She stops pacing. “And the truth is?”
“The truth is, I probably won’t ever fully get over it”—she gasps, and I rush to continue—“It, the betrayal. What she and my brother did cut me to the core. I’m not sure I’ll ever forgive either of them.”
Katie sits down next to me, not right next to me, but close. “I get that. I do, Nathan. No one would expect you to get over it. But what about the rest of it? What about what I saw this morning? She wanted to know if you still loved her, and you didn’t say no. You hesitated.”