Chapter 27
ALEX
“Teya! Teya! Open the damn door!”
I pace like a lunatic on the front steps of my sister’s house, heart pounding, fists slamming against the solid oak door.
“Teya, come on!” I shout again, voice cracking. “Please!”
Damn it.
This was a reckless decision. So fucking reckless.
I look up at the cloudy sky and shiver. It’s late. Cold.
I had the car service drop me off here, in Connecticut, leaving Elijah sleeping soundly in my bed.
What the hell was I thinking?
I wasn’t.
If I’d taken even one breath to think, I wouldn’t be standing here like this—heart racing, hands numb, guilt swallowing me whole.
I let my anger get the best of me. I could’ve walked away. I could’ve yelled, or thrown something, or said the million things that were burning in my throat.
But instead… I fucked him. Hard. Desperate. Confused.
Again, I rap my knuckles on the door, cursing myself for forgetting my spare key. I hadn’t wanted to wake Elijah. That’s why I slipped out quietly, grabbing whatever I could and shoving it into an overnight bag before the guilt caught up with me.
To be clear, it wasn’t my plan to leave him alone. Hell, it wasn’t my plan to leave him at all.
If anything, I wanted to stay. Wrapped up in the warmth of his arms, tangled in the scent of his skin.
But I couldn’t stop crying… or being mad… or loving him... or fucking wanting to kill him. I was a waterboard of emotions.
I shove my hand through my hair, obviously not having thought this last-minute decision through.
I should have called Teya on my way over, like any normal person would have. It’s too late now. It’s dark outside, and there’s a sharp bite to the air; the wind is picking up and moaning like a child as it moves through the trees.
Shivering, having now been standing outside for a full five minutes, pounding on the door, my annoyance is at an all-time high. Along with the blustery wind. Not to mention, my knuckles are sore as fuck. Her cell must be off because I’ve tried calling that too.
I raise my fist to the door one final time and breathe a sigh of relief when I see a light flip on in the kitchen.
Fucking finally.
The hallway light follows and then the porch, where I’m standing with a sour expression on my face.
“Alex, what the hell? Is everything alright?” Teya appears, sleep heavy in her eyes, along with surprise when she sees me slumped over in defeat, overnight bag in hand.
“Can I come in?”
She reaches out, grabs my duffel bag, and steps aside. “Of course. Come in, come in.”
As I walk down the hallway, I’m swallowed up by the familiar surroundings of home.
Floral wallpaper still decorates the walls.
It’s aged in color, and I’m not a fan of the pattern, but it brings me comfort nonetheless.
I drag my fingers along the seam of the paper as I make my way to the kitchen, where I know my sister stores her wine.
She’s already reaching for two glasses, as I head straight for the wine fridge and grab the first bottle that makes contact with my impatient hand.
“Red it is!” I declare as she hands over a corkscrew.
I fumble with opening the bottle as I’m in such a rush to get alcohol into my bloodstream. My nerves are so fried that I actually entertain the idea of ditching the glass and drinking straight from the bottle—if I can only get the damn thing open!
“I hope I didn’t wake Emilee,” I say, voice tight with frustration despite the genuine concern. I glance over my shoulder and offer my sister an apologetic smile as she quietly takes over uncorking the wine.
“Emilee’s not here,” she says, popping the cork with ease and setting it aside.
“What do you mean she’s not here? Where the hell is she?”
She pours two generous glasses of wine and hands one to me. I waste no time taking a sip.
“I dropped her off at Ana’s dad’s place a couple of hours ago.”
I exhale into my glass, dragging my fingers through my hair before rubbing the back of my neck. “I was with Elijah a couple of hours ago, T. In fact, I just left him, naked… in my bed.”
Her eyes go wide, clearly startled at my bluntness. Honestly, I caught myself off guard with that one too. If there’d been any lingering doubt about whether Elijah and I were sleeping together, I’ve now just erased it completely.
She clears her throat, a flicker of unease tightening her expression. “Um, her other dad,” she says, voice slightly shaky. “I… I forgot his name.”
“Gabriel.” I take a long sip of wine, the bitterness of his name coating my tongue like bad medicine.
She reaches out and gently places her hand on my elbow. “Alex, honey… do you mind telling me what’s going on?”
“You mean besides the fact that I’m fucking Elijah? Or that I let myself fall in love with Elijah? Or that he’s still fucking his husband?!” I snap, the words spilling out sharper than I intend. I drop my head to my hand, fingers pressing into my eyes.
God fucking damn it. I’m never this short with her.
“Jesus, Alex.” Teya’s voice is soft but shaken. Her hand trembles slightly as she reaches across the counter to refill my glass.
I stare down at the floor, shoulders heavy. “I don’t know what to do, T. I never meant for this to happen. I never expected to fall in love with him.” I pause, the truth catching in my throat. “Hell… I never expected to fall in love with a man.”
A sharp throb pulses at my temple, and I wince as I lift my gaze back to my sister. God, please don’t let this be the start of a migraine.
Her eyes are heavy as she looks at me from across the kitchen table. I tilt my head, trying to read her expression, but I get nothing. There’s something there though… guilt, maybe? Or regret? I can’t quite pin it down.
“We need to talk, Alex.”
I flex my fingers, trying to fend off the anxiety clawing at my nerves. The kind that usually ends with a migraine.
“We are talking,” I say, a little sharper than I mean to.
“I know,” she says quietly. “But… there’s something I need to show you.”
And that’s when it hits me—the look on her face. I recognize it now. Dread.
“For heaven’s sake, Teya,” I whisper. “You’re scaring me.”
She drags her hands down her flushed cheeks, short fingernails leaving faint pink trails, like claw marks. Without a word, she grabs the nearly empty bottle of wine and empties it into her glass, downing it in one long gulp.
“First,” she says, voice tight. “Tell me about Elijah.”
“Oh, come on. You already know about Elijah.”
I swirl my wine glass, watching the liquid spin, wondering if he’s still asleep in my bed… or if he’s woken up to find my side cold and his arms empty.
“I want to know more, Alex.”
“Jesus, Teya, like what?” I snap, losing my patience.
“You want to know if I like fucking him? Is that it? Well, guess what? I do. I really do. Although, if you want to get technical, he’s the one fucking me.
So yeah, apparently, I like dick now,” I bite out, making her gasp.
“What else would you like to know? Let’s see, maybe, maybe… ughhh…”
I fling my arms up in the air, then drop my head, ashamed of how I just snapped at my sister. I’ve never done that before.
I shove my chair back, sending it crashing to the floor. I kick it aside, but still manage to trip over it, stumbling and grabbing the edge of the counter to steady myself, just as tears burst from my heavy eyelids.
“I don’t know what I’m doing anymore, T.” My voice cracks as I try to breathe. “I’ve spent years focusing on my modeling career, raising my daughter, providing for both of us. It’s been me and Em for so long, and god, Teya… it’s all I know. It’s all I fucking know!”
My sister comes up from behind and hands me a tissue, then wraps her arms around my waist, resting her head gently against my back.
“Maybe it’s time you make room for someone else, honey?”
“But… a man?”
“Sure. Why not?”
I whine, voice trembling. “I don’t know. It’s just… I’ve done everything right. Walked the straight and narrow—until he came along. Until Elijah. And then I don’t know what the hell happened. Lost my focus, I guess. He knocked me right off that straight line.”
I turn my head slightly, meeting her eyes. “Obviously in more ways than one.”
I hold her gaze, feeling the unconditional acceptance there, and admit, “I love him, Teya.”
“Oh, honey. I know you do. Don’t be so hard on yourself.
Since Meera left, you haven’t let anyone in.
But now you’ve got another chance at happiness, Alex.
Your lines don’t always have to be straight.
You don’t even have to be straight,” she adds gently.
“There’s a reason for crooked roads, baby brother.
Treasures are found where few dare to wander. Take a chance, Alex.”
I can’t help but smile. My sister always knows exactly what to say to bring things into focus—to lift just enough of the weight so I can breathe again. She was my rock when we lost our parents in that awful plane crash. Christ, we were just kids. And truth be told, I was a wreck.
I don’t know where she finds her strength, but I love her even more for it.
“Where’s Elijah now?” she asks gently, her hand gliding over my arm.
“At my place. Probably still in my bed.”
“Then why are you here?”
“I don’t fucking know.” I groan, yanking on my hair like I could rip the anxiety out of my skull.
“I was on this emotional roller coaster, and I just… panicked.” My voice cracks.
“God, Teya—I walked away from him. Just like Meera did to me. No explanation, no note, nothing. I left him lying there, completely unaware of my freak-out.”
I shake my head, disgusted with myself.
“Jesus… I’m no better than her.”
She spins me around, tilting my face up toward hers. I press a tissue to my swollen, red-rimmed eyes and pull her close, wrapping my arms around her. She’s so damn small, but the strongest person I know. Gently, she wipes a stray tear sliding down my cheek.
“Do you still want me to tell you about Elijah?” I murmur, lips resting against her forehead as my exhausted mind finally begins to ease.
Her small hands cradle my face. “No, honey. Not anymore.”
She smooths her thumbs over my tear-streaked cheeks, and I blink as the wetness fades, grounded by her steady touch.
“Your tears say it all, baby brother.”