37. Nico
thirty-seven
Nico
No fucking messages.
I slam my phone down in my locker and bite back a growl in frustration.
“Damn, what did your phone ever do to you?” Heath chuckles at his locker beside me.
“Fuck the phone, you douche nozzles. We sucked ass.” Reed groans, stripping out of his shirt as he plops into his chair. We just lost to Seattle.
Reed’s not wrong. We really sucked tonight.
I sucked. Hard.
I let four guys steal bases on me; I fumbled a fucking bunt, the batter made it safely to first, and I couldn’t hit for shit.
All because I’m in my freaking head. Have been since Savannah walked out of my apartment this morning.
I’m becoming unhinged at the possibility that she won’t come back to me.
“I think it’s more than that. Care to share, Romero?” Lance asks. He’s hunched over in his seat watching me with curious eyes.
“No,” I bark.
“Lady trouble?” a deep voice asks. I turn around to find Cam, legs crossed at the ankles and leaning against the weird columns in the visitor’s locker room.
Without thinking, I blurt out, “Did Talia say something?”
The guys burst out in a round of laughter.
I flip them all two birds. “Fuck off.”
“You have a girl?” Blake asks, his jaw hanging open. “Since when?”
“Probably around the same time the fucker stopped hitting the clubs with us.” Reed rolls his eyes. That’s exactly the time Savannah came into my life.
“Give Romero a break, guys,” Heath says, putting his arm around Blake’s shoulders and giving him a noogie. “Our catcher needs our help.”
“The fuck I do. Leave me alone,” I grunt, shrugging him off.
Their help is the last thing I need. What I need is Savannah.
Cam scoffs. “Then why are you asking if Talia said something?”
“If you’re asking about her, then you’ve definitely got troubles.” Lance shakes his head as he unties his cleats.
“I don’t have lady trouble,” I lie.
I really fucking do. Savannah pushed me away and ran. And now I’m freaking the fuck out. What if I’ve fucked everything up and she never comes back to me?
I run my hands through my hair, tugging on the strands.
“Didn’t say you had lady troubles like these tools.” Lance points at the rest of our teammates sitting beside us then continues, “But if you did, we’ll listen and help.”
Reed laughs. “You shouldn’t talk, Lancy boy. You have the worst kind of lady troubles.”
“Fuck off. First, I’d have to have a lady to have lady problems.”
Reed laughs into his fist. “Pretty sure you have a blonde problem about yay high.” He holds his hand up at approximately the height of Gwen. “And her daddy signs our paycheck.”
“Fuck off.” Lance grinds his molars and scowls at Reed.
I feel for Lance. Wasn’t too long ago when I wanted Savannah and felt like I couldn’t have her. Now, I might lose her.
“You’re such a dick.” Cam punches Reed on the shoulder.
“What?” Reed rubs his arm. “I’m calling it like I see it.”
“One day,” Cam warns, and Reed shivers in disgust.
My lips twitch, but that’s the most I can give right now as I watch the two friends bicker back and forth.
“Shut up, you two. Let Romero talk,” Heath reprimands them. Being one of the oldest on the team has earned him the right to scold us as needed. He’s an amazing ballplayer and person. We all respect the hell out of him.
“Sorry, Dad,” Reed mocks.
“Well?” Cam asks, ignoring Reed.
“Fine. I have lady trouble,” I admit, dropping into the crappy cushioned folding chair between Heath and Cam. “She won’t return my texts.”
“What did you do?” Heath asks.
“My sister.” The memory of Savannah screaming those words hits me like a punch to the gut.
“Wait, who is this chick, and how did you meet her?” Blake asks. The guy’s side-eye him, and he shrugs, taking their disdain at his being nosy on the chin. “What? Don’t you think we deserve all the details?”
No.
Is my first reaction. I don’t share. Never been that guy. Not even with Damien, if I’m being honest. Never felt safe enough to talk to him about certain things. But these guys? They get it. We’re all in the same boat. Same pressures. They wouldn’t judge me if I told them what was going on.
Fuck it.
I chuckle to myself. I feel like I’ve been saying that a lot these days. But seriously, fuck it. What have I got to lose?
These guys are my teammates. They understand how shit like this can affect our game. Reed, Lance, and Blake might not know anything about women, but Heath and Cameron do. Both are happily married and might know a thing or two about healthy relationships.
“Her name is Savannah. She’s a pediatrician who works with my sister and is also my neighbor.”
“So what happened that sent her running?” Heath asks, scratching his head.
I fill the guys in on the details of this morning, leaving out the most important part of the story. I dated Savannah’s sister.
“That makes no fucking sense.” Cam shakes his head in confusion. “I saw you two together. Cozy as fuck. Why would she care if her sister knew?”
“Unless there’s more to the story,” Reed says. He crosses his arms and narrows his eyes at me.
Blake slaps his thigh, spitting his seeds into a cup. “Yes! Romero’s hiding something!”
“Where’s the shit, Romero?” Reed raises an eyebrow at me and stares as if he can break me with a look. Idiot.
“What shit?” I ask, dodging his accusing eyes. I know exactly what he means, but I don’t want to say.
Well, fuck.
I guess Savannah isn’t the only one worried about what people will say about the connection I had with her sister.
Reed leans back. “I smell bullshit. What are you leaving out?”
“What makes you think he’s leaving something out?” Lance asks.
“No woman hides the relationship she’s in without reason,” Heath says. He leans forward, elbows on his knees.
“Truth, brother.” Cam grins at me as he fist-bumps Heath. “Whatcha hiding, Romero?”
Memories of Cam and Talia hiding their relationship from me come flooding back. They hid their relationship because they knew it would hurt me. Savannah didn’t tell Charlotte because she didn’t want to hurt her.
“Fuck. Fine. Savannah is my ex’s sister.”
The group groans.
“Wait. Hold on.” Cam rubs his chin in thought. “Is this the same ex you were pissed at me about?”
“One and the same,” I admit. Cam throws his head back and laughs. “Shut up.”
Cam puts his hands up. “Not saying anything. I’m married to your sister. I have no leg to stand on.”
“Not the same.” Blake chuckles. “Everyone knows you can’t fuck the ex’s sister.”
“I didn’t just fuck her. I fell—” I cut myself off, not ready to say the words out loud. There is only one person who should hear those words first, and I might never get the chance.
“You fell in love with her,” Lance mumbles, finishing my sentence.
I refuse to say the words, but I nod. We are all silent for a minute.
“Now you understand how I felt,” Cam says, interrupting the silence.
“Yeah, yeah. I get it. Karma. Fuck off, you dick,” I grumble.
“Does she love you?” Heath asks.
“I think so.” My temples pound. I massage my head, hoping the stress of all this doesn’t trigger a migraine.
“Then you have to keep doing the things you did to make her fall in love with you in the first place,” Heath says, grabbing my attention.
“What do you mean?” I ask.
“Grand gestures.” Cam pats the spot above his heart where Talia’s name is tattooed.
I can’t get a tattoo during the season. I’m not like my idiot brother-in-law. I do that shit in the off-season for a reason.
“No, you dummy.” Heath sighs. “Do the small things. Take care of her.”
A smirk curls my lip up. “I scheduled dinner deliveries for her while I’m gone. Should I do anything else?”
Heath shakes his head. “No, that’s good. You don’t want to be too pushy.”
“I like pushy.” Blake wiggles his eyebrows.
“Stop making this about you.” Lance smacks Blake upside the head.
Reed looks one hundred percent bored as he says, “Don’t over-text. Give her space.”
“If I give her space, won’t that just push her away more?” I’ve never been in this situation before. I’m usually the one who needs space from the women I fuck. Not the other way around.
I don’t want space with Savannah.
Savannah’s everything I never knew I wanted. She couldn’t give a shit that I’m a baseball player. She doesn’t need me. She’s strong and independent. She has her own career and life. She’s so fucking good. The light to my dark. Everything I’m not. I’m lucky she even gave me a chance.
“Nah,” Reed says, leaning back like he’s an expert on the subject. “That shit only works on dudes. Out of sight, out of mind, and all that. Helps so we can fuck someone else. For women, it’s “distance makes the heart grow fonder”. They miss us when we aren’t around.”
“Sounds like bullshit,” Heath mumbles under his breath.
“How the fuck would you know?” Lance says as he looks at Reed in disbelief. I don’t blame Lance. Reed has less experience in relationships than I do. I don’t even think Reed does repeats.
“None of your fucking business,” Reed grunts.
My phone buzzes, and we freeze as a group. The fist that’s been grasping me around the chest since this morning clenches.
Cam slaps me on the back. “Are you going to look or what?”
I can feel the guys crowd behind me as I reach for my cell and swipe it open. The organ in my chest beats in my throat as I read her message.
Savannah: Thank you for dinner. Play better, baseball boy.
“Looks like you’re not totally fucked, baseball boy,” Heath teases. He gives my shoulder a tight squeeze as he and the guys back away to finish getting cleaned up before we leave for the hotel.
I ignore their musings, rereading the message again.
The air in my lungs whooshes out in relief. It’s only eight words, but they let me know she’s thinking about me.
And watching.