Chapter Twenty-One
Hayden couldn’t sleep. Armi lay beside him, snuggled into his shoulder. Every instinct in him screamed to not let this go further, that it could only end with him getting hurt.
What he’d said was the truth—no one had ever touched him like the man beside him. Whether it was that special, gentle sweetness that cracked Hayden’s tough shell or that sexy, newly discovered confidence, Armi Winters had encircled his heart and held it in his hand. But Hayden had no illusions. What did he have to offer a man like Armi? A bank account that grew modestly every two weeks? A past to worry about? No matter what Armi said, Hayden knew the truth.
He rubbed his stinging eyes. This was what he’d feared from the first. Before Armi, there’d never been a problem. Sex hadn’t been anything other than that was fun and see you as he walked away. But not with Armi. Each time left Hayden craving more. Addicting kisses, soft skin he couldn’t help but touch, and eyes like the bluest ocean, leaving him drowning in their depths.
He shouldn’t have given in to the desire licking through his blood that had him hungering for one more time. Because he could no more walk away from Armi now than he could stop breathing.
“What’s wrong?” Eyes blurry with sleep, Armi yawned and rubbed his face. “It’s three a.m. Why are you awake?”
“Why are you?” He liked Armi rumpled and rough-voiced next to him in bed.
“Really? We’re going to play Twenty Questions in the middle of the night?” Blinking, Armi sat up. “What’s on your mind?”
“You.” He pushed a hand through his hair. “And what’s happening between us.”
“Which is what?”
“If I knew, I’d be sleeping.” He chuckled, but Armi didn’t fall for it. Damn the man, he was too smart.
“Maybe you don’t want to think about it.”
“You sound like you know.”
This time Armi did smile at him. “Well, I was sleeping. And having a nice dream, too.”
“You’re mixing me up.” Frustrated, Hayden glared at Armi, who annoyingly remained unperturbed. “It’s not supposed to be like this. We were only going to have a good time.”
“We did.” Armi shifted closer. “The best time.”
That husky tone undid him, and before he knew it, Hayden’s hands were in Armi’s hair and he was kissing him until he swooned. Armi moaned under him, his rigid dick pushing into Hayden’s stomach.
“Can’t get enough of you.” Hayden panted, his fingers already teasing Armi.
“Me either. Hurry,” Armi urged. “Now.”
Hayden grabbed the lube and a condom, sheathing himself and slicking up in record time. Inch by glorious inch he eased inside Armi, burying himself fully, but instead of thrusting, he rested and leaned down, capturing Armi’s lips in a heart-stopping kiss. The thought of leaving Armi and going back to seeing him date some loser ate away at Hayden’s guts. Did he have a right to feel this way? Armi was his boss—and so far out of his league, they were in different solar systems. But Armi’s lips were soft, and his sighs of pleasure echoed in the silent room. Hayden couldn’t resist asking.
“You want to be with me? Do you really want to be together?”
Armi held him by the nape. Their eyes locked, and Hayden’s heart pounded at the intensity of Armi’s gaze.
“I thought we already were.” Armi nipped his lower lip and tugged. “I don’t want this to end after the weekend.”
Joy leaped through him, and the gnawing anxiety eased. “I don’t either.”
“I’m not going anywhere. I want to be with you, Hayden. Only you.”
Throwing caution to the wind, Hayden couldn’t deny the wildness that sprang up at Armi’s touch, and he finally conceded. “I only want you too.” He began to move faster and faster, driving into Armi, possession and hunger his companions. “Only you. No one else gets to touch you. No one else can have you. Only me.”
“You.” Armi’s head thrashed on the pillow. “Only you.”
Lips clinging, they rolled on the bed, Armi ending on top. Moonlight streamed in through the open curtains, highlighting the naked desire on Armi’s face.
“God, you feel so good wrapped around my dick.” He palmed Armi’s shaft and rubbed him from root to tip while digging the fingers of his other hand into the creamy white skin of his hip. “Hot and tight.”
Armi rode him, and Hayden lost himself in the fiery brilliance of Armi’s eyes. The sheer force of his climax lifted him off the bed, and he jerked and twitched as Armi squeezed his throbbing cock. Armi followed a minute later, his release spattering across Hayden’s abs and chest. He cuddled Armi close, still inside him, and kissed his cheek.
“Mine,” he whispered when he could gather his breath to form words. “You’re mine.”
**
“Well, that was a day and a half,” Hayden joked as they boarded the plane for home. Even though he’d become accustomed to flying private with Boris, he still got a thrill that this was his life. Even more so now because it was with Armi.
They’d spent the weekend working, watching the game in Alabama, then heading to Georgia right after for the game the following afternoon. As he’d suspected, Russell had booked a single room with a king-sized bed at that hotel too. Not wishing to get into a discussion with Armi about it while they were busy with football, once they’d settled in their seats for the flight to Teterboro, Hayden couldn’t help but bring it up.
“Are you going to say anything to Russell tomorrow?”
Armi had been gazing out of the window as they sailed past puffy white clouds. He had a strange, almost wistful expression on his face.
“I don’t know. He’s got a lot more on his mind than the hotel rooms.”
Was he really going to make excuses? “I mean…yeah, but it’s a broken ankle. He’ll heal. What he tried to do to you was wrong on so many levels.”
“I know. But does it matter now?”
“Why wouldn’t it? He tried to take advantage of you.” A question he hadn’t thought of sprang to his lips, and before he could think, Hayden blurted it out. “Would he have succeeded?”
Brow furrowed, Armi turned a confused face to him. “What’re you talking about?”
“Forget it,” he mumbled. “I didn’t mean it.”
But Armi was persistent. “You did. Do you still think I would’ve slept with him, that I’m so easily manipulated, I would’ve done anything he wanted? I thought we settled that.”
Tension crackled in the air between them as they stared at each other. Hayden broke the stalemate. “No, I’m not saying that. Really. But I hope now you see how devious he is. He planned this whole seduction thing to get you into bed.”
“But I don’t want Russell. I want you.”
Those three simple words hit him so hard, they left him breathless.
Armi reached out his hand, and Hayden took it. It was all so new to him, this feeling of belonging, of caring for another’s emotional well-being as much or even more than his own. Knowing how kind and nonconfrontational Armi was, how he didn’t like hurting anyone, Hayden was ready to step in and guard Armi from abuse.
“I want you too.”
Armi’s smile lit his face. “Then there’s nothing to worry about.”
Hayden knew that was being overly optimistic. He needed to be on guard at so many levels—his past, Russell’s manipulations, and Armi, who remained frustratingly optimistic and generous with his time and heart. Hayden was happy to play the watchdog.
Once they landed and were in the car on the way home, Armi seemed nervous. “Uh, do you want to stay the night? With me, I mean?”
Damn, he was sweet. “As much as I’d love to, I need to go home. I don’t have clothes to wear. I can’t show up to the office in shorts and a T-shirt.” He leaned in close to kiss Armi. “But ask me another time, and I’ll be prepared.”
“You can come anytime.”
He grinned. “Only with you.”
With a roll of his eyes, Armi groaned. “God, that was bad.” The car stopped in front of his apartment, and he kissed Armi again.
“I’m going to miss sleeping with you tonight. I like having you next to me.”
“I like it too.”
The trunk slammed shut. “I’d better go so your driver doesn’t have to wait. See you tomorrow.”
“Yeah.”
Another quick brush of their lips, and he left Armi. He stood on the sidewalk, watching the car roll away. It had taken every bit of his strength not to agree to stay, but he needed some space to process the weekend.
Or so he thought, because he’d only had time to walk inside his apartment and set his mail and keys on the counter when his mother called.
“Hi, Mom.” He shuffled through the advertisements and was grateful he’d moved all his other accounts to online billing. He was also starving, since he hadn’t eaten anything on the plane but a couple of cheese cubes, so he opened his laptop and ordered sushi. “What’s up?”
“I’m putting you on speaker so your father can listen too. You haven’t called in a while. We’ve missed you.”
“Ah, sorry. Things have been crazy.” Guilty, he sat and put the laptop aside. “I was away for the weekend.”
“Business or pleasure?”
His lips twitched. The pleasure had sure outweighed the business. “Both. I went with my boss to scout college players.”
His father laughed. “No offense, Hayden, but what do you know about football?”
I know a tight end, and Armi’s got the best.
Of course, he couldn’t say that out loud. “I was there to help Armi by taking notes on everything the scout said. He needed me there, so of course I went.”
“So the job’s working out? You’re enjoying it?”
“Yeah. I really am.”
“And the benefits are good?” his father asked.
You have no idea.
“Uh, yeah. They’re very generous.”
“That’s good. I’m glad you landed on your feet. We know how tight the job market is, especially in New York, and how expensive it is to live there.” His mother’s worry always triggered guilt over what he’d put them through.
“It’s fine. It worked out. You don’t have to worry about me. I’m thirty-seven. I’m not going to make the mistakes I made at seventeen.”
“Who said you were? But news flash, sweetheart. We’re never going to stop worrying about you. We’re your parents.” His mother sniffled. “All we want is for you to be happy.”
Having seen how Armi’s father had destroyed his self-confidence, Hayden knew he was so damn lucky to have them in his life. “I am, I promise. I have my apartment, and a new job that’s working out. What more could I want?”
“Someone to share it all with?”
That hopeful note in her voice caught him in a weak moment, or maybe it was the lack of sleep from the weekend, but he slipped. “Maybe I’ve got that covered too.”
“You do? You’re seeing someone? Who? Who?”
“Are you my mother or an owl?” he joked. “Seriously, though, it’s new. I don’t really know how it’s going to play out.” Not the truth because Armi was his and no one else was going to have him. When he’d turned into this overprotective, possessive person, Hayden had no idea, but that’s the way it was.
“But this is the first time you’ve told us about someone. So he must be special.”
In the mirror he caught himself wearing a dopey smile, but he didn’t care. “Yeah. He is. Totally not the type I thought I’d ever be attracted to, but I think that’s the way it goes in our family.”
“Very funny,” his mother said, and his father laughed.
“You’re correct, my boy. But your mother has held my heart for close to forty years, so I’m thinking it was the right move on my part. So is this like father, like son?”
“Could be.” The buzzer sounded. “My dinner’s here. I gotta go.”
“We’d love to meet him. Maybe we can come for a visit.”
“Sure, come visit anytime. Talk to you soon.” He ended the call and hit the buzzer. The doorbell rang, and he opened the door to see a grinning Armi standing there, holding a delivery bag and his duffel.
“Dinner?”
His jaw dropped. “What? Is that my sushi?”
Armi held out the bag, and Hayden took it. “Yeah. I told the guy I was going to your apartment and gave him a fifty, so he was happy to let me personally deliver it.”
“Uh, come in.” Armi passed by him and sat at one of the barstools by his countertop that doubled as an island and his table. He’d changed from the plane, and his damp hair curled at his neck. He smelled and looked fucking delicious, and Hayden’s defenses, already weakened, crumbled. “I can’t believe you’re here.” Hayden set the bag down and leaned on the counter, looking at Armi, who flashed him a nervous smile and blushed.
“I got home and showered and thought it was stupid, you being here and me in my big house alone.” He clasped his hands. “I hope…you don’t mind. Do you?”
The man was too adorable. “You’re kidding, right? I was just going to eat my dinner while typing up the notes I took over the weekend for you.”
Armi frowned. “You shouldn’t be constantly working. Dinner is for eating, not working.”
As Armi spoke, Hayden unpacked the food. “I have three rolls here. We can share. And I don’t mind. I always work during dinner.”
“Even when I’m here?” A tiny grin curved Armi’s lips. “Are you sure?”
“Mr. Winters, are you flirting with me?” Hayden slipped his arms around Armi. He bent to kiss Armi by his ear, loving the sharp intake of breath.
“Would you mind if I was?”
“Does it look like I mind?” Hayden continued kissing him, and Armi hummed his appreciation, arching into his touch like a contented cat. “I like it. A lot.”
“Sooo, do you still have to work through dinner?” Armi toyed with the chopsticks. “Or is there any way I can talk you out of it?”
He picked up his chopsticks and the tray of sushi. “Come. I watched a show where someone ate sushi off a naked person.” Armi turned bright red, but Hayden didn’t miss the spark in his eyes. Hand in hand, they walked into the bedroom.