Chapter 10
Bear
The chaotic rowdiness of the clubhouse is a sharp contrast to the quiet of the hospital.
It’s also a brutal reminder that although my best friend in the whole world is fighting for his life, the world continues.
The only thing I can do for my best friend right now is step up, protect his sister, and help her not fall into a fuckin’ depressed state.
And help my club brothers track down the fucker that cut his brake line and make damn sure they aren’t able to do that shit to anyone else.
I can tell Natalie is feeling this too. Her expression is hurt, looking around the room at everyone drinking and shooting pool. Instead, I move over to the bar and rest my forearms against the worn wood. The prospect behind the bar looks up, “What are you and Miss Natalie drinking tonight, Bear?”
Natalie takes the stool beside me. I turn to her and ask, “What are you drinking?”
“Whatever you are,” she deadpans back.
I glance sideways at her. “You don’t drink much. I’ve noticed that.”
“True, that’s why I trust your taste more than mine.”
Her innocent trust makes me feel good, and feeds my ego, if I’m being honest.
“Two amarettos, please.”
The prospect can’t keep the smirk off his face, because my club brother sees that as a women’s drink. I don’t care what he thinks. I just want to see if Natalie likes the drink I picked with her in mind.
Two glasses appear on the bar. I slide one towards her and watch her take the first sip. Her eyes light up and she quickly takes another sip.
“This is really good.”
“It’s made from apricot pits, if I remember correctly.”
“You have good taste,” she comments before taking a larger drink.
The club settles around us. Music hums low through the speakers. The noise feels ordinary again, and I realize how rare that’s been today.
Then I catch sight of Jewel. My least favorite club girl is subtle but relentless. I had a thing with her six months ago, before I realized she was trouble. I turn my head slightly and see her approaching.
She moves like a woman on the prowl. Her long sleek hair is swaying behind her slim shoulders. She always wears a confident smile and some shiny shit on her lips that looks like oil. It’s extremely off-putting. She stops beside me like she’s done a hundred times before.
“Didn’t think I’d see you back tonight,” she says cheerfully.
“It’s been a long day. I’m tryin’ to relax a bit before I hit the sack.”
Her smile takes on a sly turn. “I heard about Rick’s accident. Your boy’s tough. He’ll make it.”
I lift my glass instead of answering. I don’t appreciate the club girls gossiping about Rick. To her his unfortunate situation is just a conversation starter. And that pisses me the fuck off.
Her gaze flicks briefly towards Natalie, then returns to me. “You look like you could use something better than amaretto. I’d be happy to help you out with that, big boy.”
I set my glass down and turn to look at her. “We already decided that I would come to you if I wanted to spend time with you and I haven’t.”
She doesn’t flinch. “Tonight’s exactly when you should say yes. You need to blow off steam with a woman who can handle you and you’re too proud to ask. That’s why I’m offering myself up to you.”
I meet her eyes, figuring if I shut the door forever, she’ll finally get the message. “I’m saying no. Not tonight. Not ever. No matter how many times you offer, the answer’s always gonna be no.”
For a moment, something dark flashes through her expression. Then she laughs, masking it with practiced ease.
“Suit yourself,” she says, her perfectly manicured fingernails tapping the bar near my hand. “If you change your mind, you know I’m always up for a laugh or two.”
She walks away with the same fake confidence she arrived with.
I don’t watch her leave. I look at Natalie instead.
She’s studying me, not the club girl. “She’s a persistent one,” she says. “I think she’s playing the long game, hoping you’ll cave one day, and she’ll end up becoming your old lady.”
I lift a brow slightly. “I fuckin’ doubt that. I’m not rich, handsome, or a club officer. She ain’t got nothin’ to gain by being my old lady.”
“You’re easier on the eyes than you think.”
I snort a laugh but don’t say anything because I’m too busy fightin’ off the blush creeping up my face.
Natalie continues, “You also own your own business, so you’re not exactly poor.”
“Rich is when your money works for you, not when you work for it,” I remind her.
Natalie’s brows furrow as she stares at me for a second before responding. “Did it ever occur to you that she might actually like you as a person. That’s possible, right?”
“It’s possible, but not fuckin’ likely. She’s not like us.”
She takes another sip of her drink. “What do you mean by that? What are we like? And why is she different?”
I drain my glass and motion to the bartender for another before turning to face her.
“You and I were raised in care. Asked ourselves why parents didn’t want us enough to get off drugs and get their lives together.
We wondered if we were made of the same fuckin’ flawed material they were.
Your brother and I used to talk about this stuff all the time.
“And what conclusion did you come to?”
“That we’re different because we know we’re not entitled to anything in life. We always knew that we’d have to work for whatever we got. We value every bite we put in our mouths, the warm bed we sleep in and personal freedom in a way that other people can’t.”
Natalie’s expression turns admiring. “I’m not going to say you’re wrong about any of that because I’ve gone through a lot of those feelings as well. I think you and my brother are smart for figuring all that out. It’s usually the below-the-surface stuff that nobody ever talks about.”
“Yeah, well Rick is the brains of our operation. He’s so fuckin’ smart, like you.”
She holds my gaze without blinking. “I don’t see any difference between you and us.”
I study her for a moment. Natalie is a beautiful woman.
I like how calm she is about things like club girls and learning how our business works.
The only thing that really ruffles her feathers is things that have to do with her brother and sometimes me.
She’s protective of us in her own way. And no matter how much I try and shut that shit down, I want her.
Want her in a way I’ve never wanted another woman.
“I don’t like her, Nat,” I say. “I do like you though.”
“Good, I’ve been gunning for the job as your old lady.”
I spit my drink out, choking a bit. “What did you just say to me?”
Natalie shrugs lightly. “Don’t act like you didn’t know that.”
I exhale slowly through my nose. If anyone else had told me Natalie wanted to wear my property cut, I wouldn’t believe it. But this came straight from the horse’s mouth. And her expression is as serious as a heart attack.
Just when I realize I’m at a loss as to how to respond to that, she changes the subject on me.
“Do you think we’re bad people for drinking and chatting while my brother is hooked up to life support?”
I freeze with my glass halfway to my mouth.
Her words feel like a damn gut punch. I struggle to find the words to respond.
“Well, I’ve thought about that myself. I can’t say it feels right.
But there’s nothing we can do right now.
I don’t have anything he needs to get better, and the hospital won’t let my hefty ass sit in ICU with him.
I would love to just be there for him. But he needs doctors and nurses right now, not an overbearing best friend to hassle the doctors and nurses all the time. You know?”
She nods but I can see she’s blinking back tears. She covers it by drinking down the last of her amaretto.
I hold out my hand to her, “Come on,” I say. “Let’s head upstairs and hit the sack. I wasn’t fuckin’ joking about it being a long day.”
Natalie glances at me. “Are you saying I need my beauty sleep?”
I snort a laugh, tugging her off her stool. “No. If you were any more beautiful, I’d spend all day beating the club brothers off you with a stick instead of just catching the brazen ones out back.”
She doesn’t hesitate to take my hand and comes with me. She seems more amused than offended by my little joke. Of course she doesn’t realize it’s not an actual joke.
With Rick in hospital, I’ve moved into her suite, taking his room.
The minute we’re inside the suite I go to take a shower.
I need space, because now that she said it out loud, I’m obsessed with the idea of Natalie becoming my old lady and I need to stroke one off to the image of her running around in my property cut.
If I don’t get rid of the sexual frustration, I might do something stupid like make her wish come true.
Steam fills the bathroom quickly as I stand at the sink with my hands braced against the counter.
She said I was easy on the eyes. I can’t get my head around that.
I’ve always been seen as a gigantic problem, literally.
They said I was too big for as long as I can remember.
Not one single person ever said I was easy on the eyes.
Looking in the mirror, I can’t see it, so I guess she was just being nice.
When I push back off the sink and pull my t-shirt over my head, I realize that Natalie is watching me from the doorway.
Standing there with my shirt in my hand, I feel exposed, like she knew I came running to get a cold shower because of her. Now she’s behind me staring at the Savage Legion MC club tattoo covering my back and I can’t help but flex my muscles a little.
“You don’t have to hover in my peripheral,” I tell her. “If you’ve got something to say, say. I don’t bite.”
“Well, I actually do have something to say.”