Chapter 3
Chapter
Three
ANYA
“ W hat the hell were you thinking?” my father hisses the moment George brings Nadia and me back home. “Trying to escape? Seriously?”
He grabs my arm and drags me toward his office. “Don’t hurt her,” Nadia cries out, but he ignores her.
He shoves me into his office and slams the door behind us before grabbing my jaw and forcing me to look at him. “You are going to marry Erik, and you are going to smile when it happens. I have worked too hard to get where I am in life just to see you fuck me over.” He shakes my face.
“I don’t want to marry him,” I say, even though it’s hard to speak around his hand on my jaw.
“You seem to think you have a choice in the matter. You don’t. I don’t care if Erik is the fucking devil himself. You are marrying him. And you will be happy about it. And you will make me proud. Or I will force your sister down that aisle instead.”
“She’s only seventeen.”
“So?”
For a moment, I thought I could escape. I let myself dream it. Believe it.
But this is my reality—my father’s hand on my face and my impending doom.
Nadia doesn’t deserve this fate.
So, I have to take it for her.
“Fine,” I grit out. “I’ll marry him. I won’t put up a fight.”
“Of course, you won’t. You’re not going to leave this house once until the wedding. So, buckle up, Anya. You’re going to marry Erik in a couple of days. And I only want to see a smile on your face.”
He finally lets me go, and I stumble backward. My father and I stare each other down for a moment before he huffs and storms out of his office. He always storms everywhere in fits of anger. Nadia will be left alone with him while I’m married to the boogeyman.
I’m not sure how either of us will survive.
The wedding day comes way too soon.
A couple of days are long when you’re forced to spend them inside your room with nothing to do but think about your future.
In a way, I’m grateful I finally get to leave, but I don’t think my life will get any better.
The wedding dress I chose hangs on the outside of my door. Well, at least I get to wear the dress I liked. That’s the only saving grace in this entire thing.
Our housekeeper, Carmen, helps me get dressed and does my hair.
“You look so beautiful,” she tells me once we’re done.
I gaze at myself in the mirror. My red hair is around my shoulders in soft curls. My makeup is soft and minimal. And my dress looks perfect on me.
The perfect bride for my husband. My scary, evil husband whom I’ve never even met.
Carmen walks me out to my father, who’s waiting by the front door with George and another of our guards, Daniel. Nadia is beside him, looking terrified.
“Doesn’t she look beautiful?” Carmen asks.
My father only sneers. “Let’s go.”
I force my feet to follow him out the door, and the moment I’m in the car, I know there’s no turning back now.
The wedding is held in an old, gothic cathedral. I’m already shivering before I even step inside.
I sneak a peek into the nave where a large group of people sit. “How many people did you invite?”
“All of my men and their wives. Erik invited many of his contacts as well. This is a union to bring two families and business together. This needs to be a spectacle, Anya. So, don’t fucking ruin it for me.”
Nadia is already inside, seated at a pew in the front row. We weren’t even allowed to talk to each other on the ride here.
Father grabs my hand roughly and shoves it into the crook of his arm. Music swells, and the doors open all the way, revealing the full spectacle of the church and all the people inside.
But none of that catches my attention.
What catches my attention is the man standing at the end of the aisle. The one in a blue navy suit. The one with a piercing gaze and dark eyes and a mischievous smirk. The one standing next to the priest.
The man who’s clearly Erik Koslov.
My body goes rigid at the sight of him.
For one thing, he’s a lot more handsome than I thought he’d be. Brown hair, five o’clock shadow, broad shoulders, good features. At least he won’t be hard to look at.
But I’m not sure any of that is a consolation if he’s going to beat me like my father does.
As I walk down the aisle, my eyes catch Nadia’s. She looks like she might cry or scream or run away. She does none of those things, though. Instead, she remains quiet and watches while our father sells my life away. I don’t blame her. The last thing I want is for my sister to get hurt for trying to help me.
I reach out to her, and she does the same, but our father rips me away from her, causing me to stumble. None of the guests comment on it. It’s not customary for any people within the Bratva to comment on the inner workings of a family. People are used to turning a blind eye.
My fate brings me closer to Erik.
I give Nadia one last look before turning to the man who’s going to be my husband in a matter of minutes. Father grabs my hand and forces it out so Erik can take it.
Erik’s grip is strong and secure. I’m not going anywhere.
I’m trembling. It’s clear from the way Erik’s smile deepens that he can feel it. And he likes that I’m afraid. We haven’t said one word to each other, and already, I can tell his reputation is true: He’s a bad man.
“We are gathered here today,” the priest begins while everyone takes their seats. I drown all of that out as I look at Erik. I study his dark eyes. There are multiple flecks of brown in them. They would be warm on anybody else but him. Not when he’s the boogeyman.
My body goes numb the longer the priest talks. The only thing keeping me standing is Erik’s hands covering my own. How ironic is that.
And then, it happens.
The vows.
“Do you, Erik Koslov, take this woman to be your lawfully wedded wife?”
Erik looks me straight in the eye as he responds, claiming me as his own. “I do.” His voice is warm and rich. Smooth in nature. But there’s a hard edge to it that tells me I can’t trust him.
The priest turns to me. “And do you, Anya Belov, take this man to be your lawfully wedded husband?”
“No,” I whisper on instinct.
The crowd murmurs.
Erik doesn’t even look upset. His grin only grows.
My father looks like he might jump out of his seat and smack me for saying no, but he stays seated. And that’s when I notice him gripping Nadia’s arm. I don’t have to feel it myself to know it must hurt. He’s hurt me enough times for me to know.
“You’re not supposed to say no,” the priest whispers back.
“It’s ok,” Erik says in his handsome voice. He truly is the devil—a handsome exterior hiding a darker nature underneath.
“It’s ok?” I ask.
He nods and leans in closer. “But, Anya, this is will happen. I made a deal with your father for power, which included marrying you. So, you’ll take back your no and say I do.”
A flare of anger courses through me. “And if I tried to run right this second?”
“I would just chase you. You’re not getting out of this, I’m afraid. But you have the chance to be brave right now. Just say I do.”
I gulp. “Will you hurt me if I don’t?”
His hands tighten on my own. “Will I beat you, you mean?”
I don’t give him a verbal reply. We both know what I mean.
Erik tugs me closer to him. “No, I won’t beat you. I have no desire to ruin your pretty face.”
I shiver. I’m not sure if it’s out of fear or relief.
But then Erik keeps talking: “But you will be mine, Anya. If you try to break the deal your father and I made, it won’t end well for him.”
“I don’t care about him,” I blurt out without thinking.
“No?” He slides his gaze toward my father and Nadia. “Well, then, how about your sister?”
Everything inside me goes cold. “My sister?” I can barely move my lips.
“It won’t end well for your entire family if you don’t marry me right now. I think you know this. You’re a Bratva daughter. You’ve been raised in this life. I can break the deal I made with your father right this second, and all hell will break loose in a matter of minutes. But I want to enjoy my wedding day, and I think you do, too. So, just say ‘I do,’ and nothing bad needs to happen.”
I can feel the energy radiating off him, like he’s hoping I’ll disobey him so he can cause bloodshed.
Well, I can’t let that happen. I can’t risk Nadia getting hurt.
Escape is impossible at this point. It’s my duty to my sister to keep her safe, and if marrying Erik will do that, then I have no choice.
Standing up straighter, I square my shoulders. Erik’s eyes gleam with delight as I say the words that will seal my fate forever.
“I do.”
There’s a visible exhale from the priest before he says, “I now pronounce you husband and wife. It’s time to exchange your rings.”
A man hands Erik a box, and when he opens it, I see two simple wedding bands nestled inside. He takes my hand and slips my ring on my finger, silently claiming me as his.
Then he hands me a ring.
I hold onto it. I have to put this on Erik and essentially claim him as my own. But I don’t want him. All I want is for my sister and me to be safe.
My eyes flick to her worried face. I’m doing this for her, I remind myself. Marrying Erik is the only way to keep her safe.
I try to keep my hands from shaking as I put the ring on Erik’s finger, but my hands tremble anyway. Erik’s fingers skim against mine, causing goosebumps to break out on my skin.
I let go of his hand the moment the ring is on.
But it’s not over yet.
“You may kiss the bride.”
I startle at the priest’s words. It never even crossed my mind that I’d have to kiss Erik, but it should have. I’m going to have to do a lot more than kiss him soon. That thought makes a dread form in my stomach like heavy cement.
Erik takes my face between his strong hands and lowers his lips to mine. I hold very, very still.
And as soon as the kiss begins, it’s over. It only lasts a couple of seconds.
But I have to admit—his lips didn’t feel terrible on mine. And yet, I’m left feeling ice cold.
Erik re-grabs my hand and turns us to our guests. They all cheer for us as we walk down the aisle. Erik is smiling. but it’s not an excited, happy smile. It’s a dark, mischievous smile like he’s thinking of more. More of what I have no idea, but I just know in my gut that it can’t be good.
I turn to Nadia and see tears falling down her cheeks. I try to go to her, but Erik forces me to keep walking forward.
“This is our day,” he murmurs. “Not your sister’s.”
“She needs me,” I hiss.
“She’ll be fine.” His tone is so dismissive it makes me flinch.
“You don’t know anything.”
Erik glances at me with a surprised upturn of his eyebrows. “Then enlighten me.”
I could tell him how my father beats me or how I’m scared he’ll do the same to Nadia, but I get the sense telling Erik anything vulnerable and honest will not end well. He might use it to his advantage, and I can’t risk Nadia getting more hurt.
So, I stay quiet and keep my gaze locked ahead of me. I can feel Erik looking at me before he finally turns away.
We leave the church and walk to a car out front that will take us to the reception.
Erik opens the back door for me. I don’t want to turn my back to him, which I know is irrational. He’s not going to murder me on my wedding day—not with all our guests standing outside watching us leave.
Erik keeps his steady, intense, intimidating gaze on me as I finally get the courage to slide into the car. He gets in beside me and shuts the door, muffling the cheering of our guests.
A man gets into the front seat and drives the car away from the church. Thank god we’re not alone. For now. But soon, once the wedding is over, I’ll have to be alone with Erik, and that’s not something I’m sure I’m ready for.
“You did good back there.” His voice startles me.
I don’t know how to reply to that, so I just stay silent.
“A lot of people would’ve run kicking and screaming from me. But you didn’t. Why didn’t you?”
My throat is dry as I talk. “You threatened the life of my sister, remember? That tends to make people comply.”
He raises one perfectly groomed eyebrow. “Interesting. So, you care about your sister.”
“She’s my sister.”
“Not everyone cares about their siblings.”
“Do you?”
“I don’t have any, so I can’t say I do. But I wasn’t talking about after I threatened your sister’s life. I was talking about when you were walking down the aisle. You didn’t run then. Why not?”
“Because it’s my duty to marry you.” The more I talk, the less afraid I become. If I can just keep Erik talking long enough, then maybe he’ll never get the chance to hurt me.
“You’re a good girl, then?”
I force myself to look at him. “I’ve never dated, if that’s what you’re wondering.” It’s common custom among the Bratva that girls are virgins until their wedding nights. My father never let me date, and I never tried to. If I had, I probably would’ve been beaten to within an inch of my life.
“That wasn’t what I was wondering, but good to know. Your father made it clear you were a virgin. Glad to know I wasn’t lied to.”
I shudder. “You’re disgusting.” The words come out before I can stop them.
Instead of getting angry like I thought he would, Erik laughs. It’s not a humorous one. It’s filled with utter darkness. “I’ve been called many things in my life, but disgusting is not one of them. The boogeyman. The devil. Plain evil. But never disgusting.”
I stare out the window without a word. I’ve learned from my father that if I backtalk, I get hit. I don’t want to take the risk that Erik might be the same.
“Why disgusting?” he asks. When I don’t answer him, he places his hand on my thigh, making me gasp. “Anya, answer me.” He doesn’t grip my leg hard. In fact, he doesn’t grip my leg at all. His hand is just resting there, silently telling me he wants my attention.
I lick my dry lips but keep my eyes glued to the window. “It’s disgusting that a woman’s value is in her virginity.”
“I agree.” His words shock me so much that I turn to face him. “But I don’t make up the rules,” he continues. “It’s expected that you’re a virgin because it’s how it’s always been done. I want my children to be mine.”
I scrunch up my nose. “They have DNA tests for that.”
“True. But this is more fun.” He flashes me a charmingly dark grin that makes my stomach flutter. It’s unsettling, is what it is. “Now, tell me, Anya, how am I disgusting exactly? Are you not pleased by the way I look?”
“I don’t want to talk.”
“Why not? We’re married now. Shouldn’t we get to know one another?”
I look at him more closely. “Do you really want to get to know me?”
“Honestly? I don’t care about you at all. I only married you for the connection to your father.”
His brutal honesty makes me flinch. “So, then, why even talk?”
“Because now that I’ve met you, I’m fascinated. I can tell you’re afraid.”
“I’m not afraid.”
“You’re afraid. It’s ok. I know the reputation I have. I would suspect you’re not human if you weren’t afraid of me.” His thumb traces circles into my thigh. The satiny fabric of my dress keeps sending goosebumps over my skin. It’s all I can think about. His hand on my thigh. How powerless I am.
“But,” he says, “you’re also not as afraid as I thought you’d be, which I find intriguing. Why did you not back away down the aisle? Are you just as power hungry as I am? Wanted to marry a wealthy, successful Bratva man?”
“I don’t care about those things.”
“No? Everyone cares about those things.”
“Well, I don’t. I wish I’d never been born into the Bratva. If I were just a normal girl, I’d have more freedom.”
“You don’t know that for sure.”
“You’re right. I don’t,” I say. “But there has to be some truth to it.”
“You could’ve been born into a religious cult that tied you up in a basement. Your life could be different in so many ways. But you were born a Bratva daughter. That’s who you are. Most women within the Bratva would want to marry a man like me.”
I scoff. “Arrogant much?”
His hand stills on my thigh. “It’s not arrogance. It’s just fact. I have money. I have power. Status. I’ve been told I’m handsome. What woman wouldn’t want that?”
“You also have a reputation for doing bad things to people. I don’t think any woman would want to be married to a man who eats babies.”
His laugh is much more light this time. “Who told you that? I don’t eat babies.”
“You torture people, though. I’ve heard the stories from my father. From other Bratva woman.”
“They were right about that. I do torture people, and I like it. Does that frighten you?”
“Of course it does. Are you going to torture me?”
He pats my thigh before removing his hand. I breathe a sigh of relief.
“If you’re asking me if I’m going to beat you senseless, then no. I have no desire to do that. I only torture people who piss me off.”
“What if I … upset you? Will you hurt me then?” I need to know so I can prepare myself. Erik is too much of an unknown variable.
“I’d probably give you a spanking to get you in line.”
All the air leaves my body.
Erik chuckles again. “There. You finally look truly scared. You never answered my question from before. Why did you not run from me down the aisle? Why did you attend our wedding?”
I duck my chin and stare down at my lap. My thigh burns from where he touched me. “I tried to run away, but my father caught me and forced me down the aisle. You think I’m brave, but I was just trying to do the right thing.”
“Which is?”
Protect my sister at all costs.
“He would’ve made my life worse if I hadn’t married you,” I say instead. “So, I walked down the aisle because it was my duty, like I said.” I lift my head back up and look him straight in the eye. “I’m prepared to do my duty.”
“Mmm.” His eyes roam over my face. When he brings his hand toward my cheek, I flinch, expecting him to hit me. But he doesn’t. “Interesting,” he says, skimming the backs of his fingers over my cheek. “You flinched.”
He drops his hand.
“I don’t know what you’re going to do,” I admit.
“Why would you? We’re strangers, after all.” He straightens his jacket. “You know, Anya, you still never answered my other question. Why do you find me disgusting?”
“Why do you care?”
“Why won’t you just answer the question?”
“Because I don’t like being told what to do,” I snap back. God. I can’t help but run my mouth off. It’s gotten me into a lot of trouble with my father. I should know better, yet I can’t help myself. Everything inside of me rages against being married to Erik, and a part of me needs to let him know.
He leans back against the window and stares at me for a long, hard moment. “Just answer me this. Do you find me ugly?”
My lips part, and no sound comes out.
“It’s a simple question, Anya. Do you find me ugly? Yes or no?”
“On the inside or outside?”
His own lips quirk into a subtle smile. “On the outside.”
“Yes,” I finally say. “I don’t find you handsome.”
“Interesting. Why not?”
Well, because it’s all a lie. I do find Erik handsome, but I don’t want him to know that. If he were to know that, it would feel like giving a piece of myself over to him that I’m not ready to give.
“You’re not offended?” I ask.
He shrugs. “Why would I be? I’m not an insecure man. You don’t find me attractive. It is what it is. As I said before, I didn’t marry you for your beauty. I married you for your connection to your father. There doesn’t have to be any lust between us … or any love for that matter. This is a marriage of politics. But I am curious what you don’t like about my face. Enlighten me.”
“Uh … your nose,” I say lamely. “I don’t like it.”
He smiles in a way that tells me he thinks I’m lying. That’s because I am.
“Do you find me ugly?” I ask, unsure why I even ask it at all.
He leans in closer to me, and I get a whiff of his scent—pure masculinity. I have the urge smell his shirt, which is ridiculous.
“I find you to be one of the most beautiful women I’ve ever laid eyes on.”
I blink, and slowly, a blush forms on my face. I hope and pray he can’t see it.
The car comes to a stop.
“Ah, we’re here,” Erik announces, opening the door before holding his hand out to me. “Shall we?”
I don’t want to party with Erik all evening long just to go to bed with him later.
But I’m in this marriage now, and I need to learn to accept it. The sooner I can, the sooner I can work toward making sure Nadia is safe.
And for some strange reason, I have the urge to take Erik’s hand.
So, I take it and let him pull me out of the car.