Chapter 33 Like I Do
Like I Do
? Till We Both Say - Nicotine Dolls
Jaxon
It’s been two weeks since I got the text, and Copper’s finally doing better. There’s still a very minute chance of a relapse, but Angie’s keeping a close eye on him, and I don’t feel the need to sleep in the barn anymore. I still check on him daily, but I get to spend my nights with my girl.
Rain pelts against my office window as I turn another page in my book, the same epic fantasy I was reading the night Callie and I met. I still remember every detail, down to the slight hitch in her voice when she finally introduced herself.
A loud clap of thunder reverberates through the house, settling deep in my bones. The sound wrenches me from my book and transports me into the past. I’m trapped in a memory, as vivid as the day it happened.
Another rumble shakes me to my core, and the lifeless form on the ground looks back at me with chilling awareness. But it’s not Ryan’s piercing gaze this time—it’s Callie. Her blue-green eyes stare back at me accusingly.
I choke on a sob. “I’m sorry. I’m so fucking sorry.”
Hands touch my rain-soaked skin, and a palm flattens against my cheek. “Look at me.”
It’s warm and familiar. I try to follow it, but the source eludes me.
Thundering hooves fade into the distance as I cradle Callie’s cold body in my arms. A strangled sound rumbles through me. I hear myself calling out for her, my voice rough and hoarse.
Her lifeless form evaporates to dust, and my hands shake as terror holds me in its vice-like grip. I plead with some unknown force to free me from my mind’s torment.
Soft lips touch my forehead. “Jax. Baby, I’m here. Come back to me.”
Callie?
I pinch my eyes shut, shaking myself out of the vision. Callie’s distraught face comes into focus beneath me. She’s on her knees at my feet with tears streaming down her face.
“Hey,” I murmur, cradling her jaw. “Don’t cry. I’m ok.”
She buries her face in my lap.
“Callie. My beautiful, strong Callie. Don’t cry for me.”
“You scared the shit out of me,” she chokes out the words between heaving breaths. “You were calling my name, but I couldn’t bring you out of it.”
I lift her into my arms and pull her against me, taking comfort in her presence. She holds my head against her chest, stroking her fingers through my hair. Her touch grounds me, and the horrifying images fade from my memory.
“What happened?” she whispers. “Was it Ryan again?”
“No. Not this time.”
“Me?”
I nod against her. “I thought I lost you.”
She tilts my head and presses her lips to mine. “I’m right here. I’m not going anywhere.”
Her fingers trace the lines of the broken watch tattooed on my forearm. “I get it now. You were trying to cover up old wounds with new ink, hoping to chase away the pain. But I see them. I see all of your scars just as you’ve seen mine, and they are beautiful.”
I swallow against an intense burning in my lungs. Each shallow breath is a struggle. “He would’ve loved you.”
Like I do.
The thought is immediate and wholly without pretext.
I do love her. I love her more than I thought I could love another person.
She’s become the axis my world spins on—the very gravity keeping me tethered to this earth.
Without her, I’m nothing. Maybe it’s dramatic, but everything about the way I love Callie Cooper is.
Heat stirs low in my gut. A longing to take her to bed—to make love to her until the sky burns with the vibrant colors of dawn and her eyes grow heavy from exhaustion.
Dimly aware that I am burning through the last shreds of self-restraint, I lift her into my arms and carry her to my bedroom.
She giggles as I toss her onto the mattress. “What are you doing?”
“Surrendering.”
Callie
Propped on my elbows, I watch on bated breath as he crawls over me with predatory grace. He settles heavily between my spread thighs, and his hardness presses against me. I respond with an indrawn breath.
“You’ve fucking ruined me, Callie.” His hand slides up the outside of my thigh, his gold rings scraping against my exposed flesh until his fingertips trace the outline of my sleep shorts. “I haven't felt this way… maybe ever. It’s maddening, this desperate, reckless hope you’ve given me.”
I’m hyper aware of every subtle shift, every movement, every breath.
Why does he feel like destiny? Like the lifetime of suffering led me here, to this moment with this man. Every heartbeat draws me closer to him. The desperation. The recklessness. I feel it all, too. In every atom of my existence.
“Make love to me, Jax.”
His eyes flare, and he takes my mouth in a hungry kiss. My lips part on a sigh. He slips his tongue inside with practiced ease. All coherent thought has fled as he devours me with gentle bites and teasing licks.
My hands pull at his shirt, desperately seeking more connection. He sits back on his haunches and tugs his shirt off over his head. I lie there, breathless, marveling at the perfection on display for my enjoyment. This man is a work of art, all muscle, sinew, and ink.
He gives me a crooked smile. “You keep looking at me like that, and we’ll never make it out of this bed.”
“You say that like it’s a bad thing.”
He pulls off my shorts and tosses them alongside his shirt, and then he’s right there, licking a path up my aching core. I arch off the bed in response to the sudden movement, my hand gripping his wild curls. He chuckles against my center, sending a riot of shivers coursing through me.
“Relax. We’re just getting started, baby.”
His mouth closes around my clit, teasing and sucking at the sensitive flesh.
His hand winds around my thigh, and his fingers dig into my softness as he pulls me tighter against him, his forehead resting against my belly.
He wields his tongue with expert precision, driving me to the brink of ecstasy like it’s his sole purpose in life.
A gasp escapes my parted lips as he slips two fingers inside me. I tug harder on his hair, needing something, anything, to ground me. I’m flying, soaring higher than ever before, higher than I ever will again. The sheer sensuality of this man will be my undoing.
“Jax. Baby. It’s too much.”
I feel him smile against me, and he lets out a sound like a feral growl. “Say it again, Bluebird.”
“Jax.”
“No. Not that.”
“Baby…”
“Fuck, I love the sound of that.” He threads his fingers through mine, lending me his strength like he so often does. “Let go. You can take it.”
He redoubles his efforts, devouring me while his deft fingers work me over. The lewd sounds of my arousal fill the silence.
My eyes drift shut against the overwhelming sensations until flying feels an awful lot like falling. Too soon, or perhaps not soon enough, my body convulses as the orgasm consumes me and steals the very breath from my lungs. The blinding pleasure drowns my senses until all I can do is feel.
He crawls up my body, murmuring quiet words of praise, his hands gripping the hem of my tank top. “Up.”
I lift off the bed enough to release my shirt until I'm fully naked beneath him. His hard length rests against my belly.
“Your turn, Cowboy.”
Without a moment’s hesitation, he kicks off his sweatpants. “Better?”
I give a hum of approval as I reach between us and take him in hand, stroking languidly.
“Fuuuck,” he groans. “I need to be inside you.”
“Yes. Please.”
He nods once. “Reach into the nightstand.”
“I’m on birth control, and I’ve been tested. Could we... maybe…”
“You want me to take you bare?”
“I want to feel you. All of you.”
He flips our positions until he’s propped against the headboard and I’m straddling his lap. “If you want it, take it. Make me yours, baby.”
A wave of possessiveness washes over me, and I'm overcome with the desire to claim him for myself. I fist his cock and line him up at my entrance, prepared to do exactly that.
“Eyes on me. I want to watch you count every fucking inch.”
I sink down slowly, stretching to accommodate his impressive size. Jax is patient, letting me adjust to the new position.
“One.”
“That’s my girl. You’re taking me so well, but I know you can take more.”
I drop lower, sliding my knees farther apart, aware of nothing but the intense pleasure of him filling me. “Two. Three. Four.”
He palms my ass, holding me steady. “I need a minute. You feel too fucking good.”
I roll my hips, deliberately teasing him as I take another inch. “Five.”
He groans.
“Come on, baby. You can take it,” I murmur, echoing his words back at him.
His hands slide delicately up my sides to cup my breasts. He rolls my nipples to stiff peaks, eliciting a soft moan. “God, I love the noises you make.”
“Six.” I sink down farther.
“Seven.” I whimper.
“Eight.”
My ass touches his thighs as I seat myself completely. I feel impossibly full and irrevocably changed.
He cups my cheek in his palm and pulls me down for a languid kiss. “I always knew you were made for me. Nothing and no one has ever felt like this. I was meant to find you, Callie baby, and I intend to keep you.”
I wrap my arms around his shoulders, cradling his head against my chest as I lift my hips and drop back down. We’re as close as two people can get, and it still doesn’t feel like enough.
His mouth closes around my nipple. I throw my head back and moan. His hands are everywhere, caressing and kneading every part of me within reach. His touch is gentle and reverent, like he’s trying to memorize every inch of my body.
I grind against his lap, taking him deeper than I ever thought possible. This position is new for us, and it’s easily becoming my favorite. The control, the angle, and the look in his eyes as I bring us both to the edge—nothing could ever compare to this.
He peppers my neck and collarbone with soft kisses. “You’re so goddamn stunning. I wish you could see yourself like this.”
I stop moving and nibble on my bottom lip. “What if I could?”
His eyes darken. “You don’t mean…”
I reach across to the nightstand and grab his phone. “Yes.”
His throat bobs almost imperceptibly. “You sure?”
“You once said you wanted me to see myself through your eyes.” I press the phone against his chest. “So, show me.”
“Last chance. As soon as I press this button, there’s no turning back. Callie Cooper riding my dick is going straight into my spank bank.”
I roll my hips to tease him. “Do it.”
He holds up the camera and starts the recording. A switch flips, and I become a completely different person—confident and playful. Maybe this was always a part of me, but it’s been locked away for so long I forgot she existed.
“Tell me what you want, Cowboy.”
“Fuuuuuck,” he rasps, his fingers digging into my upper thigh. “You know what I like. Ride me, Callie baby.”
I lift onto my knees and drop back down slowly, testing his patience. His free hand glides up my side and sends a shiver coursing through me.
I repeat the motion, clenching around his dick. We moan together as I rock back and forth, reveling in the delicious fullness. His palm engulfs my right breast, rolling my nipple.
“Does that feel good, baby?”
“God, yes. Your cock is hitting me so deep.” My voice comes out a little dreamy as my breathing picks up.
“I love when you talk dirty to me.” His palm connects with my ass, no doubt leaving a handprint. I like the thought of his marks on me. “Mmm. Your pussy liked that, dirty girl.”
I lean back, bracing my hands on his shins.
“Christ. I’ll never get enough of this view.” His palm skates from my neck, between my breasts, until he’s kneading the soft flesh of my belly. “I fucking love every part of you, but this softness is my favorite.”
He drags his hand lower until his fingers reach my clit, then he spreads me open. The camera follows his movements. “You look so good stretched and filled.”
I sit up straighter, gripping his shoulders to keep myself steady.
“Jax.” I whimper his name. “I’m so close.”
He digs his heels into the mattress and fucks up into me, meeting me thrust for thrust. “I’m gonna come.”
It’s a warning—an unspoken choice he’s giving me.
“Come inside me.”
“Fuck. You can’t say shit like that.”
“Do it, Jax. Fill me up. I need it.” It’s a desperate plea, and if I know anything about this man, he won't leave me wanting.
He joins our hands and slips them between us, forcing me to touch myself. “I won’t come without you.”
The added pressure is just what I need to send me careening over the precipice. My body convulses from a second soul-stealing orgasm. Jax continues fucking up into me, once, twice, then he stills, groaning out his release as he buries his face against my chest.
Sweat-soaked and panting, he tosses the phone onto the mattress and gently lays us on our sides as he softens inside of me. His fingertips trace lazy patterns on my belly. “I’m gonna put a baby in here someday.”
“You want that?”
“Watching you grow big and round with our child? A baby that’s half of you and half of me? Fuck yes.”
“I want that, too,” I whisper.
We exchange no further words, just a heady feeling that something has irrevocably changed between us. His eyes seem to hold the answers to a million questions I don’t dare ask.
His lips touch mine in a barely there kiss, and he nuzzles against my neck. I drift to sleep in his arms, feeling close to whole for the first time in my life.