7. Ben
7
Ben
I ’ve been excited ever since Trey texted me yesterday, and I don’t really know why. I am looking forward to the possibility of having someone to cook for, but he might not want to eat meals with me, or he might only eat kale, or he might never actually be here at all.
We might have completely different tastes in movies and music. He probably won’t want to watch movies in the living room with me anyway. But we might go hiking together. He said at the wedding that he liked hiking. That would be fun. I hope he likes dogs and doesn’t mind dog hair.
That thought sends me off into a burst of cleaning that lasts most of the morning, chasing the endless tumbleweeds of dog hair around the house with a vacuum. When I’m convinced that I captured them all, I put the vacuum away and make myself sit down and take a breath. I’m just helping out a friend of Mandy’s. There’s no reason to be so anxious slash excited about it. Trey seemed like a very nice guy at the wedding, and I’m sure everything will be fine. I don’t even know where the nerves come from. Hopefully, we can be friends. Having just moved, I don’t really have many friends in the area. It would be nice to have someone to do things with occasionally. That’s really what I miss most about being married. I’ve never been a super social person, and one or two people in my circle are all I need to be happy. My dogs aren’t quite enough, and I promised myself that once I got settled here, I would join some sort of club or group to meet people. I’ve even found some hiking clubs online, but I haven’t reached out yet. I have all kinds of excuses, but if I’m honest with myself, it comes down to nervousness. I take a deep breath and force myself to go into my office and focus on work for the rest of the afternoon.
When the doorbell rings at four o’clock, I’ve succeeded well enough that it startles me, which I congratulate myself for on the way to the door. When I swing it open, instead of “Hi, come on in!” which is what I meant to say, what comes out of my mouth is, “Hi on in!” Following that amazing mastery of the English language, I proceed to facepalm myself hard enough that there is an audible smack sound, and I involuntarily “eep” in discomfort.
Trey had a polite smile on his face when I first opened the door, but it’s quickly replaced by a look of concerned confusion, followed by his brilliant grin as I recover from hitting myself and stand there awkwardly. I’m pretty sure I’m also turning red. I have the sense to step back from the door and gesture him inside, and I’m temporarily saved from further embarrassment by the dogs, who have obviously been waiting behind me for him to step over the threshold so that they can protect the house by loving him to death. Daisy sits right in front of him so he can’t go any farther, then does excited bounce spins on her butt and whines, waiting for him to pet her. Della circles around both of them several times, then stands up on her back legs, asking for her share of attention. Thankfully, neither dog jumps on him. I’ve managed to train them that much, but it’s still a lot of dog all at once.
“I’m sorry, I swear I pay attention to them. It’s just that you’re new and exciting,” I apologize as I try to get the dogs to give him some space.
“It’s okay, they’re such good dogs, aren’t you? Yes, you are,” Trey says in that gooey voice that people reserve for babies and pets. He kneels down into the licking danger zone and gives both girls scratches, rubs, and pets. “Are they boys or girls?” he asks me.
“They’re both girls, sisters, in fact,” I tell him. “The lighter one is Daisy, and the darker one is Della.”
“Oh, yes, you’re pretty girls, aren’t you? Yes, you are. You’re so, so pretty.” Trey tells the dogs as he stands back up with a hand on each one.
“So I guess I don’t have to worry about you being okay with the dogs,” I say. That had been one of the many worries this morning.
“No, I like dogs. I’ve never had a pet, but I’ve always thought that I would be a dog person,” he answers.
“That’s awesome,” I say, gesturing toward the great room. “This is the kitchen, living room, and dining room. The pantry is right there next to the fridge. As long as you’re staying here, feel free to help yourself to any of the food or drinks. I make dinner almost every night, and I’ve never figured out how to cook for one person, so there’s always lots of food. You’re welcome to join me for dinner or eat leftovers, whatever works for you. Not that you’re not welcome to cook your own food - you are. I just meant it might be easier. The TV is fairly easy to work, even for me, so I’m sure it won’t be a problem for you. You’re welcome to make yourself a profile on the services, so you don’t have to watch the things I like.” I lead him down the short hallway as I talk. “These are my bedroom and my office. I work from home, Mandy probably told you, so I’m here most of the time. Can’t beat the view, though! The view from your room upstairs is even better.”
Trey is following me obediently, looking in doorways and making admiring noises. “This is a very nice house,” he says when I stop for breath. “So it’s not just a room?” he asks. “You’re offering the run of the house and food, too?”
I turn and look at him, halting my progress to the stairs. “Of course,” I tell him. “If you’re living here, you’re family.” I’m a little confused because his tone is a little apprehensive, and I’m not sure if I’ve done something to make him uncomfortable.
He doesn’t say anything else as we climb the stairs. “These rooms are for you,” I tell him. “We can move the furniture around however you want it, and if you need any other pieces, I can buy them. I want you to be comfortable for as long as you’re here.”
Trey is looking more and more uneasy, so I stop talking and just stand awkwardly in the middle of the bedroom, wondering what I did wrong.
“This is great. Your house is beautiful, but I don’t think I can afford it.” He finally says quietly. “I don’t have much saved, and I haven’t found a job for after my RA job ends next week. I’m going back to school in the fall, so any job I get for the summer will be pretty low-paying. My budget just isn’t going to stretch to two rooms and food. I’m sorry to waste your time.”
“Oh,” I say, relieved to be able to fix the problem so easily. “I wasn’t going to charge you anything. So it’s not a problem. No budget issues!”
From the look on his face, this isn’t as much of a relief as I was hoping. “Why not?” he asks. “I don’t understand. Why would you rent out rooms and not charge anything?”
“I wasn’t planning on renting them out, even though it’s way too much house for me.” I try to reassure him. “But Mandy said that you needed a place to stay, so I figured you could stay here. Does that not work for you?” I’m starting to get a twisting, anxious feeling in the pit of my stomach, like I’ve done something wrong, but I don’t know what. The words come pouring out of me as I try to find the right thing to say to wipe the uncomfortable look off of Trey’s face. “I never minded having Mandy’s friends here in high school. Not that you’re in high school.” A weak chuckle escapes me, but I barrel on. “I miss having people around, so I thought it would be fun to have someone to cook and hang out with for a little while. Not that you have to hang out with me, even though I like you. I’m not expecting anything.” I stop to breathe, and what just came out of my mouth plays back in my head. My eyes go wide with dawning horror and embarrassment. “Oh, God. I did not mean what that sounded like. I’m so sorry. Nevermind. I don’t know why I thought this was a good idea. I’ll just let you run away from the crazy man now.”
I end my smooth, perfectly normal rant with my face buried in my hands so I don’t have to look at Trey’s face, but when I don’t hear footsteps going back downstairs and instead hear deep chuckles, I peek through my fingers.
Trey is looking at me with a bright smile, and he reaches up to gently peel my hands from my face. “It’s fine. I know what you meant,” he reassures me. “If it’s okay with you, I’d like to stay here for the summer. If you truly don’t want any money for rent, I’ll help out with chores and cooking and taking care of these guys.” He pats the dogs, who are still gazing lovingly up at him. “You have a beautiful yard out there, and I’m sure there are lots of things to do to help take care of it. I’ve never had a yard, so you’ll have to teach me, but I’d love to learn and help.”
The rush of relief and pleasure I feel when my awkwardness doesn’t put off Trey, and he says he’ll stay, seems outsized for the situation, but I’m so happy that I don’t dwell on it. I give him a set of keys, and he lets me know he’ll be back tomorrow with his things. He shakes my hand at the door, and I ruthlessly crush the desire to just hold on. I’m not sure what’s going on with me, but I know I’m suddenly looking forward to summer a lot more.