Chapter 7
SEVEN
ALEX
I gripped the next chain-link fence panel and unfastened it from the post, moving it to the pile with all the others. We’d elected to get rid of the old kennels rather than attempting to convert them into something else. As they were still in good shape, we were dismantling them section by section. Callum had already found a buyer who wanted the lot of them. It wouldn’t be a huge sum, but every little bit helped offset the cost of lumber and other materials for the renovation we were planning.
It was methodical, repetitive work that did nothing to distract me from the frustration and anger that had been dogging me for days. I wished we were tearing out walls. I needed the physicality of swinging a sledgehammer to bleed off a little of the self-recrimination that had been on constant repeat in the back of my brain since Ciara had walked away from me.
As she’d predicted, I saw her often. A half-dozen times in the past week, at least. And as she’d requested, I kept my distance insofar as possible. But I didn’t miss the hitch in her step whenever she spotted me. That hitch belied her otherwise breezy, casual confidence. Because every single time I crossed her path, she was reminded of how I’d hurt her.
I’d been a fool to think that some half-arsed apology would do anything to give her real closure. But I didn’t know what more I could do, short of bailing on my mates and the business we were starting and leaving Glenlaig entirely. My guilt over how I’d let her down wasn’t enough to overcome the debt of friendship and gratitude I felt for Finn and Callum. Ewan, too.
Which meant we were at an impasse.
Was there any possible scenario where she forgave me? If there was, I hadn’t figured out what it might be. It wasn’t even about wanting her back. How could I want someone back, who I’d never really had in any substantive way to begin with? The twenty-four hours we’d spent together had felt like Fate, but possibility wasn’t reality.
Still, I missed her. Which was completely mental. She’d been a blink in the grand scheme of my life. And yet, our time together had fundamentally changed something in me. Maybe I was only just now realizing how much, when it was entirely too late.
I threw down the next panel with more force than necessary.
“Och, what did that fence ever do to you?” Finn asked.
“Sorry.” I was already turning back to the last remaining kennel. Once this was done, we’d be ripping up the artificial turf to make way for framing in some new walls. I wouldn’t actually get to break anything until we opened up the side wall for a rolling door to allow for moving large outdoor equipment in and out. That had to wait until a longer stretch of dry weather than we’d been having.
“What’s crawled up your arse? You’ve been scowling for days.”
“Nothing. Just twitchy is all.” It was something we’d all experienced since we left the military, and I expected him to leave it at that.
“You sure there’s nothing you want to talk about before Callum gets back from the bank?”
I didn’t even spare my friend a glance as I began removing the nut and bolt holding on one of the last post clamps. “Since when do we ever want to talk?”
Finn took up position to the side, ready to grab the panel when it released. “I noted you left the pub right after Ewan’s sister last weekend.”
My considerable training was the only thing that stopped my hands from jerking at this observation. I’d thought I’d been more subtle than that. “Did I?”
He was looking at me with far more speculation than was comfortable. I simply kept at my task, as if it were absorbing my full attention.
Finn opened his mouth to say something more, but before he could, I heard a noise.
“Shhh.”
“You cannae put me off that easily, mate.”
“No, no. Listen. Do you hear that?” I held perfectly still, angling my head to try to catch the sound I’d heard before. A faint rustle and sort of squeak. “There.”
Setting aside my tools, I took a few steps, then paused to listen again.
“It’s probably rats.”
“Well, if it is, we need to know so we can get rid of them. I think it’s coming from over here.”
I wandered over to a pile of wood pallets in the back of the building. We’d held off on doing anything with them in case the wood could be repurposed somehow. “Come help me so the mountain doesn’t collapse on whatever’s under here.”
Together, we carefully began shifting pallets off the stack. And halfway down found the source of the noise.
“What the hell is it?” Finn asked.
I crouched down, carefully extracting the wee orange creature from a pocket between the pallets. “A wee kitten. It can’t be more than a few weeks old. I guess she was stuck under there.”
The tiny body shivered in my hand, so I unzipped my fleece vest and tucked it against my chest. It butted its tiny head against my shirt and mewed at me.
Finn scratched at his stubbled cheek. “How the hell did it get in here?”
“I don’t know. Are there others?”
He poked around the remaining pallets, looking for any littermates, but the wee tabby beastie seemed to be the only one.
We were still debating where it had come from when Callum returned. “I thought you lot would be finished by now.”
“We found a stowaway.” I unzipped my vest to show the kitten.
A blonde woman in a worn puffer vest and mud-spattered Wellies followed him into the back room. Her gaze slid straight to me. “What have you got there?” Her voice was at odds with her appearance. Instead of the Scots I’d expected, her accent was straight from London. The kind of posh upper-class cadence that spoke of boarding school and money.
At the sound of it, I could practically feel Finn bristle.
“May I?” When I nodded, the newcomer reached out and gently lifted the kitten, who objected to the change in position by digging its little claws into my shirt. “Come here, little one. Let’s look you over.”
“You know something about cats, then?”
She glanced up with bright green eyes that glittered with amusement. “I should hope so, since I’m a vet. Saoirse MacGregor.”
“Dr. MacGregor is the one buying the old kennels,” Callum explained.
“I figure I can use them for boarding at my practice. Here now, little love.” Saoirse ran her fingers over the creature, checking its limbs, its teeth. The kitten mewled its protest at a surprising volume. Something about her reminded me of Ciara.
“She’s underweight, a little dehydrated, and most certainly in need of a bath. No doubt she’ll need her shots, but she seems pretty healthy otherwise. I’d say about four to five weeks old.”
I stuck out my finger, and the kitten batted it with a tiny paw.
“What are we supposed to do with her?” Finn asked. “She’s not ours.”
A flash of something that might have been disgust passed over Saoirse’s face. Before the situation could devolve, I found myself opening my mouth. “I’ll take her.”
I hadn’t intended to keep her. But maybe it would be good to have someone else to focus on that wasn’t me or the woman I’d accidentally scorned.
My mates stared at me in shock, but Saoirse smiled. “You can come by my office, and we’ll get the shots taken care of and see about getting her a bath and all the other things you’ll need. She’s underweight, so you might need to do a little bottle-feeding to supplement for a while. Since we don’t have a pet store in the village, we keep the basics on hand to get people through until they can order supplies or go pick them up somewhere else.”
“That sounds good.”
“Here you go, Da.” Saoirse passed the kitten back to me.
I held the wee beastie up to eye level. “You okay with being my new roommate?”
The kitten promptly batted my nose, but without claws.
“I’m taking that as an aye.”
I settled her into the inside pocket of my vest, where she curled up in a ball and promptly began to purr.
“Well now, let’s go find your new baby some water.”