Chapter Nate
Nate
The echo of a basketball bouncing is the only sound in the gym. I catch it on the rebound and take another shot from the free-throw line, landing it with a clean swish.
The janitor let me in early this morning after I said something about getting a head start on lesson plans.
Truth is, I ain’t worried about lesson plans. I just couldn’t sit still.
Not after yesterday.
My next shot clanks off the backboard, but it still drops in. I’m not too bad at basketball, but football was always my sport. But I got some pent-up energy after yesterday.
All I’ve been able to think about is kissing her in her classroom, her shirt off, letting me—
The double doors to the gym creak open, and I shove the memory down before I got a public problem.
Layla strolls in like she owns the place, carrying a travel mug the size of her head in both hands. “Coach Wesley, what the hell are you doing playing basketball at seven in the morning?”
“Just working off some energy.”
She stalks toward me. “What kind of energy has you coming to work this early?”
I catch the ball as it bounces back. “The good kind.”
“Alright, spill. What happened?”
I spin the ball in my hand, building up suspense for only a moment before I blurt it out. “We’re back together.”
She freezes mid-sip from her massive cup. “You and Iris?”
“Yeah. We talked for a long time after school yesterday. We made up, some stuff happened.” I wonder if Iris would maybe want to do that again later. Or, the idea springs to life, surging a wave of want through me, maybe she’ll want to do more.
I just gotta remember to be respectful, not ask stupid shit.
“No way,” Layla challenges.
“Yes way.”
“Like, for real-for real?”
“For real. I think we’re in a good spot, Layla. All that stuff we had going on, we got it sorted out.”
Layla exhales, a smile lighting up her face. “That’s the best damn news I’ve heard in a long time. I hated seeing her sad.”
I scoff in offense, “You hated seeing her sad? What about me? We were friends first.”
She shrugs, “It was your fault to begin with, so I didn’t feel bad for you. Iris is the best. You don’t deserve her.”
I feel like I should be offended by that, but hell if she ain’t right. Iris is the best woman I’ve ever met, and the fact that she’s giving me another chance after I messed up that bad—
“I’m real lucky, that’s for sure.”
“Damn right you are.” She takes a long sip from her coffee, then lowers it with a sly grin. “Speaking of lucky… guess who I heard got fired yesterday. Right in the middle of cheer practice.”
I raise a brow. “Huh.”
I almost forgot.
“You know anything about that?”
“Maybe.”
“Nate!” she gasps, smacking my arm.
“What?” I laugh. “She threatened Iris. Said some fucked up shit about her and Alex. I wasn’t gonna let her get away with that. You know how Holloway feels about bullying. He was pissed.”
“Remind me never to get on your bad side.”
“All I want is for Iris to be safe.” The words settle heavily around us, Layla nodding in agreement.
Until I interrupt the moment by saying, “I can’t wait to see her today. I hope she’s wearing one of those shirts that—”
Layla groans, “You’re gonna be useless today, aren’t you?”
I don’t respond, my mind already drifting. Iris wearing a hippie skirt, me taking the hippie skirt off…
“Alright, fine,” Layla says, loud enough that I remember she’s here. “Come on, my turn.”
I bounce the ball toward her. She sets her coffee on the floor and lines up like she knows what she’s doing. It bounces off the rim so hard it flies over to the bleachers.
I double over, laughing. “Oh, man! That was tragic.”
We spend the next several minutes catching up. I begrudgingly ask about Grant even though I hate that guy, and I tell her all about how Christmas went with Iris before everything happened.
Layla’s giggling about Sammy calling Iris Auntie, when one of the juniors from the team strides into the gym. “Hey, Coop, you need something?”
He stops in front of Layla and me, looking between us both before settling on me with an uncomfortable expression. I almost ask him what’s wrong before he says something that sends us into shock. “Uh, Coach? Is it true that your girlfriend’s a dude?”
I don’t remember what I said to Cooper.
All I know is next thing, I’m tearing out of the gym doors with Layla right behind me.
Heads turn as we run past, hundreds of faces directed at us, and every single one of ‘em knows.
Something that wasn’t theirs to know.
My heart pounds as I run harder than I ever have playing football. All I can think is, please, God, don’t let Iris hear this from somebody else.
Layla stops, scanning the hall, her face gone pale. “Nate!”
Iris stands frozen at the entrance to the school, near the big trophy case, looking beautiful as ever, but she’s not moving.
People are watching her, too.
This is her nightmare come true. Exposed, surrounded by everyone looking at her like she’s some kind of—
“Iris!” I shout as we push through the crowded hallway.
Layla reaches her first, a gentle hand brushing Iris’s arm. “Honey, it’s okay…” But Iris jerks out of her hold.
“They all know,” she gasps. “Everyone…” I try to reach for her, but she takes a stumbling step back, hand over her mouth, shaking her head. “No. Don’t touch me, I can’t.”
She turns and runs toward the exit.
We’re right behind her, past the office and out the double doors into the winter air. Iris barely makes it before she doubles over a metal trash can, her body wracked with sobs.
She’s gagging, shaking so bad I can see it, with mascara tears streaking her face. Her breath coming in ragged, panicked gasps. I stop beside her, pulling her hair back. “Hey, you’re okay, I’m here, Layla’s here, we got you.”
She slumps forward. “They know,” she gasps, her voice broken.
“I know,” I whisper, putting my hand on her back, trying to soothe her. Slowly, like it takes everything out of her, she leans sideways and wraps her arms around me, my own coming around her instantly. She presses her wet face against my white t-shirt, getting mascara on it, but hell if I care.
“I’ve got you, Darlin’. I’m not going anywhere.”
Layla is standing behind Iris, wiping tears from her own eyes, but I don’t even bother doing that.
Because this is my fucking fault.
The cafeteria is louder than usual, with everybody talking about us.
I’ve been trying to focus on getting through the day. There ain’t no way Holloway would let me leave. He’s not exactly known for caring about personal problems. But I can’t stop thinking about her. How fuckin’ happy she was yesterday.
Seeing her hurt like that, my heart can’t take it.
When I walk past a couple of tables, all conversation stops. I grab a soda from the vending machine and try to ignore it.
“Wesley,” Coach Tanner calls out from a corner table. I head toward him. He’s a buddy, and I could use a friendly face right about now.
“Didn’t expect to see you today. Thought maybe you’d be takin’ a day off, after all the excitement.” I tense, slowly stopping in front of him, tray balanced in my hand.
“What excitement?”
He snorts, pushing his sandwich aside. “You know what I mean. Didn’t realize you were into, uh…” He hesitates, then adds, scrunching his nose in disgust. “People like that.”
I don’t say anything, frozen for a solid minute. Mostly out of shock that somebody who’s been my buddy for years would talk about the woman I love like that. I expect that shit from the kids, they don’t know any better.
But the teachers, too?
“Tanner,” I say, and his name comes out like a threat. “You wanna repeat that?”
He shrugs, like he doesn’t know what the big deal is. “Hey, not judgin’. You can’t fault me for bein’ surprised. I mean, she used to be… Just didn’t know you were one of them is all.”
There’s a tightness in my chest that I’ve never felt before, as heat rises to my face. I glance around to see a few teachers looking down at their lunches, pretending they’re not listening.
“That’s enough, Tanner. If all you’ve got to offer is bullshit, maybe you oughta keep your damn mouth shut.” A couple of students gasp at my language, but I’m past caring.
He raises his hands in mock surrender. “Relax, man. Just sayin’ what everyone else is thinkin’.”
“Well, I don’t give a damn what people think.”
He leans back in his chair, smirking. “Even if it costs you your team?”
Heading out the side door toward the parking lot, deep in thought, I damn near bump into Iris’s favorite student, Addie. “Oh, sorry, kid, didn’t see you there.”
“Hey, Coach,” she says, shifting her sketchbook under her arm. “Um, Ms. Patel wasn’t in class today, and I heard some stuff. Is she okay?”
The question catches me off guard after hearing nothing but insults all day. Feels good to know that everybody isn’t like that.
“Thanks for checking in. I know it’d mean a lot to Iris. I’m going to see her right now, so I’ll let you know.”
Addie nods, relieved. “Good. Give her a hug for me. And tell her we’re thinking about her.”
I force a small smile. “I will.”
It took me ten minutes to get out of the truck, and I’ve been standing at her door like an idiot for at least five, my heart pounding like I just ran the mile.
My phone buzzes in my pocket for gotta be the hundredth time today, and when I pull it out and see my dad’s name on the screen, I hit the red button.
I ain’t touching that right now.
‘Cause honestly, today’s been hell. Everywhere I go, people are talking about me or Iris. Making damn sure it’s loud enough that I hear. Calling me things I’ve never been called before.
Calling her worse.
I didn’t know it would feel like this.
I mean, I knew some folks would have opinions. My family might have questions. But I didn’t realize the rest of the town would care.
And I didn’t know it would crawl under my skin like this, make me feel like there’s something wrong with me. Truth is, I never thought anybody would have to know. That we could go on like before.
Maybe that was a mistake.