Chapter 31
Nate
I wake up warm all over, feeling rested for the first time since everything happened with Alex.
But when I reach for Iris to hold her, my arm finds nothing but cool sheets, empty where she should be. I blink against the morning light shining through the curtain, my heart already picking up.
“Iris?” I call out.
No answer.
I push up on my elbows to scan the empty room, and when I don’t see her, I swing my legs over the side of the bed. Thankfully, the bathroom door is open a crack, enough for me to see her standing at the sink.
Of course, she’s here.
She ain’t having second thoughts about taking me back.
The relief quickly turns when I open the door fully and find her staring into the mirror, naked from head to toe and completely still. She flinches a little when I line myself up against her back, but she doesn’t pull away, so that’s something.
I push her hair to the side and kiss the curve of her neck. “Whatcha doing?”
She doesn’t answer. Doesn’t even look at me. And I can see the tears threatening to spill over. “Hey. What is it, Darlin’?”
“Do you regret it?” She speaks up, her voice filled with a sadness I don’t understand. I thought we were good.
“Why the hell would you think that?” She looks down, and she doesn’t say anything, but it hits me. I know exactly what this is about. What my own thoughtless words have put into her head.
So I do something that Iris might be pissed at me for, but I can’t let her go on thinking I could ever regret her. I should’ve made it clear last night before we ever did anything.
My hand slides down slowly, giving her every chance to stop me. “N–Nate, what are you—”
I don’t squeeze or stroke, I ain’t trying to get her going right now. I just hold her soft skin in my hand. In the mirror, her eyes widen as she watches my hand grasp her where she thinks she’s undesirable.
“I don’t regret a damn thing. I love all of you, Iris. I love this too.” I give her a little squeeze, earning a whimper that would be going straight to my dick if I wasn’t so damn sorry that I ever hurt her.
That must have been the right thing to say because she turns around and wraps her arms around me. I pull her in tight, sliding a hand up her back, my palm resting against the nape of her neck. Her voice cracks when she finally whispers, “I’m sorry.”
“What for?”
“I’m not trying to be emotional,” she says, the words tumbling out through her tears. “I was so happy last night. I am happy. I know you love me. But sometimes it hits so bad I can’t breathe. And I hate that I can’t ever be what you really want.”
My heart aches, thinking about her feeling like that. I run my hand through her messy hair. “You’re exactly what I want, Darlin’.”
She sniffles against me, her body trembling in my arms. “I don’t want to be too much, you already have so much on your plate and—”
I shake my head, pulling back, holding her by her arms, forcing her to look at me. “Hey, I don’t wanna hear any of that crazy talk. I don’t want you thinking you can’t tell me if you’re sad. Making you feel better is sorta in the boyfriend job description.”
“God, you’re such a sap,” she sniffles, but there’s a little smile tugging at her lips now.
“Yeah, well,” I brush my thumb over her damp cheek, catching the tears. “You love me for it.”
“Oh, do I?”
“Mhm, told me last night, can’t even try to deny it anymore.” The tight feeling in my chest eases as she melts against me, replaced by something warm.
We actually fixed things.
I can hardly believe it.
Out of the corner of my eye, I catch her reflection again, her naked body pressed against mine. And now that she ain’t so upset, I can’t help but notice that her ass looks real good in the morning light.
I let out a low whistle.
She snorts, shoving lightly at my chest. “Stop.”
I grin, dipping my head to kiss her neck again, but she slips out of my hold. “Mm,” I grumble, reaching for her again. “Where do you think you’re going?”
“I have to get ready.”
“No, you don’t.”
“Nate,” she complains, trying to wriggle free when I pull her back into my hold. “I do. I should have already left by now and—”
“I’ll be quick. C’mon, let me touch you again.”
“I don’t have time.”
I set her free and watch her bend over to start the shower.
Jesus.
I am one lucky man.
“You sure? I could help you out in the shower. Start your day off real good.”
“Nate,” she stands up, trying to look stern, but all she’s doing is making me want her more, frowning like that. “If I let you in the shower, I’m going to be late.”
“Fine,” I sigh, backing out of the bathroom, knowing I ain’t winning this one. “But you’re missing out!”
My heart feels heavy walking through the front door without Iris. After last night, being away from her so soon feels wrong. I should be making her breakfast, kissing her while she’s still half-asleep, but she has to work, and I need to be home with Alex.
I expected everybody to still be sleeping, but Alex is on the couch, one arm propped up on a pillow, the other holding a controller. Noah is beside him, focused on the game, while Sammy’s perched on the other side, drawing on his cast with a marker. “Ha! Eat my dust, Noah!”
“Not today!”
Alex frowns at the screen when Noah knocks him off the track, taking the win at the last second. “What the hell, dude! That’s cheating!”
Noah looks up at me with the biggest smile. “Uncle Nate! You missed me kicking Alex’s butt!”
“Don’t worry, kid, I saw.”
Alex groans, flopping against the couch cushions. “I can’t believe this. I’m all fucked up, and you’re bullying me.”
“Look, Alex! Pretty!”
“Not bad, kid. Giving Iris a run for her money,” Alex says, inspecting the new flower design on his cast. Sammy lights up at the compliment. She hasn’t stopped talking about Iris since Christmas.
I relax against the couch, my mind still stuck on her. A few days ago, it didn’t feel like it was ever going to be okay again, but I think we might be getting there.
Coffee’s still warm, so I pour myself a cup, and I don’t even notice Alex limping in until he speaks. “You hiding in here?”
“Getting my coffee in before Noah ropes me into Mario Kart.”
He snorts, leaning against the island to take pressure off his injuries. “Good luck. Little dude’s ruthless.”
“So, uh,” I start, not being able to keep my mouth shut about it any longer. “Me and Iris. We worked things out last night. We’re back together.”
“Yeah, I figured,” he says with a grin. “Judging by the stupid look on your face. And the fact that you didn’t come home last night.”
I smirk, cause I can’t help myself. “I was a little busy.”
Alex groans, covering his ears with his good hand and his cast. “Nope. Shut up. I do not need details about whatever gross shit you got up to.”
“Relax. I wasn’t gonna give you the play-by-play. Just… you know. Things are good.”
“TMI, dude. Seriously,” he says with a sound that lets me know he’s disgusted, and I laugh, a real one that shakes out of me easily. Alex smiles too, wide and dimpled, the kind I used to see on him all the time before everything went to hell.
It’s good to see again.
And then my phone ruins it by buzzing in my pocket.
My stomach sinks when I see who it is. I hit decline and set it facedown on the counter.
“Who was that?”
I sigh, rubbing the back of my neck. This is the last thing I want to talk about right now. “Police station. They’ve been calling me, wanting a statement from you. I’ve been holding them off, but they’re not gonna wait forever.”
Alex stands up straight, attempting to cross his arms. “I’m not doing that.”
“Alex—”
“No!” He slams his hand against the counter, the sound cracking through the kitchen. “I’m not sitting in some stupid room and telling a bunch of strangers what he did to me.”
“I know it’s hard, but—”
“You don’t know,” Alex snaps, eyes wild, but I know he’s not pissed at me. “You didn’t live it. You didn’t have to—”
“You’re right. I didn’t. But I saw what he did to you, and I want him to pay for it, Alex.”
He shakes his head. “I can’t.”
I put a hand on his shoulder, trying to comfort him. “Hey, I’m not gonna make you. But they’re gonna need something soon. If not, he might walk.”
All of a sudden, Alex isn’t an angry teenager anymore. He’s that scared kid, lying in a hospital bed. “What… what do you mean he might walk?”
“Jason’s claiming you wanted it. That you—” My voice falters. How am I supposed to continue that sentence? Tell Alex what Jason’s been saying about him?
If I ever get my hands on him again…
He looks down at the floor, getting what I’m saying with a sigh of defeat. “Fine. I’ll do it.”
Relief floods through me, followed by guilt for making him do something he clearly doesn’t want. “Okay. We’ll go after—”
“No,” he cuts me off. “Not we. You’re not coming.”
“What?”
“I don’t want you there,” he says too fast, tripping over the words. “I don’t want you hearing it. Any of it. It’s…” His cheeks turn pink as he looks anywhere but at me. “It’s humiliating, Nate. And you’ll lose your shit.”
“Alex—”
“Will you ask Iris to come with me?”
“Iris?” I question, but he only shrugs, still not looking up.
It kills me that he doesn’t want me to be there for him, but if that’s what he wants… “Alright. I’ll talk to her.”
He finally glances up at me, but any openness from before is long gone. “Thanks.”
“You got it, kid. We’re not letting that son of a bitch get away with this.”
Coming out of Holloway’s office, I spot Iris and Layla across the hall. “Hey, wait up,” I call, catching up with them.
Iris’s face lights up when she sees me before she settles back into something more neutral. “Oh. Nate. Hi.”
I squint at her weird tone while Layla smirks. “Well, if it isn’t Coach Wesley.”
I take Iris’s hand and walk with them into the teacher’s lounge. “I just finished meeting with Holloway, and it’s gonna be another week before I come back. Gotta make sure Alex is feeling good enough to stay home by himself.”