Best Christmas Ever

17. Roxie

By the time I walked up the street towards Fingal Café, I was ready for an afternoon with Henry. I was still feeling emotional, so I just hoped Henry didn’t touch on any subjects that tipped me into a blubbering idiot. Despite the emotional turmoil, I felt free. It was like a concrete blanket of guilt had been lifted from my body.

It was a strange feeling but a fabulous one.

Henry was already waiting for me. He was wearing the same hat he’d worn when I’d first seen him, and my heart skipped a beat at how handsome he was. He closed the distance between us with four long strides and placed his hand on my hip as he leaned in to kiss me. Our lips met in a now familiar kiss that made my heart flutter.

“So what’s this surprise you have for me?” he asked.

I grinned. “I don’t know if it’s really a surprise. It’s just one of my favorite places to visit.” I didn’t mention that I mainly went there when life was getting me down. It suddenly occurred to me that my destination might not have been such a good choice given the morning I’d had. But it was too late now.

We cruised along Fingal Road and over the bridge that took us back to the bustling holiday mecca of the Gold Coast. The change in scenery from our beachside haven to Surfers Paradise was dramatic. And my energy levels matched the transition.

As I guided him toward Nerang Forest, our conversation flowed beautifully. I found it fascinating that a man I barely knew could choose topics that captured my interest. It was almost like he’d been a neighbor or something and knew everything about me.

When we reached our destination, Henry pulled the car into the driveway and turned to me, grinning. “A butterfly house?”

“Yes. Have you ever been to one?”

He did the slightest of frowns. “No, I haven’t.”

“Well, I hope you like it as much as I do.”

We stepped from the car and walked hand in hand toward the entrance. I stepped up to the tiny wooden hut and smiled at the middle-aged woman behind the counter. “Hi, Mavis.”

“Roxanne, how lovely to see you again.”

“You too. I’d like you to meet Henry.”

Henry offered his hand, and when Mavis reached forward to clasp it, a delightful smile lit up her face. Henry had that effect on people.

“It’s lovely to meet you.”

I pushed a twenty-dollar bill across the counter. “Oh, you don’t have to pay, dear. You know that.”

“I know, but I want to.” It was a ritual I went through with Mavis every time. I had no idea if she was as generous with every patron, but it was a wonder she could afford to keep the butterfly house going.

Mavis nodded at Henry. “Let me know if you have any questions.”

“I will. Thank you.”

I led Henry through the gate and down a flower-lined path. “You come here often, huh?”

“Not often enough.”

A low moan tumbled from his throat, and I wondered what he was thinking.

I stepped up to the mesh gate and opened it so we entered a small, cubed room and we stepped through a second gate into a much larger room. It was so big and so filled with flora it was impossible to see the other side. Sometimes I’d forget I was even in a room.

Holding Henry’s hand, I led him into the lush garden along a cobblestone path. “Mavis and her husband laid every one of these stones.”

“It’s wonderful.”

We passed a small pond that was fed by a trickling stream; water lilies with vibrant pink flowers floated atop the water.

“Mavis and Randall started this over thirty years ago. They planted every plant and built every structure.”

“A labor of love by the looks.”

“Yeah.” It was a little slice of paradise.

I led him to a bench seat beneath the shade of a giant Jacaranda tree covered in purple flowers. Beside our seat was a plush Poinsettia plant covered in red flowers that were often associated with Christmas.

“Mavis has told me that the only way to attract butterflies is to grow flowers. I think you’ll agree she’s succeeded.” I waved my hand toward the panorama around us and watched Henry’s face transform from delight to absolute awe.

The sun’s rays permeated the foliage in long spears of light, giving the area a surreal, heavenly aura. Matching that aura was how peaceful it was. Barely a sound could be heard, and on the Gold Coast, that was practically impossible.

Adding to the delightful scene was the abundance of flowering plants and, of course, the butterflies. The colorful insects fluttered about the foliage in a beautiful natural display.

I inhaled long and deep and settled back on the chair. The setting was serene and honest. Nothing was contrived or exaggerated. It was as pure as nature could be.

“It’s beautiful, Roxie.”

“I know. It’s pretty special. I come here when I need some peace.”

“Hmmm.” He pointed toward a cluster of butterflies batting their wings back and forth as they clung to the trunk of a nearby tree.

“Did you know butterflies have four complete transformations in their life?”

“Four?” He cocked his head.

“They start as eggs, then become caterpillars, then they become a chrysalis, and from the chrysalis emerges a butterfly.”

“Huh.” A bright yellow butterfly with brown trimming on its wings landed on Henry’s knee. “Hey, look.”

“I see it.”

We watched in silence as the butterfly slowly flipped its wings up and down. When a second butterfly tried to join the first, the two insects took flight and disappeared amongst the dense foliage.

“I know you’re going to think I’m silly, but sometimes I feel like I’m a butterfly.”

“First, I never think you’re silly—funny maybe, but not silly. And second, I’m sure you have a good reason for thinking this.”

I fiddled with the ring on my thumb. “Three times in my life, I’ve had to make a complete transformation.”

He didn’t respond.

“When I moved in with Nathan, I went from a twenty-two-year-old living with her parents to learning to look after a man.”

“Why did he need looking after?”

I continued to spin the ring. “He didn’t need it, I suppose. He just liked me to look after him.”

“Okay. . . and the next transformation?”

“Was when he walked out on me. I had to learn to live on my own.”

“Yeah, I know what you mean. It can be a difficult time. And the third?”

I cocked my head. “To hear the third one, you need to let me buy you lunch.”

He chuckled. “Oh, I don’t know, that’s a big ask.”

I playfully slapped his shoulder.

“Okay then.” He grinned.

On the way out, Mavis cornered us to ask what we thought of her farm. Henry gushed at Mavis, congratulating her on such a wonderful project, and soon, the woman was blushing from ear to ear.

We hopped back in the car, and I directed him toward the ocean. Ten minutes later, we pulled into a parking space outside a small fish and chip shop.

We purchased fresh prawns, a loaf of bread, and a tub of coleslaw. I loved how easy our decisions had been; it was like we’d planned our meal ahead of time. With our purchases in hand, we walked toward a picnic table nestled beneath a couple of healthy Pandanus palms.

Our view was postcard-perfect. To my left was the iconic Main Beach pier, which was dotted with dozens of people who’d cast fishing lines over the side. Golden sand spread out before us, and beyond that was a dark blue ocean for as far as I could see.

We sat side by side and, working together, peeled all the prawns first. With that done, we both made prawn and coleslaw sandwiches. Humble yet delicious. Especially as the prawns were so fresh.

“Yum,” he said after his first bite.

“I know.”

“Is this another one of your rituals?”

“Ah huh, the final step in my mental cleansing is always eating prawns while overlooking the beach.”

He nodded as if he totally understood my reasoning.

After we finished, we tossed our garbage in the trash before the seagulls took over the table. We sat with our backs against the weathered wood, and Henry wove his hand into mine. If he was eagerly waiting for my final butterfly moment, then he was masking his curiosity very well.

I thought I’d never tell the story about my abortion, yet here I was, considering telling it for a second time on the same day. From the moment we’d driven away from the butterfly house, I’d had a mental debate over whether or not it was a wise decision to voice my dark past.

But I decided that even though our relationship was very early, I wanted Henry to know everything about me. So, I might as well get the worst out of the way early. Especially as, over the years, I’d often wondered if Nathan would’ve stayed had he known the truth.

Whatever happened once the words left my lips was in Henry’s hands.

As it seemed that Henry could wait all day, I decided to get the discussion over with. “When I was sixteen years old, I did something that. . . well, it changed my life forever.”

Henry didn’t show any reaction; instead, he nudged his shoulder to mine, patiently waiting for me to continue, and squeezed my hand.

His relaxed demeanor had my tangled emotions skyrocketing much quicker than I’d planned. Almost the second I said the word abortion, tears tumbled down my cheeks. While I flicked them away, he squeezed my hand. Although I’d originally planned to gloss over the aspects, Henry had a way of making me open up like I’d never done before.

As the breeze drifted up to us, bringing both a cooler temperature and a fresh ocean scent, I told him every sordid detail about the tragedy that ruined my life. But I didn’t stop there; I went on to explain the aftermath and my dysfunctional relationship with my parents as a consequence of their actions.

When I finished, he curled his arm around my shoulder, tugged me to him, and kissed my cheek. “Thank you for telling me.”

“Thank you for listening.”

“You know what? Your reference to being a butterfly is absolutely perfect. After everything you’ve been through, you have emerged to be one of the most beautiful, compassionate, and vibrant women I’ve ever met. Most people would have gone crazy following all that horror.”

To hear him say those words after what I’d revealed made my heart sing.

For a long time, we just sat there in silence. And as I listened to his thumping heart and the tumbling waves, I realized just how wonderful and cleansed I felt. It was like I’d finally been released from my dark past and a giant door was open to a new and wonderful world.

I eased back from him, and with a grin curling at my lips, I said, “Speaking of going crazy, would you like to meet my cat?”

His face lit up with a smile. “I’d love to.”

We returned to the car, and I directed him toward the Gold Coast highway, and we merged into the abundant traffic again.

“Why is your cat crazy?”

“Oh, is that your question?”

“Well, it’s a question, but it’s not the question of the day.”

“Hmmm, I think you’re changing the rules.”

He smiled. “Maybe.”

I pulled my knee onto the seat so I could watch him drive. He was a calm driver, and after spending many nail-biting hours in the car with Nathan, this was a pleasure to watch.

“Crazy is his name too, by the way, and he’s all black except for one white foot. He just turned up in my backyard one day. I found him sleeping in a large plant pot, and he scared the crap out of me when I first saw him. I tried to find his owner, did a letterbox drop in the street, and took him to my local vet, but as no one claimed him, he just became mine.”

“But why did you call him Crazy?”

“Because he sleeps in the weirdest of spots. I’ve found him on the roof of my car. Under my sofa—and I mean up in the springs, and I have no idea how he squeezes under there. And he has this look like he’s almost smiling, like he’s a little bit crazy. So the name suited. Do you have a pet?”

“No. When the kids were little, we had a dog, but once Ralph passed away, we didn’t get around to getting another one. Which was good because a dog would have been just another thing my wife would have fought over in the divorce.”

“It was nasty, huh.”

“Oh yeah. She had her claws out. And I have no idea why. It was she who screwed around.”

“Do you know how long they had the affair before you found out?”

He turned to me, stony-faced. “Three years.”

“Oh shit, that’s terrible.”

“Yeah, I always thought I was a good judge of character, but she ruined that for me.”

“I know exactly what you mean. Once you’ve had your trust broken, it’s pretty hard to offer it again.”

When we looked at each other, a sense of knowing crossed between us. And although it was foolish, given the short amount of time we’d known each other, I felt like I could trust Henry with all my deepest secrets. Then again, I already had.

“Okay, turn here. This is my street.”

“Hmmm, fancy.” He was correct. The houses that lined this street were actually mansions. They were ultra-modern, with whitewashed walls and giant slabs of granite being the most common themes. Enormous windows graced the grand portages allowing us to see into imposing staircases and polished marble floors. Every time I drove into this street, I felt like a fraud.

“Don’t get too excited. You know that saying that you should buy the worst house in the best street?”

“Ah huh.”

“Well, that’s my home. My house is the only one in the street that hasn’t been knocked down and replaced.”

As he pulled into my driveway, I realized that Henry was the first man I’d ever brought to my home. My stomach rolled at the thought, and I did a mental flashback to how tidy it was when I’d left the house over a week ago. But I couldn’t remember. Too late now.

At the front door, I fumbled with the keys and heard Crazy scratching at the wood on the other side. I pushed it open, and the cat wrapped his body around my legs.

“Hey, fella.” I scooped Crazy into my arms, and he purred and nuzzled into my embrace.

“I think someone missed you.”

“Yeah, I think you’re right. It’s the first time I’ve left him. Janet from next door has been cat-sitting and feeding him for me. Anyway.” I stepped further into the room. “Here we are, home sweet home.”

As his eyes scanned my living room, I wondered what he was thinking. My eclectic furniture was similar to my fashion style. My bed was the only thing I’d ever bought brand new; everything else was secondhand, so as a consequence, nothing matched. But ironically, the mismatch made everything complement each other. At least, that’s what I thought.

“It’s really lovely.”

“You’re just saying that.”

“No, I’m not, Roxie. This feels like a home. I get the feeling that every piece in here has a story.”

I giggled. “I guess you’re right. Come on through to the kitchen, and I’ll grab us a drink.”

I led the way. “Take a seat.” I indicated to the bar stool beneath the kitchen counter. As I opened the fridge, I prayed I had wine in there. My wish was granted, and I plucked the bottle out, shut the door, and reached for a couple of glasses that were dangling from the rack beneath a wooden shelf on the wall.

“I love this kitchen,” Henry said. “It’s rustic and homely.”

My heart swelled. “Thank you. I love it, too. It’s cozy and practical, and it suits me.” I topped up the two glasses. “The place was a mess when I bought it, though. It had been rented for about ten years, and the tenants must have been feral. There were holes in the walls that looked like they’d been made with fists. And when they painted the walls, they only painted as high as they could reach.”

“No?” A frown rippled his forehead.

“It’s true. That door trim had eleven layers of paint. Oh, and get this—one of the bedrooms had carpet squares, but when they changed the carpet, they didn’t move the bed, so there was a giant rectangle in a different color.”

He laughed. “That’s hilarious.”

“I guess so. But the good news was that I got it for an absolute bargain.” I handed a glass to him and raised mine for a toast. “It’s my turn to make a toast.”

When he held his glass to mine, I felt the pressure to say something profound. “To the best Christmas ever.”

His grin lit up his face. “I have to agree, best Christmas ever.”

I came around to his side of the counter, and when I went to wriggle into the bar stool at Henry’s side, he grabbed my hips. “Come here, you.” He nudged my hips between his legs so our faces were at level height. Henry reached up and curled some hair behind my ear, and the gesture was so tender it melted my already softened heart. “You are so beautiful.”

“Pfft.” I rolled my eyes.

“Roxie, you’re a breath of fresh air. Most women hide under a veil of makeup and fancy clothes. But you, you embrace your natural beauty. Where have you been all my life?”

When he placed his palm on my cheek, I leaned forward and answered him with a kiss. Our lips touched, and I melted into him. His kiss was delicate, soft, barely touching, yet it was incredibly intoxicating.

Our lips teased. Our breaths mingled.

My heart was in serious trouble.