11. Loren
11
LOREN
I didn’t dare look back as I left work, but I felt the burn of his stare on my back.
With all these modernistic, fancy glass walls, nothing was hidden here.
We sure didn’t hide anything when he asked to speak to me in the hallway.
I huffed a laugh as I exited the building, late at night. Matt didn’t ask to speak with me. He’d ordered it, and I felt so ashamed and silly to like that tone and attitude from him. It was similar to how he’d gotten during our one night together. When he’d get a little more dominant and tell me what he wanted from me, then switching to a tender lover and asking me what I needed from him.
How could he be such a great guy between the sheets but a crappy man at the office? It was starting to seem like a Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde situation. Hot and cold.
I supposed I had no right to anticipate warmth from him, though. Despite the hungry, hot way he stared at me when I almost lost my common sense and kissed him, he wasn’t inclined to pursue anything but a work relationship with me.
And that’s how it should be, right? Just focus on work. Buckle down and do your job. Nothing more.
That was what I should’ve listened to. I had no right to want him, but his leaning close to me was a mixed message.
Does he want me, too, but won’t admit it or act on it because we work at the same office?
I went to bed that night, and the next few, agonized over how I should interpret my enigma of a grumpy boss.
When it finally came time for my dinner “date” with Hailey, a chance to catch up with her outside the Richards building over lunch hour on the days our schedules lined up, I was relieved to have a sounding board.
But when I arrived, I talked myself out of the ludicrous idea of telling my friend—and coworker—that I’d slept with my boss. That one-night stand felt like a naughty, dirty secret that no one should ever learn about. The idea of having some insightful girl talk would’ve been helpful, but I couldn’t risk it. Hell, I was half worried I could get fired if someone found out. It was as though we’d planned it. The chemistry of even meeting each other… We kept it anonymous, with no names or details for that one fling.
She was already at the inexpensive but cute-looking Italian restaurant. “There you are!” She waved me over, cheery and happy as ever.
“Am I glad to see you.” I sat after we hugged. “A person who smiles,” I teased with exaggerated mock shock. “Imagine that!”
She laughed lightly as I shook my head. “You know, even I heard about today’s argument.”
“You did?” I raised my brows. Matt and I had made a habit of bickering. At first, I thought that our inability to see eye-to-eye was a strength, that I could point out his flaws and he could let me be aware of mine and we could both somehow improve ourselves.
Now, I was convinced he pissed me off however he could just to get a rise out of me.
“Yeah, I was up on the executive floor getting some papers signed and I caught a bit of it.”
I growled, shaking my head again. “That man is… insufferable!”
“Hey, I did warn you that he could be a jerk,” she replied.
She had. When she first suggested that I apply for the job vacancy, she gave me a heads-up that the boss was known to be a grouch, a hot-headed person few liked to be around. And now I knew firsthand. At that time when I interviewed, though, I assumed I wouldn’t be hired to work with someone so high up. I anticipated being a lower employee, starting out at the bottom of the ladder to work my way up.
And I also know when and how he’s not a grouch. In bed, holding on tight as I ? —
I cleared my throat and hurried to sip my glass of water. Perhaps a drink of something cool could counter the heat of the blush and stop it from taking over my face with that naughty, forbidden thought about Matt.
“I was kind of surprised when word started to spread at the office about you two fighting. Not fighting , fighting, but being argumentative.”
I furrowed my brow, skimming the menu and looking for the cheapest and simplest meal. Money was tight. New York was expensive, even with the basic studio I was renting. I had to be frugal. With my stomach still funky, on and off uneasy, I didn’t see a point in ordering something pricy if my appetite wouldn’t last for it.
“Why? Because everyone else just nods and does as he says?”
“No. And it doesn’t sound like you’re being disobedient or anything.”
“I’m also not nodding along and doing what he says just because.”
“You shouldn’t. I’ve just heard that you give him as good as you get.” She smiled. “That bubbly, happy-go-lucky approach you have sure fools a lot of people into assuming you could be a weak pushover, someone to walk all over.”
I smiled. “Nope. Not me. I’ve had enough experience with that where my sister is concerned.”
She sighed. “Has she been bothering you still?”
“Nope.” I let the P pop in that one-word reply. “I blocked her number a month ago when she called again to belittle me.”
“Good. Good for you. You don’t need that negativity in your life.”
“Yeah, now that I’ve gone no contact with my first nemesis, I’ve got another one to bother me.”
“Matt’s your nemesis?”
I cringed, hating how catty that sounded. “He is a good boss. He’s a hard worker, and he has high expectations…”
I just hate that he has shoved me out like a thing of the past. I didn’t know how we could make a relationship work, if he was at all interested. We worked together, and there had to be rules on how company employees couldn’t get together.
It was his rejection, I supposed, that stung. Particularly because I missed that connection we had for such a short time.
“And he’s got a lot of pressure. I heard that Wendy?—”
“Wendy?”
“The CEO, his grandma. Wendy Richards.”
I nodded, the name clicking. “Right.”
We paused to order our meals, and my stomach roiled. I hoped I could manage a few bites, at least. If this persisted, maybe I’d need to find a doctor and see if it was something more than stress bothering me. Maybe a bug or a slight infection.
“What was I saying? Oh, yeah. Wendy. She told him that he could have her position as CEO if he signed Gammon as a client.”
“ Ooh .” I nodded slowly. “He sure has a lot of motivation, then.”
“Yeah. He’s been rumored to become CEO any day now. With Wendy getting older, the announcement could come.”
“Why the big deal about Gammon, though?” I couldn’t recall all the details I’d learned since starting there a month ago, but there were many accounts and clients to pay attention to.
“Well, DuPont—Have you heard of them?”
“Yes, I have. The other guys on the team keep guessing what they’re going to propose in their pitch to Gammon.”
“Aaron DuPont is an old… enemy? I don’t know what to call him. He and Matt went to Havard together, and I think that was the start of their rivalry. Maybe with grades? Scores? Awards?” She waved her hand as though to clear the air. “I don’t know. Anyway. Aaron is high up at his family’s company, a direct competitor to the Richardses. I think that Wendy tried to get the Gammon mega corp to go with her, but some good old boys’ club thing had them going with DuPont.”
I smirked. The good old boys. I hated that stupid mindset. It was a blessing that Rupert, Brad, and Eli made sure I fit in on the team. Tom was another matter, but it was far better just to not think about him at all.
“I assume Wendy just sees the acquisition of Gammon as a good challenge for Matt to focus on. A good challenge for him to prove himself to her to get her job.”
“Matt as CEO…” I set my chin in my hand. “I could see it.”
And with that vision, I could see how much harder it would be to ever get him for myself. Me, a nobody from small-town Pennsylvania, landing the sexy and successful billionaire CEO? He was already untouchable as my boss, but as the whole company’s boss, it’d be impossible to make that leap.
We continued to talk about work, gossiping mostly, but then we chatted about this and that too. It felt good to relax with her, but by the end of the night, I was beat. It wasn’t terribly late, but I was so damn tired. My feet ached. My back felt unusually sore. I hadn’t managed much of my dinner, and as I walked home, my leftovers in a container in my hand, I doubted I’d want to eat that tomorrow, either.
I yawned as I reached my building, trudging up the stairs. Once again, I debated how much longer it would take to adjust to this hectic, faster-paced life in the city.