Chapter 10
Devon
“D on’t,” I ground out as Reese tried to scramble off my lap.
I tightened my hold on her and willed my body to relax.
“We need to talk about this,” I demanded. “I think it’s obvious that I’m attracted to you.”
It had to be obvious since the evidence of that attraction was pressing hard against her gorgeous ass.
I was relieved when her body started to relax against me.
I hated myself for bringing those tempting lips against mine, but a stampede of wild horses wasn’t going to stop me from kissing her.
However, my brain was now going to check myself.
“I’m definitely not going to claim that I didn’t want that,” she told me emphatically. “But I shouldn’t have kissed you.”
I chuckled. I couldn’t help it. “I think I was the one who kissed you, sweetheart.”
“Whatever,” she said in a flippant voice. “I certainly wasn’t resisting. I was participating enthusiastically. I guess it’s apparent that I’m attracted to you, too.”
Damn! I loved to hear those words from her lips, even though I shouldn’t be ridiculously glad that she’d said them out loud.
This attraction between us couldn’t go anywhere, but I wanted her to want me.
That was probably a little twisted, but I didn’t give a shit.
“I can never be the man you need and deserve, Reese,” I said honestly.
“And you really don’t know everything about me,” she rationalized. “I know it was wrong, but I don’t regret it. I can’t. But I know things can’t go any further between the two of us.”
I couldn’t honestly say I regretted it, either.
But that taste of Reese had just made me want her more.
Fuck! I really was screwed.
My feelings for Reese had morphed into something different over the last two weeks.
Yeah, I still wanted her in my bed moaning my name while she had multiple orgasms.
But I felt weirdly protective of her, too.
I wasn’t trying to pry information out of her anymore. I’d given up when my protective instincts had taken over.
I cared about her.
I didn’t want her to be afraid anymore.
And I wasn’t worried that she’d ever hurt anyone in my family.
Did I want her to tell me her secrets?
Hell, yes, I did, but not at the price of her sanity.
I wanted her to feel safe enough that she could tell me anything before that happened.
I needed her to trust me, and I was an impatient asshole.
Real trust was going to take some time.
“So no more kissing,” Reese said firmly. “I consider you my friend, Devon.”
Hell, I would have been honored to hear that if I didn’t want to fuck her six ways to Sunday.
There was definitely a friendship dynamic in this relationship, but that sure as hell wasn’t all there was to our relationship.
“What happens if we slip up and do it again in the future?” I asked in a frustrated tone.
I couldn’t guarantee that it wouldn’t happen again, although I’d try to avoid it.
If Reese was anywhere near me, I wanted her.
All I could promise her was that I’d try not to let it happen again.
She let out an adorable little snort against my shoulder. “Then I guess we’ll tell each other it can’t happen again one more time.” She lifted her head to look at me. “I’d do the friends with benefits thing with you in a heartbeat if I didn’t feel like it was wrong because I can’t tell you everything. I’ve never done that before, but I’d do it with you.”
My dick twitched, and it was screaming at me to try to get her into that type of arrangement. However…
I shook my head. “You need to find the right guy for you. You deserve to find someone who can give you everything you need, not just multiple orgasms.”
It almost killed me to say that, but I knew it was true.
Her eyes widened in mock surprise. “Multiple? That’s a little bit cocky. Especially since I’m not the kind of woman who does multiple orgasms.”
It felt strangely normal to discuss sex with Reese, which was odd.
I didn’t usually talk about sex with a woman.
We just…did it.
I shrugged. “I guarantee you can be.”
Her cheeks started to flush, which was the cutest thing I’d ever seen.
I hadn’t known any women who blushed about anything sexual.
“It’s never happened,” she said in a slightly flustered voice. “Generally, it doesn’t even happen a first time.”
“That’s only because you’ve never been with the right guy,” I informed her bluntly. “A real man makes sure his woman is satisfied.”
I didn’t stop her this time when she slipped off my lap.
She fanned herself with her hand. “I think I need a little space.”
I smirked. “Getting a little warm? We’re human, Reese. Humans like good, hot, sweaty sex.”
“I’m starting to think I’ve never really had good sex,” she muttered as she plopped back into her chair. “Let’s change the subject, please.”
“You started it with the friends with benefits thing,” I protested.
“I know,” she said with a sigh. “But that was probably a mistake. I think you might be a little too hot for me to handle.”
“I think that’s exactly what you want,” I mused. “I think you’ve just never asked for what you deserve.”
What kind of idiots had she been with in the past?
None of those bastards had deserved a responsive, passionate woman like Reese, that was for sure.
“It’s hard to ask for what you want when the guy is drunk and just back from a party,” she shot back.
“You deserve a lot more than that,” I said gruffly.
“I know,” she said woefully. “That’s why I haven’t had a boyfriend in a long time. I wasn’t making good choices. I decided I was better off alone until I could find someone who really cared about me.”
“And there were no prospects?” I questioned.
“I guess it really hasn’t been my priority,” she confessed. “And it’s not easy to meet a nice guy, even in a bigger city. I’m not much of a clubber anymore, and I haven’t tried dating apps. I did a few blind dates with friends of friends, but they were a disaster. We just didn’t…click. And I absolutely won’t date somebody from the same workplace. I think that’s trouble waiting to happen. Who wants to keep running into an ex-boyfriend at work if it doesn’t work out?”
I had to agree with her. I never hooked up with anyone I worked with at the office. That would be awkward, especially since I was the boss.
“I think I finally got philosophical about the whole dating thing,” she informed me. “I guess it will happen when it happens.”
“Everyone in town will start to try to fix you up with their single relatives pretty soon,” I warned her.
She laughed. “It’s already happening. I’ve been working with some of your mother’s friends on the spring fundraiser. All of them are throwing me prospects.”
Oh, hell no!
For some reason I didn’t really want to see Reese dating someone in town.
“And?” I prompted.
“Um…it was a no to all of them,” she confided. “I don’t want to date anyone right now, Devon. It’s not the right time for me.”
I hated myself for being relieved, but I was.
“I don’t think you’re missing anything,” I said. “The townspeople aren’t particularly good matchmakers. They just want to see everyone married and happy. Especially their single relatives. There aren’t a lot of single people here. A lot of my friends got married to their high school sweethearts and stayed to raise their families here. It’s rare that someone like you moves here voluntarily.”
“I have to admit that I actually like it here,” she shared. “It’s different. The pace is slower. But it’s a beautiful place with friendly people who all help each other. It’s a real…community.”
“Sometimes that’s a pain in the ass, but I missed it when I lived in New York,” I told her honestly. “I had my brothers there, but I missed the wide-open spaces and being able to see the stars at night. I craved the sounds of nature and the peace of silence that you can never get in a big city. I missed that sense of a tightknit community when I didn’t have it anymore. I grew up on a ranch, and it’s probably in my blood. I ride as often as possible to make up for the years that I couldn’t.”
“You’re so good with your horses,” she said. “I’m sure you learned all of that from your parents.”
“Mostly my dad,” I admitted.
“I’m sure you miss him,” she said gently.
“Every single day,” I answered. “It was a tough time in all of our lives when he died, but we got through it together. It was a wake-up call for all of us not to take anything for granted. Life is short, which is why we all try to find our personal lives outside of work now. Remington was our life for a while. We grew up enough to realize that work isn’t our entire lives.”
“I admire that about you,” Reese said. “You’re a billionaire. It would be really easy to get caught up in the power and that lifestyle and make it your entire life. You don’t.”
“Oh, I did,” I answered. “All three of us did. That’s why Tanner and Hannah broke up years ago. We all had our heads up our asses and weren’t paying attention to our real priorities. Luckily, the knucklehead got a second chance. That’s definitely not happening again.”
Reese got up and started to grab the dishes. “Hannah told me a little about what happened. The two of them are really happy now, but that separation was hard for both of them.”
I took the dishes from her hands. “Hey, cleanup is my job. You cook; I take care of the dishes.”
She picked up my dishes and followed me to the sink. “I can help. I’m not going anywhere. I’m just trying to let my food settle before I work out since you insisted on eating first.”
I’d been starving by the time we’d finished our long ride, so I’d talked her into getting food first today.
“I was hungry,” I grumbled.
Reese actually giggled. “You’re always hungry.”
“What about that banana bread you brought today?” I asked hopefully.
She sent me a scolding look. “Later. You said you wanted to work out with me, and you can’t have a bunch of food on your stomach right before you work out.”
I knew better, but I’d done it a number of times anyway.
Since I wasn’t really hungry anymore, I let Reese have her way.
We made short work of cleanup, and that’s when I noticed that things had changed a little between the two of us.
I invaded her personal space, and she had no problem invading mine.
I’d never realized how much we’d had to work not to touch each other before that kiss when we were in close quarters.
That short interlude had changed everything between the two of us, and that probably wasn’t a good thing.
Before that kiss, I’d avoided touching her physically.
Since that kiss, all I fucking wanted to do was touch her.
From now on, I was going to have to listen to my head and not my body or my instincts.
I’d had some hard challenges in my life, but something told me that not touching Reese again was going to be one of the hardest things I’d ever had to do.