Chapter 29
Hannah
“A re you okay, Hannah?” Reese queried quietly as she stopped at my open office door.
I looked up from my computer and plastered a smile on my face. “I’m good. Why?”
“You’re really quiet,” she said as she stepped into my office. “And when you got back from Billings, you looked like you’d been crying.”
Reese and I were close, and I considered her my friend.
We spent at least eight hours a day together in the office, and we talked and hung out as friends. At first I’d done it because she was alone here in Crystal Fork. Now, I spent time with her because I honestly cared about her.
Luckily, Lauren and Anna adored Reese, too, so we all hung out together when we could.
Reese was easy to talk to, and she was so empathetic. I didn’t really want to lie to her, and there wasn’t much she didn’t know about my life.
“Tanner told me that he wanted to marry me,” I said.
“And that made you cry?” she asked, sounding confused.
“Everything makes me want to cry right now,” I confessed. “I don’t know what in the hell is wrong with me.”
I could cry for no apparent reason these days.
“Are you still queasy?” she asked. “I know your stomach was bothering you this morning.”
“I’m better,” I shared. “Maybe I was just a little nervous about the meeting with the contractors.”
“Hannah, this has been happening to you every morning for a few weeks now. I think you should see a doctor,” Reese said gently. “Are you and Tanner getting married?”
“No,” I said as my eyes welled up with tears. “I was so shocked when he mentioned getting married that I couldn’t really respond to him right away. Reese, he’s never even told me that he loved me, and I haven’t said those words yet. The comment just happened out of the blue. By the time I was ready to talk, he’d already taken my lack of response wrong. I think we just broke up.”
“Oh, Hannah,” Reese answered in a soothing voice. “There’s no way that man just broke up with you. He’s crazy about you. Everyone can see that. I think it was just a misunderstanding. Do you want to marry him?”
I nodded and swallowed hard to get the lump out of my throat. “There’s no one else for me but Tanner. I tried to date once or twice in Seattle, but it never felt right, and it went nowhere. Any guy I met would never be right for me because I was still in love with Tanner. I finally gave up on dating altogether.”
“Then just tell him you want to marry him,” Reese suggested.
“I tried. He blew me off,” I said wistfully.
“He was defensive because you didn’t immediately say yes ,” she concluded.
“I think so,” I said thoughtfully. “But he was so nonchalant about the whole thing. It stung. That’s why I was crying.”
Tanner’s reaction had hurt, and I’d been sure he was breaking up with me.
After I’d thought about it, I wasn’t so sure.
Certainly, a guy couldn’t say he wanted to get married one moment and then decide to blow me off a few moments later.
Tanner cared about me.
I was certain about that.
“He’ll get over it,” Reese said. “Men are idiots sometimes. I’m sure he was disappointed, but I have to say that wasn’t the way to show it. He probably thought you were breaking up with him.”
“How can he possibly not know that he’s my entire life now,” I said adamantly. “I love him. I’ve always loved him.”
“Take my word for it,” Reese replied. “Men can be incredibly dense when it comes to emotions sometimes. They react before they think. Everything will be okay, Hannah. That man loves you. He’ll come to his senses. He’s definitely a keeper, even if he does make mistakes sometimes. He spoils you, and he’s always there to help with Glam Anywhere without intruding on your business. I’ve seen you two together a lot. He worships the ground you walk on. If I wasn’t your friend, I’d probably be jealous. I have no idea what it’s like to be with a guy like that.”
I smiled at her. “You’re young. You’ll meet someone someday.”
She shook her head, her eyes a little panicked. “Not interested. I’m not dating.”
I knew that, but I wasn’t sure why.
Reese was twenty-eight, not that much older than I’d been when Tanner and I had broken up.
She was certainly a lot more mature and together than I’d been at her age.
The woman was also gorgeous, and if not for her standoffish attitude with men, they’d be falling all over her.
“Do you want to hit The Mug And Jug with me after work?” I asked. “I could probably use a cocktail.”
“I’m not sure that’s a good idea,” Reese said carefully.
My eyes widened. “Why?”
She let out a deep breath. “Hannah, has it ever occurred to you that you could be…pregnant? The signs are all there. The morning nausea. The emotional reactions because your hormones are raging. And you said you missed your period about ten days ago.”
Stunned, I stared at Reese, my mind whirling. “That’s not possible. I’m on birth control, Reese.”
She nodded. “Yes, but you had that viral gastroenteritis not that long ago. You vomited almost everything you put into your system for at least two days. Is it possible you threw up more than one or two pills? You’re usually safe if you miss one, but two is iffy, and three or more is usually a problem.”
My mind flew back to that time that I’d had a short stomach flu.
I’d only been sick for two days, but the brief illness had started the night before, right after I’d taken my birth control pill.
For the next two days, I had thrown up most of what I’d put into my stomach. Once that virus had passed, I’d felt perfectly fine.
God, not once had I considered that I could be pregnant, and my mind still couldn’t quite accept the possibility. “I’m really irregular sometimes even though I’m on birth control,” I rationalized.
“I bought a pregnancy test when I went out for lunch because I suspected you could be pregnant,” Reese replied. “There’s only one way to find out. It’s been ten days since your missed period. It will be accurate.”
I nodded. “I guess I need to know.”
Honestly, it probably was possible.
Unfortunately, I’d never even thought about it when I was sick.
Tanner and I probably should have used an alternate method of birth control.
“How is it that a woman who has never had to deal with pregnancy knows so much about it?” I asked Reese.
She shot me a smile. “I guess I’m a sponge when it comes to soaking in useless knowledge and facts.”
With that, she went to retrieve the test from her purse. She watched with me a few minutes later as we waited for the results, both of us leaning over my desk, our eyes glued to that pregnancy test.
She took my hand, and I clung to it like it was my lifeline.
It wasn’t that I didn’t want to have a child someday with Tanner.
I just hadn’t expected that to happen…now.
Not before things were settled for the two of us.
Not before we were married and ready to have a child.
God, I didn’t even know if Tanner and I were still together right now.
And I had no idea if he still wanted the child or two we’d hypothetically talked about years ago.
My heart raced as the first line showed up, which Reese had explained was the control line.
When the second line started to appear and grew stronger until it was just as bright as the control line, tears filled my eyes.
“You’re pregnant, Hannah,” Reese said softly.
I felt a little lightheaded as I stared at the results like I expected them to change.
“Sit down,” Reese ordered as she urged me into my chair. “You look like you’re about to topple over. Are you happy?”
Tears flowed down my cheeks as I nodded and put a hand to my flat belly instinctively. “I’m just not sure what Tanner’s reaction is going to be.”
“He’s going to be hovering over you, and worried about you,” Reese said calmly. “And underneath all that worry, he’s going to be ecstatic. Whatever little tiff you had is going to get worked out. I’m going to find you a good OB doctor in Billings and make an appointment for you. You need to get started on prenatal vitamins now. Trust me? I’ll find you the best OB doctor in Billings. There’s no one who specializes in OB here in Crystal Fork. I’d like to make that appointment today.”
I nodded, still not over my shock, so I was happy to let Reese handle those arrangements for now since she seemed to know more about pregnancy than I did.
I briefly wondered if Reese had actually been pregnant before, but I knew she didn’t have any children.
“I’ll be back after I make that appointment,” she told me as she walked toward the door. “Stay in that chair until you’ve processed the fact that you’re pregnant.”
I let out a deep breath when Reese left the room, grateful that she’d been here with me when I’d gotten those results.
“I’m pregnant,” I said aloud, my hand on my belly, my voice filled with awe.
My business was still growing, and it was so new, but I’d work everything out.
There was no reason that I couldn’t work through a healthy pregnancy, and Reese was so intelligent that she could already handle anything that came up.
My eyes flitted to my phone, and I realized that Tanner had texted me.
I looked at the clock and realized he was probably about to go into his meeting soon.
I picked up my phone and held my breath as I looked at his text.
Tanner: I’m sorry I acted like an asshole. I should have heard you out instead of reacting like an idiot. I still want to marry you, Hannah, but I can wait if you’re not ready for that. Can we talk at dinner? I’ll get home as soon as I can after the meeting.
Relief flooded through my body.
He didn’t want to break up.
His reaction had been instinctive because he thought I didn’t want to marry him.
I’d hurt him, and I hated that.
Part of me wanted to rush over to his house after work, but at the moment, I felt completely drained, and I wasn’t sure I was ready to tell him about my pregnancy before I’d really absorbed that information myself.
I yawned, longing for my bed.
That exhaustion had been happening a lot for me lately. That was probably another thing I’d rationalized, telling myself that it was too many late nights burning up the sheets with Tanner.
Right now, all I wanted to do was sleep.
I wasn’t sure I was emotionally ready to spring the news on Tanner tonight, and it was going to be a long day for him.
It was Friday, and we had all day tomorrow.
Hannah: Just get some sleep, Tanner. We’ll talk tomorrow. I think I’d like to get to sleep early. I’ll come over for lunch.
I sent the message and then realized that I hadn’t said anything to let Tanner know that I wasn’t upset about this afternoon.
Hannah: P.S. If you had waited for my shock to wear off, I would have told you that I’d marry you tomorrow if that wasn’t too soon.
He didn’t answer, which didn’t surprise me.
It had been a while since he’d texted, and his meeting was about to start.
He probably didn’t expect me to answer until I closed the office.
I put my phone into my purse, deciding to leave a little early since I didn’t have anything urgent to attend to at the moment.
Reese shooed me out the door as soon as she saw me yawn, informing me before I left that I had a doctor’s appointment on Monday.
I went back to my apartment, forced myself to eat something because I was eating for my baby, too, and went straight to bed.