Chapter 27
Juniper
“Can William read me my bedtime story?”
Juniper looked at William in inquiry and he nodded. He was putting a very good face on it, interacting with Billy as he always did, keeping it light and fun.
As William read Billy his book, Juniper sat down on the edge of the deck that ran under the breezeway that connected the house to the shop and looked up at the sky.
There was a half-moon peeking through some scattered clouds and a light dusting of stars.
She drew a deep breath, marshaling all her resolve for the conversation she was about to have.
She could hear William and Billy through the open bedroom window, William’s voice deep and mellow, working to calm Billy’s overexcited chatter.
It took a little while and she let it play out, until finally she saw the light switch off.
Then William was moving quietly through the door and to her side.
He sat next to her on the edge of the deck.
“I can’t live in Sydney.”
“No.”
“I wish I was stronger,” she said, fervently.
He took her hand. “Don’t say that.”
She smiled sadly. He’d been saying that a lot lately.
“You can’t live here and fulfill your commitments to your family and your business.”
“No.”
“What then? We live a half-life where you bounce into Blessed Inlet between location scouting missions? I sneak up to Sydney when you’re in town for a dirty weekend?
On those weekends when you have no parties to attend, of course, because I can’t do those.
And what about Billy? He loves you. He would only be confused by it all. ”
He nodded.
“So where does that leave us?”
He didn’t answer.
“One of us has to say it, William.”
“I know.”
“Are you going to make it be me?”
“I don’t have the strength to do it. You’re stronger than me.”
No, she wasn’t. She felt a lump form in her throat, choking her as tears welled in her eyes.
She got up and wandered away, across the yard, heard his footsteps behind her.
She turned to him, gripping his shirt front in her fists.
God, it hurt. So much. He held her so tight she could barely breathe and yet she wanted him to hold her tighter still.
“I want you to do something for me.”
He loosened his hold marginally. “What?”
“Do it quickly.”
He took a shuddering breath, his voice tight when he said, “I can be gone tomorrow.”
She quivered. That was too quick, but really, it was just torture to drag it out, so she said, “Okay.” She turned in his arms and looked up at the moon.
“I won’t keep the lighthouse. Any ties I keep here are only going to torture us both.”
She sighed, leaning her head back against his shoulder. “Will you do one more thing for me?”
“Yes.”
“Stay the night.”
He blew out a breath. “Of course.”
They made quiet, desperate love and held each other all night long.
Juniper woke with a throbbing headache and a lump in her throat.
She drew a deep, shuddering breath and pulled back to look at William.
He was already awake, the look in his eyes devastating her.
She reached up to brush the hair back from his forehead and he caught her hand, pressing a kiss to her palm.
“I love you,” they said at the same time. Juniper smiled sadly.
They heard the patter of Billy’s feet down the short hallway and Juniper saw the stricken look on William’s face before he masked it, greeting her son with a cheerful smile.
God, her heart hurt. Billy bounced on them both before moving to sit on William’s chest, laughing.
But ever sensitive, he seemed to sense the mood, because he got very quiet, and leaning down, put his hands on either side of William’s face and said, “I love you.”
“I love you, too,” William replied huskily.
Juniper wasn’t sure how much longer she could bear it. “Why don’t we have breakfast?”
She let Billy have coco pops, a rare treat. They did their absolute best to keep it light and fun, but the burden of parting was too hard to bear, making their interaction stilted and false.
Juniper put the breakfast dishes in the sink, gripping the edge of the bench.
She could hardly breathe. She turned to look at William, her heart squeezing painfully.
He was holding Billy quietly in his lap, Billy’s head resting on his shoulder.
He pushed to his feet when he saw Juniper looking at him, carrying Billy outside.
Juniper followed, a hot, prickly feeling overwhelming her as she stepped through the door.
“I have to go now,” William said, rubbing Billy’s back.
“Okay.” Billy wrapped his arms around William’s neck, holding on tight, as William walked down the steps.
He sat down on the edge of the deck, pulling Billy back so he could look at him, brushing his hair back from his forehead tenderly. “I can’t come back anymore.”
“Why?”
“Because I have to go to Sydney and look after my dad.”
“But I need you to look after me.”
Juniper, standing in the doorway, tried to swallow past the lump in her throat.
“Oh, mate, I wish I could. More than anything. But my dad is very sick and if I don’t look after him, he’ll get sicker.” Juniper saw William swallow, then he said thickly, “So, I have to go. Will you do something for me?”
Billy nodded solemnly.
“Will you look after your Mum for me?”
Billy nodded again. Juniper willed the hot tears away as she walked down the steps and took Billy from William.
The very least she could do was not break down in front of him.
Everything that could be said between them had been said, so William just kissed Billy on his golden curls, pressed a hard kiss to Juniper’s lips, then strode across the lawn and through the gate.
Mikayla, sitting at an outdoor table just down the road at Coco’s, with Leah, glanced down at her phone as a message pinged.
She frowned, concerned when she read it.
“Oh, it’s from William. Odd. It just says Juniper needs you.
We’d better go.” They gathered their bags and quickly paid for their coffee before hurrying up the street.
As Mikayla stepped through the gate, she saw Juniper, sitting on the deck with Billy in her arms, frozen still.
She strode over to her, stopping in her tracks as Juniper’s gaze lifted to hers.
The absolute desolation she saw there hit her in the guts.
“William just texted. Said you needed me?”
“He’s gone.” The simple words were said in such a way it was abundantly clear he wasn’t coming back.
Mikayla glanced at Leah, perplexed. She’d texted the day before to ask how things had gone in Sydney, to which Juniper replied Great. W’s family is lovely. So, she couldn’t imagine what had happened between then and now to precipitate the devastation she could see on Juniper’s face.
Leah stepped in, rubbing Billy’s back gently. “Why don’t you come with me, mate?”
Billy untangled himself from his mother, throwing himself into Leah’s arms. “I want William,” his voice broke and he started sobbing.
Juniper reached for him, but Leah shook her head. “I’ve got him,” she said gently, squeezing Juniper’s hand before moving away, her arms wrapped around Billy as she carried him into the house.
“What happened?” Mikayla sat down next to Juniper and put her arm around her shoulders. Juniper shook her head wordlessly. “Oh, honey, I’m sorry.”
The ready sympathy broke through Juniper’s control and she burst into tears, burying her face in Mikayla’s shoulder and just letting go.