26. CHAPTER 26
Zane knocked four times.
I wasn't sure why he knocked. He could walk in or speak into my head. I stood up from my chair, where I had been sitting since I woke up that morning, staring into the abyss. I didn’t know how long I had been sitting there.
My mind split in ten different directions all at once.
The weight of it all overwhelmed me. Sadness knocked, and I refused to acknowledge her.
I greeted Zane, standing in the doorway with an unmistakably dapper appearance.
He wore sleek black leather pants and a long-sleeved black tunic that clung to his sturdy frame.
My gaze shifted to his arm, where a forest green item was folded neatly over it, adding a splash of color to his dark attire.
“Hi, beautiful,” he said, giving me a wry smile. I was sure that my appearance caused that smile. My hair was wildly frizzy and unbrushed. I was only wearing a T-shirt and hadn't showered since the previous day.
“That’s sweet, but I am anything but—”
“My Anam Cara, you are beautiful, especially with your messy hair.” He reached out, cupped my chin, and lifted it, making my eyes meet his. Lightning coursed through my body.
“Tell me what’s wrong?”
"Super tired… That’s all. I’ll be okay.” I smiled at him. One, I was sure he could read right through.
“I brought you a gown for tonight if you’re still planning to attend," he said, grabbing the green dress and unfolding it for me to see.
It was stunning—a deep forest green. The top was made of a tight polyester fabric decorated with small diamond pendants.
The skirt transitioned into a more sheer material, featuring slits on both sides that reached approximately mid-thigh.
It was truly beautiful, and he had chosen this for me.
It brought me joy, something I needed after last night.
Watching Clara fall had been painful but pushing her into the moat was terrible. Micah’s cries were so intense that they made me cry alone. Being a leader was tough, and I had been trying hard to stay strong and lead them, but seeing one of them break was hard.
“It is gorgeous. I will shower and get ready. I lost track of time, as one naturally does. You can go ahead, and I’ll see you out there,” I told him with a small smile.
I grabbed the gown and my shower essentials and headed out the door. He grabbed my arm and pulled me back. His mouth crashed onto mine with fiery rage. He wrapped his arms around me and—
Flash. Darkness. Moving through space. Light.
I opened my eyes, and we were in his room. My eyes were wide.
“You can shower here, and I’ll wait for you.”
“I am so glad you didn’t do that little trick into my chambers earlier. I think I would have perished on the spot. Warning next time, please,” I pleaded.
“As you wish, my Anam Cara,” he said, with that little devious smile that had captivated me from the beginning.
He sat back in his lounge chair. I shuffled into his bathing chambers. I couldn’t deny that I preferred this much more than the shared chambers. I had thought his plan to bring me here for a shower was to get me naked, but I walked into the chambers alone while he remained in his chair.
The shower stall amazed me with its impressive design.
It had two overhead rain showers from the ceiling and two showerheads positioned directly above my shoulders.
All four of them drenched me with perfectly warm water.
Showers always brought me a sense of peace and calm.
I sank to the ground, sat on the floor, and pulled my knees to my chest, letting the water fully envelop me.
I took deep breaths, reminding myself I was okay and that this moment would pass. I closed my eyes .
“Hey—”
Shit. Sleep had pulled me under, and his sudden movement jolted me awake, my heart slamming against my ribs.
“Well, okay then, you fell asleep…” he told me.
“Yeah, I guess I was tired. I'm gonna get out. Sorry.”
“No need to apologize, I am the one sorry for startling you. You know we don’t have to stay long, make an appearance, and disappear afterwards.”
“It’s alright, I am fine.”
He smiled at me, then nodded and headed back into his chambers. I stood up and finished showering before stepping out. The shower was exactly what I needed. It was supposed to be a wonderful day and evening.
The Autumn Equinox celebrations started in the afternoon.
We enjoyed a feast in the dining halls, and later, both the courtyard and outdoor arena would be vibrant with festivities.
Like our initial celebration when lectures began, floating orbs hovered about ten feet above the fields.
Bistro tables were arranged for eating and conversation.
A bar was set up on both sides to serve the cadets.
Throughout the yards, there were games for cadets to enjoy, some more individual and others for teams.
The dress that Zane got me was stunning.
I wasn't sure where he found this gem, but it felt like it was made for me.
The forest green shade enhanced my eyes, shifting them to a cooler, bluer green.
I braided two sections at the front and pulled them back to form a braided crown.
I oil-treated my remaining wavy hair, leaving it down to control the frizz.
I strapped two dagger sheaths around each thigh, with side slits for quick access.
I also wore black flats in case things went wrong.
I left the bathroom and stepped into the bedroom. Zane lounged with his feet up, but when his cloud-blue eyes caught mine, he straightened. He let out a low whistle that shot through me like lightning. I should be accustomed to it by now, but it still left me feeling exposed.
He swung his feet off the stool and rose.
Before I could breathe, he stood in front of me, taller, shadowing my frame.
His gaze locked on mine, heavy and unshakable.
He reached for a strand of my hair, curling it around his finger, tugging just enough to send a shiver racing down my spine.
He leaned in and pressed a kiss to my forehead— soft, disarming.
His hand slid down, closing firmly around mine, grounding me while my heart hammered.
“You ready?” he asked.
“As I’ll ever be.”
“Whenever you are done, we can be done,” he said, before guiding me through the door. I gave him a slight smile and nodded.
The great thing about celebrations was that we weren't required to eat at specific times or stay within our branches.
We could mingle freely. Of course, there were always assholes looking for trouble, which was why I always kept my weapon handy.
With Zane standing beside me, I doubted anyone would be willing to try anything.
The facility resembled a buffet set up for the event, allowing us to choose our own food.
I selected crispy chicken wings coated in a mild, spicy sauce and some golden-fried potato cubes.
Alcoholic drinks remained unavailable until dinner.
Meanwhile, there was water, lemonade, and tea.
Zane and I found a small table and sat down to eat.
“Auri!” I heard a familiar voice yell out. Lili walked to our table and took a seat next to me. I gave her a quick smile.
“Although you’re my Platoon Leader, I still feel like I don’t see you enough,” I said.
“That’s because you don’t. You spend way too many evenings in Zane’s room instead of mine,” she said, giving Zane a look. “Actually, I barely see either of you.”
“Hey, don’t blame me, she’s barely in my room these days either.” Which was true. I had been spending way too many of my evenings alone in my room.
“Hmmm…” She gave me that look I knew too well—the one that said she worried about me. A pep talk would follow. It always did. I had no siblings, but she had filled that space, equal parts steady hand and irritating older sister.
“Anyway, my flight will complete the Rite of Passage soon. We won’t break records.
The goal is to survive, not die fast. And we’re down one.
” My gaze fell to my plate. Clara’s absence dug like a knife.
As a leader, it sat on my shoulders, heavier than it should, even though I knew it wasn’t my fault.
“Your group looks strong, actually. I can’t share times or details from the others, but your flight is doing well.” She smiled, her golden eyes catching the light.
The grief stayed. It always would. But her words sparked something small and steady inside me, a reminder that I hadn’t lost everything. Maybe I was leading them right after all.
“It feels like we have so much more to do and learn, and yet time seemed to be going by quickly.”
“Yeah, when you’re fucking a divine being…” she muttered.
“Oof, are you jealous?” I quipped back to her. Zane stared at me with this sense of amusement.
“No, not really, merely stating the obvious.”
“Hmmm… Well, he is very, very divine to fuck and to be fucked by. Gods, the way his magical divinnnnee tongue works—”
Zane choked and spat his drink across the table, and Lili’s eyes went wide. I started laughing because water was now all over the table, and several people turned to look at us.
“Point taken…” she murmured. He smiled at me while wiping his mess up.
“I simply wasn't expecting all of that… I can show you tonight precisely how—how did you say that—oh yeah, how that divine tongue works, tonight.”
“Simmer down, love. You won’t be able to stand up without showing the world just how divine you are.” I shot him a big smile.
“Any who, it’s not like you aren’t getting laid?” I said.
Her cheeks flushed. “I was just giving you shit, and yes, I am in a situationship with someone.”
“Oh, is that what that is?” I gave her a wink.
“Yes, dating in this place is hard.”
“That it is. ”
“Hey! We are easy,” Zane finally added to the conversation. Lili looked at him like she had almost forgotten he was at the table, like he hadn’t just spat water at us.