37 | Beautiful
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Arriving in the city is weird. I'm used to it, the bustle of people, navigating things with a lot more attention, but I don't usually have to look out for anyone beside myself. My eyes stray over to Ava every chance they get, checking her over before I finally pull my car to a stop.
"Is this the hotel?" Ava asks, unbuckling her seatbelt and turning to look at me.
I shake my head, "No. I have a surprise first."
That little confused frown that makes her lips pout wipes across her face and I have to stop myself from throwing myself forward and kissing her.
"The last surprise you had for me was turning up at my door unannounced," She mutters playfully.
I shrug, brushing off her little complaint.
I'm not worried about this thing I've got planned.
She'll love it. We make our way out the car, the sounds of traffic blending into the air.
I watch as Ava relaxes slightly, comfortable with the fact no one can catch us here.
It's stupid enough that we can be caught doing anything anyway.
The second our bodies come close, heat spurring every time our arms brush in sync, my hand twitches instinctively. Then, with a very small second of hesitation, I attempt to slip my fingers in Ava's. She stiffens, glancing up at me through nervous lashes.
"It's okay," I murmur, probably only seeming like I'm mouthing it above the city noise. Everything halts for a moment, the concern on her face melting into a sense of security. Good.
She lets me in, our hands clasping together. The small warmth, the joint skin, it makes my heart clench in my chest. It feels so right, just like everything this girl seems to do to me.
She's got me talking about secrets I never talk about, inviting her to things I always do alone. Even when she's here with me she's in my head driving me fucking crazy. She's all I can think about, all I want to think about.
And soon she'll be my girlfriend, mine, officially.
We don't have to walk far before I guide her inside a store, her face a a mixture of polite confusion as she surveys her surroundings.
Rows of dresses line every wall, racks overflowing down the middle.
Every colour, every ruffle, every sparkle and make and cut.
An employee spins to look at us, adjusting her glasses before heading over like a prowling tiger. Irene, her tag says.
"Hello," She hums, eyes flicking between us, "Can I help you?"
I nod, clasping Ava's hand tighter, "She would like a dress, for a wedding."
Irene blinks like I've missed something.
"I mean as a guest, for a wedding."
"Right, of course," She hums, flashing a professional smile at Ava, "Come right this way, ma'am."
She begins to walk away, attempting to lead Ava down the long row of racks but Ava stays still, frozen by my side.
"Nolan...what- I have a dress!" She whispers, staring at me.
"And I want to buy you a new one, whichever one you want."
"But-"
"No buts," I assert, firmly. I'm not letting her fight me on this. "Go with the nice lady."
She huffs with her cute exasperation before glancing over to where the woman is waiting, eyeing Ava with a hesitant expression. I'm not sure whether it's the awkwardness of Irene just staring or my own insistence but she goes, slipping out my grip.
I watch, admiring the way her hair falls so perfectly down her back. I miss the feel of it through my fingers, splayed across my chest as we lay in bed.
I find a small bench close to the changing rooms, the muffled voices of Ava's conversation across the store peaking in my ears.
Time splinters, the clock on the wall seeming like an illusion.
I've never been in a fancy place like this, I don't think Ava has either - I think that's obvious by the way Irene looked at us like aliens arriving on a foreign planet.
When they emerge Ava looks slightly frazzled but that smile is there, real and thrilled as a pile of dresses lay eager in her arms. She covers them slightly as she heads to change, "No spoilers."
It makes me laugh but my brain is already painting a million pictures of what she'll look like in a few minutes. She's beautiful all the time, no matter what she wears, and I can imagine this will prove that.
I watch a tiny stain on the floor, check the time on my phone, tune out the voice of Irene now on the phone to a client probably way more important than us.
Waiting for Ava starts to feel like a chore, being without her might as well physically hurt.
That thought makes me pause -am I insane? Has she actuallybroken my brain?
She shatters my brain into a million more pieces about ten seconds later when she walks out, a more sheepish smile on her face, her cheeks fading into pink as she stands in front of me.
"What do you think?" She breathes, voice quieter, "I tried a few but this one...It's definitely my favourite."
I think I'm actually speechless for a few seconds.
Fuck.
My silence makes her giggle nervously, her eyes attempting to meet mine but they're ferociously trailing the length of her figure.
The dress is a dark red, almost burgundy, clinging to every curve, just hitting the floor.
Two thin straps run across her shoulders, the neckline dipping down enough that you can see her collarbones whilst staying wedding-appropriate.
The deep shade brings out the sparkling blue of her eyes, that beautiful blonde of her hair.
Her cleavage is hinted at in the perfect way, fabric bunches in around her waist.
You could kill me right now and I'd be a happy man.
"Nolan?" She murmurs, though by the sound of it I think she's caught on to my awe, "Your opinion?"
"You look incredible, Ava," I say with a swallow, still watching her every move, "Really fucking beautiful."
Crimson drifts harder across her cheeks but her eyes flicker happily, hands smoothing the sides of the dress, "Thank you."
"No, thank you," I mutter back under my breath.
I didn't think she would catch it but she does, expression fading out of soft flush and into something deeper, darker.
The room in the air tightens in seconds, replaced with that burning undercurrent that always hums between us.
Her eyes trace my face more purposefully, lips curl into a smile filled with intention.
"You like this dress a lot, don't you?" She teases, walking a little closer, "Is that why you did this, you wanted to see me all pretty and dressed up for you?"
I lick my lips slowly, decisively. I want to be nonchalant and unbothered but she makes it so hard. There's a big, revealing grin on my face whether I like it or not. But the easiest way to make her squirm is to rival her confidence with my own.
"No" I murmur, encouraging her to edge closer, "You deserve nice things, I have the means to give them to you, so why wouldn't I?"
"Yeah?"
"Wellll," I tilt my head, hands dangerously close to drifting up the sides of her waist, "Maybe I also wanted to dress you up too. You look perfect."
She hums another thanks, leaning down and pressing her hands gently into my knees. My fingers reach her waist instinctively, steadying her as she reaches her mouth over to my ear. She's lazy as she does it, lips brushing my nose and skin with feather-light touch.
"I think you want to see me outof the dress," She whispers, voice so heavy it makes my dick twitch. And she's not wrong, either. In, out, whatever, I don't care. I just need her this close to me for as long as possible.
She pulls back to kiss me. I think it was supposed to be gentle but I meet it with too much force, our mouths crashing together with pent-up hunger and desperation.
My tongue meets her lips, begging for entrance but she has some level of composure because she won't let me in.
Her hand grip my thighs harder at her resistance.
"Excuse me, sir? Ma'am?" The voice of Irene cuts in, hesitant that she's interrupting something.
Ava jumps back immediately, face actually embarrassed. Five seconds ago Irene was across the store, still on the phone, now she's standing here like she wants us out of here as soon as possible. A sigh slips from my mouth, more annoyed that she ruined a good kiss to be honest.
"Yes, sorry," Ava gulps, "I like this one."
"Great, it looks amazing, really suits you," Irene nods, "Bring it to the counter once you've changed and I can get it wrapped up for you." Then she slips away before either one of us can reply.
"That made me want to die," Ava squeals, directing her embarrassment towards me, "That's your fault!"
"My fault?" I say, feigning ignorance.
"Yes, you and all your stupid staring and aggressive kissing."
I smile, "You were the one who whispered, what was it, I think you want to see me out-"
"Shhhh," She hisses, interrupting me but halfway towards a laugh now. Her eyes stay attached to mine for a few fleeting seconds, communicating something hidden.
"I'll be out in a minute."
She emerges a little later and we go up to Irene who still seems very perturbed by our presence. She rings up the dress and Ava's eyes widen at the price, her attention whipping to me like I'm going to suddenly say no or something.
"I told you, I've got this," I murmur.
She still looks surprised but doesn't say anything else, letting it get folded all neatly into a fancy bag. It's not until we've made it outside, the crisp air alleviating the stale stiffness of that store, that she finds something to say to me.
"Thank you, seriously," She catches my hand, forcing me to look at her properly, "I've never owned anything like that in my life, let alone have someone buy it for me. I don't even know why you would..."
I huff a laugh, "You think you're not worth buying gifts for?"
"I don't know..." She shrugs, "I just...no one has ever been that kind. I really appreciate it."
"It's okay, you don't have to thank me. I'd do it a million times over for you."
And I mean it, really mean it. It feels like such a serious thing when I say it too, my heart holding for a beat, tripping over itself. My head clouds and she's the only thing worth looking at, the only thing in front of me.
I almost ask her to be my girlfriend right then and there.
But with a lot of effort, I hold my tongue, coughing away that urge and restarting our course to the car. I have a plan I want to stick to, something actually romantic, something she'll remember. She deserves something special and I'm not going to fuck that up because of stupid impulses.
When we get to the hotel Ava seems a bit awestruck, gazing up at the exploding chandelier in the centre of the lobby. Occasionally, when the wedding pays particularly well (which it does this weekend) I like to go all out, go somewhere fancy. I especially wanted to do that with Ava.
Our room is big, bed in the centre, chairs beside a tall window with a balcony looking over a high-up view of the landscape.
Sparkling city lights twinkle just behind the blinds, different to the warm, dark lighting of the room.
The bathroom door sits open, trailing shadows across the walls, the side of a fancy-looking bath just peeking out.
Ava takes it all in, the dark shades and patterns of the room.
"First the dress...now this?" She huffs, spinning to face where I'm leant up against the wall, arms folded lazily, "How much money do you have?"
I laugh, "It's only two nights."
"Right," She narrows her eyes, trailing fingers across the sheets of the bed, "Because that explains it."
Her sarcasm is not lost on me and I hope she really does understand that I couldn't care how much fucking money is spent on her.
It's probably not good, seeing as I am still trying to save for another camera I've wanted since I was sixteen, but any critical thinking goes out the window the second she smiles at me, pink cheeks and fluttering lashes.
After peeking through the curtains and wandering her way back over to me there's more of a sly glint in her eyes, something that screams, we need to finish what we started earlier.
She hesitates, slowly, then wraps two hands around my cheeks and kisses me, full force.
It jolts my hands off my stomach and they land at her waist, pulling her in instinctively.
"Woah, slow down," I hum into her mouth, pulling away only slightly "We just got here."
"We came here for privacy, right? We should make the most of it," She combats, dragging one hand down and fiddling with the ends of my top.
Her lips dart for mine again, hungry and needy in that way makes me crazy. Too crazy, because it practically hurts to catch her wrist and pause her before we crash together again.
"It's not just about that, you know."
Her smile flattens, not because she's sad, but because she's probably noticed the sudden change in my voice.
Quieter, deeper, filled with that gentle vulnerability that she's seemed to crack open.
I don't even know why I'm saying this, it's like all her attempts at getting through to my closed-off brain have started this waterfall of truth.
"This isn't just about the sex. I don't want this trip to just seem like..."
"Like we're fuck-buddies?" She finishes.
I wanted to say something a bit more graceful than that, but yeah.
I nod.
Her movements still, eyes softening so much I might melt into her, "I know we're not. This is not what this is at all.... I like you way too much for that."
The word girlfriend shoots into my head at lightning speed, once again trying to betray my efforts of asking her properly. I shake the thoughts away, focusing on her strands of hair brushing my hand lightly.
"We wouldn't be making these stupid, irresponsible decisions if it wasn't worth it," She continues, leaning even closer, "This is special, not just hooking up or whatever."
It feels so nice to hear her say it, address that crackling fire in the background of all our interactions. It is special. She's special.
"And I promise you can take me on a date soon, but..."
Just like that the air changes, burns hotter, reignites the desperate flickers in Ava's eyes. I suck in a low breath, study the way her head tilts. My gaze is absorbed by her and I know those lips will be on mine again before I can form a coherent thought.
"But...?" I murmur.
"Right now I need you to kiss me," She leans in, mouth brushing the shell of my ear, "Touch me, please." My hands slide up her leg immediately, instinctively, just as my mouth finds her, all heat and tongue.
Our rhythms melt together, the hazy glow of the room fading into the background until all I can feel is her.
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