Chapter 38 Brad #2
“That’s not true.” I need to touch him. I need to feel him close. I wrap my hands around his face, pulling him in again. “You're all I see, Noah. Please.” I lean my forehead on his.
“What do you want from me?” He keeps his hands on my forearms to keep himself steady.
My eyebrows pinch together. “Isn’t it obvious? I want you to stop leaving me.” I shake my head. “How am I supposed to hang on to you when you keep slipping away? Just wait for me.”
“I’m selfish, Brad. I want to have you. All of you. Now.”
I suck in a breath. “So, have me.” I stand up straight, fumbling with my belt buckle.
“What?” Noah’s eyes red, and tear-rimmed, drop to my fingers.
We’re too deep in this to ever walk away from each other, and I know he feels it too.
“Make love to me. Claim me like I’ve claimed you.” I drop my pants to my ankles and once they’re off, I close the distance between us, crushing my lips to his. Feeling the depth of our raw connection. A tether we’ll never break.
He grabs my waist as I shove him back against the tailgate. Reaching behind him, I knock it down, giving him somewhere to sit, and I’m met with a sharp gasp pressed against my mouth.
His hand quickly finds the blanket I’d stashed on the truck bed at the last minute. When he throws it aside to make room, his eyes widen as his fingers close around something long and firm.
“Is that…?” He lifts the veiny, thick purple dildo, gripping it in his hand. “Is this mine?”
“I found it in your room.” I smile before humming into his neck.
He laughs under his breath, shaking his head as his mouth finds mine again. “You sneaky bastard,” he teases, nipping at my bottom lip. “Planning on fucking me with it?”
I hesitate, pulling back just enough to meet his eyes. “No.” I wet my lips, trying to find the courage inside of me to do what I came here to do. “I want you to fuck me.”
His brows knit as his eyes curiously look over my face. He grips my hips and spins us, pressing me back against the tailgate instead. Deepening our kiss, I melt into his forcefulness.
This is what I needed. I’ve been in control for far too long.
I need to feel him want this—want me—just as badly as I do.
“Come on, Noah. Show me how bad I’ve been. Show me,” I demand, pulling him close.
He looks over my shoulder and hurriedly pushes down my boxers, freeing me from my restraints.
Reaching around my waist, he grips my cheeks, spreading me apart.
His fingers inch toward my asshole until I feel the soft pressure of his fingertip, circling my rim and sending tingles throughout my whole body.
“Don’t be scared of me, baby. Open me up.” I breathe, leaning more into the cab and tilting my hips so he has a better angle. Noah steps in between my legs, staring down at how exposed I am. Completely vulnerable to him. That’s how I am, that’s how I’ll always be.
He pushes his shorts down in one smooth motion, his erection catching the moonlight between us.
“There you are. Fuck, I missed you,” I groan, reaching out between us to grab a fistful of his beautiful dick.
He rests the dildo on my bottom lip, staring at my waiting mouth. “Spit on it,” he orders, quietly.
I stare at his beautiful face as I pool some saliva in my mouth, and drip it slowly on the plastic. Since finding it, this dildo and I have become well acquainted. After lathering it up in the shower, it’s basically mine.
Once satisfied, Noah places it at the edge of my hole, slowly circling my hole before inching it in.
“I can’t believe you put this in without me.” He shakes his head, eyes mesmerized by my ass swallowing the toy.
I try to keep a steady breath. “Stay and you’ll get to watch next time.”
His eyes pinch shut. “Oh God, that sounds amazing.”
I cough a gasp as he presses the dildo further inside of me, before slipping it out. The burn stings, but it's manageable.
His eyes whip open, panic on his brow. “Shit, we should have lube.”
“I don’t care. I want it to hurt.” I groan.
His lips quirk. “You’re going to regret saying that once I’m done with you.”
“No, I won’t. I want to feel you long after you’re done with me.” I pant, pulling him towards me.
“I’ll never be done with you,” he mutters softly.
“Yeah? Prove it,” I order. His eyes snap to mine, making me lose my breath.
I see something flicker behind them as he twists the dildo out in a long stroke, before plunging it back inside of me in a swift thrust. I cough out a gasp, feeling the pressure explode inside of me.
It’s both punishing and rewarding. “You fucker—”
Suddenly, he’s bent over me, wrapping his warm, slick mouth around my cock.
“Shit,” I moan, bucking my hips into his mouth. He holds me down to limit my motion, and instead, takes charge, pumping me with his throat while fucking me with the dildo.
My eyes roll back as he uses his expert tongue to flip and twirl around my swollen tip with his tongue piercing. Every time he hums around me, he sends a rhythm so smooth rippling down my shaft.
“That’s my boy,” I groan. After this past week, thinking about him and missing him, I’m already so close. Getting it from both sides, there’s no way I’m going to last like this. I bury my hands in his hair, trying not to push him down. He’s doing such a fantastic job on his own.
He clearly knows what he’s doing, because as he twists his wrist, he presses the dildo firmly against my prostate, sending involuntary jolts through my hips.
Before I know it, my balls seize and I completely lose control as I erupt inside his mouth. Widening my legs, I allow the pleasure to rip through me.
Noah.
My Noah.
Before I’ve even returned back down to earth, Noah hurriedly stands up, gently removes the dildo, and sets it beside me. Taking his firm dick in his hand, he positions the tip at my edge before he leans over and pours my cum from his mouth right onto my hole.
A low grunt is pulled out of my chest as I feel the sensation of him rimming me with his now slick cockhead.
In one swift thrust, Noah fills me, evoking a loud groan from us both.
Almost like we could read each other’s minds, we quickly cover each other’s mouths with the palm of our hands. We’re still in public and this is riskier than ever. But, fuck. Nothing can stop us now.
Noah wastes no time, thrusting in and out of me, giving me exactly what I want. He’s just as hungry for it as I am. The closeness. The bond that we share. With him filling me, I realize just how much this has always been our language only we can speak. I’ve seriously never felt anything like it.
I moan against his palm, my head falling back as he keeps the steady momentum.
It’s like we’re two parts of a whole. Every time he drives into me, pain blurs into pleasure, like he’s rewriting everything I thought I knew about wanting and being wanted in return.
I’m not surprised in the slightest of how well Noah's fucking me. I grab at the hem of my shirt, pulling it up to my chin so I can keep my abs bare. My cock is already starting to re-thicken, leaking against me.
I take a moment to look at his beautiful face. His dark hair hangs in front of his piercing eyes. The way his strands sways every time he thrusts inside of me. It’s all so much.
“You beautiful fucking boy, come here,” I say breathlessly as his hand slides from my mouth to my throat.
The feeling of his hand gripping my neck intensifies everything as I give into the blinding pleasure, yet again.
I groan, cupping his jaw, bringing him close to me. “I’m so fucking proud of you.”
My core tightens and the ecstasy spreads as he picks up speed.
He presses his forehead against mine, until we share the same breath, watching my release shoot up and decorate my chest.
His abs lightly brush against my cock, continuing to milk me more and more. “You see what you do to me? Aren’t you s-so proud of yourself?” My hips jerk as my words come out choppy and breathless.
An overwhelming amount of pressure fills my chest as we share this monumental moment. He’s taking me for everything I have just like I first did with him in that tent. That coldness in my chest when he’s gone is filled with such a warmth when he’s here. I never want him to leave. Never.
“I love you, Noah,” I say softly. I say it because it’s real. I say it because it’s true. He needs to know how loved he is, and I need to be the one to tell him.
A heavy, low cry escapes from his chest, making him crumble on top of me. “Mmmph—again,” he whimpers into my neck.
“I love you,” I repeat, feeling warmth spread in my ass. I never thought I would be able to feel it. But I do, and it’s glorious.
“Again,” he whimpers, his hips jerking into me.
“I love you, Noah. I’ll always love you,” I repeat. I’ll repeat it as many times as he needs me to. He lays against me as I fall back on the empty cab.
His head falls onto my chest as he rocks himself gently through the aftershocks. His closeness grounds me, allowing me to soak in what I needed all week. Maybe my whole life.
“I love you too,” he sniffles. I pick his head up to look at me, and wipe away the tears that have fallen against his cheeks and down the tip of his nose.
His eyes, so big and dreamy. Damn, he even looks beautiful when he cries. But, I never want to make him cry. I’ll do what I need to do to make sure this doesn’t happen again.
“I’m so sorry for hurting you,” I inhale sharply. “I can’t…I can’t quit you.”
“And I can’t leave you.” Noah sniffles, shaking his head. “So now what?”
We hear a rustle in the distance, commanding us both to look at the side of the cab. We both stop moving, hoping whatever it was will just fade into the night.
After a few seconds, the sound disappears. Must’ve been a little rat or something scurrying across the field.
“I guess that’s our cue to get going. Don’t want to catch a charge out here.” Noah smirks, gently slipping out of me.
Damn, I really liked that feeling of having him fill me up.
I feel wetness drip out of me, making me feel all types of dirty in the best way.
The ache left behind makes me feel wrecked and cherished all at once.
Taking off my button up, I wipe off the mess on my stomach.
“How are we going to explain this one?” I laugh to myself.
I look up to see a distasteful look reflected back at me. Noah slides his shorts up, shaking his head.
Okay, maybe I shouldn’t have said that.
“Noah,” I sigh, hopping off the edge of the truck and pulling up my pants. “I’m going to tell her.”
He straightens his back, looking at me like he’s tired of me saying it. “Yeah…” he says quietly.
He walks over to me and smiles, softly brushing my cheek. For a second, I think I’ve won him back.
But then…I see it.
The flicker of doubt on his face.
“You don’t believe me,” I say.
Noah looks into the distance, back at the fair like he’s unsure of how to answer that.
“You know how I feel about you. But…it doesn’t really change anything, does it?
” Noah shifts awkwardly on his feet. “You’re with my mom and until you’re not…
I just can’t see how this will work. If it was really about her, you would’ve left her a while ago.
You’re clearly just not ready to come out yet.
” He shakes his head, looking at the ground before him like he can’t believe his own words.
Leaving me with my heart in my throat. “You’re not ready, which is okay.
But, until you are…I don’t think it’s fair for either of us to keep stringing this along. ”
I purse my lips, leaning on the truck. His words winding me like they’re a medicine ball to the gut. “So that’s it? After everything. It’s that easy to walk away from me.”
“If that’s what you think, you haven’t been paying attention.” He shakes his head, tapping on the edge of the truck with his fist before walking off.
And I watch him leave, just like I did the night he left that summer. Just like I always do.